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I don't understand the concept of mourners/bereaved family members being made to shovel sand into a grave before it is covered once a deceased is lowered into it.

What the heck is that?

Some say it is a reminder that man is from dust and will ever return to dust. Don't we all know that. Do we really need that kind of reminder? I guess not.

People already know all that, except kids and funerals aren't meant for kids. But then, man has always looked for ways to glamourise even the ugliest of opportunities at funerals.

Also, I am of the opinion that sermons and preachings at funerals are time wasting. Yes! It's unnecessary time wasting because no amount of preaching during funerals has ever converted anyone. People are just after the food and drinks. Nothing more!

What do you guys think?

 I agree with your opinion!

RESPECT

Maybe it is a tradition passed down for generations.  I normally see people standing far back when they lower the casket and put dirt onto it. 

Where i come from (Massachusetts U.S.A.) they no longer shovel the dirt onto the casket or watch it being lowered. I think because reality sets in that your loved one is no longer with you. They say the prayers and place flowers on the casket then leave.

I respect your opinion but from my perspective there is more to it than just a waste of time, what else could they have spent such time doing Making money ? Eating and Having Sex ? Or what ? , of course it does not matter how long you spend there or how many people are there to pour sand on the casket it wouldn't bring back the dead. But I think being there and every activity done is just to help people find closure and move on, just the same as those who chooses to go drop flowers even years after the passage of their loved ones.

Oh, thanks for attempting to send me merit.


Oh? Do they then not lower the casket at all? You mean they don't graves any more? I don't understand what you're trying to say.

Dude,this is pretty weird topic. :-\
Funerals are just a ritual and I think that rituals are important for us as a society,because it's a way to show us that we are a community and we live together.Life is short and we have to help each other and move on,when shit happens.

This is part of the grieving process so that soon the person can easily get over the whole thing because he/she experienced it first hand. The ceremonies and also rituals are just part and parcel of this process depending on one;s faith and preferences. I don't see it as a waste of time. This is also giving honor to that someone who has left...though we are doing things on this differently depending on culture and beliefs. I do respect your view on this as a waste of time but maybe that might not be for others. And as there are many sands in the seashore, we do have our different takes on this topic. Smile.

In my opinion through funerals we show our respect toward deceased people.
Usually the death of a family member is a very difficult emotional loss for family and relatives.
Family need a certain funeral ceremony and mourning so that they can face the loss of loved ones.
You will understand when you are older.

The simply answer for that is tradition. As far as I know it's more of a Roman Catholic thingy. So if you are brought like this then obviously you can't do anything what the family says.

But we are already in the brink of what? 21th century? Some old tradition faded out, for me it's doesn't make any difference though, I just pray for the deceased person whether a relative or not. Because sooner or later we will all die and be forgotten as well.

totally agreed on this,though I respect that tradition still I find it weird why people(family members and friends)of the dead person doing such thing
Why not just cry fo you losses and then bring to the grave and that’s it,no ceremony’s and stuffs that dead people won’t acknowledge.
And also I find it Funny  that when the person is still alive they don’t show the love but when the said died,they cry a lot,things that I find stupid to do since you have many chance to show when they are still alive lol

Every religion will have different perception about funerals, and they will give the last honour to that person who died and the family.
Maybe that will not make us feel comfortable to follow the ceremony, and we have an option to not join in that ceremony if we don't like.
I don't think that it's wasting time to go to that funerals since we have a different reason.
Besides that, I don't think every people who go to the funerals will after the food and drinks.

Also one of the saddest thing about the whole situation is when they try to sell an expensive casket to the family and make it sound like they are getting a good deal but in reality they are getting ripped off.

The church goers believe in buying caskets (they feed the termites and worms with it). This isn't so with the Moslem burials. They just wrap the corpse in a plain cloth and lowered it into the grave without a casket. This cuts off unnecessary expenses.

Well yes I agree that sermon and preaching is wasting time.human who died never know what happened on earth anymore.what the use of preaching and sermon for a died person.
But a wakes of an person for how many days for me is not wasting time.because this is the only few day that you can see your love ones who died.mourners also is normal in every families who love ones pass away.

I agree, it's really stupid

I dont agree because I had a close family member die last week and we went to the funeral ofcourse, and for me it wasnt about food or drinks, but thinking about the good times with that person and griefing, hearing stories about that person.

I can understand if ur not really close to the person and you are just invited, and you go because it is the right thing to do, but you can atleast show some support to the people who where close to the person or family!

This is a tradition and although it looks nonsense we should respect this, some families have their own tradition that they passed to those they have left, and they go down from generation to generation, we should respect that, some traditions are the things that define their family, so we should let them be.

If you go to a funeral of someone you do not care, it seems just a waste of time.

