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So here’s something I’ve noticed with my wife.. thing is..  whenever I win in gambling she suddenly becomes really sweet to me. i remember, last time I hit a big parlay in sports, I told her about it and she was super supportive and even telling me to keep doing it since “you’re good at that.”

But when I lose and I tell her, damn hurt my ears it’s the complete opposite -- she starts blaming me for gambling too much, saying I’m wasting money, all the usual complaints

So now I’m wondering… should I just keep it quiet whether I win or lose? Anyone else dealing with something like this? How do you handle telling your partner about your gambling results?  ;D

Just gamble responsibly is what that is very important. If you are using little amount of money to gamble, your wife will not tell you that you are wasting money on gambling while losing.

If you have been telling her about it before, no need to stop as you see her as a friend that you can always talk with. There are something I can hide from my wife but gambling is not one of them.

Being honest with your partner about gambling depends on the level of trust and understanding you both share if your gambling is small harmless and within limits then sharing wins or losses shouldn’t be a problem it even helps create transparency and avoids suspicion because hiding anything money related can quickly turn into conflict later on.

but if gambling tends to cause arguments or stress in your relationship then maybe it’s better to keep it to yourself especially when the amount is small and doesn’t affect the household finances not every detail needs to be shared as long as it doesn’t create problems for both of you. The key is moderation once gambling starts affecting your financial balance or emotional peace that’s when transparency becomes necessary your partner deserves to know if it’s turning into something serious in the end it’s not really about winning or losing it’s about trust responsibility and making sure gambling stays a form of entertainment not a reason for tension at home.

It’s normal for a wife, especially if she’s not a gambler. If you want to keep her happy while you gamble, just don’t tell her about the losses. Keep it to yourself, cry it out if you have to, but no need to bring that stress to her. But if you hit a big win, that’s the part she deserves to know, she’ll love hearing that, especially if you buy her something she likes as a gift.

That’s just part of having a healthy marriage, some things are better kept quiet if you know they won’t make her happy.

Men should not forget their responsibilities as a husband, they should take care of their family and they should make sure they are the breadwinner. This will keep the wife mouth shot as she will respect the husband. Women did not just react to gambling, there are something also going on that the women is using to have arguments with the husband.

I don't. The last time she found that I gambled and lost a large sum of money, she made me promise not to gamble again. I was not going to let her know either but missing a large amount of savings was very visible. It's better to keep my wins a secret not only cause I promised her not to gamble again but also to use that as emergency fund in case I go down the spiral path again. It's not a good idea to talk gambling with wives.
I was one of those husband who shared everything with my wife, all my accounts, salaries and what not but with years passed, I have realized that it would have been better if I kept most of my financial activities opaque, just giving the slight idea of my salary range but nothing else.

That attitude there tells you all you should know. However, in case you didn't get the obvious; let me spell it out – don't tell her whenever you gamble. Whether you win or lose, don't let her know. No one likes to be blamed when they lose money. It destroys the psych. It's bad enough that you lose, then she comes nagging about your loss to make it worse. She's not supportive of your gambling habit. She's only interested in your wins. To avoid friction in the home you've to quit telling her. However, make sure you provide for the family and don't get addicted. That's what should matter.

 Lolz the thing is she is always supportive when you win but when you don't, she doesn't want to hear so why not treat everyday like you lost because the truth is I won't want a partner who's only interested in my winnings and not the loss because the fact is, there's already the pain of losing money when you lost, the last thing you need is someone reminding you of your failure and making a big deal out of it.
Situations like this often tends to push one to keep betting even after a loss so they can at least get a positive comment from the partner.

Since she knows that you gamble, there is no point in hiding it from her; she has to know the good and the ugly as well, because she is your friend and confidant whom you share everything with, so why hide it from her?
I understand that women can be very emotional and reactive sometimes, but sharing every moment with them is worth it, as long as they are very much supportive of you and your aspirations. It would be nice if you were open and transparent to her by letting her know you had won your bet, so she could have that trust in you, because if you don't, and she finds out in the future, she would begin to doubt you, even if you are telling her the truth and she might remind you of this event and how you kept it a secrete away from her. You should tell her and forget about it. After all, she is your wife.

It’s always hard when someone you care about doesn’t really understand the emotional side of gambling losses sometimes they only see the money part and forget that you already feel bad for losing when your partner reacts that way it just adds more pressure and guilt.

In this case it’s better to keep gambling conversations limited unless it directly affects both of you financially if your gambling is within your own budget and not harming household needs then there’s no reason to share every win or loss doing so might only cause unnecessary arguments. On the other hand if you ever feel your gambling is starting to interfere with your relationship or your responsibilities it might be worth stepping back a bit and re-evaluating your limits but for peace of mind it’s okay to keep your results private and just focus on staying disciplined and balanced with how much you play.

The thing is that gender can be so dramatic at times you should know them by now, and truly this attitude is very common among them. wife used to be very sweet when thier partner is wining but they don't always take it likely when there partner is losing but for me I will advice you don't make a big deal out of it no matter how she reacts she's still your wife so you have to keep telling her but don't be naive when she Said that you should keep trying more luck you know woman easily get carried away by little things and I would say that maybe she have no idea how gambling works so this is more reason why you don't need to pay attention to whatever thing she said.

