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I don't know of the other side of the World, but in this side of the World, men are responsible for every financial responses in both marriage and the boy/girlfriends relationships.
The demands of financial expenses is being too much at the men sides.
Here, my friends girlfriend who is a university scholar that faces financial challenges is keeping my friend worried,
On the 14th Februarys which marks the "Valentines day"(lovers day) as it may imply, it is usually a special day here in this side of the World where couples and those in intimate relationships or even relatives do have it a remarkable day to spend together. It was likely a tradition that they must gift each other with what is affordable but gifted on a special offer.
The guys (men) are most expected to play this gifting role but here at this edge, my guy thought of having his girlfriend the sum of $50 cash believing she has more of financial issues to tackle than acquiring materialistic items (gifts). This is so she can utilize the money and add up to her educational fees or otherwise.
Now, she said the guy is not being caring and romantic simply because other persons to her notice are being gifted of materialistic items instead of money. She expected me to purchase her items with the gifted money.

This is just how awkward and lack of financial sensibilities some women could be who just sits, makes demands and gets what they wanted without having the compassions of how hard it is to make the money's they spends so carelessly.

It looks like you're the one dating a materialistic girlfriend and not you friend. So you should man up and stop saying my friend's girlfriend. ;D

Ladies want to be loved, cared for and pampered with gifts, especially on an important day like the Valentine's day. However, just as all shoes have different sizes, that's how we all have different financial capacities. If a lady cannot accept or is not satisfied with the gifts and money I can shower her at my level. Then, It's a red flag for me and I'd gladly pack my bag and baggages and run a way, because I'll not steal to impress a lady.

That's the same in most countries I think, men has been given the role of breadwinner for decades, and it will be difficult to change it instantly, the 'woke' ideology hasn't been around for long, and in my experiences people who spread it mostly are arrogant so it will be hard to change the view of men as the one who responsible financially. All that being said as a men I have no problem to become responsible to earn money for my family, because my wife also has most of the domestic responsibility, so it's still fair and teamwork.

But despite the societies view of how men should be responsible to earn money, there are many women now who also doesn't like that and in this modern era the gap of opportunity between man and women is keep shrinking, so I think there is still a chance,  if you want to find a women who want to share financial responsibility, but then again as a husband you will need to share domestic work responsibility too.

Thanks to social media nowadays that are portraying people to become materialistic. Those videos that have been about giving their dates material things and gifting them money probably have influenced a lot of people not just yours and your friends but many, as in.

Celebration isn't just all about receiving or gifting but also about the time that you're spending together and having some good laughs.

People have forgotten about romantic dates and not just all about these material possessions. It is really true that chivalry is gone.

Know what your woman likes, we ladies like to be studied. When our partners pay attention to the little details of what we like, it is good evidence that they really love us. You can add more value to a little amount you intend to give to give someone as gift by just converting it into something nice that they may not be able to guess the price.

 I am one example of this, I like to earn money for myself, I do not want to depend completely on a man.

But this mentality of hipping financial burden on the men is fast fading out. There are women now whose mindset has started to change and they are having the reorientation of support to the men in their numerous financial obligations that is to the men. If you look closely, you will see such women that are determined to help reduce the financial challenges of the men. So stay away with those women that will drain your finance and render you bankrupt, it is not worth it that all financial obligations should be on the kneck of a man because it will increase the level of stress to the man and of course hard times reduces the life span of the man from it associated health challenges.

It does not only happen in your country but also every side of the world.
Maybe the girlfriend is a materialistic person that's why he prefers to receive flowers from her boyfriend instead of receiving money. Posting pictures when they receive flowers and other gifts during valentines is romantic for girls most especially for couples.

Actually this kind of problem isnt something new anymore on which there would really be those women who are really that loving to feel that their loved ones do really cares or mind of them.
This is why when it comes to those gifts and other things then it is actually that they are really anticipating something like this and ended up on getting some cash. Some girls might be able to appreciate
it at least but majority will really be definitely be expecting that they are able to receive something like a gift specially on this occasions or season of love. We do know that this do really once every year
so it is really just that normal that they would be expecting something effort on your part as a man.

Well, if you dont like but your friend doesnt mind off about that lack of sensibility about money then it would really be up to his choice whether he would really be that
still continuing on with her or would really be having those kind of disappointments on which it would be leading to break up but actually this is really just that an small issue
i should say.

While reading I noticed op could be the one in this shoe but he doesn't want to make it appear directly but that's fine as much as the post is understood.

We have two different people in society and to this two categories their priority differs extremely that the boundary can be clearly marked out. Here's a lady that has academic challenges that needs money to solve  but she prefer using the money given her in cash that could solve her academic issues to rather being used for material items. That's a misplaced priority. And if am to advise you, I'll say it's an early sign that you end things with her cause your visions doesn't align. In the future ,You could be planning to invest in estate she could be having another plan for that money to go on a vacation in the Maldives.

It sounds like your country is yet to catch up with a decent society. It's better living in a world where men and women are equal on these things, both should be earning the same salaries - particularly when it comes to things where strength has zero input to the equation, like most office based jobs. What you are inadvertently saying is, you have financial power over women by claiming the this status quo exists around you and that's a rather sick mentality to live among. Women will never be fully liberated and free in such a society, but quite often this is what men around them want to do - suppress them and hold them back. I feel sorry for any women who live in such countries, as it often has roots in religious oppression and this manipulation should have been discarded a long time ago.

There’s a lot of people focuses on material things nowadays and they are following the trend in social media and I don’t agree that only one should be responsible on their finances because both parties should agree on how they will handle their finances for the benefits of their own family. If only men are the one who is responsible for the finances of their family, then that could give a big pressure to him and he might be forced to spend more time in work than to spend more time with his family because of that pressure.

sensitive or not, it is more important to be able to manage finances properly. aka if only for a pleasure need there is no need to go into debt to fulfill it. motorbikes and cars are a pleasure need whatever the reason, for example, to go to work for this or that.
especially just for the needs of dating is not very important. unless you are married, your wife's needs you are responsible for there is a budget to provide for your family.

Women extracting resources from men is just their proclivity. There are even some blunt people who say that all women are natural gold diggers but some of them are just better at hiding the shovel. That is one of the reason why they don't have the need to be financially savvy as they expect someone to provide for them.

giving any girlfriend money is likened to prostitution.. girlfriends prefer gifts. especially on valentines..
even if its a small cute teddybear worth $50. get her the teddybear not the $50

its only "materialistic" girlfriend if she demands expensive items, like a lambo or a $#k gucci purse

giving a girl $50 is not caring
giving a girl a kitchen appliance because she needs it is not caring

if i gave my wife the newest most modern expensive washing machine on valentines day because last week she has been saying how it has been playing up and needs a new one..even if she needed it.. getting her it on valentines.. ends the day where im sleeping on the couch on her orders, with the dog, not her

small cute romantic gifts are the standard for valentines day.. not money, not needed kitchen appliances, not lambo's

advice for rest of the year
getting a girl flowers and candy on valentines day is accepted with a smile, without question
getting a girl flowers and candy on any other day.. has her doing a concerned frown look, questioning "what did you do wrong" waiting for you to apologise for something

a single rose randomly during year is romantic
a bunch of roses+candy is an apology

Well, if it was really that important to buy her a gift, thenyou or your friend would have used $20 to buy a little gift for her and only handed over $30 to her. Although the girl seems to be comparing her boyfriend to other guys who are giving their girlfriend materialistic gifts,. 

Relationships usually work better and can become fruitful if both parties understand themselves very well. The girl is supposed to know the level of income her guy has and what he can afford for her, and she just has to be content with it. If she is being too materialistic and your friend feels he can't cope with the relationship, he can still find another relationship with a girl who can be content with what he has. 

If we take into account the increased number of women who are financially stable and sufficient we will already know that many things have changed and people's mentality have changed from what it used to be to reorientation and discovery of the fact that all humans have the same mental capacity both man and woman.

