Print Page - 👻 Bitcoin is dead. Why I may sell all my Bitcoin for Yacoin! 🔥🚀🌜

Note to moderators: Yes, this post is really about Bitcoin. It is a satirical meta-commentary on Bitcoin’s value.

TL;DR: Bitcoin is dead. It has died so many times (https://99bitcoins.com/bitcoin-obituaries/) that it is extremely dead. It is too good to succeed, or even to survive. In this world, the bad wins over the good; therefore, you should buy the worst coin of all: Yacoin.

Bitcoin has a problem: The Core developers take things too seriously.

They cannot, must not drop a trillion dollars in value on the floor. They must not break the network. Bitcoin is now so big that a major technical flaw could cause a mass economic catastrophe. Core must be maintained as the safest, most secure, most reliable financial software in the world. All code gets reviews, more reviews, and yet more reviews by scary-smart crypto-geniuses. Core’s process is a masterpiece of open-source software engineering; and the code is accordingly good.

As a result, Bitcoin is boring. Sure, its reference implementation is safe to trust with the world’s money. But who cares?

I had a moment of enlightenment when Dogecoin recently spiked. For you see, last year, I had considered buying DOGE at 25 sats. Doing my due diligence, I examined the state of Dogecoin development. I found that both the Doge full node and the “official” light client were essentially abandonware; and Reddit was full of complaints about bugs.

Only an idiot would trust the DOGE network with nontrivial, non-toy amounts of money.

It’s ok. DOGE started as a joke, right?

Then, of course, Elon Musk tweeted; and,—BOOM! Of a sudden, idiots were trusting billions of dollars to a cryptocurrency run on bug-riddled abandonware.

This is PROOF that Dogecoin is superior to Bitcoin. For you see, so-called “humans” are merely hairless monkeys who have inadvertently learned to talk. They do not care about facts, logic, or basic competence; they care only about the meme. Doge has a cute meme. Therefore, Doge = MOON.

Now, I have discovered an even better meme: The power of human stupidity.® It is best exemplified by Yacoin.

Yacoin’s code is worse than Doge’s. Much worse. It is so bad that according to a Yacoin supporter (https://bitcointalk.org/index.php?topic=206577.msg56682702#msg56682702), Yacoin lacks exchange listings because exchanges are unable to run Yacoin nodes. Yes, it sucks just that much! Therefore, it is the best.

Consider the following PROOFS that Yacoin beats Bitcoin as an investment.

0. Confirmed maths: A price of “N/A”, “NULL”, or “NaN” can only improve!

Yacoin does not have zero value: It has no value, because it has no market. Therefore, if it attains any value at all, that will be market performance of >∞% ROI. I mean, what can you multiply by NaN to get a number? :o

1. Yacoin is Bitcoin^Ethereum!

Yacoin combines aspects of Bitcoin and Ethereum development processes. Therefore, I expect its performance to be Bitcoin exponentiated by Ethereum:

Bitcoin: Move slowly. Don’t break things.
Ethereum: Move fast and break things. Because, fuck it: We want to get rich quick!
Yacoin: Move slowly and break things. The code quality sucks, development has been moribund for years, and the whole thing is riddled with design flaws. It is so bad that to avoid the impracticality of sync, people are told to download the blockchain from a Yacoin developer’s Mega account, and import it without validation (!). Trust me. And its codebase is derived from Bitcoin Core v0.8.6, apparently without further merges from upstream; this means that its development process is even more conservative than Bitcoin’s: The Yacoin devs keep all the obsolescence of an ancient Bitcoin version, plus all the bugs and design flaws that they themselves added.

Bitcoin Core development is like programming the Space Shuttle. But Yacoin will go TO THE MOON!

For the foregoing reasons, I may dump my Bitcoin to BUY YACOIN!!!11 Or perhaps, I may simply tell people to send me Yacoin so that I get rich when it moons someday never. I have not yet decided; and I face the small practical problem that I do not yet have a Yacoin address, because the software is too bad to run.

This thread will be updated with more more reasons why Bitcoin is too good to succeed, and of course, with instructions for sending me the best worst coin: Yacoin.

TO THE MOON!

Claimer: The foreging constitutes financial advice, because I like it when idiots lose money. It is a stupidity tax. You = bagholder, so go BUY YACOIN RIGHT NOW on its nonexistent market. Lulz.

Disclaimer: Thsi post was written buge like doge shit because I am drukn (https://bitcointalk.org/index.php?topic=375643.0), or pretending to be.

Bitcoin Forum

Bitcoin => Bitcoin Discussion => Topic started by: nullius on April 01, 2021, 02:11:35 AM