Pregnancy before marriage or after marriage, which do you prefer?

[Helena Yu]

It is true that infertility do not only occur in women it also occurs in men too but the high level of casual sex relationship in this generation
Is alarming, You will agree with me that the women I mean the girls are the ones in the receiving end of the story in the situation of getting pregnant and probably refuse to keep the pregnancy by indulging in taken substances that might have a negative effect on them not being able to concieve tomorrow because they don't want to give birth to a child without being properly married, to protect family prestige pride and dignity or religion, this actually act is of the increasing side in most of our societies today which of course is one of the major reason why I brought up this topic of discussion, a lot are really happening behind the scene.

It's their own mistake, why they choose horny rich men over well mannered Average Joe?

If they choose well mannered Average Joe, they won't end up getting pregnant before marriage because Average Joe respect with their spouses. Nowadays they only want money and skip everything because for them money is everything.

Personally I don't see men are wrong in this case, they give something to their women, it's not the women who give the men. Men pays to get the women's body, that's a fair deal, if the women are getting pregnant, that's the risk from this side job.

[Merit.s]

Giving birth before getting married is what the poor people do, because they started the relationship without having the resources to get married. Most young men and women gets married immediately after they have graduated from the university because that's how someone planning to have a responsible family should do. However, the urge of sex can thwart one's efforts from getting married before getting pregnant. I don't think that it's because the man wants to know if his partner can give birth or not that's why he prefers to get her pregnant first before marriage.

In my tradition, it's a taboo for a lady who hasn't married yet to be pregnant and it's against our culture. When such happens, if they families are rich, the parents put their heads to get and plan for their marriage.

[Fiatless]

In my observations in our society today,there is an increasing rate up to ninety percent of men that prefer their woman to be pregnant before marriage, reason been that they feel most women have messed up their wombs out of youthful exuberance and may not be able to concieve again and for this reason most bachelors wouldn't want to stay in a marriage without a child and at such they prefer having a confirmed pregnancy result before proceducing for any marital right, what are your stand on this?

In my culture, if you impregnate a girl without marriage, you will pay double the bride price. What that means is that the bride price of a pregnant woman is higher. Religiously, sex before marriage is a sin called fornication.

If you truly love someone, there is no need to check if she is fertile or not. You can adopt a child if she is having fertility problems. And modern technology has made it more easier for people to have children through diverse means.

[Iranus]

It is true that infertility do not only occur in women it also occurs in men too but the high level of casual sex relationship in this generation
Is alarming, You will agree with me that the women I mean the girls are the ones in the receiving end of the story in the situation of getting pregnant and probably refuse to keep the pregnancy by indulging in taken substances that might have a negative effect on them not being able to concieve tomorrow because they don't want to give birth to a child without being properly married, to protect family prestige pride and dignity or religion, this actually act is of the increasing side in most of our societies today which of course is one of the major reason why I brought up this topic of discussion, a lot are really happening behind the scene.

Not all young girls today are so naive or stupid that they don't know how to protect themselves. They are just like us men, some are stupid and some are smart.

I agree that sex is much more open these days but that doesn't mean girls don't know how to protect themselves. In a developed world, knowledge about sex and life is introduced into education quite early and is not too difficult to access thanks to the development of the Internet. There are many methods of safe sex and I believe that even teenagers today know, let alone young people over 18 years old.

I don't know what's going on in your country, but from what I see around me, the majority of people who are unable to have children are men. The reason is said to be because they drink alcohol, smoke or even abuse drugs...All are leading causes of sexual diseases in men, such as erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation...or worse, infertility while the infertility rate in women is significantly lower.

[Y3shot]

In my observations in our society today,there is an increasing rate up to ninety percent of men that prefer their woman to be pregnant before marriage, reason been that they feel most women have messed up their wombs out of youthful exuberance and may not be able to concieve again and for this reason most bachelors wouldn't want to stay in a marriage without a child and at such they prefer having a confirmed pregnancy result before proceducing for any marital right, what are your stand on this?

A man will always feel this way only when he sees some kind of woman with a lifestyle that matches the type of woman he wants to settle down with. If very responsible women are the kind he prefers to be with, I don't think this thought will be there. Looking at some women with the kind of lifestyle they live, it is possible for one to think this about them. As for me, I know the kind of woman I want, and I don't think I need to impregnate a woman first before we get married. Baddies are the kind of women some men prefer to settle down with in marriage, so I won't blame men who think they need to impregnate their partners first before marriage, maybe because of the lifestyle their partners might have lived in the past.

