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Author Topic: Thoughts on Marriage?  (Read 3868 times)
Kiritsugu (OP)
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December 20, 2015, 12:47:37 AM
 #1

Before we start this discussion, I would like to point out that this is NOT a discussion about whether you think gay/straight marriages should be allowed or not.

This is a discussion about marriage itself, regardless of genders.

My opinion has always been along the lines of:

Why do I need to legally bind myself (at least that's how it functions in the USA) to someone in order to show my love?  I feel like I should be able to show love to someone just by being a part of their life.  Every relationship is an opportunity to learn something new.  It shouldn't need to involve the law.  I understand there are benefits, such as tax reductions among other things, but I am mostly talking about the show of affection.


Have you ever been married?  Ever been through a divorce?  What's it like?  How does it make you feel?  What are the advantages and disadvantages?  Is it worth it?

Discuss.
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December 20, 2015, 12:49:36 AM
 #2

LOL ...

Fuck marriage.

Will never get married. Smiley

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December 20, 2015, 01:03:15 AM
 #3

LOL ...

Fuck marriage.

Will never get married. Smiley
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December 20, 2015, 01:03:28 AM
 #4

LOL ...

Fuck marriage.

Will never get married. Smiley
Nice avatar micro.
live your life and fuck marriage Grin
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December 20, 2015, 01:05:28 AM
 #5

LOL ...

Fuck marriage.

Will never get married. Smiley

Why not? Marriage is good.  Roll Eyes Roll Eyes

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December 20, 2015, 01:24:32 AM
 #6

If you find your perfect partner why not? Smiley

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December 20, 2015, 01:31:30 AM
 #7

Before we start this discussion, I would like to point out that this is NOT a discussion about whether you think gay/straight marriages should be allowed or not.

This is a discussion about marriage itself, regardless of genders.

My opinion has always been along the lines of:

Why do I need to legally bind myself (at least that's how it functions in the USA) to someone in order to show my love?  I feel like I should be able to show love to someone just by being a part of their life.  Every relationship is an opportunity to learn something new.  It shouldn't need to involve the law.  I understand there are benefits, such as tax reductions among other things, but I am mostly talking about the show of affection.


Have you ever been married?  Ever been through a divorce?  What's it like?  How does it make you feel?  What are the advantages and disadvantages?  Is it worth it?

Discuss.

 Marriage isn't to demonstrate your love and affection.  Your premise is illogical which means that your conclusion is invalid.
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December 20, 2015, 04:08:17 AM
 #8

marriage it is a worst word
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December 20, 2015, 04:42:29 AM
 #9

Fuck marriage Cheesy
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December 20, 2015, 05:51:47 AM
 #10

It can be very difficult, especially if communication is not your strong suit. It can be done successfully, however that is rare.... for good reason.
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December 20, 2015, 05:59:20 AM
 #11

Kourtney and Scott Disick had three children yet never got married.
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December 20, 2015, 06:04:15 AM
 #12

Kourtney and Scott Disick had three children yet never got married.

 Yeah but those are Bieber's kids.
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December 20, 2015, 08:17:14 AM
 #13

Marriage is slavery!

Take a look at this video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_V3c9__Nzqs
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December 20, 2015, 08:37:59 AM
 #14

gave up chicks long ago -- never been married -- sadly i aint into roosters either ;(
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December 20, 2015, 08:54:48 AM
 #15

Why do I need to legally bind myself

my best friends, a couple, and probably the only peeps id call friends, have been together since just after school. 20+ years by now, have two awesome daughters, never got married

the chick used to say: why should I marry just to get divorced?
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December 20, 2015, 04:17:49 PM
 #16

Why do I need to legally bind myself

my best friends, a couple, and probably the only peeps id call friends, have been together since just after school. 20+ years by now, have two awesome daughters, never got married

the chick used to say: why should I marry just to get divorced?

