Your question is a little difficult to understand, but I'll take a stand at one part of it.
How would I be able to setup bitcoin.exe to send info to BTCMine in order to join their pool?
As far as I know, you can't. The Bitcoin client won't connect to a pool to get work, it will only process its own work. Also, the Bitcoin client won't use your GPU, only CPU.
If you want to use your GPU, or mine against a pool, you need one of the standalone mining programs like GUI Miner
basically i wish to play everquest 2 and to mine at my own spare time, not using power that isnt needed in the first place.
That question is a bit vague. Do you mean, you only want to mine while playing EverQuest 2? Or mine only when not
playing EverQuest 2? For the latter, I believe there are mining programs and/or scripts that will only activate when your machine is idle, thus allowing you to play video games without having your computer slowed down.