[SuperBitMan]

Everyone has there own believe when it comes to what you are talking about OP, for me I will like to get married first then before pregnancy, the world is now a place where sex is seen as a normal thing aside marriage which is of the things causing problems in marriages, when two people are dating they enjoy all the things meant for marriage life and getting married now becomes a problem and before you know it the relationship ends.
For me I think marriage is interesting and sex should be done only in marriage.
A lot of single mothers you see today is as a result of this, a man will tell them that before they will get married to them they need to first of all get pregnant and as soon as they are pregnant they will get married and when they end up getting married the men refuse to marry them, so please all the women be guided a man that truly loves you won't ask you to get pregnant before he marry you, any man that tells you that just want you to give birth to his children.
Get married first enjoy your marriage and then give birth and train your children together.

[Dunamisx]

In my observations in our society today,there is an increasing rate up to ninety percent of men that prefer their woman to be pregnant before marriage, reason been that they feel most women have messed up their wombs out of youthful exuberance and may not be able to concieve again and for this reason most bachelors wouldn't want to stay in a marriage without a child and at such they prefer having a confirmed pregnancy result before proceducing for any marital right, what are your stand on this?

In my culture, if you impregnate a girl without marriage, you will pay double the bride price. What that means is that the bride price of a pregnant woman is higher. Religiously, sex before marriage is a sin called fornication.

If you truly love someone, there is no need to check if she is fertile or not. You can adopt a child if she is having fertility problems. And modern technology has made it more easier for people to have children through diverse means.

Was it not before of the affordability of paying the bride price a d other ceremonial obligations that makes some men ran away from going through the normal procedures for getting married and take a shortcut by impregnating the partner, so that things would have been more better for them to pay or completely avoided than the demands their culture can render, but that's  not an excuse anyway from going through the normal procedures and rights.

[OgNasty]

I always thought that pregnancy after marriage was the obvious way to go, but now that I am a man with some assets and things to lose I am not so sure. As a man, I just don’t see much of a benefit from marriage. It’s like signing a contract where you are only able to come out the loser. I think unless legal changes are made with regards to men and women and how they’re treated by courts, marriage will continue to be a losing proposition for men when it comes to children.

[Hispo]

I always thought that pregnancy after marriage was the obvious way to go, but now that I am a man with some assets and things to lose I am not so sure. As a man, I just don’t see much of a benefit from marriage. It’s like signing a contract where you are only able to come out the loser. I think unless legal changes are made with regards to men and women and how they’re treated by courts, marriage will continue to be a losing proposition for men when it comes to children.

Interestingly enough, here in my country things regarding marriage and divorce are quite laxed in comparison to what I have seen going on in countries like the United States and those within the European Union.
Here the assets of the parties are mostly keep untouched after a divorce and for some reason the government do not enforce men to pay to women for the children they had while being a United family.
My theory is that our government is so inefficient and our society so conservative and catholic/evangelic, that we do not buy the whole feminism rethoric and the ideas of women being in social disadvantage when compared to men. This is pretty much a society which favors men, and I have seen it personally, there are engineering companies which do not hire women at all, because the simple fact they are women and because the boss of those companies believe they could give trouble in the working place, so it is well known female engineers here more likely to remain unemployed, unlike make engineers.

Traditionally engineers have been men in the country.

[Zanab247]

In my observations in our society today,there is an increasing rate up to ninety percent of men that prefer their woman to be pregnant before marriage, reason been that they feel most women have messed up their wombs out of youthful exuberance and may not be able to concieve again and for this reason most bachelors wouldn't want to stay in a marriage without a child and at such they prefer having a confirmed pregnancy result before proceducing for any marital right, what are your stand on this?

I disagree with you that men that want their wife to be pregnant before marriage are 90% in the society. We all know there are some medical fitness some people use to carry out to know if the man or woman is alright to give birth before embarking on marriage, and is helping many marriages today not to break up easily after marriage.

I stand for marriage before pregnancy, because I'm a Christian and the holy bible say bed undefined meaning man and woman will not have sex during the courtship or get pregnant before marriage.

[Agbamoni]

I stand for marriage before pregnancy, because I'm a Christian and the holy bible say bed undefined meaning man and woman will not have sex during the courtship or get pregnant before marriage.

Let us keep Christianity aside first. Forcing a child on a woman whom you have not marry her is not an ideal way to start a family. Medically, there are recommend test for people with interest to get marred to check their fertility status before they move on to the next stage of getting married. Sometimes, the fault comes from the man not even the woman, so if she did not get pregnant he might think she is not fertile when he is the one who is impotent. Medical test proves and solve this all.

[AYOBA]

Everyone have different beliefs, and conditions. To me I will prefer the marriage before pregnancy, because pregnancy before marriage is against my belief though it is the same in some other traditions. Should in case you are doubting the lady you want to marry, I will advise you both go for some medical diagnosis, where you can speak to a medical practitioner, and they will direct you on the best diagnosis to perform.

I will say marriage before pregnancy is still very possible, the pregnancy before marriage was common in the ancient area, but not anymore, though some people still insist, with the healthcare system that can be taken care of.