The only thing that differentiates all is the fact that the individual level of education and knowledge,  this and many more are the factors to consider while making any progressive move.

Well, you can’t blame your girlfriend if she acted like that since that’s what she’s been seeing from other couples or girlfriend/boyfriend relationship. Women are said to be more romantically attached to every memorable events in life, while men are less focused on that probably. However, gifting her that amount is not bad at all as long as she’s more practical in life. But you know her better than us, so maybe you also gave her some flowers and chocolates and that money should only serve as a bonus, that is if you really want to make that girl feel special and loved.

she probably just wants a small little gift thats more suited for the theme of valentine not necessarily a thing about money or something expensive.
remember that when giving gift you should match the theme, giving money is simply ridiculous not to mention its just a small sum.
can't blame her entirely though, at valentine being given out some money probably the last think she would think would be happening.
if you more sensible, you could be giving gift that actually are priced less than $50 and save up some money for later. but thats just my 2 cents alright.

It's all about how you explain it to her. Surely, anybody reasonable enough will understand that more important expenses should come first.

However, if a girlfriend wants to celebrate Valentine's day, it can be done without a lavish preparation. It doesn't have to be deprived from anybody just because there are priorities.

We all eat, so a shared meal at home could be celebration enough. Perhaps a candle and some nice music would do the trick. Wearing whatever available nice clothes you have will add to the effect. And a rose won't probably cost too much as well.

A Valentine's day celebration doesn't to be costly.

OP's story is not about cost..
OP(GUY) was willing to spend $50... however instead of actually:
being romantic such as buying ingredients to cook at home using the $50.
being romantic such as buying flowers, chocolates and a romantic teddy bear using the $50
being romantic such as taking her out for a meal with the $50
being romantic such as [insert anything] using the $50

he just gave her the money.. and then wondered why (if she then gave sexual/intimate favours, which is normal end activity of valentines) she would think he is treating her maybe like a prostitute

the story says how it was a intimate relationship and she was comparing the gift to what other couples got, she didnt ask for more money or expensive gift. she simply asked why he didnt use the gift money to buy actual gift

the issue i see in OP story is the guy, not the girl

Valentine's day is a special occasion, especially for women in our country. However, receiving flowers and chocolates is enough to make them happy and feel special. But due to extreme poverty caused by high inflation, I've seen some women on social media expressing a desire for practical gifts from their boyfriends, like rice instead of flowers and chocolates. It may seem funny at first, but I realized that it's actually sensible given the circumstances. After all, flowers won't fill their hunger. Instead of amusement, my feeling shifted to admiration. It's more important to find a woman who is practical rather than materialistic, as this is a sign that she'll be a good spouse, prioritizing family over her own happiness.

Don't worry my friend, you need to wait until the next month, if she didn't give you any gift or the gift has lower value than your gift, you can express if you're not happy and angered her just like she did to you. If he didn't even know what is White Day or don't want to spend any effort for you, better to break up with her.

---

Many celebrities gifted a jewelry, car or other luxury thing to their spouses, do you give your wife or girlfriend a luxury thing every Valentines' Day? ::)

Never hope you will get a same thing like the others, the key is know what makes you happy and not, don't FOMO. This is the reason why most people bought Bitcoin at the peak and sell at the bottom because they buy Bitcoin because of articles.

I don't know why students are still falling victim of those things during valentine day, valentine day is a day of love sharing, but some boys and girls in school are now taking it as a Christmas or new year day when girls and boys use to demand money from their lovers to look different on that day.  As a students, you don't need to be carry away by relationship because after school girls or boys will be running after you to marry you, if you achieve a good certificate from the school, because they know that your future will be bright with that your achievement. If you're in a relationship as a student, and your spouse is always demanding money from you on the time, I will advice you to quit such relationship because it can lead you to financial frustration, and it can also make you to drop out from school.

Those are just puppy love i should say and not something that you could really be able to be with her for the rest of your lives on which it would really be just that right that you wont really be putting up that much attention.
If you do saw that you are really that saving some money for your future means and then your girlfriend is somehow who do really love on spending things and asking some materials on active manner then i dont see this is a wife-material kind of girl for me but if you are really just that right on this kind of behavior and type of girl then it would really be just that your choice.

If you dont really like this kind of type then you could be always free on leaving out but if you do want and make yourself that blind then its your choice but for me its not really that
necessary on spending on those gifts on which it would really be able to affect your saving capability specially now that we are living in a world which we do really
need to have that tons of money of course.  :)

Yea, what you said is true, mainly in African countries it has been a sole responsibility for men to make financial provision for their family, even in dating men have been found as the right gender to give when it comes to finances, though this is a segmental idea, but for me I think it should be a 70/30 thing, though from the Bible, men has been given the authority by God and the women are meant to be the supporters in the family but that doesn't mean that if a man is not financially buoyant the woman should ignore the basic provision if she has what it takes to do so, I am talking in terms of both marriage and relationship, these biblical notion should not be seen as an avenue to exploit men by women, in as much as I don't advocate for equal responsibility between the two gender, I am of the opinion that both parties should not look at it as if the whole responsibility is meant for one person, the needful should be done if either genders has what it takes to carryout the responsibility to avoid biased mindset.

its not about men being the bread winner where she should appreciate the money..
.. any other day of the year. literally anyother day. she would appreciate the money..

but on valentines day. the intimate day.. receiving money is where a girl would feel like a prostitute
valentines day is literally the only day where giving money is the worse idea possible
even just giving a small heart shaped keyring for $2 is better then giving $50 in cash

valentines day is about romantic gifts..

also:
valentines day is literally the only day where giving kitchen appliances is the worse idea possible
even just giving a small heart shaped keyring for $2 is better then giving a microwave or food mixer or any appliance worth $50

the gift you give represents how you see the person
give them money says you see them as prostitute
give them a kitchen appliance says you see them as a maid/housewife

it literally is the least romantic message you can say to a girl about how you see them..

i laugh at how many people in this topic are defending the guy.. it literally shows they have no experience with women nor understand them
im a guy and even i know basic ettiquate and know the result of such action of giving money on valentines day is a bad idea.

You're not wrong when  giving a practical gift, but on Valentine's Day, emotions and the moment matter just as much. Especially for many women, feeling valued and cherished through thoughtful gestures is more important than practicality. Perhaps consider a gift that reflects her interests or creates a special memory together.

Furthermore, I disagree with the idea that men solely bear financial responsibility in relationships, especially in early stages like dating. A healthy partnership involves mutual support, including sharing financial burdens. Splitting bills or taking turns treating each other is a common way to demonstrate this. We should also acknowledge that many women today are financially independent and contribute equally or even more than their partners. True partnership thrives on understanding, respect, and shared effort, not outdated gender roles.

Usually that's what they see on their environment and also social media contributes a lot on this since many people fantasize romantic things that's why they want also to apply it in real life so that they can be in and have something to post online so people could see that they are celebrating the month of love. But I don't find any problem with this since this doesn't determine a problem and it maybe became worst if a person will do crime just fund there wants and have money to present to their love ones.

Also if the girl is demanding a lot that out of capability of the guy then I think that person is so materialistic and he really need to get out on that relationship so that he will not be total control and also can escape on such person which only give him a headache.

For those who are mature enough and established in their lives, of course they already know which are the basic needs and which are the needs for fun, so each person can easily separate these things through their own lives. And in general, everyone can probably still live their life without motorbikes and cars or dating as you said, so they don't have to have debt if their living conditions are still quite stable and they don't suffer too much due to lack of money or income every month.

But for those who are married and want to open a business to channel capital into the business, of course it is not wrong if they want to take out debt so they can run a business that they can manage quite well. Because going into debt to open a business is a very common thing and is also quite feasible as long as the business owner has such intentions and pays it on time. So debt is not always bad if someone knows where to place it and where to use it for a better purpose for themselves.

