Someone related to the US government is bagholding ETH

My theory on the recent happenings regarding the SEC and Ethereum (the SEC just claimed that Ethereum doesn't meet the requeriments for it to be labeled a security) is that they are bagholding leveraged bags of ETH.

The fact that they give Vitalik a pass and the fact that he has been meeting with certain people in power leads me to believe that someone had vested interests in not labeling this shitcoin a security in order to not pop the bubble. As we know, no one is using ETH other than to issue other tokens (most being scams) and therefore it's utility part is insanely questionable, that coupled with ETH being launched as an ICO money grab meets the requeriments for it being a security but they came out with some bullshit excuses to not do so. This validates my theory and maybe makes it a good buy for the time being.

We all know the only non security token is Bitcoin but if they want to pump ETH then we might as well profit from the bubble and make more BTC along the way.