 Statistically speaking they would have had a 50-60% chance of staying together for life had they gotten married and only a 10% chance of staying together as an unmarried couple with children (and only 3% if the children reached 16 years of age!) so it was no mean feat staying together outside of marriage.
 I know a couple who were cohabitating for 18 years and the woman spent over $100k in lawyers fees over custody of the children and division of assets when they split; I don't know how much her partner spent.  The process of disentanglement was no less onerous or costly than it would be for a legally married couple.
 Interestingly, 93% of couples who stay together are married before having their children.
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December 20, 2015, 07:46:25 PM
 #17

I would never go through with a traditional marriage. The idea of being legally bound to someone "forever" (or, having to jump through the hoops to get out when it goes sour) is terrifying to me.
A pagan marriage, sure, as a gesture of (current) commitment and celebration, that can be evaluated and you can choose whether or not to renew/continue. But traditional marriage is absolutely ridiculous. Especially in a day where we view each other as rather replaceable. I wouldn't want to put myself in that position. Don't get me wrong, I love and commit with full intentions of doing everything that I can to make it work; however, I am not so naive as to believe that nothing could go wrong and end us, for the better.
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December 20, 2015, 08:20:41 PM
 #18

Marriage is a covenant that you as a couple usually make with God. It is therefore something that is instituted my the mighty and everlasting father. I do believe that it is something that need total respect and honor because it is a way of worshiping God. marriage itself is also not a bed of roses and you will have to  go through very many challenges as a couple and it is always advisable to have them handled by the two parties.
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December 20, 2015, 08:31:02 PM
 #19

Marriage is a covenant that you as a couple usually make with God. It is therefore something that is instituted my the mighty and everlasting father. I do believe that it is something that need total respect and honor because it is a way of worshiping God. marriage itself is also not a bed of roses and you will have to  go through very many challenges as a couple and it is always advisable to have them handled by the two parties.

Also, that^, is another reason why I think it's ridiculous. Unless believing in that sort of thing floats your boat and you need it to give you meaning and whatnot, then all the power to you.
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January 26, 2016, 04:08:52 PM
 #20

Men has the advantage to not worry about these things yet. We're good until 40. LOL. Just my own thoughts..
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January 26, 2016, 05:40:53 PM
 #21

I want to marriage when i love a boy
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January 27, 2016, 01:34:04 AM
 #22

I want to marriage when i love a boy

Well make sure he really loves you. Marriage is a very big thing. Younger people/kids shouldn't do it IMO!
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January 27, 2016, 10:38:11 AM
 #23

It should be an honest and dignifies process of lovers and not to be taken for granted.

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January 27, 2016, 11:05:04 AM
 #24

Marriage is great but it is definitely a lot of work. Love is the easy part of marriage. You really have to have patience and dedication to make it work. Don't worry about all the statistics out there regarding divorce. Most people just aren't dedicated and are always looking for an easy way out of things. You will know when you are ready
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January 28, 2016, 03:24:12 AM
 #25

Fuck marriage. Never been married and never will be. I've seen what happens to people when it goes wrong and there's no way I'll ever inflict that on myself or anyone else.

Since I was knee high to a grasshopper the idea of staking the roof over your head and your entire financial future on the basis of how another person feels about you struck me as totally deranged. A few more relationships down the line and I've seen at first hand how quickly feelings change and how coldly you can be discarded.

Marriage started out as a straightforward contract. Romantic love was a very late arrival on the scene and it's completely scrambled everything, not that marriage for practical reasons would be any more fun.
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January 28, 2016, 08:55:50 AM
 #26

Marriage : we must prepare anything ; financial, heart, faith and maturity
Its all about gaining responsibility throughout the family live

I'm single btw  Grin
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January 28, 2016, 10:53:31 AM
 #27

Marriage : we must prepare anything ; financial, heart, faith and maturity
Its all about gaining responsibility throughout the family live

I'm single btw  Grin

Same here, I am single too, marriage involves great level of responsibility and maturity and also involves risk if you dont find a good partner.
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January 28, 2016, 10:59:50 AM
 #28

Marriage is a system made by our old people, because marriage is a security for the men and women.
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January 28, 2016, 01:22:09 PM
 #29

I'm single and I think marriage is unnecessary. At least for me...