I’m actually honest with my partner about my gambling, and I’ve tried telling her the results, win or lose. But it just doesn’t feel right when I tell her about the losses. When I lose, I’m already sad, then she starts saying things I really don’t want to hear instead of comforting me. So I decided it’s better not to tell her anymore. It just gives me a bit more peace of mind.

You have see her reaction when you win and you have seen her reaction when you lose. You should try seeing her reaction when you don't tell her and decide which one of the "lesser devils" you would settle for. Her reaction may be completing different or the same.
My partner knows the reality about gambling and we accept it. Although, I must confess that they have been my voice of reasoning when I am tempted to veer off-course from our initial plan.

If you have to keep quiet when you loose then you also have to keep it quiet when you win as well, because if you keep on telling her you will she will be expecting more from you even when you loose, but the best thing to do is to be quite let her think you have stopped, normally she has already told you to stop the time you told her you lost money, so you can just be quite about the whole situation, don't risk too much so your losses will not affect you physical appearance.

Why don't you just tell your wife...

When I win you are very sweet to me and supportive.
When I lose you nag and tell me to stop.

Haha don't take your wife's word for it, she's usually like that. Lol

Because I know gambling is bad in the eyes of my wife, I always keep the win/loss in gambling a secret, whatever the result is, it is my responsibility and my wife must not know.
That's what I do to my partner.

I do not inform anyone in my family about my gambling. Not everyone can handle the shock of winning or losing, even if you are not a very experienced gambler. When you inform your family members about this, they will become a hindrance to you and you will not be able to concentrate on gambling. Personally I never inform my wife about my salary because as you increase the family's income the demand will also increase with time. That is why I think that the decision regarding the financial matters of the family should be made solely by the one who earns the income and manages the expenses.

Tell her. Make her happy.

The losing part is what you should not tell. That's what I do. It's to avoid fights, and so no one will be stressed. But whenever you tell your winnings, make it just a part of the money. Keep some for you so that she cannot tell if you lost again because you are using money that came from the winnings.  :D

That's what I do, and we are still peaceful at home. Actually, she is happy whenever I tell her about how much I won, and then I send it directly to her digital cash. If I badly need some money, I will just borrow from her, and she won't even mind.

You know how women are with money, they think that gambling is all about winning. When you win you are such a sweetheart but the moment you start losing they will blame you. This thing is common with women and it's not just you dealing with it. Just ignore her and do your thing especially on the days you lose. You can only tell her on the days you win since she makes you happy on winning days, at least she will treat you well in the other room 😁😁 that's how we do it over here.

Expect that to happen especially if your wife is the one budgeting all finances in your family. Since for sure she will provably get angry especially if you tell it to her that you lose your money.

No wife would provably get happy when you lose on gambling. Also expect that they get happy when you are winning since that sign of relief that you still have money.

But what's really best is to continue to became more transparent to your wife and tell you are still gambling. Don't hide this and this will create lots of trouble in your family. Also gamble only you can afford to lose and if your earning is not enough to cover your basic expenses much better quit and just focus on your family.

I have not been in such situation before but that is what you will still expect when you lose big. Again she will not tell you that you are wasting money if your losses are very small compare to your winning rate. Women are very calculative. She might have judged how many losses and winning the few days and then do the plus and minus in it on how much you have lost or won before she will say that. Therefore, what you will do is reduce how the amount you use to gamble so that if you lose, it won't matter alot to her. You don't expect her to clap for you when you lose money especially when the home need money and you probably use money for the home keep to gamble with promise of winning. No, she won't be happy buddy.

I think you should continue acting like husband do, share bad and good life moments with your wife and accept any response she does. As you are already married, it is too late to try to change her and her attitude. You should accept her as she is. Accept that it is your faith to receive such reaction on your gambling results. On the other hand maybe you notice only her reaction on your loss and wins, but dont notice any other reaction on other things you do. Nevertheless, dont be so focused on gambling, instead focus on family.

Seems you don't know those creatures  ;D

Women are programmed to be love and pampered, no matter how we try to shy away from it they all become lovely but where I see red flag is if the love doesn't comes regularly. I don't see any reason why my woman wouldn't show me love until there is money, that settings is very bad. It's possible that you have shown her this as norm and she has becomes used to it, now she can't do without it again. You have to cut that behavior from her for peace to be.

Furthermore, don't tell your wife your earnings if she is money type, yes all women want money with their men but if a woman loves money so much, that consumes them to the point they don't see common red flags and it's not good in my opinion. If she can't handle your pain, she doesn't need to know you have money but spend on her still, it's no mandatory for your woman to know about your pockets but make sure you do everything possible to make her happy.

Lying isn't the best way, at least when you tell the truth you only have verbal arguments that eventually pass and life goes on, and that way your wife will continue to trust you. But when you lie to her and she finds out, then your relationship is doomed to fail. Whenever you say your money ran out, your wife will think you gambled and lost, and it won't matter if you deny it and beg that you didn't gamble. Your word will mean nothing to your wife. Don't follow the path of lies.

Do you want something "special" from gambling? Let's say you want to control your gambling habits. Then you can exploit your wife's behavior. Let's say she's a North Korean gambling regulator. ;)
Okay, more seriously. Did you actually share any planning with your wife from the start, including the funds you allocated for gambling, and are you sticking to it? If you lied from the start, I mean for example, you sometimes secretly increased your bankroll from other allocations, you should have consistently lied about your gambling results.

