Do you have this practice of gambling during one's wake

[Ojima-ojo]

We have something similar to this in my traditions and is lega, but the timing differs from what you explained, in your own case, the game is organized during the mourning time, but mine is an organized game and there used to be time interval from when the bereaved family members approve for the game to be played.


In my region, only close friends of the deceased person will play the game to honor the departure of the friend and sometimes those friends are those in the age grade of the dead person, all bets and wins go to the family and the family has the responsibility to entertain the friend with foods and drinks during the game period of the game, its more or less a game festival for them

[MAAManda]

This is legal in our country provided that you ask permission from authorities, they allow gambling like card games and color games they allocate a fee, or what we call in our country a "tong" for the family of the bereaved so they can cover the expenses of the family during their hard times.
Do you have a similar practice in your country and is this legal in your country?

I often play games during the wake to keep up with friends and relatives of the bereaved this is to sympathize with the family, these are friendly games and the tong will help the family, it's been with this tradition ever since in our country, and I believe it will keep on as long as there are families who need to cover expenses of the family's who are left.

The word "Tong" is familiar to me, do you mean by "our country" here is Indonesia? If the answer is "Yes", I'm Indonesian too and this is the first time I have heard of this tradition, does this have anything to do with a particular religion or tribe?

It makes me confused because in our country gambling is completely prohibited, especially when gambling is done in the real life.

[maydna]

Perhaps, it's common in some areas or countries but in the other countries, that is uncommon practical or don't have that traditions. I don't know if that is existed here but so far, i never met that traditions. Oh, perhaps I knew something that similar with the story. When someone died, many people comes and not sleep all night long just to sympathize with the family. Usually, they only sit and talk with each others remembering the old days with the person who died. But young people, perhaps 20+ will playing gambling just to pass the time. They do that to show their respect to the family and guard them until the ceremony is finish.

[Churchillvv]

Not familiar with this, never heard of it before I guess it's my first time and most people from Nigeria too.

here in my country there other cultural activities that happens during the wake but gambling is not one of them. although its peculiar to your country that is why culture is dynamic, but for my country we have different ethnic groups and different activities are conducted in each ethic. I can remember something I noticed while I was very much younger, where after about 4 days after the deceased has been buried the family will gather of a night and kinda stay up all night but I don't know what it is that we really do but I know we just stay discussing and somehow mere till next day.

[EluguHcman]

This is legal in our country provided that you ask permission from authorities, they allow gambling like card games and color games they allocate a fee, or what we call in our country a "tong" for the family of the bereaved so they can cover the expenses of the family during their hard times.
Do you have a similar practice in your country and is this legal in your country?

I often play games during the wake to keep up with friends and relatives of the bereaved this is to sympathize with the family, these are friendly games and the tong will help the family, it's been with this tradition ever since in our country, and I believe it will keep on as long as there are families who need to cover expenses of the family's who are left.

So strange to my knowledge. Is it that the gambling commission or the gambling sites accumulates your lost of stake while gambling and give it back to the gamblers families in returns? Or is it that the gambling extracts someone little funds out from your gambling funded wallet as a form of pension for expanded coverage during your Financial difficulties?
How is this considered being realistic? Although I am not in doubt but curious on the Possibilities.

[kotajikikox]

¿Cara y/o Cruz? Are you talking about Spain or Latin America? As I understand, this practice during the wake seems to be more common in Filipinas, Indonesia... but the name of the game you mentioned is in Spanish (isn't it "head or tails", or simply coin flip in English?), so I'm curious where are you writing for.

At least in Spain I have never heard about similar practice during the mourn (I have to confess that, fortunately, I have never been in one) so, as you all said, it seems something more cultural from certain regions than a general practice in different countries.

You are correct that this is a Spanish term about Head/tail but in the local game they uses 3 same coin so the flipping will be harder as you need to produce 3 same outcome(head/tails) in which sometimes taking long time before the result comes.

And correct maybe this is different from  your culture but in Asia specially in the Philippines ? this mostly taking place specially in poorer community/family that they need to gather extra funds(as it is expensive when someone passes away) so the tip from gamblers are very important in each mourning.

[Oilacris]

This is legal in our country provided that you ask permission from authorities, they allow gambling like card games and color games they allocate a fee, or what we call in our country a "tong" for the family of the bereaved so they can cover the expenses of the family during their hard times.
Do you have a similar practice in your country and is this legal in your country?

