I had my friend, who is a board-certified surgeon, open up my abdomen cavity and place a ziplock bag with my paper wallet inside. It will remain there for 7 years before I must re-do the operation or spend the coins. Please don't find out who I am and cut my open in my sleep. ):
If your serious I think that was the most secure idea until you just said it. I hope you hid your IP. There may be people looking to cut you open.
They could try! But I'm a very dangerous person! Plus, what if my paper wallet only has 3 BTC on it? They'll feel like fools for murdering me then, won't they!
Ha ha ha, I get the last laugh!
P.S.
Actually, a brain wallet is truly the most secure method, if you do it correctly and never get Alzheimer's.