I sometimes think think that folks are arguing very fine distinctions that don't really matter in the end. My general sense is that while not the same, BIP101 and XT are "joined at the hip", and not really separable at this time.
You are spot on with that observation. People like splitting hairs by saying "it's a vote for bigger blocks, not XT" or "it's a vote for BIP 101 not XT" or "any vote for 8MB is a vote for BIP 101" or "any vote for 8MB is a vote for XT"...
All in all it's a load of bullshit. Most pools want bigger blocks
long term, but not BIP 101 nor XT. That is all. The ONLY push for BIP 101 now is the XT client or stripped down XT.