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Author Topic: I'm seriously contemplating suicide, why am I telling you lot this?  (Read 929 times)
Mowcore (OP)
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October 11, 2015, 05:46:00 PM
 #1

I guess this is as off topic as it get's.

The older I get , the harder it hurts.
    
      First off, 8 years ago, I started getting these horrible "headaches". Not migraines or what you would think are normal headaches, but mind numbing killing head pains on the right side of my head called Cluster Headaches. Don't let the headache part fool you, I can not simply take a aspirin to get rid of this pain, this condition has been called suicide headache for a reason due to the intense pain that just can not be stopped unless proper treatment is provided. I have been on a cocktail of drugs for the past 8 years that has completely fucked up my life and lost a large portion of my friends and social life.

      It wasn't until last year that I started getting the right treatment I needed. I am on Verapemil, O2 , Topiramate and have Sumatriptan injections which are great for stopping an attack when it happens. Only a handful of the people I know , including family , truly understand the shit I go through for this lifelong none life "threatening" condition. Work is a cunt, all they hear is headache and think I am bullshitting most of the time. Everyday is a fucking drag going into work fucked of my head on meds stopping this chronic pain from making it's appearance, and when it does come at work I always feel guilty of the fact that I have to leave everyone in the shit by going home to suck on my o2 tank while they think I am bulllshitting my self out of work, I need the money, I don't get sick pay or anything!

      My social life is next to none, it's obviously better now I have some form of treatment but I have lost 8 years to this pain that I will never get back, I am 33 and single! I can't put any partner through this bullshit I am going through. It's such a burden for me, imagine what it will be like for them. This is the only reason I got into bitcoin due to having so much time being in so much pain. For the past fuck knows how many years I must of quit and rejoined Facebook well over 200 times due to this very reason, no one gives a shit. And why should they?.

      So what is the point? All I keep thinking about is taking all my meds and being done about it. Everyone is having kids and getting engaged or married, getting promotions and what not, and I'm still the same cunt bitching about me. Surely the world is better off without me, fuck it.

I haven't been that active here for the past year I guess, due to me trying to get my life back. And I guess I am saying this here due to this place being the last place I felt at home at...

I am sorry for saying this, I am sorry for making anyone's day shit by making them read my shitty grammer or horrible words of offence,

I just had to get it off my chest just in case I do something.

And thanks for the experience, I hope it goes well for you all.

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onemorexmr
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October 11, 2015, 06:54:32 PM
 #2

i know how you feel: have been through that. i cant say anything but: best wishes to you!

regarding social life: give it a chance...i dont want to hurt you, but maybe you find one that suffers the same or similar? this has helped me much in the past...

and btw this is the wrong forum. to many sociopathic assholes which only care about money.

XMR || Monero || monerodice.net || xmr.to || mymonero.com || openalias.org || you think bitcoin is fungible? watch this
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October 11, 2015, 07:23:39 PM
 #3

Do you have any hobbies at all to maybe take your mind off of this pain? Ease it a little bit?

If you don't have something that occupies your mind where you can have fun, it's probably a good idea to seek out something that entertains you.

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October 11, 2015, 07:35:05 PM
 #4

Why don't you take up a hobby that interests you ? Write a blog on something that you have a passion for or make a website that explains how truly bad your life is with this affliction and make people understand how this effects your daily life. The more people are aware of this the more people will have an open mind and you will also find others which have the same problem.
Gleb Gamow
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October 11, 2015, 07:46:17 PM
 #5



I knew of a guy who had headaches due to too much gaming and beer. Could this be part of the culprit?
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October 11, 2015, 08:05:05 PM
 #6

I could almost say that suicide is never the answer. Some people always have it worse. While I can not understand the pain that you're feeling too, anything chronic is a huge burden. Even having something that persists for a few weeks can be very annoying and it interferes with your life.
Have you considered surgery? I've read something long ago about blocking the trigeminal nerve. Not sure how effective that is.

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October 11, 2015, 08:21:00 PM
 #7

I know that maybe it's not a real solution, but, what about weed?

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apitico
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October 11, 2015, 08:52:10 PM
 #8

I think you could do Therapy Reiki or even better, Reconection. Google about it if you don't Know what it is. If you never heard about it probably you will think it's a joke, i used to think like that until i used it in a very bad period of my life and it saved me. Give it a chance. Some people with cronic pain get better.

33 years old.....young, there is still a long way to go in your life and if you think positive you will find happyness.

Take care

Give it a chance

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October 11, 2015, 09:21:15 PM
 #9

Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem - remember that.

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October 12, 2015, 04:23:12 AM
 #10

you should start taking mushrooms, they help against cluster headaches

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jv1lG417LKg
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December 19, 2015, 01:06:39 PM
 #11

Hey.

