i know it's against  todays experience.. but .. ..     to me looks like bullish. 

Here's the thing - I really like bitcoin.  Every time I actually use the system, I'm instantly reminded of why I thought this thing was so cool in the first place.  In a way, I've become a victim of my own trolling, just as some of you have suggested.  Here's my story.

I found out about bitcoin in late February/early March 2011.  A few weeks after investigating the idea I decided to start mining.  My decision to mine instead of buy outright was motivated by the fact that I was in the market for a new gaming PC anyway, and so mining was a sort of hedge against the market working against me.  I turned my machine off a few months after the 2011 crash.  I also bought a fair number of bitcoins before May 2011.

I was enthusiastic about bitcoin and new to markets and trading.  The 2011 crash was depressing and it changed me.  This, despite that I was lucky to more than double the number of bitcoins I mined and bought before the crash.  The project began to look like the sort of thing that was being torn apart inside an out.  I became a vicious troll, because, in a perverse way, I wanted to help what seemed like the project's inevitable end.

At some point my awful trollishness became too much and I issued an apology for my tone, but not my content.  I trolled on, just with less vitriol.  As the project recovered I began to fight with myself.  My trollish character had sort of developed a mind of its own, even as I began to appreciate bitcoin's innovation and value again.  I developed a sense of obligation to the community to post as Proudhon The Toll because of a community expectation and, in a way, to balance out over-zealousness with the same thing in the other direction.

When I switched gears and began posting bullishly not long after this most recent crash I was playing to the joke that I had become a sort of contrary indicator.  "Playing" the character of a more even-headed optimist made me realize that, well, that's not really a character, because I am actually optimistic about bitcoin, even if cautiously.

This is sort of a good-bye to the speculation forum, though I might stick around and respond here for a little while.  I intend to spend more time discussing bitcoin, and cryptocurrency in general, in political/economic/and philosophical contexts, and so you'll find me posting on bitcointalk.org and other places in areas more suitable for those sorts of discussions.  It's been extremely educational, depressing, exciting, frustrating, and fun around here.  I think I've ultimately learned what I needed to learn from the speculation forum - I'm not a bitcoin trader, I'm an investor and a user.  And yes, my paper wallets are safe and sound.