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Author Topic: Top Ten Signs You're a Fundamentalist Christian - Merry Christmas to all!!!  (Read 836 times)
af_newbie (OP)
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December 24, 2018, 02:09:59 PM
Last edit: December 24, 2018, 04:10:11 PM by af_newbie
Merited by Flying Hellfish (10), bones261 (1), cabalism13 (1)
 #1

Top Ten Signs You're a Fundamentalist Christian:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
10 - You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of gods claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence of yours.

9 - You feel insulted and "dehumanized" when scientists say that people evolved from other life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt.

8 - You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Triune God.

7 - Your face turns purple when you hear of the "atrocities" attributed to Allah, but you don't even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in "Exodus" and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in "Joshua" including women, children, and trees!

6 - You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky.

5 - You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (few billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a few generations old.

4 - You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs -- though excluding those in all rival sects - will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most "tolerant" and "loving."

3 - While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in "tongues" may be all the evidence you need to "prove" Christianity.

2 - You define 0.01% as a "high success rate" when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% FAILURE was simply the will of God.

1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The above list can be also applied to Muslims or Jews with small corrections.  Just replace the atrocities, name of the holy book and the name of the religion.  All other details apply equally.

PS.  Few bonus signs:

1. You constantly reinterpret and redefine words like slavery, stoning, killing or murder to make sense of the sadistic passages in the Bible.
 ... more to follow ...

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December 24, 2018, 03:57:46 PM
 #2

... and ordered the elimination of entire ... and trees!

No one ever talks about the trees.  They had it bad too but are completely forgotten in history LOL!  Wink

Dogma that exploits fear and encourages group think in any form is really dangerous. Religion is just the most successful and thus most horrific example because.  Fear keeps animals alive, it is our most primal of instincts to fight or flight and that decision is purely based on a fear expectation result.  In order to reduce a fear based reaction which we hate because they can lead to death if wrong, a lot of animals find protection in groups, it comforts them immensely.

How about adding to the list at 11 something like.

You think that "re-branding" words from the bible like slavery to a really good social security program for its time somehow changes the meaning of the words and texts!

I wonder how many "Christians" know the name Yaweh without looking it up! just a little buttress for #1
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December 24, 2018, 04:11:46 PM
 #3

... and ordered the elimination of entire ... and trees!

No one ever talks about the trees.  They had it bad too but are completely forgotten in history LOL!  Wink

Dogma that exploits fear and encourages group think in any form is really dangerous. Religion is just the most successful and thus most horrific example because.  Fear keeps animals alive, it is our most primal of instincts to fight or flight and that decision is purely based on a fear expectation result.  In order to reduce a fear based reaction which we hate because they can lead to death if wrong, a lot of animals find protection in groups, it comforts them immensely.

How about adding to the list at 11 something like.

You think that "re-branding" words from the bible like slavery to a really good social security program for its time somehow changes the meaning of the words and texts!

I wonder how many "Christians" know the name Yaweh without looking it up! just a little buttress for #1

re: trees
"Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire."
"Only the trees which you know are not fruit trees you shall destroy and cut down"

I added your point about the reinterpretation and redefinitions of words.

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December 24, 2018, 08:29:25 PM
 #4

Christianity gives us happy christmas holidays, what holidays has atheism given us Grin

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December 25, 2018, 07:00:29 AM
 #5

Christianity gives us happy christmas holidays, what holidays has atheism given us Grin

Stalin's Birthday Celebrations?

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stalin%27s_cult_of_personality
Quote
Joseph Stalin's cult of personality became a prominent part of Soviet culture in December 1929, after a lavish celebration for Stalin's 50th birthday. For the rest of Stalin's rule, the Soviet press presented Stalin as an all-powerful, all-knowing leader, and Stalin's name and image became omnipresent. From 1936 the Soviet journalism started to refer to Joseph Stalin as the Father of Nations.

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December 25, 2018, 02:31:12 PM
 #6

Can we upgrade all religions if needed?  Smiley for example

Jesus Pro
Islam 2.0

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December 26, 2018, 07:17:48 AM
 #7

Can we upgrade all religions if needed?  Smiley for example

Jesus Pro
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Please describe these upgrades, how are they different from the original?

af_newbie (OP)
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December 26, 2018, 03:36:41 PM
 #8

Can we upgrade all religions if needed?  Smiley for example

Jesus Pro
Islam 2.0


Please describe these upgrades, how are they different from the original?

1. You only have one life to live, use it wisely.
2. Don't shit where you eat.
3. Be nice to nature, nature will be nice to you. 
4. Trust, but verify.
5. Be skeptical, don't trust your senses or gut feelings.

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December 26, 2018, 03:49:10 PM
 #9


2. Don't shit where you eat.


Hmm...

How to phrase this?

Hmm...

Is it really a divine rule and all? Yeah? M'kay

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December 26, 2018, 03:51:40 PM
 #10


2. Don't shit where you eat.


Hmm...

How to phrase this?

Hmm...

Is it really a divine rule and all? Yeah? M'kay

Don't pollute water, air, and soil.

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January 02, 2019, 07:30:57 AM
 #11

Can we upgrade all religions if needed?  Smiley for example

Jesus Pro
Islam 2.0


Please describe these upgrades, how are they different from the original?

It was supposed to be a joke but if one wants to upgrade an existing religion doctrine then start with the basics which OP pointed out in the descriptions 10-2. Christians can update easily if they really want to because the way I see it they are very much engaged in this type of discussion. so maybe in the next 100 years or so will see some modification in Christianity.

Coming to Islam, there is no space for any kind of upgrade or even discussion in Islam because according to Muslim it's perfect and doesn't need any modifications. so no discussion Period!
Founder of Islam played a long con when he said that he's the Last Prophet. 