I know we all have responsibility and targets that are very important to meet up. Women likes to be treated special and sometimes when they come up with a demand like gifts for valentines and birthdays most guys don't know how to handle matters like this. If the money is not available is to make them understand how things  financially at the moment and if something small can also be present to them as a gift it is also better. When women want to be treated special it doesn't mean it must be something so big or expensive. Little can be be given to show how special they are.

You need understanding to follow women up, they always needs to be treated special which it doesn't need to e something too big but something that can be giving to them in a special way.

I mean yeah, it's basically a lack of effort that I'm seeing here. Just like everyone else on here as said, go buy her something that's special. Money by itself is not particularly special, because everyone's got money, right? And if everyone's got something then it's no longer special.

In this context, I can understand the comparisons she's making to other couples, although that's not a good trait to have in the long run if you ask me.

Basically people have different ways of showing and feeling love. Some like gifts, others prefer time or gestures. Your friend and his girlfriend might have different preferences, causing some confusion. They should just talk openly about what they expect and find a compromise that works for both. Understanding each other's feelings can help avoid misunderstandings and make their relationship stronger

In my opinion, this does not mean being financially insensitive. But on big days like Valentine's Day, of course giving gifts is one way to show your girlfriend how much you love her. Giving gifts can be a sign that your boyfriend is a special person for you. Why is that? Because it takes effort to find a gift and wrap it, although the price is not very expensive, it is more valuable than giving $50.

Because not everyone values money on Valentine's Day. If he prefers to receive gifts, respect your boyfriend's request. Although you may feel good about giving him money, this can actually put a strain on your relationship with your boyfriend.

Thankfully, I like in a more equitable country, where some people do have some standard patriarchal values, but younger generations are more progressive. Women and men join the workforce pretty equally, so both have their own finances and can choose to either have the split budget or a shared budget. Men are not expected to pay for dates or exclusively buy presents. It's common to split the bills and for both to give presents to each other in a relationship.
Gifting money isn't common in couples in my country, a gift is supposed to be something specific (not necessarily expensive, as it can be just something pretty like a love letter or some sweets). I don't know about the op's country, but perhaps that's why the girl was offended, too, as money is the easiest gift because you don't need to take time and care into buying an actual gift this way.

Learning value is part of financial literacy, not only earning and spending. Your friend's $50 donation is practical. He looks deeper to meet a need rather than follow gifting standards. However, we are locked in a cycle where the gesture is misinterpreted as a lack of romance. We need to rethink care and assistance

The problem is a communal failure to understand relationship worth and support, not men or women. When did we start measuring love with tangible things? What's more important to our partner's well-being? Instant satisfaction or long-term support? Your friend's girlfriend's reaction is classic forest-for-trees confusion. She wants the gift's shape, not its content

We should all learn to value financial prudence and emotional intelligence in our relationships. Let's not confuse money with emotion. Instead, let's promote understanding and empathy and recognize actions' genuine impact

It is basically how they condition your brain with marketing, and that's why they all think of it that way. I get that it may not be all that easy for some people but at the same time we are talking about millions even maybe over a billion people getting that marketing. When they do it that way, it becomes normal.

Like for example a diamond ring wasn't a proposal thing 100 years ago, then slowly the marketing became so important for it that the diamond stuff that you buy to your wife became the symbol of how much you love her. That is all marketing, diamond doesn't worth that much at all, it's cheap to made and worthless resource, but they made marketing so much that they can sell it for whatever they want now.

The guy didn't do anything thing wrong. He just tried to express his love for her by meeting her needs. Maybe both of them are not communicating properly because the guy's action was an expression of love. Even if the guy had given her a gift, she would have still put pressure on the guy for the $50 and who knows if he has extra funds. Ladies have different love languages because I know that many girls in my location would appreciate the money as a Valentine's gift more than roses or another gift.

It is time we stop copying the lives of others on social media and other platforms and consider living our lives based on our conditions. The girl is not happy because her friends received gifts and she got cash, that's not right. The most important thing is that somebody loves and cares about you that he is sacrificing his hard-earned money and all he is getting for his love is backlash. Even if you receive the wrong gift from someone you love, you should show appreciation because love covers multiple of sins.

In every relationship lays in the man's hand and whatever way you build your relationship so it will lead to marriage and even when in marriage you wouldn't faced any difficulty.

As man you shouldn't have given your girlfriend or your friends girlfriend that opportunity and a chance to think of irrelevant things than the relevant, yes it's true that Valentine's day is always especially day but must gifting each other's be a thing of compulsion?

Well, to answer this clearly you or your friend must not gifts his fiance rather both can go out to a lovely places to express their love and feelings to each other, after which they can buy an affordable thing like Ice cream and any other romantic things to enhance their love play in that night or evening they find themselves together.

We don't need to give ourselves unnecessary pressure to spend extravagantly while there are other meaningful bills to pay out there, yes I know it's good to gift each other's but you can't skip the real responsibility that is holding you down there.

You knowing she has a very important thing to tackle with money and if such amount you mentioned can be used to speeding her school expenses then why on earth would she need more expensive gift while there is important thing to solve at school with money without her considering your financial state and level.

You have a choice. Everybody does. You don't have to continue with your relationship, don't you? If you don't like that person's behavior and that behavior could be anything, just leave her/him. Look for somebody else that has the right behavior for you. If you can't find anyone like that, then being alone is still better than having a partner that you don't like. In the long run you will hate that person more and it will bring you huge trouble. You will get hurt emotionally and financially. Is it worth the trouble? I don't think so. When people like you make these right decisions, the other side will have to fix their attitude. It may take decades but it will happen.

Lol. I don't blame her though, I blame the society she lives for believing women has to expect gifts from men. Normally, a gift doesn't have to be that expensive, a flower is enough and at most going for a date and hangout to spice up the relationship is enough to show love to anyone, you don't have to break the bank to do that, I think even that $50 was a mistake, you don't gift money but item and doesn't have to be expensive. The next time he decided to gift her money less than that amount might not be enough to her.

Now, the fact that she was so entitled and belittle what was given to her makes me irk, she is ungrateful and probably a gold differ or these girls that compare their relationship with other girls, they always see life as competitive, because my friend has expensive Gucci shoes as gift, my boyfriend has to gift me Versace or something better than what their friends has gotten, typical bullcrap behavior.

He is even financial unstable, instead of him to focus on his life and look for a way to be financially buoyant enough, he is chasing rubbish relationship that might not lead to nothing and later when he calculated all he has spent on the babe, he will now be regretting his actions and by that time, it will be late.

If the partner doesn't understand what you are trying to do then the relationship won't work, and generally the relationship in your teen or in 20s just long for a while not forever so never ever make decisions that may change your life for that person.

We should not categorize women lacks financial sensibility but one who knows, know.  ;D

Let's just give the equality they have been protesting on the social media or just let them completely independent, don't take someone's burden as yours unless the person does the same for you.

Indeed, never waste time complaining. There are male individuas who prefers being the provider of the relationship and to their partner on not to work at all and to just focus with their home perhaps, or their things such as studies. There's no need to force things 'coz you'll just end up with burnout. Engage with people that will match your preferences and interest. Not because they are not into investment means that they have no "future" within. There are just preferences; some are aiming for a higher position at work, and that's just fine. And with financial awareness, try to give her your insights of things to know if each of you would suit well with one another, if you really love her than to hide your negative viewpoints that will eventually affect the relationship in general.

Ha, Valentine's Day is a product of consumerism and exposure to the fakeness of social media. Back then, if you have a flower and a handwritten letter, that's enough to celebrate Valentine's day. Nowadays, people become so materialistic and addicted to social media that they want to receive gifts and post it for other people's validation and affirmation. I do have a partner and I made it clear that we're not going to spend on fancy dates just because everyone does. Thankfully, she understands and insisted on us going for a quick ride in the mountains with packed lunch. Also, men shouldn't be pressured to always spend in a relationship. If you don't have the money, be honest and sincere about it. If she doesn't accept it, then better find yourself another partner whose capacity to understand your financial status is greater.

