Gambling is Addictive...Pay Attention to your Gambling Habit!!!

[Fivestar4everMVP]

Greetings to ya all

First, am not a gambler, I ones was but didn't play for long, but i have many friends who are into it and it's because of one of them I quit gambling (not quit like never play again, but quit like I no longer play it frequently like before).

I have this friend named Bassey, he needs help, his problem is that he's addicted to gambling, we both work in the same company, but when you see this guy, he looks so homeless, he's gone out of style, he no longer dresses well, feed well, sleep well, he's always looking like he's sick every minute of the day.

Our salaries are ways paid on the 28th of every month, but before 5th of the next month, Bassey is already out of cash and asking me to lend him some money so he could feed till he gets his next salary,
At first, I didnt know what was going on, cus we are both young and married, i always wondered what he uses all his money for cus both of our wife's are working too.

After asking him severally without an answer, he called me one day and opened up to me that he feels like he's loosing his mind, i asked him how, he said he's addicted to gambling, betting on football, horse and dog races, he siad that he doesn't keep money without ending up gambling with it, that the temptation is just irresistible, it has gotten so bad that when ever he's out of cash to play, is either he ask me to lend him or he goes and withdraw money from his wife's account without her permission, the woman complained and complained, got tired, took their only son and left him alone.

Sometimes, I have the feeling that maybe my friend is cursed, but sincerely, I can't say for sure, I personally used to gamble like three to four times in a week, but after I discovered what my friend is going through, I reduced to once or twice in a month, I no longer gamble for money, I gamble whenever I feel like throwing some money away for fun, and if in the process I win, I never let that win over cloud my sense of reasoning, this is different with Bassey, if he plays and wins, he still ends up spending every penny of his winnings on betting on other games on that very spot right there, good thing that with my help, he trying his best to break free from the habit.

So am urging everyone out there playing to play, but try not to make it a lifestyle, try to always play with only money youve decided to loose, play for the fun and don't expect anything back... Play and don't get addicted.

[robelneo]

Sometimes, I have the feeling that maybe my friend is cursed, but sincerely, I can't say for sure, I personally used to gamble like three to four times in a week, but after I discovered what my friend is going through, I reduced to once or twice in a month, I no longer gamble for money, I gamble whenever I feel like throwing some money away for fun, and if in the process I win, I never that win over cloud my sense of reasoning, this is different with Bassey, if he plays and wins, he still ends up spending every penny of his winnings on betting on other games on that very spot right there, good thing that with my help, he trying his best to break free from the habit.

So am urging everyone out there playing to play, but try not to make it a lifestyle, try to always play with only money youve decided to loose, play for the fun and don't expect anything back... Play and don't get addicted.

Your friend is not cursed he is just strayed and needs guidance on how to control his gambling habit, this is not an isolated case, many or most of the gamblers are like this, one time or another we lose control, we keep saying that we will allocate time and funds but we keep adding time money until we realized that we have nothing left

The cycle continues and we keep justifying that we will be better next time, your friend need help or he will lose everything, it's ok to lose money but not control of your life.

[peter0425]

I can feel your friend because i almost lost my family also because of gambling but Lucky that My wife is strong and have still faith on me that i will change
and return to what we are before we got married many years ago.
She did Not leave me even though i did worst than your Friend,Maybe because I did not still money from her but everything i done is more .

I hope eventually Your friend will recover just like what i did,because now i can proudly say that I am gambling free,not to the extent that i will never play or Bet but "from the desire of Playing To win" Because Now i only play for Fun and stress relieving .

Your friend is not cursed he is just strayed and needs guidance on how to control his gambling habit, this is not an isolated case, many or most of the gamblers are like this, one time or another we lose control, we keep saying that we will allocate time and funds but we keep adding time money until we realized that we have nothing left

The cycle continues and we keep justifying that we will be better next time, your friend need help or he will lose everything, it's ok to lose money but not control of your life.

The Problem is the best person that can help Him leaved him already,and that is His wife.

Maybe OP is much concern so Please don't leave your friend and Help Him realize what is going on and what is coming,i am sure if He did not change the next
 that will leave him is the JOB and this is more worst/

[Ucy]

Betting for fun could aswell get your friend addicted again, and not just greed or his attachment to the huge prizes. If there is nowhere else he could derive fun, he could keep betting just to have fun and "waste money". I'd rather advice him to quit gambling altogether and instead learn to be profitable/successful bettors.

try to always play with only money youve decided to loose,

I guess you mean 'bet with little amount or amount you can afford to lose"? I think if you do this, you are no longer taking big risk which is Gambling (and as long as you betting on good/safe games). You are betting responsibly and not gambling. It's irresponsible to gamble.

But you said you are not a gambler and still say you gamble(that's abit contradictory)... I guess that means you still take huge bet risk, even in once in a month/awhile basis?