If gambling isn’t hurting your finances in any serious way, then I don’t think it should affect the relationship. This kind of lie is more like a white lie anyway, not some big sin. It’s just a way to avoid unnecessary problems, because some people really won’t understand gambling if they’re not gamblers themselves. Same with OP’s wife, happy when he wins, but quick to blame him when he loses. Pretty common reaction from someone who doesn’t get the whole gambling mindset.

If you share every bet with your wife, it will be difficult for you to bet according to your wish because she will want to know the results of every bet. A common feature of people is that they are for you in good times but want to stay away in bad times. When you win, you will be treated well, but when you lose, your various faults will be found out. If you keep the bet secret, you will get the opportunity to gamble relatively freely. That is why I suggest not to tell your gambling with your wife.

I think gambling is for entertainment so it is better not to discuss this with your wife. Other people will not see gambling the same way you do. When you win a lot of money your wife will be very happy and when you lose money your wife will talk a lot they only want profit not loss, gambling is for entertainment not for making money. After spending the day in various activities, I think it's better to spend your free time wisely and not discuss your winnings or losses with your wife while gambling for entertainment. ;D

You should know that women don't like taking risk, but they liker the money that comes in taking the risk, what they frowns at is the loss, so i will advise that you should know how you could present the situation with her each time it occurs the unexpected way, or possibly stop informing her, but i wouldn't like giving what may cause in-transparency in your relationship, once you're responsible enough for her, then forget the rest.

Why share every bet? Doing that is basically teaching your wife how to gamble, and then both of you end up gambling. For me, it’s better if she just knows you gamble but she’s not directly involved. That way, in tough situations, you can still ask her for guidance or even tell her if you feel you’re getting addicted. That actually helps a lot, because the problem with some people is they fall deeper into addiction since they have no one to talk to.

Women are very logical in their behavior and how they reason, because they know that once you win, they will definitely benefits from it, while if it turns a loss game, they will also be affected because you may be unable to deliver up to what you could have given unto her, so they try playing safe on both sides and accept what is more of interest to them, now left to you, that even if you loss, you must have a back up fund to entice her and she don't feel the vacuum for losing from what she may demand, so don't gamble your last card of bets and come home unhappy, instead have some shares left for the family.

Love at first sight that leads into a marriage straight away? I asked this because you are the one who should know your woman very well, asking us this question makes me mad somehow.

You should know your woman well, if she is this type of person that reacts alot to any situation you should stop telling her everything about your gambling results.

My own is this, are you a responsible gambler? If you are then there is not problem, stop revealing things to her and when you win make sure you find a way to show her some love.

It is not a must for her to know that you won money from gambling, I would rather tell her that I quit.

I laughed at your story about your wife, any wife would be thrilled if she found out her husband won big at gambling, of course, since you made a ton of money at the casino. But your only mistake was telling her you lost; naturally, she'd get mad. You know how women's moods can be, if what you say isn't good, they'll really get angry.

But try this: piss off your wife first, then suddenly flash the money you won from gambling. I'm sure her anger at you will vanish in a second or in the blink of an eye, it'll be replaced by pure joy, and she might even hug you, shower you with kisses, and say "I love you honey" hehehe. ;D

If someone doesn't fully understand how betting works or how to win, they may react strongly when they lose. From what I've seen, spouses can also react strongly if they don't understand betting. If you're in a profitable position overall, it makes more sense to tell them. But if your spouse only knows whether that day's bet was won or lost, problems may arise. If you explain the whole picture to them and say how much profit you've made, there won't be any issues.

Considering their attitude towards gaming could help the player abstain from blames like the Op. The essence of opening up or sharing gaming experiences with spouses is to stay in check of any habitual development. Unless you are completely in control of your emotions, which won't be accurate all the time without the need of another body to examine, there would be no issues with keeping gaming activities a secret.

If you tell your wife about your winning, then even if your wife is happy at that time, later when you lose while gambling, you will not be able to hide this matter from your wife. And at that time your wife will blame you a lot, which will make you very upset due to your loss in gambling and the blame you get from your wife. And you will not be able to hide your gambling from your wife after that. So I think that you should not share any matter of gambling with your wife, be it win or loss. Gambling should be used secretly Then you will have a sense of responsibility. But when you gamble openly, you are much more likely to become addicted.

We’re the ones who know our partner’s attitude, so it’s really up to us if we tell them or not. There’s nothing wrong with keeping it to yourself as long as you’re a responsible gambler and your income still covers all the bills. Gambling should just be part of your entertainment, extra money you’re willing to lose. Women spend on clothes, cosmetics, and all that, and for us, gambling is where we spend our money. It’s basically even.

She’s just acting her role as a wife; wives are like that, they are supportive and at the same time your worst critic. Just make sure she receives her allowance for paying bills and all expenses.
As long as you are gambling responsibly and you’re not putting the family’s savings and allowance, everything will be ok, but if you suffer streaks of losses, it’s better to be quiet about it, so it will not start a quarrel between you and your wife. This is precisely what I'm doing.