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January 28, 2016, 02:41:04 PM
 #30

Marriage is traditional thing and everyone has follow it, but nowadays I don't see any respect that partners have for each other which was in older days, So it is better not to ruin our life by getting married.

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January 28, 2016, 03:27:45 PM
 #31

Marriage is good. Family security. You never have to go home alone. It does take a lot of work though. BE SURE

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February 02, 2016, 11:33:21 AM
 #32

I was divorced two times, so have experience with that. I won't say that I won't marry again but first you must be very sure to enter this and to know and live with person you wanna marry to. Always real face of other person you see when come time to divorce.
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February 02, 2016, 12:55:34 PM
 #33

Who can honestly say that they can ever truly know another person?  Anything can set someone else off.

A friend of mine was with someone from when he was 16 to 38. He had a bit of a non violent funny turn. Instead of supporting him she turned around and did everything within her power to destroy him. Now he lives with his grandma and has a criminal record to show for it too after spurious charges stuck.

No doubt she was scared shitless but after all that time you'd expect the person you're closest to to at least show a little understanding rather than try to dispose of you when times get hard.
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February 02, 2016, 03:04:59 PM
 #34

Marriage? Stay away..
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February 02, 2016, 03:27:36 PM
 #35

Its a needed thing in life , so we all supposed to married
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February 02, 2016, 03:50:48 PM
 #36

I'm married, have been for almost 8 years. I've been with her for another 10 on top (we got married on our 10 year anniversary). I think I am very lucky, I have found someone who accepts me, flaws and all, and who still wants to be with me for 18 years and who I adore. There have been times when things have been tough and we have fought for what feels like months on end, but since getting married it has been pretty much plain sailing, and we are happier now than at any period previously.

I think getting married has shown my wife that I am committed to her and our relationship in a way that 10 years together never could. I think she felt that I could leave at any time without consequences before we were married and that fuelled her anxiety. But making the commitment in front of our friends and family (and God I suppose) cemented to her just how I felt about her.

I believe that people should not get married unless they are sure they are with the right person and have been together for long enough time for there to have been downright horrible times, that way you know that the person you are with are in it and into you for the long haul.

It is too easy to get with someone and find yourself carried away on the new relationship highs to not think about what would happen if the relationship hits a rocky patch.

tldr; marriage rocks - but only if you've already put in the time and got through at least one major rocky spell to know you'll last.

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February 03, 2016, 11:16:02 PM
 #37

Great ! When you find a person that is not always trying to change you Wink
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February 04, 2016, 12:11:55 AM
 #38

Marriage is beautifull when you have right person, and its much more than simple paper...when you are really happy and know person you are with

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February 04, 2016, 08:49:18 AM
 #39


Marriage???

Let it be, let it be... let it be, yeah, let it be
Whisper words of wisdom
Let it be!!!

  It's me!!!
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February 04, 2016, 08:54:17 AM
 #40

Guess it's the idea of being fully committed to each other. We really need to take seriously this 'for better or worse' thing.
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February 04, 2016, 10:55:29 AM
 #41

You don't really need it. The most important is to find your "true match" and whether you'll be married or not is not so important. Your true love and commitment only counts.

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February 04, 2016, 11:22:31 AM
 #42

The high divorce figures don't seem to be putting people off marriage.

So what makes a good marriage? Faithfulness comes out top of the list.

Of course, you need to have a steady income.
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February 08, 2016, 05:28:41 AM
 #43

So what makes a good marriage? Faithfulness comes out top of the list.