But if you go to a funeral of a loved one, the rituals can make it easier to say goodbye and help in the mourning process.

Do not judge.

And what is time Wasting? Two wasted minutes? Wow your time is precious. Funerals take many hours anyway.

I cannot agree more to be honest. It's not a waste of time unless you are defining it as a waste of time. I'm never present at funerals of people which I didn't know well. That's it. You decide whether a funeral is worth attending or not.

Of course, not everyone who is at a funeral is there for the food and drinks, especially the bereaved family. But we can't truly say this of gatecrashers and distant attendees. I really don't give a damn about the reasons people attend funerals, whether for food or to pay their last respects. All I am saying is that the time spent at funerals on sermonizing is unnecessarily long and time wasting.

This are culture that has been layed down by our ancestors and though it is not necessary, but been a reminder, it is good we should keep doing them. This brings repentant to our soul. Reminding us that one day people will gather to mourn our own death too. It is good that we should know that everything we do on this earth, we learn it here on earth and since this do not harm anyone I think it is good.

Different religion has different kind of beliefs ad everyone will fall into this category only the way of funeral might change.I don't think its wasting time,it might be considered as respecting their souls.

This so culture we always attribute to dead and long gone ancestors are obnoxious and should be jettisoned. I don't know why we worship these cavemen as ancestors, especially in Africa. Remember that these same ancestors longed to see our days and the phenomenal technologies. They should be the ones envying us and not the other way round.

I agree. I definitely see the appeal of these individuals sending their goodbyes but they are also super expensive imo

I think we should respect it because last time we see our love-ones and it is not time wasting to say good bye him, and the main reason behind it, we come in funerals because we share the pain with our family members who have a lot of love for him and now he has left us forever.

Funerals are a way to pay homage to the deceased.

You have your whole life for rushing up. At least take a rest and calm yourself down when a person close to you dies and remember how much more time you save, your are still going to die on your death day.

Its not a waste of time especially if its the one you know or your love ones funeral. Gives you closure and all. What I dont like in funerals are the speeches like they talk about the nice things the guy/gal have done, like they really know the person. Im not saying that it should be the bad things that needs to be said but it needs to be neutral. I actually hate funerals.

Family reunion.     8)

Exactly mate,actually most of the time funeral turns as family reunion because almost the whole family members also extended family goes to the mourn special in the last night before settling under 7ft I know this is not part of tradition but maybe this kind of occasion gives the opportunity to the family members to take a OFF from work or what they are doing in life and go tighter to see each other again.and this may happen again when someone died in future lol 😂

in this way, people pay tribute to the deceased person, I think it is important

I told my parents that, they called me a stupid person.

We pay respect to the deceased person, it is important for everyone

people really want to complicate your life

People say goodbye to a person, it's normal in the 21st century

Saying goodbye to a person is normal but what does it mean saying goodbye to a corpse? It's utter trash, IMO. The only sensible goodbye one can say is to take good care of someone when they are sick or in lack, not when they're dead. Dead people don't have feelings. I think people just want to shoe off during funerals (especially in Africa) of how affluent and wealthy they are. That's just it, not as if they truly care.

A corpse is indeed just that, I agree.

But a person who once lived has a soul, which we can neither confirm nor deny the fact until we ourselves had gone through that death or near-death experience for ourselves.

Nonetheless, caring for a loved one even before they're born (while inside a mother's womb), knowing them well while growing up (as a sibling, extended family member or friend), including having personal and/or business relationships (throughout the person's life experiences), or maybe while taking care of them when they're sick are all the possible circumstances that a person may experience with another while they're still living in this world.

Respect though is another story altogether, for when you leave this world, you leave it alone.  But for those you left behind, they are the ones who mourn and pray for their dearly departed loved ones instead.

I don’t think a funeral is needed at all. Personally, I want that after the death of my physical body and after my departure from the material world, so that my relatives do not engage in this nonsense. I approximately know what to expect after death and how it all happens in reality, therefore I can say that it’s better not to bury a person, but to burn it.
Moreover, I see no reason to be sad! Why we must say goodbye to a person with tears and negative emotions, who is better off from this? It seems to me that on the contrary, we should be happy for a person, that now he is not burdened with a physical material body, and only the best is waiting for him. For example, a funeral may be as follows (at 2:46) : https://youtu.be/V1bFr2SWP1I?t=161

That's where my point succinctly lies — granted that the soul returns to the maker or perishes in hell according to the Bible, then why do we labour to spend a lot during burials? It makes no sense to me. It's just that the bereaved only want to make a point that they could afford to bury their corpse well. Nothing else. Again, I m sure the prayers rendered on a corpse at funeral is needless because it doesn't change the destination of the corpse. The Bible tells us that once a man dies, judgment follows him immediately. His fate is decided even before he's buried.

