You my friend are comparing Apples with Carrots, because Bitcoin was never meant to be converted to Fiat currencies and most of the problems are associated with Fiat currency conversion. The moment when Banks gets involved with Bitcoin, things goes south very quickly, because they complicate things.
Bitcoin to Bitcoin transfers using SegWit addresses should never cost $40 in miners fees, so you might have used old legacy addresses.
The amount being transferred has nothing to do with the fees you pay, so that sounds fishy too.
Next time use SegWit addresses and transfer $100 000+ or $1 000 000 and see what the difference is, because large money transfers cost the same, where centralized payment processors charge more for bigger amounts.
We have not even started to include Lightning Network transactions in this scenario, where that same transactions would have cost you a fraction of a cent.