Win Update removed EFS and Bitlocker from Win 8 Standard?

Am I insane?

Windows 8 Standard (not Pro or Ent)

I had Win8 early, maybe even beta or CTP via MSDN subscription. Anyway, I've been running it since then and have had great luck with it. On day 1 I put bitlocker on my USB drive (yes, it worked) and put EFS on key folders that held security related items. I fully realize that those features were not included in the marketing slide for the Win8 launch, but I always trust marketers as far as I can throw them.

Now fast forward to 2015, all my encrypted folders are now decrypted and my bitlocker drive is still bit-locked, but since I know the PIN I still have access to it.

Support thinks I'm certifiably insane, but I'm certain I enabled EFS and Bitlocker on Windows 8 Standard, while it was likely in beta or CTP. Did Windows update really just yank encryption out.

So my bitlocker drive is proof (not like court of law). I formatted it on day one. I did bitlocker stuff through the manage-bde script so I can never remember if the bitlocker control panel was ever really there (cuz its not now).

So... anyone have some non-win-updated Windows 8 machines to see if EFS and manage-bde work on? I'm less inclined to roll back the last 47 updates.

Hopefully not insane.