Thats not Heck,instead you are the Heck of us,why do you care about others belief ?respect ours and we will respect you STUPID one.

Hey, mind your language and stop addressing people rudely. The OP is meant as a question and was never addressed to anyone in particular. No insults. But if that's what you do or it's your belief system you might explain your view in simple and CORRECT English and not hurl insults here. This is a sane community. Otherwise you won't go far.

Well we have different belief and traditions. It might be a waste of time because it cant change anything. But for some people having a funeral for their loved ones is a way to remember their time spent here and for the family to send their final goodbyes.

I don't think.
This is a traditional practice that we should uphold and remember.
because whatever you don't get reminded you might eventually forget about it, and the younger generation will no longer know it.

I suddenly recall and agree, that in some families wherein there's no actual organized annual family reunion, a funeral gathering does serve the same purpose too.

Also, it's a way for everyone to pay their respects to the dearly departed friend or family member, an opportunity to see everybody else and to keep in touch once again since everyone's usually too busy nowadays.

i mean, yeah, if you're seeing it in a technical point of view. i guess people are just sticking with the tradition...

Lol, you sound very pained, almost like you jabe attended many funerals, and they have wasted a lot of your time. Blacks most especially believe in elaborate activities, that is why their funerals and even wedding ceremonies are filled with many unimportant activities. It is such a pity.

It's just a way to pay your condolences to those no longer with us. 

It's about respect and tradition and I don't think there is anything wrong with continuing this tradition.

I have buried many loves ones and its the same routine every time.

If you know the meaning of the word "RESPECT" then you'll have not to ask things like this.

We have our own Beliefs and rights on what is our ancestors tells us what to do , If you don't have mourning in your world , well then we have it.

We show our last Goodbyes to our love ones and sorry to say but you must not care about what we have , Do your own and let us do ours. simply as that.

I don't find funerals a waste of time. They are helping friends and family to move on. It's a few hours on a special day, I am not sure why you would be skipping it. Like the thing with families and friends is that they usually don't live in the same city or even state. So with the funeral everybody is coming, you usually get a day of from work which makes travelling a lot easier. And you will be able to meet friends and family you haven't meet in a while. I hope we won't stop with funerals.

I would like to give some merit to you but it seems that I don't have any sMerit right now.
And I agree it is for those who truly loves the deceased every moment that they could to see their love ones wouldn't be consider as a waste for them.
Not everyone is the same as OP had mention some of the people who goes at the funneral goes there to show respect to grieve or mourn with the family not just for the food or drinks.
But we are free to tell our own opinion.

Why should I? you are the one who called it as HECK you stupid one? and in CORRECT English ? as if you are a literal english speaker ?

Get a Life you and Pay respect to our religion , I don't know what have you do in your dead people , but ours ? they are most respected and the emotion is indeed deep.

Every religion has their own system and traditions which is done to mourn the departed soul and various offering and prayers are offered. This is belief where people want to do it or follow it or no. There would be reasons to it and that is why it is done and also say have you decided for yourself and written a not that after you are away from earth what and how it should be done ?

I don't know why you're so insinuative over a harmless post as that. Could it be that you make a living from funerals and you felt threatened by my post that someone was about to take the feeder off your mouth? Well, I merely expressed a concern and asked others for their opinions concerning that and didn't go past that line. Whatever your fancies are, they're yours and shouldn't be imposed on others. And for the fact that someone didn't agree with what you think shouldn't amount to name dropping. You talked about religion there whereas it's tradition that's in question. If it were religion, I liked for you to cite such from a religious book.

Again, you may want to learn how to express yourself in simple but correct English.

Now, go get a life!

so you are really affected now ? continues posting here even if this is not part " Of Your Paid Post from your Signature " Hahaha

Common Man don't Be Butthurt  and lets not use insult from how people post in english because it only reveals that you are a Trying hard english speaker also Stupid Loser  :D

if i am to get a Life then what is for you?

Maybe when someone from your tribe dies? you have just Dump  them like a Dead  Rabbit in the Bush ?  :D   Live a life that what represent your Tribe and don't pretend that you Knew how city life is  :D

I believe that this is a religious belief mate , Lets Look how our brothers Muslim has , As far as i know (According to my Muslim friends ) their Dead love one must be put on grave before the sun down , meaning there is only short time for mourning , Please correct me if I'm wrong here mate.
While in Christian beliefs there must be a Funeral service that lasts from 3 days to sometime longer , I remember My brother died back in December and my parents wanted the funeral to be last up to January 2 for the reason Christmas  and Newyear is no longer fun because we have someone to Mourn .