We cant really deny that it did really have at least that kind of influences in speaking about things been upgrading as years passing by on which instead on accepting those flowers, they are more really that expecting something more like other things or materials which are expensive or something that having value or simply there are really indeed people or women who are really that materialistic. There wont really be an issue
if you are a rich person or man but if not? For sure you would really be hesitant on doing so and you would already be having those doubts on the girl you do love.
If you do have that kind of sense of being abused in terms of money then you can leave out anytime.  ;D

People wont really be able to feel out the importance of money not until they would really be able to experience those financial difficulties on which we know
that people would really be just that mindful on that only moment.

they guy had the money. was willing to spend that value.. its not about the amount.. and the girl declined the amount
its about the form in which he displayed his offering which signifies how he see's her

she took it [AS ALL WOMEN WOULD] as a sign that he was expecting intimacy in return for money.. AKA prostitution
if he made a true romantic effort, even just flowers and a love letter he would have got a whole different response
even a $2 heart shaped keyring would have got a better response from all women. including the OP's GF.. compared to any value of money small or big.. because its about the message it conveys

also if he or anyone moved onto a different girl and handed them money on valentines day.. he would get same response no matter the girl.
he sent the wrong message.. he subtly implied he seen her as a prostitute. as thats what the money implies. in this circumstance of intimacy expectation after gifts

so heed his example everyone. dont give a girl money and expect intimacy especially on valentines without her thinking you want to treat her as a prostitute
avoid such mistakes. get her anything cute/romantic. even if its cheaper/tackier .. just make a proper romantic gesture

If we want to talk about Valentines Day and women in particular, then the guy who gave money as a gift failed totally. Sometimes people should stop thinking only about material benefits and do simple, yet effective money waste on a gift. Just think, flowers is a total waste of money, because they will be thrown in few days. Yet this is one of most simple and effective gifts. Just admit and feel ok when you get shaving foam and socks as a gift, when you buy her a Lamborghini.

OP, my female advice. If your girlfriend doesn't appreciate the gift, give her flowers next time. They will wither the next day, and you should be sure to indicate what she could buy instead of these flowers. The romance will quickly end when she grows up, and she will have the choice of buying a gift, a trinket, or, for example, necessary things for her child, and God forbid, food.
It is important to maintain good relationships despite any material difficulties. Isn’t this what is required of us during a wedding, in sorrow, and in joy? Today’s time requires practicality from young people. Being financially literate is an important trait for the future. You made a gift, but how it was appreciated only speaks of the stupidity of the recipient.

not all women think like that, but the girlfriend's feelings are reasonable and valid because Valentine's is only once a year, what if even a simple gift is prepared? that has nothing to do with the price or value of what the partner will give, of course girlfriends also want to experience that somehow they are special on Valentine's Day, but then again, not all woman are just like OP's friend's GF, There's still a lot of women out there who thinks practicality over material things.

That's why you can't just see women from the outside, especially those who are still unstable and don't understand their partner's condition.
sometimes they see videos showing how their boyfriend takes them out to buy something luxurious and buy gifts, they only see the fun part, without seeing someone they will always have problems, but the attitude you mentioned actually doesn't apply to all women, sometimes there are women who understands their partner's situation

lol, I can tell you personally that here in the United States, that women tend to care more often than men when it comes to taking their personal finances seriously.  I meet with both men and women about their financial retirement needs/goals every single day and I can say without a shadow of a doubt this is the case in general here in the US. 

Perhaps your side of the world has held women back as equals for far too long, and this is only one aspect of that, but..perhaps  I'm wrong, I don't know what part of the world you live in..

Honestly,its so alarming to hear and see how some ladies place unnecessary demands on their partners without a second thought forgetting that they have a better role to play in their relationship.This is why some guys are scared of going into a relationship these days.If you think you're not living to her expectations,I bet you,I'm so sorry for you because you can live up to anyone's expectations.
  If she's to materialistic,have a healthy conversation with her,decide on what you can live with,and what you can'nt,understand her personality,and if she's reasonable,she'll understand.

It is cool after reading most replies on this thread, however, this said friend of mine sometimes told me how his girlfriend is used to make materialistic demands as if that would be the end of offers she would request from him. I mean to say she doesn't act economically with the conscience that there are periods of times that things doesn't work out well for persons. She just want to get what she wants without excuses.
I have come across replies here agitating that the guy is not romantic, he's is not fit to have a girlfriend if he can not provide her needs, he should had purchase her some goodie gift from the $ and hand her over with the remaining cash. Hell no buddies! I guess most of us here doesn't understand that when you stand to be abided to a girls demands, you are likely to be under her command which she doesn't have ideals on how you struggles to gain your money and on that fact, she would definitely ruin the guys financial life because all she cares is bringing to her needs as if the money is something that is easy to get as little as her mindsets could be.
For a girlfriend who is having financial challenges, materialistic items shouldn't be a point of target and when you have a man who is there to provide for you, don't overload him, help him manage his resources so as to expect better more ahead.

Initially, it's not all women that has this thought towards men going out in search of money while there's is to sit back and think only about how they are going to be spending it. While most women are supportive some are not, but lately a good number of them are blood sucking leaches, they will have to make sure you spend your very last on them for items or things not necessarily needed though they can be needed but not on that exact time, just to impress friends or maintain same status as their friends, then when things don't go their way it would lead to a fight.
 Left For me I will like every man to help get their idle fiance, girlfriend or wife a good job, business or skill, so as to help relieve the burden from themselves, by doing so they'll  be able to pay bills themselves when need arises, I guess by so doing there won't be any worries or much of demands from the woman anymore.
 As a man if you are the only one providing you will end up having issues and worry over something you are not supposed to be thinking over, i will say one of the reasons why most men end up overthinking  is simply because they do carry unwanted load on them even when they feels like "I have much money" you'll  still see them complain. In my own opinion, I think  women should able to take care of some needs themselves and also assist their spouse sometimes too.

It's not about financial insensibility, it's more like an instinct that most women have where they care more about materialistic gifts than money and other stuff. A woman will feel much better if you give her a flower that might cost you $2 instead of getting a $10 gift card from you, it's because they want attention and love and they often see this being a competition with other girls and women and you need to make sure you don't disappoint, lol.

A girl or a woman will always compare what you do with what others are doing with their wives or girlfriends, and if she finds out that others are getting better treatments than her, she will never be happy with her relationship with you and this is the biggest reason for breakups nowadays.

Realistic is when you're demanding your spouse have a similar lifestyle like yourself e.g. if you're live in a small apartment, just looking for a man that live in a small apartment or larger one.

Materialistic is when you're demanding your spouse have a very high lifestyle than yourself e.g. if you're live in a small apartment, you don't want a man that live in a small apartment too, but you're looking for a man that live in a big castle and have McLaren.

If I were your friend, I'd cut off the relationship with her.

Just spend $50 for a prostitute and straightforward without any dramas. Why someone need to spend for $1K or more, spend a lot times and have many dramas, without any guarantee she want to fuck with you?

Well, if a woman becomes uncontent, then it is a red flag. You see, if the guy is the one who works hard or works his ass, then because the guy gave a not-so-expensive gist, the girl would react badly or not be content? Wake up; those women are not worth it. Yes, they have the right to demand, but of course, see the stats of your partner before you ask for something that is out of budget or expect a gift that only a guy could attain with his current situation or status. Valentine's Day is not all about gifts or what; it's about how you will express your feelings to your partner, family, or friends. If both partners don't have enough money to buy gifts for each other, then be content to be together. It's not about money; it's about who and what you are celebrating. And for me, a woman who doesn't have the capability to buy things on her own is a red flag.

Your last line for me may sound an understatement for women. Not all women are capable to provide on their own most especially if they are left with nothing but kids at home. But yes, I have to agree, if they really aim to get it, they can find ways to make it happen. Now, back on the topic, the kind of girl in the story is not the type of a wife material, as she choses to be more materialistic than being practical. She should be thankful instead as the guy offers her extra money, which the girl badly needed in real life.

