Bitcoin Forum

https://i.imgur.com/nBy8Q.jpg

THE FIVE PILLARS OF IKBOP:  These pillars represent our commitment to excellence and the core values we hold.

1.  Karma: The justness of the universe.
2.  Friendship:  The relationships between bank and customer.
3.  Ponies: That by which we cultivate our financial growth.
4.  Magic:  The power our friendship unleashes.
5.  Honour: A commitment to serving the community.


Greetings Businessmen,

My name is Treacheroso Von Pahnzi III and I have been appointed Chief Executive Officer of a new and exciting bank by Bank Manager and Owner Twilight Sparkle and I am now seeking additional investors via this forum.  Here is some information about our banking business.

Pony Karma Guarantee

The Pony Karma Gurantee is a type of karma based insurance.  Friendship is the key to magic and not paying off your debt is a quick way to lose your friends and your magic, this means our bank will have motivation to avoid such behavior.  Pony Karma Bank is not at all based on simple trust.    We are insured both by magic and by sound investment.  In addition, every potential investor is required to undergo a karmic interview to guarantee it is wise to enter into a business relationship with them.  

Many other karmic banks hide the type of investments they are involved with, but with Pony Karma Bank we are very clear about our business:  Ponies.

Ponies have over the years proven to be a very positive investment for many individuals.  Pony Karma Bank invests in ponies in places such as:

Belmont and Saratoga Springs, New York
Arlington Heights, Illinois
East Rutherford, New Jersey
Hallandale Beach, Florida  
Louisville, Kentucky

And many others with a tested system that guarantees return.

Interest chart:

We don't need one.  The investment is simple:  10% payoff weekly, every Monday.

Currently invested: 2850 BTC

Available duration: Weekly, Monthly

AND THERE'S MORE!  

https://i.imgur.com/Wwofp.jpg

Starting now, a free gift with every new account! A toaster may seem a cliche gift for a bank, but this is no ordinary toaster.  This is the best toaster in the world.  This is what Bitcoin Karmic banking is all about.  It is the next financial evolution, everything is bigger and better here.  

In addition to pony investments at various locations, the bank manager Twilight Sparkle is perusing a career as a great artist and investments go towards this effort.  Here is Twilight Sparkle's latest great work as a sample of the brilliance that is available:

It is a representation of "Madonna and Child", a recurring theme among the classical artists of Catholic and Eastern Orthodox communities.  

https://i.imgur.com/N4OMs.jpg

This particular example was styled after "Madonna of Humility" (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Monaco%27s_%22Madonna_of_Humility%22_IMG_3850.JPG) by Italian artist Lorenzo Monaco and as Twilight Sparkle has explained to me it is the greatest work of art of the 21st century so far.

We are planning to hold an international art show in several months to sell Twilight's paintings and make us all quite a bit of money.  Our plan is to rent Musée du Louvre in Paris.  Any donations or investments towards this goal are welcome.

We are now open for business.  If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to post in this thread.  If you would like to invest, please contact me directly:

treacheroso@gmail.com  

Bank Manager/Majority Owner: Twlight Sparkle
Chief Executive Officer: Treacheroso Von Pahnzi III
Chief of Security: capn noe
Head Teller: repentence

Still seeking Head Teller and assistant bank tellers to help handle customer service.  Also seeking Bitcoin celebrity endorser for advertisements.

What did I just read >.<

Oh no. Not another Pony Scheme.

Mr. Pahnzi,

Can't put my finger on it, but there is something about you I just trust.  I'm in!

I'm ready to invest in that lovely art work. I see the investment potential. I'm in!

Thank you for your interest, wise investors.  Please contact the above posted e-mail address to begin your karmic interview to assure you are compatible with the spiritual energies of our bank. 

Payouts have gone out today to our pioneer club of initial investors who represent the very tippy top of the karmic best that all other investors below look up at and admire.  Don't delay!

Too much effort.
Now STFU and take my money!

[edit] Official rating:
Diple trank.

Hello,

I am posting here as the newest investor of 250 BTC at the request of Mr. Von Pahnzi to talk about my experience with the karmic interview and to assure everyone that it is a positive and enlightening experience that I am sure you will find assures you of the spiritual and financial compatibility with the Pony Bank.  