Yes, everyone has their own traditions and beliefs. Although their are some of the traditional gifts that both parents must get know them before they agree to marriage, I don't believe that's still the case today.  Although some people still engage in the behavior, it has decreased: As you mentioned earlier, new medical technology has made it easier by directing us to medical diagnostics to take the test that will show us each person's position and whereabouts. This is because some traditions bring up the idea only to see if she are capable of conception from the person she wants to marry.

[Ndabagi01]

In my observations in our society today,there is an increasing rate up to ninety percent of men that prefer their woman to be pregnant before marriage, reason been that they feel most women have messed up their wombs out of youthful exuberance and may not be able to concieve again and for this reason most bachelors wouldn't want to stay in a marriage without a child and at such they prefer having a confirmed pregnancy result before proceducing for any marital right, what are your stand on this?

This is not a good idea at all and I really don’t like people having such mindset before finally settling down for marriage. It may not look like a bad idea but the repercussions are not what one should want to encounter is things don’t go as planned. It is better you do your own research about the woman you wish to marry to know what kind of life she has lived in the past that may not have affected her genitals for pregnancy. Marriage is not something to rush into, so you have the whole time to do this research and come to a conclusion whether you can spend the rest of your life with such person or not.

[Sjkah]

I prefer not to get pregnant before marriage. If you give birth before marriage, there is a greater chance of problems later. If you get pregnant after marriage, there is no problem.

[Juicyhome]

I always thought that pregnancy after marriage was the obvious way to go, but now that I am a man with some assets and things to lose I am not so sure. As a man, I just don’t see much of a benefit from marriage. It’s like signing a contract where you are only able to come out the loser. I think unless legal changes are made with regards to men and women and how they’re treated by courts, marriage will continue to be a losing proposition for men when it comes to children.

The obvious is that men benefit nothing from marriage, as we grow and learn from what is happening around the world. One must be careful and think well before you marriage, have it at the back of your mind that you are into trouble. And if you can carry the trouble then embrace it. Women now marry for business and to escape poverty nothing else.  Children are not blessing let no motivational speaker deceive you on it, if children  was a blessing poor men in our society with many children won't be poor. Rather children brings more responsibility. If you can handle the responsibilities go ahead and marry.

Have advised my lawyer, to give 50% of my possessions to my brothers 50% to my wife and children, you must have a concrete document with your lawyer before marriage, forget pregnancy before and after marriage. You can  never trust ladies in our generation, and if you want to marry you must be smarter than them.

[Marvell1]

If you truly love someone, there is no need to check if she is fertile or not. You can adopt a child if she is having fertility problems. And modern technology has made it more easier for people to have children through diverse means.

Technology has advanced significantly but that doesn't mean it can solve everything, especially rare diseases and infertility. Infertility treatment is difficult, time consuming and extremely expensive, not every couple can afford to pay those huge bills.

In my opinion, with the increasing rate of infertility and birth defects, it is necessary to check the fertility of the partner before marriage. But this must be done voluntarily by both parties, not under coercion or command. Because like you said, that's not love.


In addition, couples should encourage each other to get medical check-ups as soon as possible because some diseases can be cured if detected early.

[Dunamisx]

It's good to always follow the due procedures before making a decision on giving birth, also, we should not engage on s3x outside marriage because it will lead to unwanted pregnancy and that is why some men after discovering this, decided to avoid the woman with her pregnancy because they are not prepared for it, we shouldn't start what we can't finished.

[BADecker]

There is really no pregnancy before marriage. Pregnancy, itself, is the proof of a marriage having happened, even though it may be the only proof.

[OkoroT]

While the traditional view of marriage before pregnancy is prevalent, I believe that pregnancy can be a valid reason for marriage.
Ultimately, the decision to get married or have children should be based on individual circumstances and what works best for you.

Having children before marriage also represents a potential instance of irresponsibility. Most childbearing occurs without the consent of one or both partners, and therefore the choice to marry often leads to unsuccessful outcomes. Childbearing should be a conscious decision, not a situation imposed by force, simply because it requires a degree of responsibility that both parties must commit to, rather than a unilateral decision.

It is good to follow the due procedure before getting pregnant.
By right pregnancy should not coming before marriage, 1st courtship  the time two partner  has a romantic relationship before they get married.
2nd  marriage:is the state of being married.
It is good for a young lady to get married before marriage , but why some young men like their dat to get pregnant before marriage is because of what is happening in this 21st century some many young girls has no womb that is why some young men like their girl to have pregnant before marriage

[BADecker]

There is really no pregnancy before marriage. Pregnancy, itself, is the proof of a marriage having happened, even though it may be the only proof.

Divorce is what happens when the couple split up... if there isn't any contract or marriage license.