As several users will keep using the original BTC chain the most important point is to differentiate between the original BTC and the forkcoin BXT. In addition you might need to change your client to drop clients that deliver bad blocks. It make no sense to stay connected to peers that deliver garbage.
I agree that it makes no sense to stay connected to peers that deliver garbage. Hence my rather specific questions about how to authoritatively determine what software the peers you are connected to are running, how to determine (beyond the banner information provided in Electrum) whether the information they provide about the software the server you are connecting to is correct, which side of the fork an Electrum server is on, same question but for Core, and ditto for other wallets... people should be able to have (reasonably) simple instructions for determining how to avoid connecting to clients that are either old versions of Core or the XT (in any version).
The questions I have are, how? That is why I posted the questions in the way I did in my post above.
If the naming and the connection problem is resolved BTC can coexist with one or more forkcoins.
If it is clear that XT is going to "become bitcoin" so to speak then we want out of bitcoin before Jan. 11, 2016, so that we will not be forced into XT.
As long as BTC is alive, which means there are users and miners, BXT cannot become BTC. There is no need for you to go out of BTC.
The following is taken from digitsu99's post at
http://wallstreettechnologist.com/2015/08/19/bitcoin-xt-vs-core-blocksize-limit-the-schism-that-divides-us-all/"Why is this situation really bad? Because of the exact reason why Hard Forks are dangerous. If they have a consensus, they are resolved quite quickly with one fork winning over the other. (and it doesn’t matter which is longer!) That’s how it was resolved in the past, by unanimous endorsement by core to choose one over the other (and upgrade or downgrade accordingly). IF there is no clear winner, because each side wants to stick by their guns due to ideological reasons, then we have a problem. Why? Consider Alice, who uses wallet A, and Bob, who uses wallet software B. Wallets need to communicate with nodes to get their block confirmations. If wallet A is connected to a Bitcoin (John) chain node, and Bob’s wallet B is connected to a node running the XT (Judas) chain then they are no longer going to see the same block confirmations, and they won’t know about it! Alice will send bitcoins to Bob, she sees a confirm, but Bob will never see a confirm, if the coins are originally minted from a post-Judas block. If it is from Jesus block or less, then her transaction with Bob will work and be seen by both of them, BUT then Alice can re-spend those same coins with a counterparty on the John chain! (and this goes both ways). This breaks the fungibility of bitcoins, and will likely cause a massive loss of confidence of Bitcoin as payments will no longer be able to be reliably confirmed. Because both are operating on the same network (IP ports, QR codes, URI etc) there is no way to detect a-priori if your payment is being made to a receiver who can receive it, until after you try (or unless they are really tech savy and you both know which side of the fork you are on). This bad situation can happen as early as 100 blocks after Judas block. (about 16 hours). Much of the chatter in the social channels portraying the XT upgrade as perfectly safe seems to be deliberately ignoring this fact. And for understandable reasons. IF (and only IF) everyone does upgrade to XT, then we will have no problem."
Of course, I would not agree with the concluding statement that "IF ... everyone does upgrade to XT, then we will have no problem." The problem will be massive. Why? Because people that don't upgrade won't be able to spend their coins (at least not in the way that they once did; it will have set bitcoin progress back by years). The fork will have moved forward; Hearn has stipulated he is perfectly comfortable with leaving people behind if they don't upgrade to XT.
In the end however these details seem almost OT to the post.
I'm truly interested in answers to some very specific questions:
During a fork, or during an attempt to create a fork, how do you authoritatively determine:
1) which side of the fork an Electrum server is on
2) Same question but for Core, etc....
What are the ways to do this (ensure that you are actually connecting to a node running Core with most current version) for:
1) hardware,
2) desktop,
3) web, and
4) mobile wallets?
(Please provide examples, such as how you would do it for Electrum vs. how you would do it for Coinkite or Coinbase.)
Thanks in advance for any answers that specifically address these questions.