However, every woman has different concepts on Valentine’s Day. But as for me, I’ll go for the one that accepts mo of who I am and what I can actually afford. The important thing is your presence when that event comes, so you can express your love and affection to the one you love.

Economic problems are often a source of commotion for many couples, both those who are not married both are married. The number of needs that must be met is often a source of painting. Because it cannot be denied that money is important because everything we buy in this world does require money. The thing that we hear most often from girls is that he demands a fairly high standard from prospective partners. So, do not be surprised if a lot of girls are looking for a man who is financially established. Actually the choice of being a girl can be considered positive. Because it is appropriate for a guy to battle bones to be able to support his wife and children / their partners.

In a household, economic problems will indeed become a problem if the husband does not have a sense of responsibility towards their family and there are also wives who demand too much from their husbands without looking at the condition of their husbands who have worked hard and do not have the money they can afford. obey what their wives ask and it would be better for them to encourage each other to be able to generate more income so that they can have the life they dream of and if they cannot get what they want, it is better for them to be grateful for what they have got.
It's true, there are some women who look for financially stable men so they can have a decent life like they want, but they will leave the man when they no longer have the wealth they want.

Its hard to stay in a relationship where mutual understanding is not practiced. That will only create some pressures between both of you. In the end, one may leave the other, or both will just end up get bored and lost interest with each other.

So as early as now, know if you can hold on to that person. Women will be women, but let’s not judge them being insensible just because of a single event. Try explaining about the situation and your concerns about her money struggles. If she refuse to understand you, that may be a sign that she’s not fit for you. Better spend your time and money to other different matters.

Giving your girlfriend money instead of a gift is a bad idea. No wonder it's a bad idea around the world. It seems to me that the protagonist of the story doesn't understand women, to try to talk about money, or give her money the least ideal day of the year is Valentine's Day. And I am surprised by those who say that the one who did it wrong is the woman. They don't have a fucking clue about women either.

Perhaps it is not related to financial sensitivity as you call it. Perhaps this is a part of the personal nature of some people, whether men or women, who are sensitive to financial aid and refuse to take it because they have pride and believe that people pity them.

If your friend gave his girlfriend a gift, she would accept it and be very happy with it, even if it was only worth a few dollars, but giving her money instead of a gift may have made her feel that he pity her, and this is what caused her sensitivity and made her resentful.

Maybe the person that's gifted that money had no sense of timing, Valentine's Day is probably not the day that they should've taught their partner about financial responsibilities and how hard it is to make money. That day could've gone better if they just didn't mind that thing for that day.
Dude I got to agree with this somewhat because the preference for gifts on this kind of occasion varies by the age, if it's young adult then definitely money is probably the worst thing that you can gift to them but if it's in the middle age or higher, money wouldn't be the worst thing that you can give to someone. This is just me but most gifts that are given to someone dear to us or we loved shouldn't be that expensive or cheap, it's the thought that counts as the saying goes. Regarding your surprise about women, there's a joke that I've heard that says that women hate other women or something like that unlike men.

A normal circumstances a marriage is being determined by male gender and the secondly the responsibility of family should be carried along with both side but the most important person that is the head is the man in the family not the woman so every man in the family have more responsibility to take care of the family with its own money not a woman's money they functions of woman is to support to render help to the man so that there will be not be loophole for the family I think that many people misunderstood the functions of both parents for a family

In today's generation, most of the roles inside a home are equal, there are also many working wives who make money like their husbands, there are even a few who earn more wages than their husbands and I see nothing wrong with that as long as they do the same duties in their families. It's not a big deal now who earns the most, it's better that you both work, earn and take responsibility for your family especially since we know the hardships of life today, if you really want to save and improve your life, both of you should work together.

If it's your girlfriend, you should know her personality and what she likes and dislikes. You supposed to know her. Given that you have $50 budget for valentine's day, if you know your girlfriend is the type of person who likes receiving gift, you could've been thoughtful on what to give her. It's not about the amount, it's what will make her happy. With $50 you can give her something useful as well while adding effort, like a simple letter.

Yes, money is useful. But for valentine's day, it's kinda normal for women to expect something aside from money. Because thinking of something to give to your partner is also part of the effort which makes them feel loved. You can't say that a person lacks financial sensibility just because she expected a "gift" during valentine's and not money. It's a special day to celebrate love so like, at least show some effort... But there are people who appreciates money more rather than stuff with no uses. So you should really know what your partner likes. Consider the thought of the person you'll be giving a gift.

You noticed that too. I thought I was the only one who noticed. I also think that the OP's girlfriend is what he is referring to; he is just pretending to be girlfrined by other people, but this is just my guess. Valentine's Day has become a tradition in other countries, including our country.

For two partners, if they truly love each other, whether there is something to give or not, but they wish Happy Valentines to each other, I don't think there will be any problem with that. But if one of them gets angry or hurt, I think that one of them has not really understood the true meaning of a relationship.

If both husband and wife work together, it is very good. When both of them get salary at the end of the month, they will have a lot of money.  Having children but they have to face many problems. Like education will not be proper. Children will not have people to take care of children properly. I think no other person can take care of children like mother.

Each family is unique, and in our times the understanding that a man should provide for the family is a little biased, now there are quite a lot of successful women who can occupy good positions, or even manage a business and earn very well. For myself, I personally note that it is important for the husband and wife to manage the family budget together, if possible, then engage in joint business, this, to some extent, even holds it together.

A joint budget is joint plans and goals, for family it is important.

Generally this is humans for you, I think in this story you narrated, I will say that the girl doesn't necessarily love his boyfriend considering the fact that the young man has a good plan for his girlfriend but she isn't contented with what the guy offer her, this is mind blowing, how will a girl that is of know economic value at the moment show this kind of ingratitude, though I can see how concerned the young man is, but as it stands he should be very careful because the sign are clear that his girl friend does not not value his input in her life, though I wouldn't be the one to decide for him but I believe that he knows what to do.

Sure a man is meant to provide for his family with the help of his wife not his girlfriend, I know girlfriend graduates to wife but not in all cases, an ungrateful fellow does not deserve to be part of some good stuffs, all the burden of the family should not be shouldered by the man alone.

That's right, nowadays we can see that women can be as successful at their jobs as men and there are even some women who can still take care of their families even though they have jobs and this may not be able to be done by men, because men -men will only be able to look for work to be able to meet their family's needs and regarding the family budget, of course it would be better if it could be managed together because without managing the household budget it would be very difficult to save for emergency needs or investment plans.

Who made it that way and what society is that, if I may ask? Culture is made for the benefit of mankind and as such any culture that becomes antagonistic should be stopped. Yes, stopped. I believe there are enough exposed and learned folks in your society, they should see the need to weigh in and reveal that obnoxious part of your culture. Women are supposed to be helpmate and partners in progress, especially when in a relationship or married.

On the other side of the $50 story, I think your friend wasn't emotionally commited to his relationship. How else wouldn't he have had an idea what's top priority on his girl's worries rather than giving her that cash because he wasn't sure. Anyway, I don't even know what those who celebrate Valentine's Day benefit from that. I don't see any need for it because love is supposed to be an everyday thing, not a once in a year thing.

Lol, I don't know why I had a grin throughout the time I was reading your response, maybe because I agree with it.  ;D
You can't make a woman or a girl wait for the whole year for that single day having dreams and wishes about what you might give her on the special occasion and then expect her to be happy when you take out a $20 bill or a $20 gift card and give it to her.  ;D That's like shattering her dreams into countless pieces.
Even I wouldn't be happy with that if I was a girl, lol.  ;D
So, it's better that a man understands women better than to blame them for not being happy when they are given money.

sorry in advance, you are in the wrong position, not all women want expensive and luxurious gifts on Valentine's Day, small things such as flowers and other romantic items can definitely lift your woman's mood, women's minds are complicated and if you are in a relationship with someone in After a long time, you should already know what is on the woman's mind.
women are taught by their parents to have a relationship with someone who is great, someone who diligently earns money and responsible, even though you are rich and have a great job if you don't pay attention to your woman then believe me your relationship will be destroyed, after all a woman is still a woman, money is important but effort is much more important.

