North Korea Lands A Man On Saturn

[notbatman]

North Korea Lands First Ever Man On Saturn, Confirms Central News Agency

It’s been confirmed that North Korea has become the first country to land a man on Saturn. Hung Il Gong made landfall on Saturn at approximately 3 a.m. this morning. He was in a specially designed, one man spacecraft that the North Korean’s have had under wraps for the last decade.

Upon landfall, Hung performed tests and navigation exercises from within his craft. Three hours later at 6:03 a.m., Hung deemed it safe to step outside and take a space walk.

Hung proceeded to proudly mount the North Korean flag on the planet while giving a muddled short speech praising Kim Jong-un for providing the opportunity to represent his country in such epic fashion.

A live television broadcast aired play by play audio of the events as they unfolded. A State news anchor said, “We are proud to announce our Saturn Space Mission a success! No one has ever done what North Korea has just done. Our hero, Hung Il Gong, is now mounting the North Korean flag on Saturn as I speak.”

A major welcoming home party is scheduled for 10 p.m. tonight when Hung is scheduled to fly his spaceship back home. He will meet with Kim Jong-un upon immediate return, reportedly bringing back dirt and rock samples as souvenirs for the supreme leader.

This recent accomplishment has launched North Korea to the top of the global space rankings, while North Korean officials are calling the epic space mission “the absolute greatest human achievement of all time.”

http://www.nymeta.co/north-korea-saturn/

Wow, the USA and Russia are really falling behind in the space race.

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[Balthazar]

Most of "north korean" news are actually published by the south korea for trolling purposes. If you like to serve someone as a tool, then just continue in the same way.

[BADecker]

Probably, in a flat-earth view of things, Saturn wouldn't be that big, and it wouldn't be that far away.

In America, there are a lot of Saturns.

[Spendulus]

North Korea Lands First Ever Man On Saturn, Confirms Central News Agency

It’s been confirmed that North Korea has become the first country to land a man on Saturn. Hung Il Gong made landfall on Saturn at approximately 3 a.m. this morning. He was in a specially designed, one man spacecraft that the North Korean’s have had under wraps for the last decade.

Upon landfall, Hung performed tests and navigation exercises from within his craft. Three hours later at 6:03 a.m., Hung deemed it safe to step outside and take a space walk.

Hung proceeded to proudly mount the North Korean flag on the planet while giving a muddled short speech praising Kim Jong-un for providing the opportunity to represent his country in such epic fashion.

A live television broadcast aired play by play audio of the events as they unfolded. A State news anchor said, “We are proud to announce our Saturn Space Mission a success! No one has ever done what North Korea has just done. Our hero, Hung Il Gong, is now mounting the North Korean flag on Saturn as I speak.”

A major welcoming home party is scheduled for 10 p.m. tonight when Hung is scheduled to fly his spaceship back home. He will meet with Kim Jong-un upon immediate return, reportedly bringing back dirt and rock samples as souvenirs for the supreme leader.

This recent accomplishment has launched North Korea to the top of the global space rankings, while North Korean officials are calling the epic space mission “the absolute greatest human achievement of all time.”

http://www.nymeta.co/north-korea-saturn/

Wow, the USA and Russia are really falling behind in the space race.

Couple of minor, insignificant glitches in the story.

Such as the fact that Saturn is a gas giant style of planet and has no "surface" to land on.

[croato]

Well, trolling or not, most of "news" from North Korea makes me laugh (except of news related to their rocketry and nuclear program lol).

[yampi]

They should land one the sun next.

[Beliathon]

Nuke Saturn.

[zivone]

Weird but I find this really funny. Anyway, send Kim Jung-on to Saturn then.

[bryant.coleman]

Most of "north korean" news are actually published by the south korea for trolling purposes. If you like to serve someone as a tool, then just continue in the same way.

At least the South Korean trollers are not perverts like the Americans and the British. I stopped watching The Interview mid way, as I found it very distasteful and gross. Meanwhile the life goes on as normal in North Korea, with the common people not having any idea about the enormous information warfare which is going on.  

[panju1]

What is the big deal??
Isn't this a satire article?

http://www.nymeta.co/about/

[Balthazar]

Most of "north korean" news are actually published by the south korea for trolling purposes. If you like to serve someone as a tool, then just continue in the same way.

At least the South Korean trollers are not perverts like the Americans and the British. I stopped watching The Interview mid way, as I found it very distasteful and gross. Meanwhile the life goes on as normal in North Korea, with the common people not having any idea about the enormous information warfare which is going on.  

Isolation from warfare has some interesing side effects. They're very hospitable and gentle people. For example, if you will knock into a random door and ask for a glass of water, no one will refuse. But you need to learn korean first, of course.

