[FAIL] Granola Eatin' Nature Boy

[Spoetnik]

HUMANITY FAIL !

- Whole Grain Bread.

I don't think so..

You're doin' it wrong.. who's bloody idea was it to put whole grains & seeds etc in my bread ?

YA like i was sitting there thinking my bread is crappy i wish there was random hard chunks of shit in there like little rocks.
AWESOME !

I am sick & fucking god damn tired of all this healthy granola eatin' nature boy style food.
Like i almost bought Cheddar Cheese the other day from the store but after picking it up i noticed
on the corner of the label it said "Lactose Free"
? LACTOSE FREE ? WTF IS THAT SHIT ?
There is suppose to LACTOSE in cheese you stupid fucking cunts !
WTF ?

One time before i bought a huge chunk of Cheddar and after i opened it at home
i noticed the fine print.. "FAT FREE"
Marvelous..  
It was fucking gross !
It was rubbery and shitty.
Where the fuck is my fat bitches ?
You tubby ass fat cunts can't stop shoveling food down your gaping maws so i have to have shitty food now ?
I also have been suckered into buying bottles of POP from the store that i noticed
after i got home it said "also Contains Sucralose"
Thanks fat assholes.. i can't have sugar because you treat food's like a drug and act like a fat junkie ?
Rather than ruining all my food put the fork down you god damn fat pieces of shit !
And jam your Diet pop and politically correct gluten free fake allergies bullshit up your moronic millenial ass's !
Your all a new age of whine baby suck hole crap lords hell bent on fucking up society with your faggotry..

I don't need fat free or sugar free food.. i need food as it always has been.. TASTING GOOD.
If you stupid fat pricks can't learn to put your fork down and shut your god damn cake hole ?
Then get your tubby food-junkie ass's into a 12 step program and pray to Jesus for the will to resist the evil temptation of a chocolate bar.. you stupid fucking fat ass faggot pussies.

People are stupid.. there is nothing wrong with sugar and no it doesn't cause cavities either idiots.
And if you avoid the bad cholesterol your body simply makes it anyway..
Same thing Scientists found with Aspertame (fake sugar)
Scientists found out that not only does it increase the chances of getting cancer but..
Your body treats it EXACTLY like it is real sugar anyway.. so it defeats the entire bloody purpose of using it !
AND NO Sweet & Low / Aspertame does NOT taste anything like sugar or sweeten things.. your idiots if you think that.

STOP wrecking my food you tubby ass granola eatin' nature boys !

If i want fiber i would go out side and grab a mittful of fucking god damn twigs and gnaw on that for an hour.

MMMMM YUUMMMMMY FIBER !!!!!!!!

You stupid fuckers wanna go out into the woods and eat twigs & rocks & dirt & shit picking flowers fine..
BUT LEAVE MY FUCKING FOOD ALONE FAT BITCHES !

[rigel]

LOL
You are right!

The problem is: we have too much food easily available so people get too fat and need to replace real food with that shit.

BTW, how old are you?
The older you get the worst the abundance of food is.

[Spoetnik]

LOL
You are right!

The problem is: we have too much food easily available so people get too fat and need to replace real food with that shit.

BTW, how old are you?
The older you get the worst the abundance of food is.

41 this year..

many many years ago my step sister got caught hoarding a secret stash of cookies and muffins etc
She has always been over weight and you can ALWAYS see her eating.. while she "SAYS" she eats very little.

It has been a long standing inside family joke about having "muffins under your bed"
because she did LOL

Then when i go grocery shopping all i see is garbage.. fat free this high fiber that.. gluten free.. this lactose free that.

I am 6 foot 4 and fairly thin.. never been fat ever.
And one of my room-mates is bigger than me and he says WOW your gonna eat all that every time i eat LOL

I also don't snack.. i eat meals then STOP eating.
Some people seem to carry on snacking non stop while eating meals on top of that too
I also eat when i am hungry not based on what time it is..
And that works as a sliding scale.. a pattern of sorts.

If i had to guess i would say i eat roughly three meals per 24 hour period.

I also have MORE opinions !!! 

I have watched drug abuse and experienced it first hand.
Ever seen a crack head eating too much ?
I swear to god a lot of people really do treat food like a drug and get a high off of it.
and in turn, EAT TOO MUCH !