I often play games during the wake to keep up with friends and relatives of the bereaved this is to sympathize with the family, these are friendly games and the tong will help the family, it's been with this tradition ever since in our country, and I believe it will keep on as long as there are families who need to cover expenses of the family's who are left.

For sure we are living on the same country or not since this kind of approach is something that been traditional mostly on southeast asian countries or i dont know if this one does exist on other countries as well but having this kind of culture on having that "tong" isnt really that bad. Actually when it comes to wake then i do really play out in together with some other relatives and friends. I dont mind much about on how much amount would be pooled as long this one could really be helping out into those family who do have such situation or problem considering that even burial expenses and other correlated things would really be something that would be talking about money. Unless if the said family is rich then they might not really have those tongs or whatsoever in those mourn moments.

Actually its not really that a bad thing to have on which we know that not all families are really that good status when it comes to money on which on the time that they would really be having this kind of conditions then they do take up some loan specially on burial expenses and other things. It might really not that big or depending on how many had been playing but at least those amounts would cover up something when it comes to those small expenses.If you are someone whose really that going into those wake and having that kind of consideration then you could always opt on giving
out directly on the affected family.

[Natsuu]

Well basically in some places, it's common to play games during funerals to support the grieving family. People contribute a fee to help cover expenses. Whether it's legal depends on local rules and traditions so it's good to keep things in line with what's accepted in your area. In my country, playing games during wakes and pitching in is a common thing and it's called sugalan. It's like a community way to help out the grieving family with expenses

[aioc]

This is being practiced in the Philipines and it is a tradition, a way to gather all your friends the best way to do is to play games or gamble for fun they need to have something to do during the wake the whole night, outside of the house there is gambling going on its for the benefit of the family the winner take a share of his winning and share it with the family and they donate it to the family to help shoulder the expenses.
It may look weird to some who do not understand how these things can be possible but every country has its ways of doing things so we should respect the tradition and how they carried it.

[Die_empty]

This is legal in our country provided that you ask permission from authorities, they allow gambling like card games and color games they allocate a fee, or what we call in our country a "tong" for the family of the bereaved so they can cover the expenses of the family during their hard times.
Do you have a similar practice in your country and is this legal in your country?

I like this tradition because it could at least assist the family in raising small funds that could assist them in covering some expenses. In my country, the wake keep is usually used to share memories about the deceased. It is also a time to sing and dance solemn tones to comfort the family. But the family is also burdened with the responsibility of entertaining the people with food and drinks. But this culture is good because the family will also get some support.

not sure also whether we have a similar culture with other countries regarding this but probably the Latinos or the Hawaiians.

I live in Latin America, and it's not a common practice in the country where I live. Actually, I didn't even know people do this kind of thing, so it sounded really strange and uncommon to me, as something inappropriate for a situation where everyone adopts a formal stance towards each other, where people don't joke around, neither speak too loud, express joy or laugh. Wakes are very introspective occasions, where it seems each person reserves their time to reflect deeply and pay tribute silently to the person who has left us. In our culture, and western cultures in general, I think the least thing someone would think in a moment like that would be to gamble.

Death is a taboo in western cultures: a moment of sadness and despair in many cases, while gambling is related to joyness, excitement, leisure and pleasure. Therefore, people don't mix both.

It depends on the culture and the tradition this is normal for us I have stated in this thread that we do this to sympathize and to be with the family for the whole night, it's not like a fiesta celebration we do the gambling outside of the house while the family and those who want to sympathize are are inside the house, we usually have a tent outside of the house this is where people gamble and talks or just want to be in the premises.
But on the day of the burial, everything is solemn and full of sadness and sympathy for the family.
I guess we all have traditions that are very different from other countries when it comes to gambling and how they do it.

Such cultural events in burials is not targeted at celebrating someone's death, that wil be very unacceptable. But it is a tradition that helps to encourage and make mourners feel less grief. Yes it is meant to be a solemn gathering but it is also a time to meet with relatives and friends and such traditional events makes the place lively. We are mourning doesn't mean that there will be no form of entertainment. In my location burials attract singers and dancers especially if the deceased is old or influential. Like I said before, OP stated that the gambling event I also support the grieving family financially.

[EarnOnVictor]

This is legal in our country provided that you ask permission from authorities, they allow gambling like card games and color games they allocate a fee, or what we call in our country a "tong" for the family of the bereaved so they can cover the expenses of the family during their hard times.
Do you have a similar practice in your country and is this legal in your country?

