I 'm special in a way I make myself occupied when I'm not supposed to be occupied. special in a way how I ignore someone even if it hurts to death. special in a way I accept all the obvious false excuses. special in a way I choose to stay silent even if I'm not supposed to be silent. And most Special in a way I keep coming back to something or should I say someone that hurts me the most. 

think of how good you are. 
smile at him and you'll see how mad he is to you. kill them with your happiness.

When I was a kid I thought life is all about happiness. and I was obviously wrong because life is unfair.