Fun with Bitcoin (Jokes) - I give merit to new jokes, please contribute

[djefes]

Lets have some fun  

-Where does an Eskimo keep his Bitcoins?
-In a cold wallet (thanks to Ann1989)

-Why does Superman hate trading Bitcoin after 7pm?
-Because it's Crypto-night

-Why do bitcoin investors want a Lambo?
-Because they know Ferarri is owned by Fiat

-A boy asked his bitcoin-investing dad for 1 bitcoin for his birthday.
-Dad: What? $15,554??? $14,354 is a lot of money! What do you need $16,782 for anyway?
This one is updated thanks to leea-1334 :It is a famous "joke" made on Twitter by some crypto influencer called Ran NeuNer. I think he does a TV show. This is the original Tweet: https://twitter.com/cryptomanran/status/939165804809027585?lang=en And he made a right prediction after that for 10k BTC;)

-How do you eat a bitcoin?
-With a megabyte.

-How do you make a small fortune from investing in Bitcoin?
-Start off by investing a large fortune in Bitcoin.


-This new digital currency is bitc*in!
-Sorry. Bitcoin. It’s called bitcoin

-A boy asked his bitcoin-investing dad for 1 bitcoin for his birthday
-Dad: What? $6,244??? $5,354 is a lot of money! What do you need $3,782 for anyway?

-A Bitcoin trader walks into a bar
He walks up to the bar, orders a whiskey, pays the bartender one bitcoin and says, "By this time tomorrow it might be worth a million bucks!"
-The bartender pours him a glass of water and says, "By this time tomorrow it might be Scotch."

-When the sun sets every evening, Superman moves all his Bitcoin investments into a regular mutual fund.
-He tries to protect himself from Crypto night.

-Hey girl are you Bitcoin?
-Because you look like you’re about to crash and I’ll get screwed

-I treat my girlfriend just like my bitcoin
-I never pull out.

-What do you call a Bitcoin that lost weight?
-a lite coin

-Interviewer: How did you become a Bitcoin millionare
-Bitcoin Millionare: ...bit by bit...

-What do you call someone with no bitcoin?
-a bit poor.

-Do you think I should get on bitcoin now ? It's at 0.5$.
-Sent via Internet Explorer.

-With all the money I made with Bitcoin I know exactly what I'm going to spend it on...
-...my internet bill.

-Tom Brady said he refuses to invest in bitcoin.
-Turns out he's afraid of inflation.

-Me: "Yea, I know man. I can't believe it's risen 1500%
-My professor stops writing on the chalkboard and turns around. "Nothing that raises 1500% that quickly is a good investment. I'm so tired of hearing about Bitcoin this Bitcoin that"
-Me: We were talking about the cost of College tuition since 1990

-Future rap name: 50 Bitcoin

-Why do hipsters have so much money?
-Because they bought bitcoin before it was popular

-If I had a penny for every crashing crypto,
-I would have a bitcoin.

Source: https://upjoke.com/bitcoin-jokes

- I invested in crypto and now I'm a millionaire!
- I was a billionaire before.. (posted by Bitcoin_bullish)















above picture are from: https://cryptonews.com/exclusives/20-crypto-jokes-to-brighten-the-bear-run-2136.htm


picture above is from maxreish




Above three is from kryptqnick and he made these himself
















These 6 memes are posted by EdvinZ


NotATether got some jokes for you which he thinks will crack you up:

- What do you call a bitcoin player who died in a video game?
- Rekt.

- Where do bitcoin holders drive to after buying a Lambo?
- To the moon

- Why don't ICOs grow up?
- Because they keep exit scamming when they're little.

- What do you call a coin that keeps getting delisted?
- A DeGibyte.

- Why do people still take part in fake Ethereum giveaways?
- Because ethereum is just an anagram of here mute.

- Why are you supposed to use a hardware wallet?
- Because it's so hard to break.

- Why don't billionaires like bitcoin?
- They don't want you to see how much is in their wallet.

- Why was it necessary to mine the Genesis block?
- To make the mining difficulty higher for Klingons.

- Mt.Gox: We are closing down. We have lost 750,000 of our customers' bitcoins and around 100,000 of our own bitcoins.
- Customers: You just lost 7% of all the bitcoins!
- Mt.Gox:


Ponzi schemes when they want to steal your money:


Traders who bought bitcoin cash at $4000:


Bitcoin HODLers:




Whenever I enter the Bitcoin market during the bull run, somewhere... someone...




Please write your own jokes below

[1713560408]

1713560408

[Tonteus]

Not bad, but not really funny.