Some people need to start abusing drugs i think.

And don't get me wrong i don't mind healthy eating but it has it's time & place.

When i feel like a grilled cheese sandwich i want cheese slices white bread & margin. (the proper way of doing it)
Real cheddar is not as good as the slices that resemble plastic chemically LOL
Sometimes some whole wheat bread is good with a sandwich etc
But i usually like and really enjoy white bread.. it TASTES good !
Ya.. That's right !
I admit I LIKE WHITE BREAD ..i am coming out of the closet and NO i am not ashamed either !
I even consume sugar as much as i want.. i admit it !

Anyway i wish they would not ruin the food on me.. just get people to eat the "bad" food in moderation.

Well.. it's dinner time i have to go collect sticks & twigs n' shit from my backyard.. mm yummy FIBER !!!!

[Gleb Gamow]

who's bloody idea was it to put whole grains & seeds etc in my bread ?

Probably a dude who spreads crunchy peanut butter and raspberry preserves on bread to made a sandwich accompanying pistachio pudding for dessert.

[High Plains Drifter]

Spoetnik, you are in rare form today.  Nice to see you again.  I have a rule:  No fat free stuff, no "light" stuff, no sugar free stuff, no gluten free stuff, no diet stuff and nothing that Spoetnik wouldn't buy himself.  I can always walk down the street and burn a few extra calories after gorging myself.   

[JesusHadAegis]

Its for business off course. what else

[Spoetnik]

LOL i knew someone here HAD to agree with me

And Gleb i enjoy me a peanut butter & jam sandwich but i would go for smooth not chunky (my teeth are bad)

Like i am sure it has to be the same all over the world not just my country Canada..
The same overly mega healthy trendy bs.

I told my room-mate a story in the kitchen not long ago.. i think you will all find it amusing too 

I told him i was making a sandwich with whole wheat bread and i ranted a bit about this topic here
then i told him.. you know what man ? i was thinkin' and it occurred to me..

The current FIBER trend with bread (like how it's advertised on the package in huge letters bragging about high fiber content)
I said fuck man back in World War 2 in Leningrad the city was under siege by the NAZI's
and they had to use paper fiber / cellulose from paper mills as well as things like dirt..
to stretch out the food rations for the city's dying population trapped there.

So i told him pointing at my gay loaf of Whole Wheat bread.. and said so WTF is this shit ? Am i in Leningrad ? Is this WW2 ?
I said this is what fucking poor desperate starving people did during World War II.
NOW ? They put FIBER!!! onto package advertising as some grandiose major feature of the product.

Seriously people for the love of God.. WTF is going on ?
What are they doing to Food these days ?

They might as well put the faces of WW2 concentration camp victims on the plastic bread bag..
Dempsters 78 grain bread - Ultra High in Fiber - 50% Recycled Paper Cellulose - Camp Auschwitz approved

AND.. they will charge me $6.50 for the loaf of bread on sale too !
Don't get me started on the price increases ohhhh booooy

Box of Kraft Dinner ? $3
Contents = a palm full of noodles with fake cheese powder with orange food coloring and no flavor..
You can't tell me it costs them anymore for production than it did in like the 90's.
Per box manufacturing whole sale they prob cost them 10 cents a box after packaging printing.
that would be 10 cents cost and $2.90 profit !
AND.. over time the product has gotten worse & worse too.

Same shit with "Mr Noodles" etc etc..

The planets food makers are super greedy pieces of shit and i want to slap them in the face ! 

[Gleb Gamow]

LOL i knew someone here HAD to agree with me

And Gleb i enjoy me a peanut butter & jam sandwich but i would go for smooth not chunky (my teeth are bad)

Like i am sure it has to be the same all over the world not just my country Canada..
The same overly mega healthy trendy bs.

I told my room-mate a story in the kitchen not long ago.. i think you will all find it amusing too 

I told him i was making a sandwich with whole wheat bread and i ranted a bit about this topic here
then i told him.. you know what man ? i was thinkin' and it occurred to me..

The current FIBER trend with bread (like how it's advertised on the package in huge letters bragging about high fiber content)
I said fuck man back in World War 2 in Leningrad the city was under siege by the NAZI's
and they had to use paper fiber / cellulose from paper mills as well as things like dirt..
to stretch out the food rations for the city's dying population trapped there.

