There was another person in this thread besides the one you quoted who was banned for asking how many units had shipped, not for being an asshole, so I would disagree on whether or not that idea is asinine, but anyway.... You completely sidestep my point here. What about the potential customers who are treated like shit for simply asking questions? Because that certainly is happening more often than cancelled orders. How does talking shit on forums, trashing the people who are trashing your company, and refusing to provide any citations for the claims you make fall under the umbrella of 'good service'? Not only does it show how concerned they are(not) with keeping customers happy, it damages their reputation as a whole which is also typically bad for business. Think about it, if a question that irritates Josh or whomever up there could be answered by saying 'Hey, we have addressed that, click here for more info.' - in that case then what type of business person would opt to just call that person an idiot instead, as they have many times over?
MT has it right, as you yourself say "behave in a manner that fosters feelings of mutual respect" - and I don't see that type of behavior coming from BFL. Not that that is an excuse for the way some people talk about them, but it is an excuse for me to not do business with them. You originally defended their right to not engage in an abusive customer-business relationship, and that holds true just as much as everybody has the same right not to engage in an abusive business-customer relationship. You may be great at keeping customers happy, but you aren't BFL, are you?
People need to be careful what they put in the public domain (you can be taken to court, this has happened several times recently for forum comments about companies). Clealry communicating with their customers is a bit of a problem for BFL, however, I believe they are doing what they can. Personal feelings can make people behave irrationally. You are investing in a new product in an emerging market. There will be many problems along the way. What do you expect?