I was nervous at first, but it was a very painless process.  Mr. Von Pahnzi asked me a few simple questions that he said would help reveal my spiritual profile.  All he requested of me was that I answered with honesty and thoughtful consideration and he would pass the answers to the Bank Manager to review.  

Soon after, I received approval and we handled the more mundane business matters before I transferred the BTC.  Mr. Von Pahnzi and Twilight Sparkle both shared identification papers with me and I have confirmed they are genuine.  I have no fear they would be dishonest with me now, as if karma was not enough in the first place. (it is)

I am looking forward towards my first payout next week and I think every compatible soul should do their karmic banking with IKBOP.

MY SIDES

Lol.

Hey SA goons!  Welcome to the Bitcointalk forums  :P

Why did you change your sockpuppet?

Was it already filthy?

E-mail sent, Mr. Von Pahnzi. 

I am unsure of what your question is.  Twlight Sparkle has hired me as CEO and I am handling the day to day operations until our new teller is hired.  Twilight Sparkle is still intimately involved with the bank as Owner, Staff Artist, and Chief Karmic Accountant. 

The sad thing is I would legit invest with Mr. Pahnzi before I would with Dank.   ;D

Mr. Dan has passed the karmic examination and his investment of 300 BTC has been accepted. 

Pony Karma Bank has quickly become the largest karmic bank in all of Bitcoin.  Hooray!

>Ponies
>Von Pahnzi
>10% per week

seems legit

You're doing it wrong.

Got some karmic training from my Indian guru via Skype.
Application sent.

Official rating will be updated if application is accepted and first interests have been received.

Thank you,
  ~drekk~

Hi, i was wondering if you had a valid federal pony identification program registration number for verification.  prepared to send 50btc.

I can not find your e-mail application to begin the karmic interview. I am not good at this direct customer service stuff!  We should have a teller for this!  Please re-send so we may begin!


We are a fully official and licensed company!  Please contact us to begin the karmic interview and we will provide you with any information you require to proceed before accepting any investment.


Our amazing business may be hard for the karmicly untuned to accept, but smart investors in ponies have practically no ceiling on their potential earnings.  We have a system, and our system works.

6/10.

I'd give you more, but mocking the mentally ill is about as difficult as getting a ribbon at the Special Olympics.

Our amazing initial growth and success has blown us away!  Twilight Sparkle prepared this chart for the occasion!

https://i.imgur.com/Gz7VS.jpg

The karmic drive behind the economic engine that makes this business grow means that we will never be satisfied until we have even more!  To that end, I am pleased to announce a special offer for all new investors!

Feast your eyes on the free gift to be provided to all new account holders (And of course sent out to our pioneer club members as well!):

A free toaster!

https://i.imgur.com/Wwofp.jpg

Now, a toaster may seem a cliche gift for a bank, but this is no ordinary toaster.  This is the best toaster in the world.  This is what Bitcoin Karmic banking is all about.  It is the next financial evolution, everything is bigger and better here. 

Do you have the right Karma to be a part of this amazing banking movement?  There is only one way to find out, request a karmic interview today:

treacheroso@gmail.com

Doctor Treachario, I have a question.

Will you be holding a XMas Festival in the desert sometime soon? Your competitor has offered one and my coins have expressed a wish to go to a festival.

Did you mean for you post to read


because that's how your post reads in conjunction with your signature.

Can I have a 'karmic interview' please? But we have to do it here public so everyone can see.

Sure.

You're in a desert and you're walking along in the sand and all of a sudden you look down and you see a tortoise.  It's crawling towards you. You reach down and you flip the tortoise over on its back. The turtoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs, trying to turn itself over but it can't, not without for your help. But you're not helping. Why is that, Buffer?

That idea sounds wonderful, however our current focus is on the international art show we are planning in Paris to display Twilight Sparkle's art.   Here is another work:  It is a soup can in the style of American pop art icon Andy Warhol.

https://i.imgur.com/0hKrZ.jpg


I have discussed this with Twilight Sparkle and have been informed that conducting the interview in public would make your spirit very difficult to read.  It is possible readings from myself or other customers in this thread would interfere with the examination process.  However, there is nothing to stop you from posting a transcript of the words exchanged after your interview, though that is only the surface of the process.