I often play games during the wake to keep up with friends and relatives of the bereaved this is to sympathize with the family, these are friendly games and the tong will help the family, it's been with this tradition ever since in our country, and I believe it will keep on as long as there are families who need to cover expenses of the family's who are left.

Tong? I'm afraid it's not practised in my country. This is even the first time I am reading a practice like that. I'm curious though, it would be nice if you could add the name of your country to the OP so that we can at least know where such is being practised. Or better still, the continent you are to have a clue if you do not want to add the name of your country. This practice is worth doing, it's a very good means to cater for the bereaved, at least for a while until they find firm feet again. Of course, in my thought, the rich might go against it, but for those who are poor, it will go a long way to help them.

How I wish I could introduce this in my community as well, but the issue is that I live far from my ancestral home, and to do this in an urban area will take a lot of orientation and resources which I do not have. Well, I wish those who are doing it well. Perhaps one day, the NGOs that have the needed resources can spread it across, being a way to help.

Nonetheless, in my country, we do not just leave the bereaved like that, we drop cash envelopes for them depending on the closeness. This, I believe is similar to "tong. " Though playing games could motivate one to play more against an opponent which could be more money for the bereaved.

[electronicash]

This is legal in our country provided that you ask permission from authorities, they allow gambling like card games and color games they allocate a fee, or what we call in our country a "tong" for the family of the bereaved so they can cover the expenses of the family during their hard times.
Do you have a similar practice in your country and is this legal in your country?

I often play games during the wake to keep up with friends and relatives of the bereaved this is to sympathize with the family, these are friendly games and the tong will help the family, it's been with this tradition ever since in our country, and I believe it will keep on as long as there are families who need to cover expenses of the family's who are left.

Tong? I'm afraid it's not practised in my country. This is even the first time I am reading a practice like that. I'm curious though, it would be nice if you could add the name of your country to the OP so that we can at least know where such is being practised. Or better still, the continent you are to have a clue if you do not want to add the name of your country. This practice is worth doing, it's a very good means to cater for the bereaved, at least for a while until they find firm feet again. Of course, in my thought, the rich might go against it, but for those who are poor, it will go a long way to help them.

How I wish I could introduce this in my community as well, but the issue is that I live far from my ancestral home, and to do this in an urban area will take a lot of orientation and resources which I do not have. Well, I wish those who are doing it well. Perhaps one day, the NGOs that have the needed resources can spread it across, being a way to help.

Nonetheless, in my country, we do not just leave the bereaved like that, we drop cash envelopes for them depending on the closeness. This, I believe is similar to "tong. " Though playing games could motivate one to play more against an opponent which could be more money for the bereaved.

Philippines that's where this tradition is very common.  "Tong" if i'm not mistaken is just a slang word for a small fee when a gambler wins the pot. this fee will generate funds for the wake to keep running til the day of burial.  i'm not really aware of the history of the word but its just what's been called since the time i was aware of it.

when my grandpa died, it took a week of wake that his basement was like a betting house. drinks were served including cervesa and coffee and cookies which these are funded by the "tong".

[komisariatku]

No, in my country it is not allowed to play cards for money. In my country, if there is a wedding parties that lasts for 3 days and 3 nights, usually late at night we play cards until morning while guarding the party location. In the past, things like this were often used as gambling practices and at that time the police were not firm and allowed it, but now it is completely prohibited.

Apart from wedding parties, we also often play cards during night patrols carried out by residents of the housing complex in turn, usually we play cards at the patrol post until the morning. However, we are prohibited from using money, but we often use money secretly

[Quidat]

This is legal in our country provided that you ask permission from authorities, they allow gambling like card games and color games they allocate a fee, or what we call in our country a "tong" for the family of the bereaved so they can cover the expenses of the family during their hard times.
Do you have a similar practice in your country and is this legal in your country?

I often play games during the wake to keep up with friends and relatives of the bereaved this is to sympathize with the family, these are friendly games and the tong will help the family, it's been with this tradition ever since in our country, and I believe it will keep on as long as there are families who need to cover expenses of the family's who are left.

Tong? I'm afraid it's not practised in my country. This is even the first time I am reading a practice like that. I'm curious though, it would be nice if you could add the name of your country to the OP so that we can at least know where such is being practised. Or better still, the continent you are to have a clue if you do not want to add the name of your country. This practice is worth doing, it's a very good means to cater for the bereaved, at least for a while until they find firm feet again. Of course, in my thought, the rich might go against it, but for those who are poor, it will go a long way to help them.

