FYI, this topic has been discussed in a few different contexts, such as in
this thread. Obviously, multi-signature transactions are built into the network, so this kind of ECDSA magic is unnecessary, at least for simple 2-of-2 transactions. Also, the 2-of-2 using ECDSA as you described requires one party to compromise their own private key to allow the other party to claim the entire encumbered amount. There's no way to, say, split the money that is locked in the 2-of-2 transaction without one party trusting another. Also, I don't like the idea of having wallets where some private keys are
supposed to be revealed, while it's an epic fail for other keys to be revealed. It works for Casascius physical Bitcoins, but I have personally decided it's not a good idea for general usage.
On top of that, I believe that being able to split the encumbered money is important: I am firm believer that both parties need a "risk deposit." That the initial 2-of-2 fund is seeded with, say, 20% of the transaction value
from both parties (can do more or less depending on how much the parties don't trust each other). At the end of the transaction, if everything went as planned, both parties get their risk deposit back -- Alice puts in 1.2X and Bob puts in 0.2X; at the end of the exchange, they both sign a tx sending 0.2X to Alice, 1.2X to Bob. But if it doesn't go smoothly, then both parties lose their deposit and the tx money. Therefore, there is every incentive for both parties to resolve the transaction agreeably.
This avoids:
(1)
Lazy Alice: Alice receives the goods but then is too lazy to sign the transaction completing the transfer to Bob (or in your case, sending the private key to Bob). She might do this maliciously if she is disatisfied with the product, and if she has no risk deposit, it costs her nothing to screw over Bob.
(2)
Prankster Bob: Bob advertises that he has products to sell with no intention of selling anything. Alice puts 100 BTC into a 2-of-2 tx, and then Bob disappears leaving the money stranded. Or Bob comes back and offers to split the money with her, since she'll get nothing back if she doesn't agree. Etc. With a risk deposit, Bob has to put his own money into the tx to demonstrate that he is serious about the transaction. And using special hash codes, it's possible for both Alice and Bob to inject the money "simultaneously" so that neither party risks putting money in before the other.
(3) The risk deposit could serve as a pre-paid fee for third-party arbitration, if a third-party was included on the transaction. A common agreement might be that third-party Charles, might arbitrate any transaction that has at least 10% risk deposit from both parties. Charles takes that 20% as its fee only if arbitration is needed.
Gavin doesn't like the idea of coins being lost, and thinks there should be a MAD option (mutually assured destruction), to allow the coins to be recycled if things go awry. I'm still not entirely convinced that's necessary, but it's not a bad idea. I guess we never actually resolved "the best way" to do this...