I would say it depends on how you started the relationship that led her to become your wife. You should have known her by now and know when to divulge an information or keep it to yourself.
Seeing how she could react, could be a mood spoiler so it is adviced to keep your wins or losses a secret let her just ask whenever she remembers and that is if she does remember at all due to her schedule that may be way different from yours.
Women tend to be more emotional and may not handle loss like their male counterparts and that's why it is good to let them not think you gamble so much so that it doesn't come back to bite you in the ass when there's any heated arguments or disagreement.

First you need to make sure that your family knows about your gambling. If your family knows about your gambling, then you can tell your wife about your win or loss because when you lose, she can give you the courage to do better or encourage you. In this case, I always try to keep my gambling secret from my family because my family may not take my gambling well or they may have a bad impression of me. If I ever gamble with my family, then I will definitely tell my wife about my win or loss.

When it comes to control, we’re old enough to gamble (unless we lied about our age), so it’s expected that we can handle ourselves. But that doesn’t mean we’re in control forever. There are times we make mistakes, and the worst is when addiction starts. A wife who actually sees what we’re doing can step in and talk to us, maybe guide us back to the right direction.

But let’s not dive too deep into that, that’s a different topic. We’re talking about winnings here, and in the end it’s our call how we handle it. Every wife has a different personality, and we’re the ones who know them best. So we act in a way that respects them as our better half.

It is is the human nature to be happy and celebrate with us anytime we land a huge win, and to criticize and begin advising us to stay away anytime a loss is encountered. But then many fail to understand that in life profits/ wins does come all the time, there is a season to win and then a season to lose, this same prinçiple applies to gambling. That is why I really don't think it is even advisable to always be informing your family members/ partner/ even friends that you are even gambling in the first place coz without you telling them, they wouldn't be expecting you to tell them whether you profitted or you loss. But in a situation where you have already told them you gamble, then you should always keep them in the shadow of your gambling profit and loss status, to avoid constant questions and worries. Just my opinion though

From what I see, his wife doesn't seem to know much about gambling. She only thinks the profit and ignores the risks, which can easily make someone go bankrupt. If from the beginning he never told her that he gambles and kept it secret, then he could enjoy the winnings on his own. He would just need to give her money without explaining where it came from and with that he could play freely whether he wins or loses would be his own responsibility while still keeping a good relationship with his wife.

It would be better if the wife actually listens when we try to explain gambling, but sometimes as men we don’t really share the struggle. We’re more proud of our wins, and the first person we like to share that with is our wife because she’s the one we care about.

So we don’t need to be fully honest about every detail, we just do what keeps things peaceful and makes them happy. And if they ever find out we lost, we just try to ignore the negative comments. Most of the time they won’t notice anyway unless we start acting like we’re addicted.

Tell her. There’s no reason not to tell her unless you don’t love or trust her. Sharing your win gives positivity to her.

Only secret the losses and share the win since it’s the obvious answer that will benefit you both. That’s what I will do if I’m on that situation.

My husband usually share when he won but I never heard anything when he lost. That setup is effective for us.  ;)

Since she's already aware that you good in winning like you said, make her understand that losing is also part of the game and if she finds it difficult to understand, you should only tell her about winning but when you lose, keep it to yourself. I'm not experienced in this kind of issues because I'm not yet married but the suggestions I'm giving you is based on how women react to things, they are happy when you are winning but sad when you lose, they can even blame you for losing,  ;D.

For me  I don't think it's necessary to even start telling my wife of bets because sometimes woman don't take things the way men do so if you want to be transparent with her she may take it the other way round and might not see things the same way with you so it's better to keep it cool . When you win try not to be too excited for her to noticed and when you loose too try not to be temperamental, ensure to keep everything cool while you go about your daily task if you really want to keep it cool for me that's what works for it might work for you it might not as well. Although it took me quite a while to be able to control myself especially when it is that I loosed a bet I kept on battling with it till I was able to balance myself.

Well, you are facing a delicate situation, since your wife is only satisfied when you are successful on your gambling endeavours. She wants the bonus, but not the burden which is also present on the equation, while in theory, the couple should be together and united on the good, but also on the harsh times... Since for real things don't work like in theory, why should you tell your wife about gambling winnings, then?

And what does it become when you lose? :)

Ah, here they are, these manifestations of metamorphoses. :)

It's obvious, Watson. Tell your wife about your winnings, but keep quiet about your losses. :) You can even lie about your winnings in some cases to gain her favor. :)

As you've already experienced, a negative gambling outcome when you tell your spouse about it creates additional negative "noise" on her part. Why do you need this? To experience psychological abuse from her? And if you share a positive gambling outcome with your wife, she'll inevitably pressure you into making some stupid, useless purchase (but so necessary for her). So, no matter the outcome, you either lose your mental health or your winnings. :) Therefore, gamble quietly, without strangers. :)

We've known women to always want the winning side, when it gets tough another time they nag  :)

If the amounts you spend gambling isn't a problem to you both, it can be brought to discussion, might help stop the nagging aspect.

Uncomfortable with the drama then just keep to yourself whatever turns out, you can bring discussions about few of your wins but that of losses say nothing.

In other to have peace, lets try to understand the kind of partners we have, because this goes towards being able to know their kind of temperament and adaptive nature, because some can react weirdly sometimes, while when they discover how we are losing more consistent, they may try top use that as against us for insult, which we may not like or be able to take, its more better to understand them and know if its necessary to keep them off the way we gamble or let them be aware.