Because I'm an android and have no concept of human emotion.

That's a shame. I've got 2750 BTC burning a hole in my wallet, urgently needing to be invested. Oh well, never mind. We'll have to give it a miss then.

I am taking deposits in the "Hey dumb asses give me your money" Bank.. :D


I will pay... maybe... sometimes.. depends if I get enough deposits... you in?

Thank you for your interest.  No matter how big or small, we cannot accept an investment without a proper karmic interview.  Without our karmic insurance properly maintained, we cannot continue to guarantee our impressive returns to our customers.

Oh well, never mind. I'll blow it all on Satoshi Dice then.

May the dice favor you, good sir.

The rent is too damn high.

I am not from America and your politics are strange and confusing to me.  I am much more at home in the international business world, and because of that I am more a fan of Mitt Romney than other alternatives. However, as a non-citizen my opinion is not particularly relevant on this matter.

Bank Owner Twilight Sparkle is American and has mentioned "Jill Steen" as a preferred candidate, but I am not familiar with this person or their policies.

Now that is funny lol, good catch.  Didn't even think about those combining.   

Are you related to Borat?

Do you provide loans? I know this is a joke or whatever, but I'm actually looking to borrow some BTC in order to take time off of work so I can develop my low cost ASIC mining hardware. I've come up with a pretty neat algorithm that could shave a lot of time off of the mining process.

-Zoey

I have forwarded my application for the position of Head Teller.  As you're no doubt aware, in the world of conventional banking the primary qualifications required for this position are being middle aged and bitchy, criteria against which I'm confident I will easily surpass other candidates.

nt

I call scam. You said there are five pillars when there clearly are six pillars in the drawing.

LOL well spotted. An investment bank that can't count passed five.

Ponyville shot down in flames. Booooooommmmmmmm

More like Pantsville.

Is the toaster using the latest in distributed toasting technology and automatically mints 50 slices of toasted bread every 10 minutes?  If so I'm in.

Haha, excellent movie!  You are making fun of the way I speak!  My family is originally Italian but I grew up around the world as my father's international business travels required.  My mother is German.


We do offer loans in certain circumstances if karmicly approved.  Please contact us for a karmic interview:  treacheroso@gmail.com


We are pleased to welcome our newest employee, head teller repentence!  We will be hiring several assistant tellers in the near future. 

Reminder, our company bylaws note that in case of bank theft owner Twilight Sparkle is not held responsible for any losses.  CEO, Chief of Security, and head teller hold this responsibility. 


Twilight Sparkle has informed me that what is presented in the logo is an "artistic interpretation" of five pillars.  That it is clearly not five pillars is totally irrelevant. 


This toaster can reach the stated performance goals, though I believe it is a stand-alone device.

This place really could have used your uncommon perceptive abilities during the pirate and Nefario/theymos heists.

The sad part is that this is a Dank parody (I assume) that has slightly more credibility than Dank's "bank".

As I have said, this business is entirely legitimate and karma insured.  There is nothing for anyone to worry about on that regard. 

Our new investors have increased our holdings by 250 BTC and the first round of toasters has shipped!  Congratulations all around to the entire Pony Bank team!

I will be away on vacation for the next week at my second home in Grand Cayman.  Please address any customer service inquiries to Head Teller repentance. 

In thanks for my efforts in spearheading the launch of IKBOP, Twilight Sparkle has provided this art:

https://i.imgur.com/WSoVY.jpg

Of course the issuer goes on "vacation" now.

I was a trusting investor and happily waiting for my toaster.

And here is what I received:

http://blog.ivman.com/wp-content/HelloKittyToaster.jpg

I don't know what to say.

This isn't even a scam this is worse it's... it's just so wrong.  :'(

Here's what I received:

http://i45.tinypic.com/2aiklkj.jpg

haha!  You are making funny jokes at us!  Bless you, gentlemen, bless you.

To be clear to all our fine prospective pony investors, these gentlemen are not customers and have not even passed a karmic interview.  All toasters are as originally described.  I am a man of good Christian faith and I do not lie. 

Off to the airport now!

Yeah well, you can at least heat bread in yours.