Happy New Year. i hope you guys had fun with your loved ones.






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January 02, 2019, 07:44:54 AM
 #12

Serious question, when did the proselytizing wing of atheism start? For people who are so against religion, you sure seem to be keen on forming your own.
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January 02, 2019, 09:38:48 AM
 #13

Top Ten Signs You're a Fundamentalist Christian:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
10 - You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of gods claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence of yours.

9 - You feel insulted and "dehumanized" when scientists say that people evolved from other life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt.

8 - You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Triune God.

7 - Your face turns purple when you hear of the "atrocities" attributed to Allah, but you don't even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in "Exodus" and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in "Joshua" including women, children, and trees!

6 - You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky.

5 - You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (few billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a few generations old.

4 - You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs -- though excluding those in all rival sects - will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most "tolerant" and "loving."

3 - While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in "tongues" may be all the evidence you need to "prove" Christianity.

2 - You define 0.01% as a "high success rate" when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% FAILURE was simply the will of God.

1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The above list can be also applied to Muslims or Jews with small corrections.  Just replace the atrocities, name of the holy book and the name of the religion.  All other details apply equally.

PS.  Few bonus signs:

1. You constantly reinterpret and redefine words like slavery, stoning, killing or murder to make sense of the sadistic passages in the Bible.
 ... more to follow ...

there is not just right and wrong when it comes to religion, they might all be correct, they are simply different frequencies

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January 02, 2019, 07:37:22 PM
Last edit: January 02, 2019, 08:00:34 PM by ATMD
 #14

I don't understand where atheism gets its morality from? What is stopping an atheist from stealing, lying, cheating etc? There is no karma, no God, no punishment.

The normal answer I get is that a person who cheats, steals, and lies would be condemned by the society that he is living in, so it would make sense that even an atheist would act moral.

But what if he can do it without the knowledge of anyone? What if nobody could ever catch him because he is simply too clever? If he could get away scot-free every single time, what is stopping the atheist from being morally corrupt?

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January 02, 2019, 09:23:48 PM
 #15

I don't understand where atheism gets its morality from? What is stopping an atheist from stealing, lying, cheating etc? There is no karma, no God, no punishment.

The normal answer I get is that a person who cheats, steals, and lies would be condemned by the society that he is living in, so it would make sense that even an atheist would act moral.

But what if he can do it without the knowledge of anyone? What if nobody could ever catch him because he is simply too clever? If he could get away scot-free every single time, what is stopping the atheist from being morally corrupt?

Some of us are born with this thing called empathy.

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January 03, 2019, 03:53:40 AM
 #16

Christianity gives us happy christmas holidays, what holidays has atheism given us Grin

Doesn't holidays but the way we celebrate is kinda more fun unlike the others, can't eat pork, can't drink beer wines, doesnt have christmas, celebrating ramadan just for the muslims, etc... We can celebrate all of them without any worries.

Nothing has been considered as holidays for us but we are the true nature of being neutral at all times, we dont even need holidays just to celebrate anything  as we also have birthdays, anniversaries and so on...



As for the OP.

[+1]

Nailed it.Cool
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January 03, 2019, 08:43:46 AM
 #17


Some of us are born with this thing called empathy.


Yes, many of us are in fact, good humans with a sense of responsibility, care about others, have empathy etc.

I am not talking about us, I am talking about the humans who are criminals, thieves, murderers, how can morality be taught to them? They don't believe in our morality of empathy, they think it is weak.

Their morality is survival of the fittest etc. They will steal if they have to, lie if they have to, kill if they have to, in order to fulfill their needs. If they can get away with it every time, what is stopping them from continuing to do so?


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January 03, 2019, 01:17:19 PM
 #18


Some of us are born with this thing called empathy.


Yes, many of us are in fact, good humans with a sense of responsibility, care about others, have empathy etc.

I am not talking about us, I am talking about the humans who are criminals, thieves, murderers, how can morality be taught to them? They don't believe in our morality of empathy, they think it is weak.

Their morality is survival of the fittest etc. They will steal if they have to, lie if they have to, kill if they have to, in order to fulfill their needs. If they can get away with it every time, what is stopping them from continuing to do so?

We have developed a secular legal framework, incarceration, rehabilitation etc. to deal with such people.  Notice that churches never run prisons or punish criminals.   Instead they "forgive them" as long as they join their cult, pay the price.  Truly sickening to see them protecting the rapists and pedophiles.

Raising a child is more than forcing him/her to memorize the 10 commandments and scare them with hell and eternal damnation.

How many MS13 gang members were born in Christian families? All of them.  Clearly, you need more than the imaginary hell to raise a well-adjusted child.

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January 03, 2019, 03:01:23 PM
 #19

Yes af_newbie, we do have a great legal framework, incarceration, rehabilitation programs to deal with such people, but these would be effective only if the person gets caught.

The question is if the person could get away scot-free every time, let's say he is extremely clever, so clever that he is able to commit crimes without leaving any tracks and never gets caught, what is stopping him from being morally corrupt?

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January 03, 2019, 04:22:26 PM
Last edit: January 03, 2019, 04:37:50 PM by af_newbie
 #20

Yes af_newbie, we do have a great legal framework, incarceration, rehabilitation programs to deal with such people, but these would be effective only if the person gets caught.

The question is if the person could get away scot-free every time, let's say he is extremely clever, so clever that he is able to commit crimes without leaving any tracks and never gets caught, what is stopping him from being morally corrupt?

When a person does not have any empathy for others and does not care about the law, nothing can stop such a person.  Ask all the priests who molested young boys.

You cannot convince such people that hell exists. If they are smart enough to avoid being caught, they are smart enough to figure out that religion is for suckers.  Fairy tales for old people.

Not sure what are you getting at?  

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