At home, honesty is the best policy; however, when you win or lose, your wife acts, she has the right to know that you are the one managing the budget, buying stuff, and budgeting the family's needs.
He is just too concerned about your losses and motivates you to win. Just keep showing him that you're a responsible gambler and you are good to go.

This kind of behavior from your wife is unacceptable, especially when you win at gambling, your wife will love you more, and when you lose at gambling, your wife will be annoyed with you. A truly good wife would never do that, especially a good wife would understand the profit or loss in gambling and that it is an uncertain thing. But if your wife is happy when you make a profit and upset with you when you lose, then your wife must be very greedy. It is better not to share your gambling with your wife like your your greedy wife.

You know your wife better than anyone so that decision should only be based on your judgment, if you think that it's okay if she knows about then by all means you can let her know she is your wife after all. Some people don't tell their spouse about their wins because when they do they start overdemanding and to me that's a good reason to keep it to yourself. Like I said no one can advise you on this the choice is yours

Oh, honestly, I'm a bit confused about how to handle this situation, but it seems much better if you don't tell your wife about any of your gambling results, especially when you lose. Let it all flow until your wife forgets you gamble.

But ultimately, it's up to you, because you're the one experiencing it. Make a decision that feels comfortable for you and won't cause conflict with your partner. And one thing you must remember and maintain is to gamble within your means, and don't let gambling cause financial problems for your family.

You have your own life as your wife has her own life to live. Do not get me writn, but not everything you will be telling your wife. There are something you just think of not telling her and so is she as well. If you do not want to let your wife know about you gambling, there is nothing has there but that will be very difficult for someone like me. I still think anyone that gamble with discipline will not hide something like that from his wife.

I think it's better to keep it quiet and use the money to get a chick for one night stand.

It's a no no for me when a wife act happy when she get money, men aren't ATMs. The same thing how women don't like men to see them as sex doll, gender equality matters. We have to find someone who can be happy when we're at top and support when we're at bottom.

Prostitute chicks are good because they can appreciate what the men gives to them and they won't angry if you lose.

No wife will be happy to know that you lose money from gambling, so to avoid a heated argument, just don't tell them your losses, but occasionally you can tell your wife about your wins.
Just make sure that you don't lose all your salary to gambling; the family budget is important. The worst thing is losing it to gambling, which can start a war between you and your wife.

Women are naturally that way. Your wife is a good woman who always wants you to win. Don't stop telling her because she now serves as your watchdog. She would help you limit gambling if you are doing it so much.

Marriage needs to be transparent. There is no need to hide anything because it will lead to mistrust if she finds out for herself. Don't take the nagging serious, just smile and assure her that you gamble responsible. 

Well I personally think that gambling should not be talked about to everyone, because people smile when they win, and hear the opposite when they lose, just as life has its ups and downs gambling also has its time. So it is better to keep many things to yourself for your peace of mind and if you tell those who have already been told, they will not worry unnecessarily if you occasionally inform them, All in all it is a very personal matter it is right to tell only those who you think will understand. Especially if you have a good gambling friend then he can be a best option to share.

LOL, I never expected to see a thread like this. ;D

Of course she is sweet to you. She expects her share of the win in the form of a present. If you don't tell her that you are still gambling and she finds out, she will be even more mad. So better keep doing it. But you can decrease the number of reports. Especially the ones when you lose. Don't throw them out altogether because she won't believe that you are only winning. 

Telling her isn't a problem when you're sure you got a supportive and understanding wife and also it depends if she's not the money friendly type that's just after money and not concerned about your habits as a gambler, then you're free to share with her your wins alongside your losses so she can give her advice the way she ought to.
But from your narratives it shows that she's only excited about the wins and don't give her support when you lose, nevertheless she's to understand that gambling isn't a bed of roses and you must experience both sides of it. So it's best to be kept silent either you win or lose

She knows what gambling is about, I'm just thinking it's a woman thing to over react as showing that she care. Only the husband can tell us because my woman character can't be the same with your woman character, women behave differently. However, it's better we understand some clarification, hope this isn't a case of when I have money we are all happy and when I have nothing we becomes a stranger, some women are unpredictable but like I says we have to hear from OP himself.

It could also be as a result of mood swing, women exhibit this character. It possible that when the husband told him about the losses, she wasn't in the mood that's why she reacted that way but she can't react negatively when she hewrd about making money from gambling because you know money they say, it brings happiness when you're sad. :P

Wether you lose or win, I would advice that you gamble responsibly know when to stop and when to continue. The female gender is quite complicated and as such, you should probably keep to yourself since you have noticed the behavioural changes that occur. Truth be told, you behave almost the same.. when you win, you are proud of yourself and you celebrate but when you lose, you become sad and has negative emotions, most time blaming yourself or the company... She is basically just reacting as you would but in a different way.

When we share our losses sometimes instead of comfort we end up getting a lecture & when you’re already feeling down it hits twice as hard but completely hiding things especially money related stuff can create bigger problems later maybe what you need isn’t to hide your results but to have a calm conversation with her outside of the gambling situation. Let her know that when you open up about losses you’re not looking for blame you just want support or at least a neutral reaction sometimes people don’t realise how their words affect us, if she still reacts the same even after you’ve explained that then maybe it’s okay to limit what you shar but not to the point where you’re keeping secrets, just set some boundaries. Gambling should be something you do responsibly & it shouldn’t add extra stress to your relationship, just my two cents.