Look at what toaster I got.

http://richardjgomez.com/gallery/photos/George%20toasting%20Daddy%207-14-07.JPG

I don't even know how to turn this thing off or on. Also it keeps making weird noises.

Wasn't pirateat40 one of those religious folk as well? He never lied.

There are no prospective investors! And very unlikely to be any in the foreseeable future.

SA shills!  Assimilate!

I find your lack of faith disturbing.

And here we are in Off-topic while dank's music festival thread remains in Long term Offers.   ::)

Theymos has a working brain apparently. :)

It clearly says that Mods do not remove apparent scams

At this time I would like to announce that Head Teller repentance has been fired from his position with IKBOP. I was barely out the door on my vacation before our bank was moved to the off-topic forum and we have lost 500 BTC in deposits from confused customers who felt this was a signal the bank was in financial trouble.  Nothing could be further from the truth.  I do not blame repentance entirely for this occurrence, but as it happened on his watch I have no choice but to make him accountable.  Thank you for your service, you will receive a toaster as severance.

We are now accepting new applications for the position of Head Teller.

Pay?

Who were these fictitious customers????

Pay will be negotiated with the applicant. 


Dear Sir, we have many fine customers.  You seem to be holding a grudge against our bank for some reason, nothing is to stop you from requesting a karmic interview and becoming the newest member of our banking family.

And what's best is that you only feel a small pinch during the karmic interview, its all over in about 15 minutes or so.

Even though my watch suddenly showed 4 hours later. That was kinda weird.

What a coincidence my karmic interviewer lost his watch during my interview...

No grudge. I just don't believe there are any customers.


Also you might want to consider that the word 'Pony' can mean a few other things here in the UK:

Noun. 1. £25 sterling.
2. Rubbish, nonsense. E.g."Our team are a load of old pony and don't deserve to be in the final."
3. An act of defecation. E.g."Can you wait for me? I need to have a pony."
4. A piece of excrement.
* Versions 2, 3 and 4 are from the rhyming slang pony and trap meaning 'crap'.

Guess you didn't know about this before naming your bank 'Ponyville'.

Our many customers are all we care for, your views are not relevant to this at all. 

I did not name the bank, good sir.  Bank Owner Twilight Sparkle, an aficionado of a television program known as "My Little Pony - Friendship Is Magic" has named the bank.  Regardless, you appear to be using a slang dictionary, the actual definition of the word pony is widely and truly known.

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/pony

a : a small horse; especially : one of any of several breeds of very small stocky animals noted for their gentleness and endurance
b : a bronco, mustang, or similar horse of the western United States
c : racehorse —usually used in plural

Given our investment areas I think it is quite clear what we mean.  Thank you for your time.

A bank named after "My Little Pony"!!!!
How old is this twinkle character. 4 or 5?

I am told the program enjoys wide appeal among periphery demographics. (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/PeripheryDemographic)

Yeah, there's a bit of a difference between an adult watching say 'Toy Story' (which is great film) and an adult sitting down on their own and watching 'My Little Pony'.

Oh?  What difference would that be?  I'm not familiar with either program.

Well tell your mates at work you watched 'Toy Story', then tell your mates you watched 'My Little Pony' and report back to me with their reaction to each.

Many people at our bank are also good fans of this program, they have mentioned it before.  I am not sure what you are trying to suggest.

Just follow my instructions and all will be revealed. Assuming of course you actually work.

lol I'm curious now if someone has lost touch with the reality of the situation and if they know it's them lol...

Wow! this sounds great, perfect timing and all as today I received an email telling me I won the Nigerian lottery, how lucky am I as I don't even remember entering it.

Will be investing my winnings with your bank once dareq sends the winnings to my mybitcoin.com account.

LOL
Mr Treacheroso Von Ponzi is probably running this lottery as well as this scam.

His name is Mr Treacheroso Von Pahnzi and I do not believe that this is a scam. Why would someone tell lies on the internet to try and fool people out of money? That would bring bad karma, even dank knows that.

Because it's the internet. Ever see the state farm commercial?

No, please Doctor House tell me more :)

I would think if this were legit it wouldn't be in the off-topic section *points to wilson* it's his fault.

Its legit, did you not see the pics of the toasters that happy customers have already gotten?  Those were real toasters!