This is the nature of things and we as men must be truly prepared for this. It may seem sensitive, but as we continue our journey in life, the responsibility is not only for the flowers given to our partner in the future, but more and more, namely our children.

Indeed, it is necessary to find someone who understands, but over time getting money is also very difficult except for those who are lucky with everything. Yes. However, mutual sensitivity is also needed for balance to occur.

arguably in modern world, its not like that anymore, its all about being a partner, when it comes to financial condition in a family, partner will definitely try to fill up the lack of each other.
therefore when it comes to finance, both men and women that are in marriage definitely have their own freedom of earning money also spend it on their own but also understand that they are partner so the finance goes both way.
I think thats fair way of modern living these days, its not always the traditional lifestyles.
when it comes to this kind of thing like valentine, i think its more of tradition that has been passed down from generation to generation, men give gift to women, thats the essence of it and I think
what happened like what has been described by OP is that, the other side wanted that essence of tradition but the other side also think too much about the finance condition.
if you think about it, thanksigiving also is a tradition like valentine.

I disagree with you, giving your girlfriend money is not a bad idea if truly you want to marry the girl in the future because there are some things you will do to your girlfriend by giving her money to pay for her school fees, house rent, food items, clothes which are part of the things girls use to identify true love.


 Valentine day is a lover day which is very common to students in the campus and, if you don't use that opportunity to show your girlfriend love, you may loose your girlfriend because am talking from experience which girls don't use to listen to any  guy that fail to show love on valentine day.

Run! Just kidding, quite of a turn off in my perspective. First of all, a gift is a gift; meaning it comes through one's initiative and no matter what it is, it should be appreciated since the not all people will do the same thing for you. To be appreciated, you have to know how to appreciate first; that's the rule.
Money is indeed an option however, it is just right to demand for it? I highly doubt. We re talking about money as a gift. If she really needed money then she should have asked to borrow for it and to state her purpose of doing so, also on the other day given that celebration is a concern in the given situation.

Although it was mentioned that the money she hopes for will be used on educational purposes, would it be valid to somewhat ruin the celebration or the act and effort that a man still gave you something to show how he appreciate you? I will never be complaining of a gift especially from a person you often show your love to.

People want to feel valued by their partner or lover. There are many ways to show this. There is no special day to show appreciation. It is nice to show your appreciation for your loved one with gifts or surprises on February 14th or any day other than February 14th. Of course, there is an important point here and that is how much two people know each other.

You may have many role models around you, but every relationship has different details. Therefore, in such cases, it may be better to focus on how the other person can be happy rather than financial sensitivity. Financial matters are also important and individuals need to get along well with each other, this should not be forgotten, but there is a time for everything.

The gap between men and women is definitely shrinking, but it's not there yet. We still gotta fight for equal opportunities, no matter what's between your legs. That means everyone gets a fair shot, and nobody gets stuck doing stuff they hate just because of some outdated rules. Now, about sharing responsibilities. Forget the 50/50 stuff. Every couple's different, with their own strengths and weaknesses. Some might split the bills down the middle, while others might do it based on who makes more. The key is talking it out and being flexible, like a chameleon on a disco floor.

Instead of getting hung up on roles, think of yourselves as a team. You both bring different things to the table, and that's what makes it work. Respect each other, support each other, and figure out what works best for you. Equality ain't about flipping the script and making everyone the same. It's about giving everyone the freedom to choose who they wanna be and what they wanna do, without some dusty old rules holding them back. So ditch the labels, embrace the teamwork, and let's build a world where everyone can win, regardless of gender.

There are really partners who are just like this but in the sense that having that kind of demand or something that ask or demanded on something which is expensive then i could say that this is already that too excessive or something that wont really be right as a partner. Making demands as if you are really that having the rights when it comes to money is never been right. You both arent married and you are
still in a relationship and it would really be that shameful if you do ask out something just to make you feel that you are important? I cant imagine if i do have this kind of girlfriend specially that i dont have
much money for gifts or whatsoever.  ;D

So if you are really just that fine with this kind of behavior with your loved ones then its your call but if not then it would be also your decision
whether you would pursue this kind of relationship or not.

Another perspective is, she just wants to solve her problems on her won and doesn't want her partner to take responsibility for her financial needs which is a healthy event but as per OP statement, she wanted gift for that money is worth not just the actual money cause she feel money is irrelevant but the fact is money if the mother of all problems and solutions. As said, if this is happening more than a few times then better split in good terms and wait for the right partner.

This is a cultural thing as well. In some nations while women work a lot, in some other nations it's still a gap, men work far more than the women work. In those nations, women do not work as much, sure some of them do, but not as many of them as some other nations. Because of this, there is an arrangement between the guy and the woman, the woman stays at home, cooks meal, cleans, washes the dishes, cleans the clothes, irons, takes care of the child, all of these are still very very hard work, as someone who has been single for a while in my life, I can say that it's a great pain to do all those too.

However, because you have an agreement that she does that and you go work, it means you are responsible for getting her gifts during these special days, things she wouldn't be able to buy for herself. Cultural differences, it's okay to have multiple different type of cultures in this regard.

Men have a role as leaders and are responsible for providing for the people they love, including their wives or girlfriends who have been in a relationship for a long time. The spoiled and sensitive nature that cannot be separated from women means that men must be open to their partners in everything, including when they are experiencing financial problems. You must always be open with your partner about your financial condition. A woman who understands your situation will not demand things that you cannot fulfill.

Women must understand the situation their partner is experiencing, forcing their will or comparing their partner to other people will make men even more depressed. Romance doesn't have to be all about luxury, simple things can also be moments that are hard to forget if a woman can understand the situation her partner is going through.

One of the things that i dont really like is on really having that kind of comparison with other husbands specially within our relatives or even on friends on which it do really sucks on that case.
I havent been able to experience it though but having that kind of situation could really be leading up that kind of anger and frustration on having those kind comparisons.
Its true that whenever we do choose our loved ones or someone who do really want to be with us for the rest of our life then it would be someone who do really understands and knows you
and without having no sense of hiding something or whatever that pertaining into it.

On the time that these couples are really just that months old then im not really shocked that they would really be resorting into these kind of decisions for the sake of money.
They would really be that too easy for them to trash out that relationship since they arent still that too long for them to mind each other.
Money is almost everything.  :D

No doubt, comparing couples is low. Not only feeling inadequate or superior; missing the point. In relationships, there's no competition. They promote understanding, respect, and growth. Comparing your mate to others sets you up for failure. It's about you and your partner, not them

Money is important, but not everything. Early in a relationship, emotional investment is low, making it easy to end for financial gain. Money is transient. Real, deep, lasting relationships are about surviving storms together, not bailing out at the first hint of hardship. This is a character test, not a money strategy. Understanding this puts you ahead of the curve

Rules like that ain't practical anymore.

Your girlfriend is never your responsibility, especially when it comes to funding her education, because you're not even married, you're just dating. If your girl get mad at you because you didn't buy her gifts on certain occasion, leave her while it's still early. It's not mandatory for you to spend things on her, since you're still struggling with yourself, just spend the money you can afford to date someone.

Always remember that a girlfriend and a wife is a different thing, and there should be always a gender equality. If you pay for something, she should pay for something else in which both parties would be benefited.

Every person's financial situation is different. Some are financially well off, some are poor.  Now if a partner does not understand his financial situation and expects expensive gifts then she is not considered as an ideal partner.  You must expect your friend/husband/boyfriend financially.  Such demand is more observed among the girls of this age.  Of course, before choosing a partner, you should look at his mentality.  Choose friends considering your emotional similarity with yourself.