I think your situation is quite easy to manage. Just tell her that you won even when you lost. That way she will always be sweet to you. You can randomly pop some small losses to make it look natural to her because otherwise she might get suspicious of your actions. “Is this guy lying to me to make me feel good?” Play this like a true strategist and a gambler and throw some random small losses between your wins and that way you both can live happily forever. Is it ethical? Fuck no. Is it manipulation? Hell yes. But we all tell white lies to our loved ones don’t we? In my view this has the potential to become a white lies as well. That’s as long as you don’t bet on your life savings if course. You deserve what’s coming to you if you do that and no amount of manipulation and lying can save your marriage then.

I once won $1,150 on a parlay bet and didn't tell my wife it was from gambling, because my wife is very religious, and if she knew, she definitely wouldn't accept it and even forbade me from gambling. I told my wife it was a gift from my side job because she knew I had a side job on this forum, and she was very happy and liked to share. So, most of the money was distributed to our brothers and sisters, including my mother because my father had passed away. My wife is also an orphan. She also donated a small amount to the mosque and those in need. And with an event like that, I was very happy and proud, but is it wrong to lie? But I didn't care, and I had to keep it a secret, including my gambling activity, for other reasons. I'm also not an active gambler; I thought I could stop if I wanted to.

I'll give you one psychology hack. When next you lose, don't tell her and if she notices and asks about your losses, make it clear to her that due to her usual condemnation during your losses, you've decided to keep it to yourself and only tell her when you win since it's what she loves to hear. Women would often promise to be less critic in that situation. Then if she repeats the behavior again, you simply rinse and repeat the trick above or warn her that she'll make you go back to not telling her when you lose.

It's better to say it if your family doesn't really condemn gambling, but if they hate gambling it's better for you to keep it a secret, winning and losing is always a problem when your family doesn't support it, I saw this in my brother's family, even though he won he was treated badly, because gambling was not of their morals which could be tolerated in that family.

So pay attention first to how your family responds to gambling.

It's true that we must gamble responsibly to avoid financial problems, and knowing when to stop and continue is certainly not easy for most gamblers, especially those who are very greedy in gambling and only realize it after losing what they previously earned.
We've all experienced something like what you mentioned: feeling great when we win a bet and getting emotional when we lose. But when we win, there's nothing wrong with sharing it with those closest to us, especially if that person is our own woman, and we certainly shouldn't hide it.

Your wife is your closest partner and it does not really make sense to hide things like this from her. All of her reactions are for your own good. It is best for you to have someone who will advise you when you are getting it wrong, rather than having no one to caution you for your wrong doing.Some people become gambling addiction because they don't have who to caution them if they had someone to caution them when they started getting it wrong, many of them would not have become addicted and regretted it now.Your wife reaction may be advice to you but you are not understanding her now and that is why you are thinking of hiding your gambling activities from her.That is also why you are seeking for advice.It may even be that your wife reaction whenever you lose is what help you for gamble more responsibly.

Do you have to blame her for the irrational behavior? I hope not because such is the psychological reactions of us too who plays the games.

Of course you can not tell me that you don't in anyhow react your emotions with the outcomes of your gambling even though you would be take things under control of yourself.
Profits is always accompanied with happiness while looses goes with sadness.

So your wife is just someone who has not really understand the fact about gambling so that she does not have to feel bad whenever you looses than only praise you when you wins.

Stop sharing everything bro for your own good. :D

Jokes aside, it's good to be transparent with your partner but if she is being supportive of you only when you are winning then I guess it is a red flag, so be diplomatic and keep things on the surface level. I don't know how long you have been married but if it's just recent then give her some time to adjust to your personality.

Of course, when we win a big amount of money, we are very happy but when we lose, we do not support it, we call it a mistake, this is our nature. Your wife or people close to you will only be with you to share the profit but will never be there to take the loss. So I think there is no need to share the good times with those who are not available in times of danger. After losing or winning while gambling, I think it is better not to discussion or share with them, no matter how close they are.

This is very good in one way and very bad in another. For example, if we talk about the bad side, then we can understand that whenever you win a lot of money, he will encourage you to play more and you can start playing more and more and after a while you can become addicted. Because when the person closest to you encourages this side of you, you will not be in a position to consider what is bad and what is good.

The good side is, if your wife hears about your gambling or you yourself say it, then if your wife disciplines you a lot for gambling or does not make you gamble, then this is a very good side. Because she is doing this because she wants the best for you and your family. If you are addicted or gamble less and less, then you can slowly get out of gambling due to your wife's discipline.

Actually you will never find somethin like  one-size-fits-all . Keeping your winnings secret can create a sense of security but it can also create distance &  increase mistrust in the relationship. On the other hand, sharing everything with everyone can increase stress, especially if others become excited about your success.

If you wanna practice responsible wagering then it is foremost to set boundaries with your partner about betting &  money. If you plump up to speak, take in a soft moment &  say something like (I feel...)  as you talk about your successes &  failure. And if you think situation seems too toxic then it is best to take a break for a while

Women are complicated, they never know what they want lol.