All things good now?  Undecided

It's a kind of blindness that reason alone cannot cure.
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December 19, 2015, 01:25:22 PM
 #12

     So what is the point? All I keep thinking about is taking all my meds and being done about it. Everyone is having kids and getting engaged or married, getting promotions and what not, and I'm still the same cunt bitching about me. Surely the world is better off without me, fuck it.
Visit Thailand or China, you will have a wife in no time.  Try it, you have nothing to lose.


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Spoetnik
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December 19, 2015, 04:46:09 PM
 #13

i know how you feel: have been through that. i cant say anything but: best wishes to you!

regarding social life: give it a chance...i dont want to hurt you, but maybe you find one that suffers the same or similar? this has helped me much in the past...

and btw this is the wrong forum. to many sociopathic assholes which only care about money.

Wow you hypocrite piece of shit..
You got a lot of nerve !

I criticized MONERO (ya like the coin in your name)
so you argued with me about it then when you lost
you went and created a Poll topic to rally everyone around you to bad mouth me.
Then you have the fucking audacity to pretend you didn't do anything.

fuck you and fuck scam coin monero !

FUD first & ask questions later™
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December 19, 2015, 04:50:27 PM
 #14

get you head scanned.. sounds like a tumor etc.

lots of drugs out there too.

FUD first & ask questions later™
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December 19, 2015, 05:08:10 PM
 #15

i know how you feel: have been through that. i cant say anything but: best wishes to you!

regarding social life: give it a chance...i dont want to hurt you, but maybe you find one that suffers the same or similar? this has helped me much in the past...

and btw this is the wrong forum. to many sociopathic assholes which only care about money.

Wow you hypocrite piece of shit..
You got a lot of nerve !

I criticized MONERO (ya like the coin in your name)
so you argued with me about it then when you lost
you went and created a Poll topic to rally everyone around you to bad mouth me.
Then you have the fucking audacity to pretend you didn't do anything.

fuck you and fuck scam coin monero !

i asked you if you want me to close that topic if it offends you and i never bad mouthed you, yet you show up with insults.

XMR || Monero || monerodice.net || xmr.to || mymonero.com || openalias.org || you think bitcoin is fungible? watch this
abhishek.g
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December 19, 2015, 05:35:19 PM
 #16

So what do you want from us ? How can we help you to make you out of this situation ? Anyways, get well soon
cryptodromeda
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December 19, 2015, 06:07:19 PM
 #17

I think he died. It's been two months already.

It's a kind of blindness that reason alone cannot cure.
Mr. Forum
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December 19, 2015, 06:56:10 PM
 #18

I am sorry I know sometimes life may give us more than we can ever think or even imagine. One thing I have always staying knowing in life is the fact that we will always go through difficult situations but they should never be the reason we are down. All we need is to learn from the experience we have gone through and let this prepare us for the global and even bigger thing. I will advice you to stop having the mindset of suicidal relate cases. Go back to the drawing board.
Spoetnik
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December 19, 2015, 10:24:21 PM
 #19

i know how you feel: have been through that. i cant say anything but: best wishes to you!

regarding social life: give it a chance...i dont want to hurt you, but maybe you find one that suffers the same or similar? this has helped me much in the past...

and btw this is the wrong forum. to many sociopathic assholes which only care about money.

Wow you hypocrite piece of shit..
You got a lot of nerve !

I criticized MONERO (ya like the coin in your name)
so you argued with me about it then when you lost
you went and created a Poll topic to rally everyone around you to bad mouth me.
Then you have the fucking audacity to pretend you didn't do anything.

fuck you and fuck scam coin monero !

i asked you if you want me to close that topic if it offends you and i never bad mouthed you, yet you show up with insults.


Nice try my Trolling big mouth game playing friend.
I publicly told you there was already a Poll topic almost identical to the one you said you planned on making.
So i said why not bump that one ?
Nope.. you insisted on making yet ANOTHER topic dedicated to me being a Troll etc.
And everyone knows i am right because they have seen 20 of them in the last couple years.
You are full of shit.
And a cry baby because i criticized your favorite coin.
I also do not recall you offering to close the topic.
Seems you made it for a reason so why play dumb and back peddle now ?

You want to run around Trolling on people man up to it.. don't be a coward.
What kind of childish Trolling brat goes and creates a Poll topic called "[POLL] Do you take what Spoetnik says seriously"
That was intended to be a serious discussion ?
Fuck no.. you were being a little trolling bitch and every single person here knows it.
Maybe i should do the same exact thing back on you now ?
By the way you posted it in the wrong forum section on purpose too Every heard of the reputation section ?.

People that is why you should avoid Monero.
The people involved with it are toxic and cancerous to Crypto.

IF anyone should kill themselves it's these Monero idiots.

FUD first & ask questions later™
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