(game) BAS Satoshi

[Phinnaeus Gage]

I just registered Boi'gaaf

No, you registered Boi qaaf, with a Q

LMAO

Code:

I'm just a GQ type of guy, I suppose. BTW, Boi'qaaf is pronounced the way it is spelled. Updating Post #2 now.
Thanks, Psy, for the whitelisted. Feel free to scratch my character's chin anytime.

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[Boi qaaf]

Captian Eiran Or'll, I never truly thanked you for snatching me from the all male nymph planet Rengaw, thus allowing me to be the sole 'The Pleaser' aboard your fine vessel. Remember, if ever you change your mind and desire me to open up for you, it'll be on the house. I think that flashing red light marked 1A1zP1 means something, therefore I'll leave you now.

[BurbolGii]

Boi qaaf? You, here?!

My head is still dizzy, can't remember clearly...

Last thing I remember is you and PSY-BOT leaving that bar with that goat...

Regarding my debts: Don't worry. I will pay you. I know a guy who will give me 5% per week. Everything is fine. Just give me a little time. No need to tell secrets.

BurbolGii

[Phinnaeus Gage]

BurbolGii, you scrumm brockett. A deal's a deal, but I give you more time. No tell nobody about goat, please. Secret tight with me, as always. You now need to get back to work on that refactor delay. Captain may need it when we reach Uull IV to stock up on gollotium. If you need me, I'll be in my quarters practicing for the eight-prong gargle competition.

[caffeinewriter]

Code:

Of course my first instinct was to look it up on firstbits.

I quickly think of the hundreds of millions of credits on my chip, wondering why people still bothered to use them, when the obvious choice would be to use the intergalactic currency of Bitcoin. I quickly scan the light with my HUD glasses, offering up a payment screen. I transfer ten Bitcents, or approximately 800,000 credits worth of Bitcoins, to the projected address. In the back of my mind I question why I picked up Boi qaaf up off that damned planet. If he were a female, this would be a different story, but on that planet, all of them are kind of androgynous, and to be honest, I originally thought he was, until he decided to bare himself to me in the head almost a thousand lightyears from his planet. Too late to take him back. I quickly look at the piraTunes icon in the corner of my HUD Glasses, triggering the exec. After a few milliseconds, the program finally loads.

Damn, I think to myself, I need to upgrade the processor soon, but the damned merchant wants five hundred million credits for the processor download.

I could pay for it in Bitcoins, but the exchanges are deemed illegal by the ECA, (Earth Credit Authority) and they recently increased their detection rate, so as attractive as it would be to "cash out" some of my Bitcoins, I don't want to risk the credits being confiscated and my chip being frozen. After a second, I decide on some oldies. Skrillex to be exact. As the music begins to stream through my implanted bone vibration speakers, I finally get the damned email that had been waiting for me at the 1A1zP1. After the last free email provider, Gmail, shut down after being sued by the HPAE (Holographic Picture Association of Earth) and SMIAE (Streaming Music Industry Association of Earth) for being a means for filesharing, emails got much more expensive, and not a whole lot faster. In fact, due to the filtering algorithms that the HPAE and SMIAE put in place on the internet to prevent the illegal transfer of files, it took almost eight seconds for the email to reach point B from point A.

The email reads:

Proceed to sector 121.24.29154.

Status: Blackbird

Classified except to A4 Level Operators

People are so talkative these days.

- Eiran Or'll

[Ifseg Arkaz]

Captain,

sorry for not reporting back earlier, but I was stuck in decontamination and my manual override was not accepted.

Status:

I replaced the capacitors and all systems are working well.

The damaged was no accident! Someone messed with some fuses and created a short circuit, which fried the capacitors.

This whole place here looks like hell, empty flaccs bottles laying around everywhere and obviously even some scooba was smoked.

It even looks like somebody slept here.

[SgtSpike]

**************************************
I REPEAT

I AM DARQIST HEMT, LEADER OF THE SHARDEN.

YOU ARE SURROUNDED.

YOU WILL SURRENDER IMMEDIATELY.
**************************************

[BurbolGii]

Boi qaaf is so stupid. I hate the refactor delay... It's so boring, even PSY-BOT could do it...

If only he didn't know the secret...

Hihi, I feel so smart today. I could pay him my debts right now. But the guy really said he would double my amount each week.
Only wait a while, pay Boi qaaf back and I'm rich and never have to work for him again. Only flaccs and scooba... scooba...