Of course, you need to have a steady income.

What else makes a good marriage?

I'd say these are the most important qualities:

  • Compromise - it's a partnership so you have to ensure that it's not all about what you want, sometimes you'll have to watch the shitty rom-com movie
  • Communication - it's important to speak to your partner, if there's sometime not right speak to them about it - also listen if they say something is not right
  • Respect - you have to have respect for your partner, so no little lies or secrets because if they're found out it leads to distrust
  • Enjoy your time together - it is important to do things together that you'll both enjoy, this builds shared experiences and memories and increases 'the good times'
  • Freedom - it is important for both partners to have their own interests away from the other person this gives you the ability to grow and develop

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February 08, 2016, 05:55:24 AM
 #44

Think we are in a time where women can work and religion dictates life a tad less.
That said the courts have not caught up to balance the new aspects. Marriage for me is up to my mate and if we have kids. Otherwise I see it as a out of date concept.

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February 08, 2016, 09:25:24 AM
 #45

marriage is very important to complete your half with your soulmate then after we have something called "FAMILY" this is the beauty of life don't miss it. Smiley Kiss
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February 08, 2016, 03:31:45 PM
 #46

Marriage is a good thing when you found "right" person... If you spend good time with her/him you can marry and live together forever!..
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February 08, 2016, 03:34:04 PM
 #47

Since i got married, it completes all the mising part of my life. especially when you have your own child and watch them grow. Marriage is both happiness and bitterness


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February 08, 2016, 05:11:54 PM
 #48

Since i got married, it completes all the mising part of my life. especially when you have your own child and watch them grow. Marriage is both happiness and bitterness
You can have most of these things without marriage, there are points where being married is better though. Financial reasons mostly, see this changing due to gay marriage. Its helped reopen the fight for those not married but living together to get similar rights.
We have evolved enough to slowly move away from needing marriage. Evolution has changed this aspect. To think the head of a penis was not built for pleasure but to pull the other dudes juices out.
When you think about that you know times have changed. Sorry for gross image.

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February 08, 2016, 06:15:29 PM
 #49

marriage is a scheme for keeping the hot ass you found  Grin

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February 12, 2016, 09:34:46 AM
 #50

 A bondage of life which can lead your life in a secure and fashionable way.

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February 12, 2016, 05:42:57 PM
 #51

Please ignore the crappy grammar, tense, run-on sentences, etc… and the excessive use of “etc…” Also this is generally speaking of heterosexual couples not homosexual. Some might apply to both.
Women see marriage differently and it is important to look as a male at the female perspective. She is 50% of the equation. Based on the statement “Bind myself” makes me think that you are male. In general females to do not think of marriage as “binding”. I am speaking generally here not implying that all women think this way, but a majority would agree. Marriage, to women, is a bonding of two individuals to become better as a couple. The marriage part is a bond that women feel hammers the nail home in their mind that this partner is going to commit their resources. Marriages between two is about sharing life AKA resources together. When I say resources I mean time, money, affection, child rearing, etc… Love may or may not be involved. Love is dynamic and is very complex to define. Everyone has different views. Finding someone that has similar views to love makes the relationship easier. I’m going to leave love out of this for the most part even through females might argue that it is more important. In my and perhaps most male’s minds the view below would make more sense then the generic “All you need is love” romantic viewpoint.

I tend to agree as a male that my life would feel no different married or not; however, the other side, female side would likely disagree. Most females would feel a sense of panic or urgency to get married. This feeling females have is not entirely based on trends in America, which are swinging towards not getting married anyway, but the primal sense, in simple terms, “I need a mate to reproduce with.” Expanding on this, humans have a long gestation period (9 months), and females cannot fend for themselves during this period or could not in the early days of human existence. They required protection, support, sustenance, etc… to survive AKA resources. Also, once the child is born it takes nearly 9-10 years before the child is able to survive on his/her own (debatable, point is it takes a while). During this time the female requires additional support given mostly by males in terms of food, protection, etc…