[crwth]

What gamblers should know that if they get addicted, it's not only them that is affected, but everyone around them. When it's all about financial stuff, it's going to be affecting everyone and it would affect your health, relationships, responsibilities, etc. I think you should help him in a way that you can and not telling him that he is cursed.

Great way dodging that "gambling" bullet that you fired, OP. Lol 

First, am not a gambler

[Fivestar4everMVP]

Betting for fun could aswell get your friend addicted again, and not just greed or his attachment to the huge prizes. If there is nowhere else he could derive fun, he could keep betting just to have fun and "waste money". I'd rather advice him to quit gambling altogether and instead learn to be profitable/successful bettors.

try to always play with only money youve decided to loose,

I guess you mean 'bet with little amount or amount you afford to lose"? I think if you do this you are no longer taking big risk which is Gambling (and as long as you betting on good/safe games). You are betting responsibly and not gambling. It's irresponsible to gamble.

But you said you are not a gambler and still say you gamble(that's abit contradictory)... I guess that means you still take huge bet risk, even in once in a month/awhile basis?

when I sald am not a gambler, and still say I gamble, I actually meant am not really what should be considered a gambler, and yes, I do place bet ones or twice every month, I personally don't know what you consider as huge risk but for me, i dont take huge risk, my bets is usually between 5 to 10 usd, 10 usd is a threshold I set for my self and ever since I did, I've never crossed it, and am glad cus when I was fully into gambling, I sometimes spend up to 100 usd in a week and still end up winning nothing, am glad I was able to easily pull my self out early cus if I had let it eat deep into me, maybe I would have been worst than my friend is right now, and we both would have no one to help us get out.

What gamblers should know that if they get addicted, it's not only them that is affected, but everyone around them. When it's all about financial stuff, it's going to be affecting everyone and it would affect your health, relationships, responsibilities, etc. I think you should help him in a way that you can and not telling him that he is cursed.

Great way dodging that "gambling" bullet that you fired, OP. Lol 

I never said I told him he is cursed, I said I sometime Assume Or Think he is, though i know he's not, but even if he is, I will never say that to his face, that would be insulting him which is not the same as helping.

[imstillthebest]

you know what , you are such a good example . i read your story carefully and i figured out that you arent the one that has a problem but it was your best friend  . you can gamble responsibly but your verry humble because you have quit gambling for good  , not the total quit ofc  .

please dont be tired helping your best friend , i mean not in a way of lending him money so that he can gamble again but the help in the form of spiritual and mental advice   . good bless to the both of you   

[pilosopotasyo]

I never said I told him he is cursed, I said I sometime Assume Or Think he is, though i know he's not, but even if he is, I will never say that to his face, that would be insulting him which is not the same as helping.

Take away that thinking gamblers are not cursed or should think that way, they are just not lucky that they are in that position they need guidance and understanding from responsible gamblers and families to get out of that position, we must not discriminate,  we also experienced that we thought we are in control when actually we are not.

[acroman08]

it would be best for him to be rehabilitated(his wife should have thought of that but I understand her anger) because if this continues it will get worse and will most likely lead to depression(if he still hasn't had it) at this time it would be great if you stay in contact with him giving him advice if he asks for it but I advise to refrain from lending him money so he won't rely on you every time he is out of money.

[Fivestar4everMVP]

it would be best for him to be rehabilitated(his wife should have thought of that but I understand her anger) because if this continues it will get worse and will most likely lead to depression(if he still hasn't had it) at this time it would be great if you stay in contact with him giving him advice if he asks for it but I advise to refrain from lending him money so he won't rely on you every time he is out of money.

No, not anymore, I used to lend him money when he hadn't opened up to me, he usually lied to me that he needs the money for feeding or to buy other stuff, some times, I thought of asking why he can't ask his wife for money, but on a second thought, I shift my mind from that cus i know right from time we got to know each, he never depended on her.
But eventually the wife left, that was when he opened up to me, since then, I've stopped lending him money, what we do now is that when ever we get paid our salary, he sometimes gives me 70 percent of the money to keep for him, he keeps the rest for his feeding and up keep, when he finishes the 30 percent and ask me to give me some money out of the 70 percent, I always do my best to make sure he won't go gambling with it before giving him the money, to be sincere, he still gambles when am away but the extent to which he gambles have reduced significantly

[michellee]

He must stop his habit of playing gambling, and I think with your help, he can cure his addicting. Your friend is not a curse, and I think he has another problem that makes him addicting. Maybe you need to talk privately with him to tell you what is the real problem. Sometimes, people run away if they have a problem with something, but they don't try to solve it, and they will get deeper into that.

We can play gambling, but we must know the limitation and controlling ourselves so we don't become addicting. We can have fun inside the gambling but don't get addicted because you already saw what happened to your friend.

