Yes we are all the gosht's of idiots  

Historic me so stupid.  Never did know when I should shut up 

Time is no longer linear and nano telomere modification has stopped the aging process.

Girlfriend?

Now you are just kidding ourselves.  With a head like ours we couldnt even stomach giving ourselves a hand job.

p.s. I can no longer address stupider historic me directly for fear of altering the timeline & good to see you didn't deny the sodomy, admitting it is the first step.

@Intelligentx

I am us from the future.

I have traveled back to tell you to stop acting like a dick and acting all clever, I realize you don't know any better back then due to the inbreeding, genetic defects and retardation.

After 50 years of psychotherapy I have come to realize all our issues stem back to the summer we stayed with uncle bubba in the trailer park when he destroyed our sphincter.

Dont worry though, I have a seat on the time bus and will prevent uncle bubba causing a prolapse and keep us rectally intact.