Hi everyone!

My name is Caroline and I'm a newer-than-new newbie. I am interested in Bitcoin and over the last week or so I read just about everything there is to read about the topic.

My reaction is: "huh? What?". In other words: I am totally confused about the point of this venture.

I understand that a) it's kind of secure, b) it's money of some description, and c) it's open source. Everything else is goobledegook to me.
Mining? Faucetting? What are those when they are at home?
What if I don't want to mine anything or turn on a faucet but I just want to use Bitcoin as a savings account? Is that possible? Is my money save? Do I get persecuted by angry tax people if I save through Bitcoin? What's a Bitcoin worth in the kind of money that the supermarket will accept? The list of questions marching through my head is endless.

I have read a lot of posts on this forum and I'm still in the dark.

Could someone please explain it all to me, preferably in the type of language a five-year-old can understand? I'm not five years old but when it comes to High Finance, I'm a newborn babe.

Cheers!