Yes, that's how most women are, indeed women tend to be sensitive, but i think she is only sensitive to the words of others around her and not sensitive to the finances and efforts of men who are her backbone. Sometimes they don't seem to appreciate their man's efforts if he can't fulfill their financial needs..I am reminded of the saying that a successful man has a great woman behind him. In essence, the woman in question must be a woman who supports behind the scenes.

There are person who are like that who value the moment more, more than the money but isn't it great? It means we can save more money on them, not only time though because we need to make an effort to make the things that they like happen but that still has a benefit and it can give us a good feeling.

It's important to save money for our selves so that we will have a better future, not only for us but also to our future partners and that person may not be the person who we are dating now this valentines. This is why it's important to be careful on who we are spending our money with because we don't know maybe they are only using us?

In our lives the responsibility for women only after they marry us and men do not have the responsibility for girlfriends regarding financial responses to their necessities of life.

I want to speak after marriage not when dating and we should direct women not the other way about those who regulate us. Generally, women prefer to be rewarded with their favorite items and that does not mean that the gift is given every week because when we are married there are times when we give gifts to our wife every time an important moment in the relationship. The husband also should not be too stingy to the wife because the source of sustenance sometimes also comes from his prayer, so giving a gift is something that is commonly done as long as it is not excessive.

If women are directed at the right path then I am sure they will ask for something based on appropriateness because in fact they understand the condition of her husband. It is precisely the woman who asked for great demands from the husband because of the husband's mistakes himself because it was too spoiled and not being a matter of heading as the head of the household.

I have a different take on this when you say wife or girlfriend. I think when we are still dating it is not our full responsibility, indeed we also need to give something that can make them happy, but in my opinion do not equate with what we will give after we get married again, or in other words we must have limits in treating a girlfriend. I do not mean to say that we should not give anything, but we must have a difference between treating a girlfriend and a wife later, I am sure you understand what I mean.
Many people experience bad things when dating, they give a lot of money and so on, but behind they even cheat with other men, or in the sense that they only take advantage of our sincerity. Unlike the case when we are married, it is our full responsibility.

Everything could really still happen since you arent still that engaged, this is why when it comes to gifts on which im not really that much making it too expensive. Love couldnt really be that shown
on how expensive your gift is and on the time that your girlfriend is already that having those kind of standards or trying out to be that asking for expensive things then i would say that its better to leave her
while its still early on which appreciating small things whether big or small, expensive or cheap then this is the qualities that i do look for.

If you do find out that it is really that going against your financial capability or something that you cant afford but in the sense that you love her and taking up some loans
already just to give out on what she wants or desires then this is where problems do rises gradually without you knowing until it gets bigger.
So better avoid while early.

I think this culture is not good to maintain, especially with unstable financial conditions and having to manage as best as possible for tuition or education rather than spending it on Valentine's traditions. If you are in a good financial position, it is not big problem when giving gift on Valentine's Day to a girl friend, but with unstable financial conditions and having to prioritize education money, I think the culture and demands for gifts on Valentine's Day can be eliminated.
Open your eyes and looking around which one most important in your life with not really well financial condition, love or your education, don't make your self more amazing if you get lack financial and bullshit with Valentine's Day you must gift more expensive for your girl friend except for your wife.

Thank you man, I totally agree with you because alot of person have forgotten the whole essence of these celebration because of the constant brainwash by the new trend of these generations about gifting and wasting money on material things. Over here in my country is even worst because you can't have a good relationship again without the lady completely blowing it off with material wants and demands. Social media is really doing things and it's probably the most influential place to be and most the whole society is falling to the syndrome and very soon the old habits of these celebration will be no more if not actually gone already.

Well right, we should really look for a partner who can appreciate us, not just look from the material side. I understand material is something important, but when our partner or our boyfriend or girlfriend has started to overdo it, it is better to consider carefully whether it is worth taking it to a more serious level or not, because after all, someone's true nature during dating in my opinion has not come out completely.
Mutual respect or understanding is the most important thing in a relationship, we cannot force our ego to always be in a position to be appreciated, while we do not give it to our partner, in my opinion it is something that is not wise at all.
Surely we will try to make our partner happy, but again there are certain limits if the status is still a girlfriend.

    In your story, your girlfriend seems materialistic. I think in that regard, you should accept that your girlfriend is like that. Because if you can't accept it in his personality, it's best to break up with her as soon as possible because she's materialistic, but this is just a piece of advice if you know to yourself that you don't love her for real.

    But if you love her, her materialistic nature is not an obstacle just to destroy the love you have for her, right? But I hope and should also accept for the woman you love what you can give her; she should be able to appreciate whether you have or don't have.

If his girlfriend is a woman, I think it is very common for women to have a materialistic nature. Because most women really hope that the man who loves them is someone who is able to give them more things, especially in terms of money and several other things. Meanwhile, men also want to see a woman who is really good and can support him when he is struggling to get money or whatever he wants. So men also very often choose and make comparisons with several women before making them their girlfriends in life.

If the love only comes from one side, or only comes from the OP as a man in that case, I don't think the love will last long if the boyfriend doesn't love the OP as a good man for him. So the woman won't last long with the OP if one day the OP is no longer able to fulfill what the woman wants, so the OP also has to think about this now so that her romantic path doesn't hit a dead end one day. Because love that lasts a long time is love that comes from both sides and will continue to want to complement each other in every condition in their lives.

The tradition of domestic expenditures and other social outings are often reposed on men worldwide. Also, the concept referred to as Breadwinner is akin to the male partner  in social relationship. But in the African continent in particular, it is the male who bears the burden of financial expenditures than the female counterpart.
However, in the case of valentine day, reason prevails that both sexes should agree on a certain amount to be spent before going out to resort centres. It should not be a road side picked partner.

Usually when people save money, it's not always for someone, but it's for things you want to get or sometimes it can be used for unexpected things that happen to us that part of the money is to solve the problem

that's why sometimes it's a big contribution that we have money saved so that we can grab something from our pockets during times of crisis, even if we don't ask for help from others.

I think he should be gifted so much that giving the gift will not cause any financial loss and he will be very happy to receive the gift. We have to calculate everything if we waste money on unnecessary work without calculation then there is a big risk of reducing our money.  We will always try to be considerate because it is very necessary for us to spend money wisely for the happiness of our family members.

You need to communicate with her, if both of you and her didn't find any solution, it's better to break up and find your appropriate spouse that has a same character and personality like you.

Did you mean @OP is gay? :D

You need to read the thread twice, @OP mentioned "girlfriend" and "she", not "partner" or "they".

This is how it is supposed to be, if the money is not available no need to spend money on Valentine, but some people have taking this Valentine' so special that if they don't celebrate it, it is as if they just want to feel among just to celebrate. This thing does not really matter especially when the money is not their, but if the money is available one can decide to enjoy the Valentine. 

Instead of stressing about who pays for what, have an honest chat about your financial situations and expectations. Are you both broke college kids sharing ramen noodles? Or maybe one of you has a part-time job and can splurge a bit more. Whatever your situation, open communication is key.

Remember, love isn't measured in dollars and cents. Grand gestures are nice, but thoughtful gestures matter more. Plan a picnic in the park, cook a romantic meal together, or write a heartfelt poem – it's the effort that counts!

If your partner keeps pressuring you for expensive gifts that are way outside your budget, it might be a red flag. A healthy relationship shouldn't feel like a financial burden. Don't be afraid to have a conversation about it, or even seek advice from a trusted friend or counselor.

I hope the guy doesn't keep her with him for so long or planning a future with her ? Because with the look of things this girl will leave this guy at her pleases once she finds a man possessing potentials that may likely be of her taste. By then this guy would be stranded and all efforts to make a future with her will be wasted.
Yes it is through that life is by choice of individuals deciding how to live it and who to live it with but the truth is that some persons are so confused and doesn't really know what they wants in life, they just wish to run over every vacant spaces and leaves again.