And yes when you win, even people that discourage you will want you to continue and see if lightning ⚡ strikes at the same spot twice  ;D but when things go south nobody wants to associate themselves with a loser that is why they say things like you wasting money and all that, but you what as long as you have funds to buy food, pay utility bills, buy gas and all necessities then you can try your luck with the extra funds left  :P

Don't tell your wife I wrote this lol

If your wife is aware that you gamble, that is a good step to take to avoid issues with the family but you must ensure is not affecting you in meeting your obligations as the husband and man of the family. If this has been taken care of and you are meeting up your obligations, I don't thing telling your wife about your win or loss is necessary else you will either turn her into a gambler if your winning is far more than your losses or make her start seeing you as an irresponsible husband when your losses becomes more than your winning.

If you share your winnings with your wife, it can give you a lot more joy. Because you can discuss it with her and tell the story of how you won. Because telling the story of winnings to friends or telling someone in public can bring harm to you, but if you tell your wife, it will not bring any problem to you, rather you can enjoy a joy in the middle of the family. But the question is whether your wife will be gambling friendly or not. If not, then telling your wife can bring more family unrest than joy for you. Considering this, it would be better for you to remain silent.

I have never been in this type of situation before, but one thing I know for sure is that the stance of sport in my relationship is definitely going to decide whether I’ll tell her about my gambling wins or losses. Let’s say she knows that I’m a die hard fan of sports then it wouldn’t be shocking for her to know that I’m into gambling, after all so many people believe that once you’re into sports then there a higher chance of you being a gambler so I think I should be able to break news related to my gambling activities to her but in situation where my sport involvement dwindle down and i am not as acitve as I was when I was younger then there is a higher chance possibility of me not telling her about my gambling activities.

If she isn’t too much interested in all my means of getting money then it wouldn’t be a big deal keeping my winnings from her but if she’s curious and wants to know how I make every money or let’s say we have some kinda of a joint account maybe then k can let her in on my gambling winnings despite not being active in sports as I used to.

In a healthy marriage context,partners ideally needs to support each other regardless of outcomes.Supports mentally, emotionally and even financially.To an extent,if he feels judged, unhappy and uncomfortable with her reactions,then communication needs to be unpacked.That’s a relational concern,ignoring it isn't good meanwhile she needs to be aware of the impact her attitudes creates on him externally and internally.Mindfully,the situation deserves communication.

You are dealing with a woman, you should know already that they are full of emotions, what you experienced is nothing new to me because I have seen it all, when things are going fine a woman could say that her prayers got you there.

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If things turned around they will put the blame on you, women are wired to behave this way, you need strong evidence to make them realize that the fault is theirs.

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Since she already know you to be a gambler there is no turning back now, it is pointless to hide it from her, if she is caring and loving then keep telling her when you win and keep the loss part away, this is women for you, accept it.

Sometimes it's good to tell her because she deserves to know about your winnings, but she don't need to know about your losses just as you may know that nobody celebrates a loss. However, we ladies always get supportive whenever money is involved and you need to know that that's how women are made. Not that there won't be a support from women when you need it, but most of the times we prefer winning than loses even outside gambling. Somtimes it is not good to tell your partner about your failure because not everyone is built to overcome such.

Women are just emotional creatures and inasmuch as gambling is concerned, what they only want to hear is about the winnings not the losses so i will advise you to only tell her when you win but if you lose don't let her know since she always expresses emotions and sadness. If you are meeting up with family demands and your gambling lifestyle is not causing problems in your home then you are good to go. It could have only became a problem if you gamble and don't take care of your family. Many women have the mentality of always wanting to hear the good side and not the bad side and this applies also your earnings, when it declines they tend to show unhappiness but when your earnings increases they become so happy.

It all depends how it's going there at your end there because to someone people that attitude of your wife can be paranoid and unbearable.
Do you know that your unlucky times in gambling can be nurtured to ruin your experience by mostly when you share your experience with the wrong people? If your wife's attributes doesn't give you peace whenever she's you shares your experience with her, then stop telling her afterall you're gambling for yourself or her.
But if you're comfortable with her slams over your losses, then keep it up.
Always up to you.

I will always tell my wife when I want to place a bet, because this keeps me safe from wild gambling, I will ask my wife for capital to bet, my wife will know when I lose & win, openness makes the family more harmonious, win and lose enjoy it together, my wife becomes a hero & helper so that I don't expect too much from gambling

First thing first you mustn't gamble irresponsibly,then again you must gamble on the amount you can afford to lose.Most couples don't hide things from each other no matter how negative the information may be,just like my parents they literally tell themselves everything that has happened to them both in the past and present.If you've built your relationship in such a way that you reveal your gambling wins and losses to your partner then I wouldn't advise you to hide anything from her,if she wants to get angry then you're in the right position to enlighten her that gambling isn't a way for making money always,if she's the type that don't nag then everything will be alright.

keep you gambling results to yourself as much as you can because for a none gambler, is hard to understand the risks that is involved in gambling and their only interest is the result.

When you win the think you good in it, and when you lose they also blame you for that, so what the need to tell who doesn't understand anything, just Make sure to gamble responsibly to stay above every possible addictions.

