Bitcoin Forum

The name of this thread used to be 123 Elm Street.

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I'm toying with the idea of starting an online furniture company, with all products built using reclaimed barn wood. Yes, it's been done before, but if all goes as planned, I'll be the first to exclusively except only Bitcoin as the sole payment option for our one-of-a-kind products.

I'm about to register the domain name, but before I do, I felt it important to ask the community--via a poll--which address I should use. If I opt for the 123 Elm Street address, I will also use a city name that doesn't have an Elm Street, along with using a different zip code that doesn't correspond with the chosen city, but will be fairly nearby. Chances are it shouldn't matter since I'm a trustworthy guy. In fact, I'm so trustworthy, there shouldn't be any problem whatsoever with accepting Bitcoin payments in advance.

The first line I'm planning on building is the Rassah Coffee Table, model number RCT256, similar to the one shown.

http://wildliferecapture.com/forsale/furniture/wolf-coffee-table.jpg

The pre-order price will only be $1,299, and if you're ever unhappy with your purchase, you can return it for a full refund, used toward the purchase price of another fine piece of reclaimed barn wood furniture of equal or greater value.

RCT256 Specs:

• 1 large taxidermied wolf.
• 80+ year old barn wood.
• 18" Wide
• 30" Long
• 16" High

I chose to be conservative with the above specs, therefore a many customers may receive the RST256 with 2 medium sized taxidermied wolves, built with reclaimed barn wood older than 100 years old, and measuring 20" X 36" X 18" or larger.

I look forward to seeing the poll results so that I can get the company name registered. Meanwhile, I'm looking at the beginning of the week of Thanksgiving to start shipping out the first orders, but no later than Christmas.

Another product I'll planning on introducing is a reproduction of the following crate, but with a twist. When acting as an end table and plugged in, it will keep your favorite hot beverage at your desirable temperature.

http://www.lamp-tramp.com/images/scott_brady_images/atlas_wood_powder_box.jpg

Thanks for taking the poll and here's to hoping that you enjoy this thread.

~Bruno K~

Ive heard the foundation needs a new conference desk  :)

I was hoping to save this surprise for down the road, but since we have an eager-beaver in our mist, look what I have planned for only $29,899.

http://www.cmstatic1.com/9431/9431.84658.jpg

Thanks to all who've voted in the poll. So far it looks like 123 Elm Street is trailing.

Due to recent competition, I had to increase the size of the RCT256 coffee table, but luckily not the price point. Here are the new spec.

RCT256 Specs:

• Mating pair of taxidermied wolves.
• 100+ year old barn wood.
• 22" Wide
• 36" Long
• 17" High

Inspired by a certain member of this forum, one of my 22 employees is currently building a prototype of the following bench. Contact me if you desire to pre-order the BB512.

http://www.gilsoffthehook.com/bear%20bnch2.jpg

All those who pre-order will receive this fine rum rack, an $89 value, as an appreciation gift.

http://www.rusticfurnituremall.com/sites/default/files/imagecache/product_full/DRWR04-TetonWineRack.png

Phinn, could you design a prototype bench for a hookah bar?

Damn! Damn! Damn! The competition is getting tougher. I've just updated the specs on the RCT256.

RCT256 Specs:

• Mating pair of REAL wolves.
• 200+ year old barn wood.
• 24" Wide
• 48" Long
• 18" High

I'm currently working with a client that desires their hookah lounge to resemble the following image, provided his loans come through.

http://wilmingtonillinois.weebly.com/uploads/5/3/5/2/5352083/9730386_orig.jpg

Love the still up on that balcony

Rum, fit for Danking.  ;D

I would like to order three of the wolf tables but only on condition that I can also order a custom made table with a scale model of the death star enclosed

Luckily for me, I'm blessed with a fabulous team of 21 young men and women, and one I'm-not-sure-what-he/she-is. They quickly designed what you requested with an added bonus--it's disguised as a coffee cup holder.

http://img3.etsystatic.com/000/0/6201539/il_fullxfull.271352371.jpg

Interesting merchandice, gl with the venture : )

UPDATE

To keep up with the competition, we at BarnWoodLabsInternational (BWLI) now provide a DOUBLE LIFETIME GUARANTEE. That's right. Every piece of furniture pre-ordered can now be replaced for free in your second life, whether you were the original purchaser or not.

Also, I didn't have time to put this in our recent newsletter, but soon we will be incorporating in Wyoming under the names of one guy from Costa Rica with a checkered past, and a little know French furniture designer whose claim to fame is designing furniture for elevators. (pause--give me a sec--I'm laughing my ass off while typing this shit)

<back>

Currently, we're seeking a PR guy preferably from the Midwest with a background in CommunityBoosting.

All products will go through a 12 day endurance test in a RL hostile home environment prior to shipping.

To produce our furniture line quicker, thus decreasing the wait time for all pre-orders, we are taking delivery of the following.

http://i.ebayimg.com/t/2003-WOOD-MIZER-MODEL-M485SP-5-HEAD-MOULDER-TOOLING-INCLUDED-/00/s/NzIwWDk2MA==/$(KGrHqR,!jgF!thetGcUBQL+,35z0w~~60_57.JPG

Dude, I was going to call bullshit about your operation, but before I did, and living just down the road a piece, I opted to first take a look-see, and lo and behold, a mighty fine setup you have there, if I may say so myself.

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_mfwl2KBT-r0/TOgwapO7eQI/AAAAAAAACO0/hgaYpaplgQ8/s1600/Cut+Barn+Wood.jpg

I spoke personally with Bruno's foreman, Sonny K, and even petted his dog Skype. More images are forthcoming, for it was getting dark outside due to this one cloud.