So i told him pointing at my gay loaf of Whole Wheat bread.. and said so WTF is this shit ? Am i in Leningrad ? Is this WW2 ?
I said this is what fucking poor desperate starving people did during World War II.
NOW ? They put FIBER!!! onto package advertising as some grandiose major feature of the product.

Seriously people for the love of God.. WTF is going on ?
What are they doing to Food these days ?

They might as well put the faces of WW2 concentration camp victims on the plastic bread bag..
Dempsters 78 grain bread - Ultra High in Fiber - 50% Recycled Paper Cellulose - Camp Auschwitz approved

AND.. they will charge me $6.50 for the loaf of bread on sale too !
Don't get me started on the price increases ohhhh booooy

Box of Kraft Dinner ? $3
Contents = a palm full of noodles with fake cheese powder with orange food coloring and no flavor..
You can't tell me it costs them anymore for production than it did in like the 90's.
Per box manufacturing whole sale they prob cost them 10 cents a box after packaging printing.
that would be 10 cents cost and $2.90 profit !
AND.. over time the product has gotten worse & worse too.

Same shit with "Mr Noodles" etc etc..

The planets food makers are super greedy pieces of shit and i want to slap them in the face ! 

Your teeth are bad? You're lucky. You still get use the plural when referring to them gnawers. That said, pass me a partial bag of them munchies you have at your ready while reading this post in non-default mode off your TV from across the room.

[Spoetnik]

You want some of my NAZI bread ? sadly i just finished off the cookies

I got a new TV for the computer too while back.. 32 inch 1080p Flat screen (but i use 720p)
It's so much easier to see now

I think you know your old when you bitch & moan about all NEW things are gay ?
Back in my day blah blah.. LOL

My ex-GF and her chick friend called me a Curmudgeon one day and i had to Google it.. they were right.

Gleb there doin' it wrong man jeez !!!

[Gleb Gamow]

[FAIL] Granola Eatin' Nature Boy

YA like i was sitting there thinking my bread is crappy i wish there was random hard chunks of shit in there like little rocks.
AWESOME !

It was rubbery and shitty.

Where the fuck is my fat bitches ?

You want some of my NAZI bread ? sadly i just finished off the cookies

I got a new TV for the computer too while back.. 32 inch 1080p Flat screen (but i use 720p)
It's so much easier to see now

I think you know your old when you bitch & moan about all NEW things are gay ?
Back in my day blah blah.. LOL

My ex-GF and her chick friend called me a Curmudgeon one day and i had to Google it.. they were right.

Gleb there doin' it wrong man jeez !!!

Dude, is this your 'coming out' thread? If so, you're brave and there's nothing to be a shame of. 

[Spoetnik]

Ohh jeez i woke up with a wicked toothache killing me right now eh
but when i seen that picture i thought OH MY FUCKING GOD and started to laugh ahhaha
yeah i know who that is.. You Culture Clubbed me bro ROFL

I have a few that need work but i keep putting it off so they keep coming back to haunt me.
I haaaaaate Dentists ..and spiders !
And i got what i think is the root cracked so i keep thinking it's healed
then eating some hard as food.. Triscuits crackers before bed for example (felt fine 100%)
then oh deer god the pain man when i woke up.. holy shit !!!

Dentists are evil and they work for Satan.. what kind of mad man WANTS to rip your teeth out ?

Anyway you gonna WHAM me next ? George Michaels ? Tears for Fears ?

I was just reading this actually..
http://www.neowin.net/news/teens-see-windows-95-react-as-innocently-as-you-imagine

Time flies.. when your having fun (or bitching & complaining)

[High Plains Drifter]

About a third of one of my teeth broke off about two months ago.  I've mastered the art of chewing on the other side and avoiding anything hot or cold.  While the pain is not too terribly egregious, it seems to be moving around to my other teeth and now I have an earache.  I have resisted getting it pulled until now because I don't think the dentist can get it out without cutting it out and I don't want to deal with that.  I also suspect that the dentist will try to talk me into some fancy work which will fill his pockets instead of looking out for my best interest.  Greedy bastards