[GreatArkansas]

He literally lost control. Aiming to get back those losses and keep losing and losing. That is really difficult.
I also have that kind of friend, just last week, this friend of mine was able to borrow some money on me to get his smartphone back since he was able to pawn his cellphone just to pay some of his debts on other people because of GAMBLING.

It's really difficult, but he should be thankful because you still there, a friend that still understands and still on his side. Just keep encouraging him about what is better or ask him to do some things so he will forget gambling even in a short period of time.

[gabbie2010]

I believe there is a spirit that always keep on controlling an addicted gambler they always a feelings of winning big someday which never happen, I have seen soccer gambler whose accumulated odds was 200.0 or above  (i.e more than 20 matches odds) having the impression that once those bets are won that amount to millions despite the fact the chances of winning those kind of bet is very slim.
A way out of this kind of habit is counseling your friend, you should extend a helping hand to him by outlining the pros and cons of gambling addict
the disadvantages outweigh it advantages or he should limit his gambling habits to the minimum.

[rhomelmabini]

Feel sorry for your friend Basset but I think he really needs a rehab with the current situation he's in. What I can advise for you is to be at him at his side and if by chance if he ever ask you to lend again, don't be, since that will just be put through onto his gambling addiction.

If he can't be put on a rehabilitation center then it's best if there's people that will remind him everyday to stop it. Though there's some people that will try to stop him it's still himself that could stop the mess he is into.

[plvbob0070]

It's best for your friend to consult with an expert to help him stop or lessen his addiction to gambling because based on your story, it's not healthy anymore. It's really hard when you get out of control with spending your money and having an addiction because it will affect not only you but also the people around you.

We often say it here what could gambling addiction do to us, and how should we control ourselves but outside this forum, there's a lot of people suffering from addiction. But really, your friend can still do something to change, he just needs to accept it and be willing to change for the best.

[acroman08]

it would be best for him to be rehabilitated(his wife should have thought of that but I understand her anger) because if this continues it will get worse and will most likely lead to depression(if he still hasn't had it) at this time it would be great if you stay in contact with him giving him advice if he asks for it but I advise to refrain from lending him money so he won't rely on you every time he is out of money.

No, not anymore, I used to lend him money when he hadn't opened up to me, he usually lied to me that he needs the money for feeding or to buy other stuff, some times, I thought of asking why he can't ask his wife for money, but on a second thought, I shift my mind from that cus i know right from time we got to know each, he never depended on her.
But eventually the wife left, that was when he opened up to me, since then, I've stopped lending him money, what we do now is that when ever we get paid our salary, he sometimes gives me 70 percent of the money to keep for him, he keeps the rest for his feeding and up keep, when he finishes the 30 percent and ask me to give me some money out of the 70 percent, I always do my best to make sure he won't go gambling with it before giving him the money, to be sincere, he still gambles when am away but the extent to which he gambles have reduced significantly

that's great! he is trying to limit himself and it rare for someone to trust anyone when it involves most of their money, you two must be good friends. but I still think he needs medical attention for his gambling addiction since the way he is doing it right now is merely preventing himself from losing all of his money by entrusting majority of his salary to you to keep. also, since he trusts you why not talk about to him about rehabilitation or talk to someone with medical expertise about gambling addiction from time to time.

[Gotumoot]

The problem with those kind of people like your friend is that they rely too much on the people around them so they wouldn't mind spending their money since they know they could always borrow from them.
They are careless because they know they have someone who they could rely on if you really want to help your friend guide him properly don't lend money and let him taste the consequence of his own action the part when the wife left him should have been a good wake up call for him.

[bisdak40]

~snip~

IMO, you friend Bassey needs professional help as he is out of control. He is not cursed because i don't believed in that, he just don't have the discipline a gambler should have. He has already a job so gambling for him should be for fun and not to earn money as if he does not expect money monthly. I have many friends who i considered compulsive gamblers but they don't end up like what you described on your friend because my friends knows what they are doing, i mean they have the objective on that particular day and when they achieved that, they call it a day and come back whenever they have free time. Easier said than done but your friend really lack the discipline.

[Sadlife]

People like that, who's so into gambling will never listen to anybody. Its only after he losses everything then he'll realize what his mistakes are. Probably, let him be for now, because his mindset right now is focused on recovering his losses. That's why he'll never stop until he wages the last money he has. When that time comes never give him anything, even if he begs you. You can always help him by giving food.

[Saisher]

So am urging everyone out there playing to play, but try not to make it a lifestyle, try to always play with only money youve decided to loose, play for the fun and don't expect anything back... Play and don't get addicted.

Some words here are not right

play with only money you've decided to loose,

when we are playing we are hoping to win but it will not harm us or we will not get disappointed if we lose, we are not giving money to gambling sites we are playing against it and hoping to win while having fun,I never play to give I'm trying to hodl my money but if I lose it's ok with me at least I tried.