I believe if the guy has bought her a gift, it might not be up to $50 but because he knows this girl is having financial difficulties that make the guy gifted her with money instead of material stuffs.
Hence this girl accepts the gift from the guy, she would still come back and make demands of money to sort herself out without considering what it takes to make the money.
Some girls are like that. The guy should be grateful that she showed herself up in a manner that she can't economical and financially assist that guy when he needed it the most.

If the quality of that girl isn't what he wants, earlier the better, kick her off buddy.

Not in all nations. In my nation both me and my wife work and earn money and we are not making good money, I mean we make "good" money as in we are capable of surviving, but do not consider us rich at all, we are debt ridden at the moment for example and I had to cash out of my crypto investments multiple times in my life as well. Think about it this way, it doesn't feel like it's a big deal to you right now but when it happens you realize how big it could be, what if there is a sickness and you need to pay the medical bills?

Just recently there was an emergency that cost 5 thousand dollars, how am I suppose to find that? I do not make that in a month, let alone pay that. Thankfully insurance covered %90 of it, rest was easier to handle with debt.

How would you as a materialistic person sell your comfort of tomorrow for today's pleasure? Vision actually differs and just hope it works for us as thought.
In some situations of hard times, I would rather prefer a gifted funds how matter how little it may be than receiving gifted material not matter how expensive it may be as much as I'm in need of the money probably to sort some other problems that are essential to me.
Some persons would say (Let me have the expensive gift and I will sell it and have more money than the little fund I would had been gifted).
Honestly some person don't know how prescious a gifted material should be handled rather than trading with it after being gifted.
Yes, like I said, gifts are precious especially the materialistic items but we should know when we needed the materialistic gifts and when we are in need of funds to sort out financial problems.
This girl in question is in more need of money than the so called gifted. I believe the guy has got to know her background and financial state of health better than we could just imagine. Only that she doesn't know what is best good for her.
I just think some person's need tips about how they make choices in life.

Lol no need to create a whole new story, mate. I agree with her. Valentine’s day is not an event where you HAVE to give something materialistic but rather that gift giving is a representation of giving love which what the event is all about. She would have appreciated it even if you probably just gave her a handwritten letter and maybe cooked for her. Those things don’t cost a lot but it is thoughtful and caring. Giving cold cash feels like you are just throwing the money at her. If you really wanted to help her with money then just give it someday else not on valentine’s.

In my country, even men are demanding during valentine’s. They are even asking to be gifted motorcycles, shoes, and accessories. It all depends on what kind of relationship you have with your partner and what you expect from each other.

Actually most women do demand and are materialistic which men do as well  but not all of them are not having financial sensibilities. Being materialistic is based on personal preferrence for women and we men is for them a provider I mean women expects something from us either we spend money, time and effort to make them happy and contented because for them it is a measurement of how we care and love them.

Correct. Actually, from Op's story, it's not about financial insensitivity, it's just that men are less sensitive to big days or you could say the moment is not right. On Valentine's Day, of course women expect something different to look romantic, and of course small gifts such as flowers will make them feel loved and appreciated. If you want to give money or teach a woman about finances, you can do it the next day.

I think almost all countries are like this, on Valentine's Day giving gifts to your partner has become a necessity, it doesn't need to be expensive, the important thing is that he is impressed with our gift. I myself often give gifts and money to my partner on Valentine's Day.

Not that totally against women but when it comes on being materialistic then i would say that women do really love things and men isnt really just that too much if we do speak about this aspect.
If you do have a partner which is something like this on who do really loves on asking some expensive things the better think twice.This isnt something that you could really be with for the rest of your life
considering on how materialistic they would be then they are really that likely to be like that on the time you would get married and this is something that i dont like.

Someone who do have that kind of thinking about the future is something that i do want to be with. The ones who do think up sensibly about priorities and of course the ones who
are really that practical.It isnt really that bad to consider out some wants but on the time that you've been asked out or being stressed out on providing on whats been
asked then better think twice if you do really let that relationship go further.  ;D

I get that right and that's the reality. Most girls runs out of chasing their dreams due to the things of pleasures that glitters definitely the material stuffs. How funny a girl would look so classic walking by the road side like she has got to the height of her dream meanwhile she is just on that for formalities. Dip in, she doesn't have source of income and can't even provide a square meal for herself without relying on someone else.
How would a lady prefer to buy over $90 material items out of $100 in her bank account even at the state of her insured of when she could have another.
I'm not disputing that they don't deserve those material stuffs but my point is that they chooses to acquire materialistic items that accepting what matters more than the materials to them.
This is like when you buys a car and doesn't have the fund for maintenance or buying Petro in it but you depends on asking people to raise you money for your car needs. Bullshit!

The captain of the ship must be good at reading nature otherwise the passengers panic when a storm occurs. Yes. You are right in that it is very wise where calculations are needed and also where many people are often negligent and forget themselves when they are there and it is as if the critical period has disappeared. Money, whatever its name, if spent will continue to dwindle and run out if you remember, congratulations.

Even men do lack financial sensibility as much as the lady in your story. It's every man's responsibility to know the kind of woman they are in a relationship with because one thing is for certain, men die off quicker because of the stress of singly carrying the financial burden of his wife and entire family in many cases.

Still, in that your same country OP, am sure there are women who hold good positions in the society and there are women who handle their family financial burden because the man is either failing health wise or out of good income stream.

What do we think then of gamblers who have knowingly or unknowingly put themselves in financial jeopardy?

It depends on the individual and the exposure or experience they have gotten all their life, which of course revolves around money, to sharpen their mind and make them more financially sensible. Afterall, it is said that experience is the best teacher.

Well, its bad to make out some direct conclusions because i've known someone who do have that kind of women in relationship on which she's really loving on having those demands and later on
into their married life then she turned out to be responsible on handling out their finances which she had made out such adjustments and those practical approach on things on which it isnt really that just
right to make out those conclusions that women are really that spendors and not really having those kind of sense of responsibilities or whatsoever.

As a man and having that in relationship into a woman and sees out those things then its up to him whether he should really be continuing on having relationship with her or not.
It would really be on your choice but if you could be able to tolerate out such behavior then its your choice but you arent that dumb not to know on where
it would really heading if you wont be able to control it.

Therefore, returning to ourselves, when we have more fortune, we must be able to remember that when we experience economic difficulties, that way we can set aside money to buy something productive which will be useful to guarantee our future. . especially for young people who should be able to prepare for their old age. because the main factor is lifestyle which follows the increase in the results we have, so whatever income will be used up to follow the lifestyle, and most will regret it in their old age

To be prime caretakers. This can lead to a situation in which males feel pressured to be the breadwinners, while women may feel as if they are not contributing enough financially. This can lead to stress and misunderstandings, as your friend's scenario shows. However, it's crucial to recognize that not all marriages conform to these typical gender norms. Many marriages have unique financial factors, with both spouses sharing earning and caring duties.
When it comes to future generations, I believe we are already witnessing a trend toward more equitable financial responsibility. It's stimulating to consider how this will affect the generations to come and transform the community as a whole.

You're suggesting financial sense fails across the board, pinning it on everyone, but your whole "men carrying the weight" angle feels outdated. It ignores the fact that women often take on serious financial roles and burdens as well. Talk about a double standard

Now, on to the gamblers. Throwing everything into "they don't get money" is way too simple. Gambling's the ultimate thrill ride, a way to chase that high, sometimes even an escape from those burdens. Sure, experience might make them savvier about risk, loss... but does that translate to smart money moves? Or is it more a lesson in how unpredictable life can be?

Drop the tired gender roles and really dig into the underlying psychology and motivations here. We need to go way deeper than surface-level arguments about who handles the bills better

Indeed, it will really depend on a person's personality, those who have money to set aside for their future because we can't always have more money and if we can choose to set aside something productive, of course this will be very useful for our future. For some people who have a lifestyle that is not in accordance with the income they have, of course they will have great difficulty in meeting their needs because they will even experience financial problems if they cannot improve their lifestyle and the best thing is of course to set aside some of the income we have. have for our future and continue to live normally so that we don't experience difficulties when we get old.