So without getting into relationships and what’s expected once you are married, the main point is that marriage is likely to be more important to the female than the male. Your view might be leaning to never get married, but the female view likely leans more towards getting married on a primal level. So if you indicate or outright say to a potential mate “I never want to get married” it is likely the same as “I never want kids” which goes against the primal urge of most females. Females have the urge at some point in their life to reproduce and the step before that is to secure a mate with resources to support that process. That step is marriage.
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February 12, 2016, 06:35:13 PM
 #52

Marriage? Stay away..
Now you can stay away from this but end of the day You have too.... get marry other wise your half life is no meaning i think.
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February 12, 2016, 07:32:24 PM
 #53

I always wanted a happy family and a wife. One could say this is my dream. I am lucky enough to have found a girl that thinks the same. We have been together for several years now and already talked about marriage. Her parents are very conservative in this question, so that is an advantage for me i think. Before we have children i want to ask her if she wants to be my wife. I am just waiting for the right moment to ask her and hopefully she will say yes.
To all the people who said things like "fuck marriage, i'll never be married" i would like to say: never say never. Maybe you get lucky and find someone that you truly love and then want to marry that person. Things can change, i agree but as others said, marriage is about compromise commitment and communication...

There were some good responses i wanted to quote, but i will only quote the first that came to my mind:
Marriage is beautifull when you have right person, and its much more than simple paper...when you are really happy and know person you are with
+1

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February 12, 2016, 08:07:35 PM
 #54

If you are committed,  then why not marry that person... Marriage is a good thing. It unites two people...
A relationship without marriage and in some cases having a baby is not a good thing...

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February 12, 2016, 08:09:44 PM
 #55

Don't think about this..Enjoy life till you can. Grin
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February 12, 2016, 08:18:20 PM
 #56

I want to marriage  Cheesy
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February 13, 2016, 02:35:58 AM
 #57

More than anything, "marriage" has become a status, than a symbol. Every woman wants it as proof of love, and sincerity as if to reassure they can permanently be with that person regardless of what happens. It's their security.
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February 13, 2016, 03:45:34 AM
 #58

AS long as no one is violated then its ok. A good image should be maintained
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February 13, 2016, 02:22:07 PM
 #59

AS long as no one is violated then its ok. A good image should be maintained

A good "image" does not necessarily convey a healthy marriage. In fact, most people that do get divorced, are normally people that appear happy, content, and have zero relationship issues.
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February 14, 2016, 04:57:10 PM
 #60

Before we start this discussion, I would like to point out that this is NOT a discussion about whether you think gay/straight marriages should be allowed or not.

This is a discussion about marriage itself, regardless of genders.

My opinion has always been along the lines of:

Why do I need to legally bind myself (at least that's how it functions in the USA) to someone in order to show my love?  I feel like I should be able to show love to someone just by being a part of their life.  Every relationship is an opportunity to learn something new.  It shouldn't need to involve the law.  I understand there are benefits, such as tax reductions among other things, but I am mostly talking about the show of affection.


Have you ever been married?  Ever been through a divorce?  What's it like?  How does it make you feel?  What are the advantages and disadvantages?  Is it worth it?

Discuss.
so,do you think marriage is not too important to make your relationship admitted?i just think marriage is the most complete relationship,maybe because i am asian guy,and i am moslem,and now i just try to make sure that one girl able too complete my life and really want to life with me for ever.
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February 14, 2016, 04:59:04 PM
 #61

Marriages are waste one. Enjoy being single.
why sir?is single can give you real love,love between human,love who create and grow without birth bond,just like you meet people and than you really want to life together with him.
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February 14, 2016, 06:10:23 PM
 #62

Marriages are waste one. Enjoy being single.

