Operation: Corporate Bitcoin Funvangelism [help wanted]

[Kluge]

Goal: [1] Send an exceptionally eye-catching introduction to small-medium corporations which may be open to accepting Bitcoins for their goods or services. This introduction needs to make it either to the targeted executive or someone with the necessary authority. [2] Try setting up an in-person meeting between the target and a competent local emissary to first explain Bitcoin and its benefits, then to help support its implementation with recommendations of locals familiar with implementation and regulatory challenges.

Impression sought: Supernatural entity demanding full attention toward subject matter. It needs to demonstrate organic community excitement toward Bitcoin, as well as unprecedented interest by the community in the company.

Ideal targets should

• sell products directly to consumers
• have >$5M annual revenue (effect substantial # of people)
• have <$250M annual revenue ("dangerously" unlikely mail won't reach target VIP)
• have a fun business culture and work environment where efforts would be appreciated
• be some type of "specialty" producer (no "general goods" like Amazon or eBay, which sells almost everything and would be difficult to tailor for)
• Have substantial BTC community support

PM/email/Skype if you're interested in contributing (current needs for projects are listed in post #2 - no financial donations are currently requested). Payment for goods or services may be requested, though I probably won't be able to offer market rates on work.

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[Kluge]

Current Targets



Paradox Interactive (Sweden), Fredrik Wester (CEO)
Summary: A wooden, displayable, small-scale longship is to be delivered to Paradox's HQ in Stockholm by Ludvig. The longship will be stuffed with goodies from Bitcoin businesses (to show, rather than tell, the diversity of businesses supporting BTC), and include a square cotton sail on the mast. Painted on one side of the sail will be a Nordic-themed Bitcoin logo (currently need someone to design this), and on the other side will be various Bitcoin businesses which contributed free or subsidized product. Along with gifts, the longship will contain an envelope containing a "primary letter" I have written, which goes over contact information for the local emissary (Ludvig), very briefly explains Bitcoin, gives contact information for Swedish BTC-oriented lawyers, accountants, and ecommerce developers, goes over a few benefits, and argues why Bitcoin is a good fit for Paradox as they launch their new web store. The desired result is an in-person meeting between Wester and Ludvig to fully explain and sell Bitcoin to the target. Included in this envelope, I'd be pleased to also include letters written from Paradox customers encouraging acceptance of Bitcoin.

Have - Local emissary (Ludvig/Deadterra), someone to paint the cotton sail, primary letter content [RD1, WIP]
Need - longship, gifts, customer letters, meet location in Stockholm

-reached out to Joerg Platzer for help in putting this all together

Current Sponsors (at-cost or free gifts):
Bees Brothers (Maybe)

[Kluge]

Previous targets (delivery date, initial response, end result):
none

Scheduled future targets:
none

[Kluge]

Reserved.

[prophetx]

I am not exactly sure what you are looking for but I may be able to help you given my experience in technology business development and sales.

[Kluge]

I am not exactly sure what you are looking for but I may be able to help you given my experience in technology business development and sales.

I'm currently only looking for the design of a Nordic-themed Bitcoin logo to have painted on a sail, and personal letters of encouragement (for Paradox's Wester) from users of both Paradox products and Bitcoin. Looking for a woodworker to build a small-scale longship, too. There is likely still plenty of additional space in the undesigned longship for additional advertisers/gift-givers, though I think it's reasonable to hold off engaging them until the longship is constructed. Finding someone to carve out a longship will likely cause the greatest delay, since it'll probably be impossible to find a BTC-passionate woodworker interested in the job near-cost for BTC, where costs can probably be significantly lowered due to the charitable nature and potential for advertising. Delay is really in me giving up on that pipe dream and paying cash at retail for it to be built.

Sorry thread is so incoherent. Idunno what's wrong with my brain the past week or so, but everything I've typed lately comes out a disorganized mess, missing details, and rife with errors. Probably just syphilis. I'll go back and try fixing some of it soon. ETA: Cleaned up the thread as best I could. ETA2: Deleted too much. Fixed (hopefully).

[prophetx]

I would help you out as long as you find a virgin who willingly consents to being sacrificed as part of this voyage.

 

[Phinnaeus Gage]

Something like this?

[Phinnaeus Gage]

Probably like this, though:

[Kluge]

Something like this?

That's exactly what I was thinking, though I really doubt oars could survive shipping without asking Ludvig to do assembly-work when it arrives in Stockholm, when he's already offering to do a lot.

Didn't realize that in my frenzy to delete everything not wholly relevant, I deleted link to where I'm asking for a woodworker. https://bitcointalk.org/index.php?topic=308738

[prophetx]

i'm currently in south sweden near a naval museum, i am sure that for enough btc (say 1000 btc and a stockpile of beer and vodka) i can convince some swedes to "borrow" a ship very much like this one and row it up the coast.  just keep in mind that the waters around stockholm freeze during the winter so time is of the essence.

[Kluge]

i'm currently in south sweden near a naval museum, i am sure that for enough btc (say 1000 btc and a stockpile of beer and vodka) i can convince some swedes to "borrow" a ship very much like this one and row it up the coast.  just keep in mind that the waters around stockholm freeze during the winter so time is of the essence.

Hmmm... snag a college kid and offer him $184 to "borrow" a longship from a museum and row it to Stockholm and you have a deal + 10% finder's fee.

[prophetx]

i'm currently in south sweden near a naval museum, i am sure that for enough btc (say 1000 btc and a stockpile of beer and vodka) i can convince some swedes to "borrow" a ship very much like this one and row it up the coast.  just keep in mind that the waters around stockholm freeze during the winter so time is of the essence.

Hmmm... snag a college kid and offer him $184 to "borrow" a longship from a museum and row it to Stockholm and you have a deal + 10% finder's fee.

The swedes are not so cheap, as you know their work to pay ratio is very skewed

And I charge 25% mgmt overhead, plus a piece of any spoils

[Phinnaeus Gage]

Something like this?

That's exactly what I was thinking, though I really doubt oars could survive shipping without asking Ludvig to do assembly-work when it arrives in Stockholm, when he's already offering to do a lot.

Didn't realize that in my frenzy to delete everything not wholly relevant, I deleted link to where I'm asking for a woodworker. https://bitcointalk.org/index.php?topic=308738

The oars are not a problem. Simply supply the oars in a separate bag of which all that'll be needed for assembly is sticking them into holes on the sides of the ship. All the oars would be the same size, so there's no way to get it wrong. Would take less than two minutes to complete.

I liked the sail because of sun in the center of which would be replaced with some Bitcoin logo/design you may have in mind. My brother-in-law can easily do the sail in hand-tooled leather.

[Phinnaeus Gage]

Better yet, retro one of these: http://www.amazon.com/Viking-Drakkar-24-Longship-Assembled/dp/B002YLIQHW

[Kluge]

Better yet, retro one of these: http://www.amazon.com/Viking-Drakkar-24-Longship-Assembled/dp/B002YLIQHW

Cool beans. I asked if they're able to customize it directly - doubling size, removing the "floor," and providing a blank sail. Their mast is already designed to be detachable and re-attachable. A hand-tooled leather sail is pretty freakin' attractive of an idea, too. I'm kind of hoping they say they can't provide a blank sail for some reason.

[Kluge]

Dealer kindly referred me to the manufacturer. They happily handle custom orders. Waiting on an estimate.