[Pearls Before Swine]

-A boy asked his bitcoin-investing dad for 1 bitcoin for his birthday
-Dad: What? $6,244??? $5,354 is a lot of money! What do you need $3,782 for anyway?

*Smacks head*

That's a take off on another joke, one that I can't remember exactly, but I think it's an old jew joke and it isn't funny anyway.  I applaud the spirit of this thread, but these jokes are juvenile.  Unfortunately I don't have any of my own to contribute, tho I would like to hear some...but only if they're *good* ones.  Bad jokes make me feel like I'm losing my sense of humor.

-If I had a penny for every crashing crypto,
-I would have a bitcoin.

Not even close to being funny.  I'm not even sure this is a joke.

[zviadits]

- I don’t have money to buy Bitcoin, what should I do?
- lol How can a person who has two kidneys say that he has no money?

[HeRetiK]

2017 called, they want their crypto jokes back.

...and their bull market.






How about this one:

- A man enters a bar and attempts to double-spend his bitcoins.
- A man enters a bar and attempts to double-spend his bitcoins.

[ray_saeed]

"When I'm very very depressed, I sent 0.02btc to Bitmex and 100x long just to feel something."

https://twitter.com/TheCryptoDog/status/1191605069738913793

[Kprawn]

What do you call a jealous Bitcoin hater? - Answer : Roger Ver.

Who is Satoshi Nakamoto? - Craig Wright <--- This one cracked me up.  

How do you become a Bitcoin Millionaire? - Answer : Buy a million dollar worth of bitcoins.  

How does a Bitcoin millionaire lose there Millionaire status? Answer : Buy a million dollar worth of bitcoins and wait 10 seconds.  

Why did the Bitcoin Whale drown in his own debt? Answer - He could not swim.  

Hope this made someone smile.  

[bounceback]

Please write your own jokes below

this doesn't seem like a joke because I'm not too entertained with your threads but I appreciate what you write here, I think it's a question that we often hear in some media and I personally first asked my friend to teach me bitcoin also asked questions stupid like that. Friend: Why do you want to learn about bitcoin? me: because my girlfriend invites marriage

[Doell]

What do you call a jealous Bitcoin hater? - Answer : Roger Ver.

Who is Satoshi Nakamoto - Craig Wright <--- This one cracked me up. 

Hope this made someone smile. 

do you know sir I fly fell down the stairs of the restaurant while read this on my cellphone ,until someone said to me "you must use eyes for walking" the more laughing holding the stomach of I say "eyes to see LoL not to walk" Roger Ver and Craig Wright That's the part I like

bitcoin says to one of altcoin "you will not be able to catch up with me because you are an alternative coin" hit your forehead if it's not funny

[thirdprize]

My comic called "The Nurbs".  It has a bitcoin story arc at the moment.  Check my other posts for more details.

https://thenurbs.xyz/Home/ShowComic?comicno=124

[Chrystora123]

Please write your own jokes below

Playboy; Hi girl.. is your dad a Bitcoin trader?
Nerdy girl; yes, right, how do you know that?
Playboy; because I see your father's head is round and bald like a coin
Nerdy girl; slap.. go you damn
Playboy; krik..krik..krik

a bad joke   

[Casdinyard]

Playboy; Hi girl.. is your dad a Bitcoin trader?
Nerdy girl; yes, right, how do you know that?
Playboy; because I see your father's head is round and bald like a coin
Nerdy girl; slap.. go you damn
Playboy; krik..krik..krik

a bad joke   

HAHAHA! And it's more like an INSULT.

-If I had a penny for every crashing crypto,
-I would have a bitcoin.

Not even close to being funny.  I'm not even sure this is a joke.

That's a joke from a depressed and broke trader. Lol!
Didn't find it funny, maybe because we're reading it? No. But I found some WITTY. I'm sure some really thought that many times.

[Kakmakr]

A little boy, let's call him Bobby, frequently have sleepovers at a friends <Mikey> house and he is puzzled with the food that are prepared with every visit. This is the discussion between the little boy and his friend.

#Bobby = Mikey, What is up with the food situation at your house?

#Mikey = Hugh? What do you mean?

#Bobby = Well, last night we had steak and chips and pudding for dinner and this morning we had 1 egg and water and now we have 2 slices of bread with water again for lunch?

#Mikey = Oh, yea... My mother hates cooking, so she orders food from a local restaurant. She has an arrangement with the restaurant to pay with bitcoins.

#Bobby = Ok, but what does that has to do with anything?

#Mikey = Hey.... you got to get with the program,  the Bitcoin price fell with over 40% since last night.. It is bread and water, until it recovers for Dinner tonight.  

