Thanks for your procedure! I stepped succesfully trough it, only after the programming and verify succesfull, I powertoggled the device, removed the serial and boot stuff and connected it to USB again but still get the device not recognized warning, there are no leds on.
any thoughts?
When the RDP (read protection) option is active, the only command that is allowed is the "Permanent Readout Unprotect" command (which erases all of the Flash).
So while the protection is enabled, it should not be possible to download programs to RAM and run them
edit: found the answer to the protection question