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Author Topic: Post shit that brings tears to your eyes.  (Read 772 times)
Phinnaeus Gage (OP)
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February 23, 2014, 07:13:01 PM
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http://www.theonion.com/articles/superstitious-man-puts-bag-of-trash-outside-house,35333/

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PHILADELPHIA—Admitting that his long-held superstition was a little bizarre, local man Colin Dowd told reporters this morning that he always makes sure to place a bag of trash outside his house every single Thursday. “I know it’s kind of odd, but for several years, I’ve had this complex ritual where I have to tightly tie up that week’s bag of garbage, carry it down the driveway, and put it at the exact same spot on the curb,” said the exceedingly superstitious man, adding that his peculiar routine also leads him to obsessively collect plastic, metal, and paper containers during the week, which he is then compelled to place in a separate blue container that he also brings out the same day.

“It’s quirky, but gathering up my household refuse into a black trash bag—always a black one—is something I just have to do pretty much every week, except during the holidays. And if I’m out of town, I’ll always get a neighbor to go through with the ritual for me. I just have to. Sure, it doesn’t make a whole lot of sense, but it’s just the way I am, you know?” Dowd added that on those rare occasions when he forgets to observe his outlandish custom on Thursday, he frantically scrambles to do so early in the morning on Friday.

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February 23, 2014, 07:39:31 PM
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I need a shit this morning that's gonna bring tears to my eyes. It was curry last night for dinner. Don't think I'll post it, though.

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February 23, 2014, 08:17:05 PM
 #3

why does this bring tears to your eyes?

the guy is just taking the trash out Cheesy

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February 23, 2014, 08:36:56 PM
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why does this bring tears to your eyes?

the guy is just taking the trash out Cheesy
Have you ever taken the trash out?
It's really painful, about 2 kicks in the nuts painful..

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February 23, 2014, 08:39:44 PM
 #5

why does this bring tears to your eyes?

the guy is just taking the trash out Cheesy
Have you ever taken the trash out?
It's really painful, about 2 kicks in the nuts painful..
hahha Cheesy

so here's something else that brings tears to our eyes Cheesy


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February 23, 2014, 08:41:44 PM
 #6

why does this bring tears to your eyes?

the guy is just taking the trash out Cheesy
Have you ever taken the trash out?
It's really painful, about 2 kicks in the nuts painful..
hahha Cheesy

so here's something else that brings tears to our eyes Cheesy



Close, but no cigar.

Still around.
Kiki112
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February 23, 2014, 08:47:33 PM
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why does this bring tears to your eyes?

the guy is just taking the trash out Cheesy
Have you ever taken the trash out?
It's really painful, about 2 kicks in the nuts painful..
hahha Cheesy

so here's something else that brings tears to our eyes Cheesy



Close, but no cigar.

man dafauq is wrong with that website, this did bring tears out of my eyes, tears of laughter xD


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February 23, 2014, 09:09:20 PM
 #8

why does this bring tears to your eyes?

the guy is just taking the trash out Cheesy
Have you ever taken the trash out?
It's really painful, about 2 kicks in the nuts painful..
hahha Cheesy

so here's something else that brings tears to our eyes Cheesy


How fitting when the article was linked from theonion's website.
Punny.

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February 23, 2014, 09:26:57 PM
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 Cry Cry Cry Cry Cry
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February 23, 2014, 11:15:39 PM
 #10

Onions unless I'm chewing on something which kind of counteracts it.

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