[peter0425]

I don't have something to share but seriously i will donate a thousand laughs on this thread  hahahaha

Will check this day after.day for good vibes and positive bitcoin  investing

Those other jokes has been released before but still funny until now lol

[djefes]

pictures are added

[djefes]

Is this topic not belong here? I created it on offtopic section but noone reads it there

[EdvinZ]

  Very cool jokes, but I think the third joke should sound a little different.
A son asked his Bitcoin-investing father for $20.00 worth of Bitcoin currency.
— Father: $10.00? What do you need $5.00 for?  

[jootn2kx]

Lets have some fun  

-Why does Superman hate trading Bitcoin after 7pm?
-Because it's Crypto-night

-Why do bitcoin investors want a Lambo?
-Because they know Ferarri is owned by Fiat

-A boy asked his Bitcoin-investing dad...
...for $10.00 worth of Bitcoin currency.
-Dad: $9.67? What do you need $10.32 for?

-How do you eat a bitcoin?
-With a megabyte.

-How do you make a small fortune from investing in Bitcoin?
-Start off by investing a large fortune in Bitcoin.

-This new digital currency is bitc*in!
-Sorry. Bitcoin. It’s called bitcoin

-A boy asked his bitcoin-investing dad for 1 bitcoin for his birthday
-Dad: What? $6,244??? $5,354 is a lot of money! What do you need $3,782 for anyway?

-A Bitcoin trader walks into a bar
He walks up to the bar, orders a whiskey, pays the bartender one bitcoin and says, "By this time tomorrow it might be worth a million bucks!"
-The bartender pours him a glass of water and says, "By this time tomorrow it might be Scotch."

-When the sun sets every evening, Superman moves all his Bitcoin investments into a regular mutual fund.
-He tries to protect himself from Crypto night.

-Hey girl are you Bitcoin?
-Because you look like you’re about to crash and I’ll get screwed

-I treat my girlfriend just like my bitcoin
-I never pull out.

-What do you call a Bitcoin that lost weight?
-a lite coin

-Interviewer: How did you become a Bitcoin millionare
-Bitcoin Millionare: ...bit by bit...

-What do you call someone with no bitcoin?
-a bit poor.

-Do you think I should get on bitcoin now ? It's at 0.5$.
-Sent via Internet Explorer.

-With all the money I made with Bitcoin I know exactly what I'm going to spend it on...
-...my internet bill.

-Tom Brady said he refuses to invest in bitcoin.
-Turns out he's afraid of inflation.

-Me: "Yea, I know man. I can't believe it's risen 1500%
-My professor stops writing on the chalkboard and turns around. "Nothing that raises 1500% that quickly is a good investment. I'm so tired of hearing about Bitcoin this Bitcoin that"
-Me: We were talking about the cost of College tuition since 1990

-Future rap name: 50 Bitcoin

-Why do hipsters have so much money?
-Because they bought bitcoin before it was popular

-If I had a penny for every crashing crypto,
-I would have a bitcoin.

Source: https://upjoke.com/bitcoin-jokes
















above picture are from: https://cryptonews.com/exclusives/20-crypto-jokes-to-brighten-the-bear-run-2136.htm

Please write your own jokes below

Well, to be honest, these are not exactly hilarious, but I've never run into crypto jokes before, so I did enjoy them.

[leea-1334]

Very cool jokes, but I think the third joke should sound a little different.
A son asked his Bitcoin-investing father for $20.00 worth of Bitcoin currency.
— Father: $10.00? What do you need $5.00 for?  

The joke does not need to sound different,,, or structured differently, it is a famous "joke" made on Twitter by some crypto influencer called Ran NeuNer. I think he does a TV show. This is the original Tweet: https://twitter.com/cryptomanran/status/939165804809027585?lang=en

"A boy asked his bitcoin-investing dad for 1 bitcoin for his birthday.

Dad: What? $15,554??? $14,354 is a lot of money! What do you need $16,782 for anyway?"

And he made a right prediction after that for 10k BTC;)

[djefes]

Very cool jokes, but I think the third joke should sound a little different.
A son asked his Bitcoin-investing father for $20.00 worth of Bitcoin currency.
— Father: $10.00? What do you need $5.00 for?  

The joke does not need to sound different,,, or structured differently, it is a famous "joke" made on Twitter by some crypto influencer called Ran NeuNer. I think he does a TV show. This is the original Tweet: https://twitter.com/cryptomanran/status/939165804809027585?lang=en

"A boy asked his bitcoin-investing dad for 1 bitcoin for his birthday.

Dad: What? $15,554??? $14,354 is a lot of money! What do you need $16,782 for anyway?"

And he made a right prediction after that for 10k BTC;)

I have edited that one. Thank you