Let's do what he said for a while... maybe later I can play with the funny wires again. That techy almost saw me, I have to be careful.

BurbolGii

[Ifseg Arkaz]

Holy Sh***,

we surrounded by sharden ships.

Captain, what shall we do? Fu*** where is everyone. Damn it, Captain now is not the time to play "Angelinas secret Fruit" on the Holo Deck.

*Hmm, seems like it all depends on me now*

*****************************************************
LEADER OF THE SHARDEN.

THIS IS THE BAS SATOSHI

WE ARE ON A PEACEFUL MISSION AND NEED TO PASS YOUR TERRITORY

LET US PASS

IF YOU THREATEN ANY FURTHER WE WILL NOT HESITATE TO USE FORCE

RETREAT NOW
******************************************************


*Hopefully that doesn't make things even worth. Anyway time to start that targeting computer*

---Beep! Captain password rewired---

*Well, lets see.* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

---Beep! Wrong Password---

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAB

---Beep! Wrong Password---

Sigh, this is going to take a while.

[Phinnaeus Gage]

Try BAABAABOBEEP. I heard that that was the password once used for everything on this ship until someone had the foresight to change them all to triple quantum verification.

[Ifseg Arkaz]

BAABAABOBEEP

---Password accepted. Self-destruction activated---

You Bastard!!!

Cancel, cancel, cancel!!!

[SgtSpike]

**************************************
I AM DARQIST HEMT, LEADER OF THE SHARDEN.

YOUR REQUEST TO PEACEFULLY PASS THROUGH
OUR TERRITORY IS NOT GRANTED.

YOU ARE SURROUNDED.

YOU WILL SURRENDER IMMEDIATELY.
**************************************

[caffeinewriter]

"Fuck! My interface interpreter is down for a day, and you almost blow up the ship? Let me fix this. EXECUTIVE OVERRIDE: CODE: [expletives removed]"

--- Emergency Override Accepted : Self Destruct Sequence :ABORTED: ---

"Now let's see." I switch off the radio. "Eject the self destruct core, jettison it with the trash. Aim it towards Darqist Hemt's ship. The Sharden are far from intelligent, so they have bully psychology. You take out their leader, you take out the rest of them. It's a shame I won't get the credits he owes me. Ifseg, if you can connect to their SPACECOM-RPC Bitcoin Daemon, we can drain their account. It's not like they'll need it for much longer anyways, and there'll be a nice bonus in it for you."

I switch the radio back on.

"Darqist Hemp, you have one more chance to surrender before we blow your shitty little ship out of the sky."

- Eiran Or'll

[Boi qaaf]

How hell we surrounded with only one ship? When we capture DARQIST HEMT, can I be first to taste his qaafums?

[caffeinewriter]

How hell we surrounded with only one ship? When we capture DARQIST HEMT, can I be first to taste his qaafums?

Of course, but they may be quite crispy. And we're surrounded by multiple ships, but the Sharden are approximately as intelligent as a bowl of quaznush. By taking out their leader, the others will just give up.

[SgtSpike]

These stupid, foul animals.  They do not know we have spent the last four hundred years developing cybernetic enhancements capable of reading their thoughts.

**************************************
I AM DARQIST HEMT, LEADER OF THE SHARDEN.

YOUR THREATS ARE EMPTY.

YOU ARE SURROUNDED.

YOU WILL SURRENDER IMMEDIATELY.
**************************************

*Targets self destruct core with photon cannon*
*Fires photon cannon*
*Core is destroyed*

[caffeinewriter]

Wha... What? How did he know we were jettisoning the core? How? Dammit, he must have some kind of ESP.

[Ifseg Arkaz]

Captain, may suggest, that let out some warp-plasma and and create a plasma explosion, that will set our and their sensors offline for a few minutes.

We can use this to escape or to get behind them and attack from behind while all are blind.

[caffeinewriter]

Do it, but if we all die, I'm blaming you. And do you think you could hack their SPACECOM-RPC Bitcoin Daemon? Or will my poker debts remain unpaid?

[Ifseg Arkaz]

Ejecting Plasma now. Be prepared for a though ride.

Also, I have successfully hacked them. But... there are no funds, these sharden are totally broke, maybe that's why they want our ship.

Ejection completed, we have 83% Plasma left.

And explosion.

http://www.bildburg.de/gifmotions/images2/gif_explosion_010.gif