How I wish I could introduce this in my community as well, but the issue is that I live far from my ancestral home, and to do this in an urban area will take a lot of orientation and resources which I do not have. Well, I wish those who are doing it well. Perhaps one day, the NGOs that have the needed resources can spread it across, being a way to help.

Nonetheless, in my country, we do not just leave the bereaved like that, we drop cash envelopes for them depending on the closeness. This, I believe is similar to "tong. " Though playing games could motivate one to play more against an opponent which could be more money for the bereaved.

Philippines that's where this tradition is very common.  "Tong" if i'm not mistaken is just a slang word for a small fee when a gambler wins the pot. this fee will generate funds for the wake to keep running til the day of burial.  i'm not really aware of the history of the word but its just what's been called since the time i was aware of it.

when my grandpa died, it took a week of wake that his basement was like a betting house. drinks were served including cervesa and coffee and cookies which these are funded by the "tong".

Each country does have their own traditions but i do see this to be somewhat that common or could be seen on other countries as well not only just on Philippines but having this kind of
set up on where there would really be some sort of fee accumulation or thats been called tong or whatever it its, then it would be somewhat be beneficial into the family that had been affected.
Its not bad on applying out such thing because it is really just that for the c=good cause. Gambling or playing cards into these kind of wakes is really that common.
People would really be needing to be aware of such time and doing some gambling thing would really be that common.

Here in our country then this is something that do happens too but not really that much if we do speak into our own family or relatives on which there's no such thing
about having that pot fee or something. The money that been saved or accumulate do comes from to those relatives who do give out such donation or something
like that.

[Volimack]

There is no such law in our country but playing cards is considered gambling and has strict restrictions. It's fine if someone plays secretly but if they find out, the police will come. Once here in our house some people were playing cards when the police came in civil dress and arrested them. Bereaved families must find other ways to support. In countries where card playing is allowed, it will be easier to help bereaved friends and relatives

[Assface16678]

Well, yeah in my country in some places they doesn't allow street gambling unless you will ask for permission to the local authority, for example  there is an event in in the barangay, or city before you can host an gambling games you should ask for permission because if not then it will be considered as illegal, the country I'm residing in doesn't have strict rules about gambling, you just need to comply and ask for permission in order to maintain order in that place and also if anything happens then there should be a person that is responsible for that, it is also implemented so that to avoid those illegal gambling host that can have bad intent to those customers, in short to avoid scammers that could take advantage to those people who will gamble in their hosted gambling. I agree with authorities implementing rules that should be followed to avoid anomalous transactions.

[Zigabel]

In my country gambling is legal and there's no further restrictions to how it's been carried out, so if you choose a certain pattern with which you could gamble if it causes no harm to anyone or the society at Large then it's definitely not a problem and you bare at liberty to go ahead to gamble the way you whish, in cases or situation as this, you bare at liberty to give to the bereaved family whatever it is you wish to probably from your gambling proceeds in oder to support the family and there's no restrictions or regulations to that.

Card games are not considered illegal in my country but it shouldn't be a reason why there will be any form of breaking the law or causing disorder which also includes when any bereaved family is involved but if it's a way of reconnecting and keeping family and friends together then there's absolutely nothing wrong with it in my country.

[Kakmakr]

I think it's a exellent idea, because there are a lot of countries with very poor people. I see they play "Tong" in the Philippines and it is very popular there.

I did not know that it is played during a "Wake" or "funeral" ... which is good, because it helps the family financially.

Different countries have differents cultures, so the world should accept other people's cultures and respect them.

[livingfree]

Yeah, it is a tradition and it will be more supported if the dead has been engaged in gambling and knows by the community as a gambler. There's a belief that his soul might even be happier if he/she people gambling on their wake.

But for me, I don't do that on anyone's wake. I am there to chit and chat and have sometime with the bereaved family to discuss matters or just wanna catch up. It is just my way of showing respect to the dead person, I am not against gambling on the wake.

If it's allowed, that's allowed and no one can stop that. As I've said, that's just me and my way of paying respect not just to the dead but also to the family.

[OceanBit]

I personally do not join or engage during wakes but we have the common tradition and I think we are in the same country. Fees or tongs is collected from gambling are donated to the bereaved family financially to help cover funeral expenses or support them. Regardless of the legality, it's still important to gamble responsibly, set budget andavoid excessive gambling