You did well in some aspects and you definitely fucked up in some aspects of your younger years. We are pretty much bound to make such mistakes in our younger years simply due to us being dumb and careless. All you can do right now is to take these experiences and learn from them, and make sure to not the same mistakes in the future.
Also, back to the begging part that I said last message ago, just do your best and to learn a skill through the internet. May it be programming, design, writing, or whatever. There's a lot of free information out there and there's no excuse for you to not learn some of them. Best of luck!