Insults for Sale .01 BTC

[Ilikeham]

I have seen all kinds of scams, schemes and overpriced shenanigans for sale on the forum. I am generally an amiable fellow, given more to laughter than anything else however I have developed a repertoire of insults after being on the interwebs for such a long time.

For the princely sum of .01 I will insult you with a well crafted sentence or two. If you wish a longer roasting, supply .05 and I will go on at some length about your failings.

If you would like to partake in this process, please remit your payment to 12hSyF6Ja1XS5eHwAtThdhtCKUrgix2equ

As to those who may disapprove, i have only this to say; "If I want any lip from you, I'll rattle my zipper" .

Warmest Regards,
Ilikeham

[SgtSpike]

How about a good old roasting for a 3rd party?

[Ilikeham]

Sure, give me some basic details (age, gender, weight, living arrangement, vehicle, favourite food or game - things like that) and I'll certainly do what I can.

[RyNinDaCleM]

This is a pretty funny idea!
I think the Sarge was talking about certain, specific people of this forum! 

[Ilikeham]

This is a pretty funny idea!
I think the Sarge was talking about certain, specific people of this forum! 

Thanks, I'm all for a laugh. If it's someone on the forum, it's just a matter of scanning the last batch of posts by the user and picking up some details and opinions they hold. The nice thing about being roasted is that it starts with a grain of truth (a factoid) that is then used out of proportion or in the most insulting way.

Such as

This is a pretty funny idea!

Not only is Rynin is the type of guy who really enjoys laughing at other peoples misery but I also have it on good intelligence from his Mom that he's been using the TIM for his video cards as lube for wanking to mining stats. Arctic Silver on ever pair of boxers in the wash don't ya know....

[RyNinDaCleM]

Nice! 
See! You've been hosed! I didn't even have to pay for that!

WIN!

[Ilikeham]

Naw I figured if I was going to sell a service people should see I can do a little leg work, thanks for being a pig.

Oops I mean guinea pig. Must have been a Freudian slip. 

[RyNinDaCleM]

Freudian slip "aye"? That is some thought process...Coming from the country with the highest rate of mental illness in North America!
 

[Ilikeham]

Freudian slip "aye"? That is some thought process...Coming from the country with the highest rate of mental illness in North America!
 

You either mean "eh" or you're a sailor. Let me know. On second thought, if you're a sailor, your jaw is likely too sore to talk. I'll just assume the spelling is a result of having the highest rate of high school drop outs in North America and give you the benefit of the doubt.

Seriously, last one have a good day