It is a commonly-held scientific speculation that beards grow faster on men who haven't had sex in a while. If you see a man with a very long beard, he probably needs a girlfriend.
Wrong.
I know these people are allowed to marry more than one woman. Same as with Muslems they marry up to 4 women and I think they have a lot of sex because they make up to 6 or more children from a single women. They almost all have long beards so this scientific proofs is not true for the case.
Mine was a satirical post but here are a couple of salient points:
2) Greg Maxell is not Amish.
1) The Amish are not polygamists.
Edit: sorry to rain on your otherwise humorous thread Gleb.