I'm sure they were ;)

This thread belongs to the Lorax.

I put my faith in you with my Bitcoins as much as I would trust a pack of starving dingos with my firstborn child.

I once had a baby and starving dingos.... now I just have dingos.  They're so cute!

Smart trade :) And now they're well fed.

But wait!!! Have you foolishly forgot about the Pony Karma Guarantee?


Sounds like a load of pony to me. LOL  :D

This thread is great! ;D

So sad and so funny at once, like duality.

Like Rebecca Black, or presidential debates.

Those are just about the same level, more of a singularity.

Greetings Potential Investors!

All is well in the land of IKBOP.  I have returned from my vacation and all payments were automatically made on Monday despite the many challenges of doing business midst the terrible Hurricane Sandy in Lower Manhattan where our corporate headquarters are located. 

Delivery of toasters will be delayed as we have decided to donate the current stock on hand to the hurricane Sandy relief efforts.  We have received new investment of 250 BTC this week.

We are still searching for a new Head Teller, your applications are welcome.

Here is some art Twlight Sparkle has prepared.  Twilight Sparkle was inspired by the work Guernica by Pablo Picasso (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guernica_%28painting%29), a masterpiece of art which illustrated in stunning detail the essence of the suffering resulting from modern warfare.  Twilight Sparkle has created a similar work to illustrate the grave nature of the human tragedy of hurricane Sandy and the devastation the storm left in it's wake.

https://i.imgur.com/W8ELG.jpg

What's the transaction ID's of these claimed Monday payments please? Of course you'll have to either ignore this post or create some feeble excuse not to because no payments went out, because you have no investors!

LOL  :D

High comedy is what this is all about  ;D

I'm still in two minds if this thread is a joke scam or a real scam.

Ahh, but is it? We'll never know.

You should probably read this, then you get what this joke is about:

I thought Dank Bank was a joke scam. Ahh, but is it? We'll never know.

He's also looking for a head teller and you look like just the person for the job!

Yes, a scam that has returned 339 BTC in principle loans and persistently follows the initial contract agreement.

Thought so. Thank you for your honesty Dank.

For the safety and security of our clients, detailed IKBOP financial information is only provided to those who have passed the karmic interview process.  Serious potential investors who have passed the interview can review these records prior to making any financial commitment to the bank as a further illustration of our honest and trustworthy nature.


I have forwarded your information so the process may begin.


Please do not harass my good fellow karmic businessman Mr. Dank.  Both of our proud financial institutions are cornerstones of honesty and good dealings in the community, unlike the many failed non-Karmic institutions which litter in ruin the economic landscape.

Don't worry bitcoin addresses won't reveal your clients. Perfectly safe.

Now I'll ask again. Can we have the block chain transaction ID's please of last Mondays payments. No excuses this time.

Good sir, repeating your question will not change the answer.  I am happy to provide you with the information you have requested as soon as you pass a karmic interview. 

Translation: "I can't give out any transaction ID's because they don't exist."

LOL  :D

Good sir, I have just told you exactly how to obtain the information you are seeking.  You are discussing this matter in bad faith.

Don't fancy one of your brainwashing sessions thanks.

LOL  :D

Please don't denigrate Professor Teacherorso's interview process as a brainwashing session. I have independently audited his sessions and can confirm that interviewees still have naughty thoughts after the process, which confirms no washing of the brain whatsoever took place. The interview simply confirms if the interviewee will act upon these naughty thoughts to determine the interviewees karmic status.

Another Monday, another 10% to all of our fine investors.  The sayers of neigh will be quiet today!

Very interested in investing, please pm me for karmic interview process initiation!

**edit**

emailed 11-6-2012

E-Mail Treacheroso@gmail.com and I will pass your information along to our karmic accounting department, good sir!

Never did hear back from treach after filling out initial survey.

I was really hoping for the toaster....  :-\

And there goes my retire on good deeds plan. How much good deeds will I have to do now until I have all this Karma back?

I am sure Space Emperor Tre'ac4e-r0so is on a higher plain of existence now on board the GSS Satoshi.

Hey wtf.. I did my interview and you ignore me... I guess my answers revealed that I should be president of this "Bank" :D

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2p6LVZFLSfw