[...] and then need two months to deploy an emergency hard fork if something bad happens.
Where do you get two months from? The last time there was an "emergency hard fork" situation the matter was resolved in ~ two days, IIRC.
From BIP-50:
Immediately
Release a version 0.8.1, forked directly from 0.8.0, that, for the next two months has the following new rules:
Reject blocks that could cause more than 10,000 locks to be taken.
Limit the maximum block-size created to 500,000 bytes
...
Over the next 2 months, send a series of alerts to users of older versions, pointing to the web page [that urged them to upgrade].
In other words the new version 0.8.1 was as restrictive as pre-0.8 versions for two months (i.e. an emergency soft fork against 0.8 to go back to the old rules) and the hard forking rule (allow larger blocks and more locks to be taken) was automatically deployed two months later (the first block that broke the old rules came five months later).
And in March 2013 when the accidental hard fork happened, 0.8 had already 60 % hash power on its side, so they only had to convince 40 % to upgrade.
A hard fork can only be successful if most miners and almost all merchants update. There is no chance you can get them to update in two days.