Maybe youre still very young to say that, i married at 27 and i already enjoy being single for the past 26 years


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February 14, 2016, 06:30:07 PM
 #63

Lets say we strip the religious ramifications out of marriage,there are benefits to being married like tax purposes.
Have also heard of people running into issues that where not married when one dies,this can be a headache especially if one was married before the coupling.

Its not a important aspect for me to be married but I think if the person I am with wanted it bad enough,I would be willing to proceed.
Guess it all depends on how real the relationship is,if she is after my money( Grin Grin Grin Grin) she will be disappointed.

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February 14, 2016, 08:25:56 PM
 #64

Why get married? If you can liv common law, why not? being married is too expensive for both involved. Especially if it doesn't work out  Embarrassed

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February 18, 2016, 06:04:01 PM
 #65

If you love someone enough that you want to spend the rest of your life with them, you get married, its just what you do and what people have always done. Whether it is the same gender or not shouldn't matter aslong as the love is  real

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February 26, 2016, 01:36:47 PM
 #66

marriage is beautiful thing of life, mad person can't marriage.
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February 26, 2016, 06:31:09 PM
 #67

i rather cut those myself  Cool

its not a matter of if
its a matter of when
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February 27, 2016, 05:12:02 PM
 #68

After 50 I might get married if I found the one and only.

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February 27, 2016, 06:39:45 PM
 #69

I am thinking to get marry this year end already girl is there being single life is super but dont know how married life will be so can any one share there married life?
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February 28, 2016, 12:05:23 AM
 #70

Yes , every one have the right to marry , lol
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February 28, 2016, 12:10:14 AM
 #71

Im planning to get married this year, wish me luck guys Grin
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February 28, 2016, 12:24:24 AM
 #72

when the true time come and when we find true person marrige life is good i think
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February 29, 2016, 10:50:07 AM
 #73

I plan to get married in a few years.... It's not that important for me but it is for her.
That way she'll get the same family name as our child.

And also... because I love her.
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March 01, 2016, 10:55:59 AM
 #74

I've been happily married for 10 years and it's great, I did find a pic of my wife in her wedding underwear which was taken by the male wedding photographer in the morning that she never mentioned a couple of years ago  Huh
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March 01, 2016, 12:47:38 PM
 #75

I am married since 2008 and it is not bad so far. It has lots of pros, somethimes it gets annoying but as long as you can manage it its ok Smiley
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March 01, 2016, 12:54:37 PM
 #76

I believe so that marriage is a divine law of God for this is a vow that you gave to your partner for the rest of your life. This is also a traditional way for saying that love was bound beyond everything you offer for having your partner. The acceptance of your partner and its family.If couples are happy without any marriages I don't have any doubts on it as long as they love each other that's all that matters..

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March 01, 2016, 01:10:34 PM
 #77

I am married since 2008 and it is not bad so far. It has lots of pros, somethimes it gets annoying but as long as you can manage it its ok Smiley

yeah thats true, its great to be married ,but you dont have the freedom anymore to be wild and hang out at night with frnds, i do have that freedom but my friends are married too .  Undecided
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March 01, 2016, 01:16:01 PM
 #78

Thats the point! As long as you can still do most of things you made before marriage it is great (include making fun with friends).
The problem is that women try their best to change something in us Tongue
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April 04, 2016, 03:24:56 PM
 #79

official relations is complete nonsense it is better to be free from this garbage
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April 04, 2016, 05:26:43 PM
 #80

Those who wanna get married will have their own reasons and those who dont will have their own. Finally it will be your choice to go for it or not.
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April 05, 2016, 10:30:01 AM
 #81

Marriage was great! Now after divorce its even better!
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April 05, 2016, 03:36:10 PM
 #82

Ive been married for 6 years now and i can say i dont have any regrets. if you love someone you can really prove your love by marrying her. Being married means having a companion in everything.

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.PLAY2EARN.RUNNER.GAME.
||VIRAL
REF.SYSTEM
GAME
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