Regards

Al

Why don't you take your balcony bologna elsewhere?

Regards

Al

Hey, Al, you're the type of guy I've been looking for to do the PR for BWLI. Think you're up to it? I'll even give you a title--BWLI_Al.

~Bruno~

Sounds great! This way it'll free you up to conduct the engineering side of the operation, and I handle all the pre-orders issues that may arise on the forum.

Regards

BWLI_Al

Actually, a guy named Nasser is the lead engineer, Sonny is the foreman with his dog, Skype, and now you, Al, our PR guy.

Meet the rest of the gang.

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Becky, in charge of assembling.

http://davisw.files.wordpress.com/2010/06/helen-thomas.jpg

Brothers, Darryl and Darryl, in charge of machine maintenance.

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_-oFW_zm6yAc/SPfjF0YMezI/AAAAAAAAAVQ/SzCIvRyta6k/s400/redneck_mentor.jpg

Russuh, in accounting.

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m8t1tbV1pR1rxzodko1_500.jpg

And a few of our loyal Mexicans tradesmen.

http://www.teakinfo.com/wp-content/uploads/teak-factory-workers.jpg

Welcome aboard, Al.

~Bruno~

After a good night's sleep on a fresh bed of straw, I'm here to report that BWLI Inc. will be listing its IPO on the Global Barn Wood Exchange (GLBWE). Dr. Nefnef, a Chinese veterarian, who operates the exchange, will be handling the IPO, as well as all the bitcoins deposited to purchase the 1M shares of BWLI Inc.

Meanwhile, back on the production line, I present to you our new creation--a pie safe.

http://www.pioneercabincompany.com/images/store/PieSafe.jpg

Regards

BWLI_Al

Your pi safe is missing 0.14159 of a shelf.

Look here, fuckturd! The fine company I now represent never said ANYWHERE that the shelves will be full shelves. What I don't understand is why you didn't praise us for having three shelves when our closest competition only has two. And we make our shelves in house, whereas theirs is probably farmed out to some outfit in Costa Rica, let's say.

That said, we hired a new girl, Sylvia Boots (below), to handle the shelving issue you were so kind to bring to our attention, therefore guit bothering us, for each time we come here to address concerns from you fuckturds, it takes away time to get all our pre-orders out in time.

BWLI_Al

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-zCQb2iWFaWY/UETxxlsMCvI/AAAAAAAALZM/aF-3ztTyH04/s1600/Mercantile+2-14_0096.jpg

I like your work, can you make a cool carved chair with a cushion on the seat and back?  Like a king chair.  My friend has a cool ass one.

With or without the ottoman?

http://cache.trustedpartner.com/images/library/000326/Email%20Images/1-26/023%20(Small).JPG

You see, I have an appreciation for efficiency, as I will be buying lots of your hardware. Can you guarantee me the operating costs will be less than 0.001 Newtons per eon?

what would the weight of that chair be ? is it more or less than a box of pre 1983 pennies or 68 pounds?

BWLI_Bruno here, for Al is either at a hardware show convention or fucking my Maria. My hope is that it's the latter, for I would be pissed if he attends some show without me, especially on my dime bag.


You meant pre 1981 pennies which, by the way, is how I learned about Bitcoin for the very first time last year (truly). The weight of that particular chair will be close to exactly the same weight of similar design and quality.


I will guarantee anything to keep the pre-orders a flowing, so the answer to your question is yes. BTW, I love Newtons too.

http://trehops.files.wordpress.com/2010/06/fig_newtons.jpg


Being the design of our ottoman stems from the Ottoman Empire, all our ottomans will be 51% larger than any specs posted.

For the ottoman enthusiast who prefer iron oppose to wood, we will be building the BFO (below). Granted, we don't know a damn thing about metal, but we will quickly go through the learning curve since pre-order moneys is at stake.

http://www.cheapchicdecor.com/images/products/10061.JPG

Also, if anybody here is interested, we're thinking about developing a coffee table that also mines bitcoin like the one pictured below.

http://cubeme.com/blog/wpcontent/uploads/2010/07/Geeky_Coffee_Table_Tade_Old_Computer_Parts.jpg

I think I can see my house from here.

You, sir, are an electron.

Are you positive?

Only one thing is for sure: you certainly aren't.

Phin: You seem to have the same sense of humor as the guy who writes these: http://www.dontevenreply.com/view.php?post=110

You should do something like that :P

Thanks, Garr. You gave me a wonderful idea.

http://therestaurantfairy.files.wordpress.com/2010/01/img_14211.jpg

For those who are not aware, this thread is satire. I do have a serious venture in the works if anybody is interested.

~Bruno~

I will offer 5 BTC for the $30k table set..... Deal?

No deal! But would entertain a trade for a pink Prius if you happen to have possession of one.

How about an image of one with my wife on the hood? (She won't dent the hood I swear)

Interesting! I've never masterbated to an image of a pink Prius before. Please send photo, and make sure that when it was snapped, the car, if you want to still call it take, was in drive. Meanwhile, I take a pic of NaNa laying naked on the table. I'll assume you know which NaNa I speak of.

And you, my friend, are a moron. I see what you're doing here. You're trying to derail Bruno's thread. I wouldn't be surprised if you're one of MyBarnWood's sockpuppets.

Just to show you how smart I am, I did a little Googling and learned that I speak Korea and am a Furry. SO THERE!

BWLI_Al

Al, like me, you love satire and all, but can you be a little less terse toward prospective pre-orderers? Korean and a Furry--sometimes you really crack me up, Al. What next? You learn you were in the Navy. Seriously, whatever you do, don't put the following in your sig: People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs.

BWLI_Bruno