[MTBTT]

Next goal = land man on the Sun

-Kim Jong Un

[Balthazar]

Next goal = land man on the Sun

-Kim Jong Un

http://mic.com/articles/80001/did-north-korea-really-claim-to-land-a-man-on-the-sun-here-s-the-full-story#.incDKOlZx

[notbatman]

Most of "north korean" news are actually published by the south korea for trolling purposes. If you like to serve someone as a tool, then just continue in the same way.

So I'm a tool of the imperial capitalists of South Korea am I?

I'm hurt that you would make such a baseless and unsubstantiated claim. Praise the supreme leader for his monumental achievement.

[notbatman]

North Korea Lands First Ever Man On Saturn, Confirms Central News Agency

It’s been confirmed that North Korea has become the first country to land a man on Saturn. Hung Il Gong made landfall on Saturn at approximately 3 a.m. this morning. He was in a specially designed, one man spacecraft that the North Korean’s have had under wraps for the last decade.

Upon landfall, Hung performed tests and navigation exercises from within his craft. Three hours later at 6:03 a.m., Hung deemed it safe to step outside and take a space walk.

Hung proceeded to proudly mount the North Korean flag on the planet while giving a muddled short speech praising Kim Jong-un for providing the opportunity to represent his country in such epic fashion.

A live television broadcast aired play by play audio of the events as they unfolded. A State news anchor said, “We are proud to announce our Saturn Space Mission a success! No one has ever done what North Korea has just done. Our hero, Hung Il Gong, is now mounting the North Korean flag on Saturn as I speak.”

A major welcoming home party is scheduled for 10 p.m. tonight when Hung is scheduled to fly his spaceship back home. He will meet with Kim Jong-un upon immediate return, reportedly bringing back dirt and rock samples as souvenirs for the supreme leader.

This recent accomplishment has launched North Korea to the top of the global space rankings, while North Korean officials are calling the epic space mission “the absolute greatest human achievement of all time.”

http://www.nymeta.co/north-korea-saturn/

Wow, the USA and Russia are really falling behind in the space race.

Couple of minor, insignificant glitches in the story.

Such as the fact that Saturn is a gas giant style of planet and has no "surface" to land on.

And the Moon is a hologram projected on the roof of the dome with no surface either. That didn't stop the USA from landing a man on it.

You're making a mountain out of a molehill here.

[bryant.coleman]

Isolation from warfare has some interesing side effects. They're very hospitable and gentle people. For example, if you will knock into a random door and ask for a glass of water, no one will refuse. But you need to learn korean first, of course.

The Western nations has imposed all these sanctions and embargoes on the Korean people in order to punish Kim Jong Un. However, these sanctions are not hurting Kim in any way. Only the common people are suffering. And this makes the ordinary Korean angry, when faced with the pro-Western propaganda. Why should you believe anything from the Westerners, when they are making your life miserable?

[onemorexmr]

Isolation from warfare has some interesing side effects. They're very hospitable and gentle people. For example, if you will knock into a random door and ask for a glass of water, no one will refuse. But you need to learn korean first, of course.

The Western nations has imposed all these sanctions and embargoes on the Korean people in order to punish Kim Jong Un. However, these sanctions are not hurting Kim in any way. Only the common people are suffering. And this makes the ordinary Korean angry, when faced with the pro-Western propaganda. Why should you believe anything from the Westerners, when they are making your life miserable?

the problem is: which propaganda is true?
koreans or westerners? i am from germany and i dont believe both

EDIT: this reminds me of german history: WW2 americans dropped food and sweets while NAZIs claimed they dont and tried to shoot the planes.... you simply cant believe a country when it comes to propaganda

[Balthazar]

So I'm a tool of the imperial capitalists of South Korea am I?

Yes, you are. And you are doing their business for free.

I'm hurt

Mediocre minds usually dismiss anything which reaches beyond their own understanding.

Honestly, I don't care.

baseless and unsubstantiated claim.

Did you tried to find a source of your "article" before spreading the bullshit here? What makes you to think that my claim is baseless or unsubstantiated? What makes you to think that your "article" is more reliable than this one?

Praise the supreme leader for his monumental achievement.

The fact that Kim has a slightly inflated self-esteem doesn't give you an ability to convert a delusion into reality. Pretty simple to understand for anybody. If you're unable to understand that, then you're either tool or fool.

Nothing personal, but people like you are directly responsible for millions of civilian casualties in Syria, Libya, Ukraine, Iraq and so on. You need to think about possible consequences of your actions before helping to spread the another propaganda "article".