Most people that hide their gambling wins from their spouse is probably due to the fact that they are chronic gamblers, they don't like the idea of letting anyone that's close to them know that they are on because they know how their loved ones might react to this. But if you are sure that you are gambling responsibly then you shouldn’t be worried about telling your wife about your win, it's a good news

It's no surprise there. Like any average individual who doesn't gamble, it's a waste of money with a little touch of irresponsibility when you lose out on your bets whenever gambling while on the other hand, when you play and win some good money on your bets, it's all smiles and praises along with more encouragement to continue doing what you do. It's only natural and if we're being honest, expected from people in the society.
When you win big and achieve success with gambling, people would convieniently forget how they've always thought about individuals who gamble to be financially irresponsible.

Regarding the question put forward by the OP, knowing the reaction you get from your partner whenever you lose out on your bets, won't it be better you keep your losses to yourself.

It's their nature, they will go to the extreme, whatever the situation is. She starts acting sweet because she sees the money that can fulfill many things and then starts to hate you because the money you should spend on her and the home is lost. This will give you an extreme headache and make you vulnerable to depression. So my suggestion is that you should keep your things to yourself, fix some amount for her and the home, and give it to her at the start of the month. She will no longer interfere in your gambling activities.

It's true to share with those closest to you.. but like life, when you notice someone is always around you when you have money and leave when the money gets finished only to come back again when you receive more money, you should be very wary of that person because they are only interested in your money and not in the mutual relationship you think you both have... So if your wife behaves like that, I think you should limit the information about your wins and losses that you tell her

Even if you decided not to tell her she will still ask you if you are still winning and if you lie to her that you have not win she is going to make you  stop gambling because she will be thinking is losses that you have been running in gambling, maybe you can only informed her whenever there is win and keep all the losing to yourself. However she only get hurts when you told her of losing because she might think that if you no how to gamble you wouldn't have to lose so even if you explain to her about how you can win and also not win she will still get unhappy whenever there is a gambling lost.

What are you a fucking idiot?

Never discuss your losses with your wife.

OP, what you have to understand about women is that they like seeing their men winning, not losing, in whatever they are doing; that alone makes them happy.

If you as their man are losing, it makes them feel hurt, that could make them tell you things you may not like to hear, so that you will sit up to start winning. Gambling is not that way though, to win often without losing.

What you will do in your wife's situation, avoid telling your wife about your gambling wins and losses. Let whatever attitude she will display to you let it not be because of your gambling wins or losses

Sure, it's very important to tell our partners about our gambling habit, I'm still wondering how one can possibly hide his gambling habit from someone you're sharing the same roof with, or maybe you will be doing that when you're away like going to your friends house to do it there so as to prevent your wife from seeing you and I'm still wondering how long one would continue doing this. And this is more like keeping secret from her which is not advisable, for me I don't have any problem in telling my partner about my gambling lifestyle because they might also be thier to help when things go wrong.

Relationship is something we just be careful of in giving advice, because we can't afford to be one sided without being considerate, so that any advise we give the man will not be the one that will ruined his marriage or cause more uproar of misunderstanding than ever before, trust in marriage plays a lot of roles and they both only have to agreed on what will work for them both, advising him not to inform his wife of what's going on could be the begining of losing trust on each other, the man should decide what's best for his marriage.

It is up to you, D.  If you want to keep secret from your wife, it is your call.  The best thing, probably, is just to tell her your success story and keep the unsuccessful gambling story away from her ears.  This way, you can only get sweetness, not the bitterness and headache of your wife nagging, lol.

But seriously, just tell her your winnings.  We all know that things unknown to a person do not hurt him/her or get him/her angry.

She is your wife, so it’s normal for her to know what you’re dealing with. But why would you tell your wife about your losses if you know she would only blame you? Lol. Just forget about it. Just give her extra money or treat her without telling her that you won, and just say you simply want to treat her. As long as it doesn’t affect your financial situation, it’s better for her not to know about your gambling activity.

If I am to be light on her and be dishonest, she just hate losing and like to win, but  to be honest she is not doing you any good, if he doesn’t like you gambling win or lose she should tell you and not encourage you when you win and blame you for losing.
Don’t tell her if you win or you don’t. Don’t hide and lie to her that you don’t gamble, let her know but not the outcome of any sport betting you made.

Whenever you lose do you tell your wife? Seriously it’s really your choice either to tell your Wife whenever you win, or whenever you lose. Am a gambler and I don’t really tell my partner much about my gambling activities. She knows I do gamble, but whenever I win or lose I don’t really tell her, she doesn’t know the amount which I do spend on gambling.

It’s your choice if you know your gambling activities won’t cause any problem with your wife, then it’s fine. Your wife do tell you to keep on gambling, you have to be careful, don’t be carried away because we already know it’s so easy to get addicted to gambling. And women are just always after win, if you start losing and she knows, she’s going to start complaining.

I don't really need much of a partners opinion on my gambling activities. Weather I win or lose the risk is mine to bear. Though there's nothing wrong in telling them about your experiences, but the fact that they might influence you with their emotions is something I don't think I would want to be doing. We already know the kind of risk that's involved in gambling so if I loss I don't bother telling someone about it. They will only see my wins in action because I would have enough to spend on things that I sometimes I'm not interested in buying with my earned money. So it's not really necessary but if you wish then it's okay..

Does your wife know you are a gambler? If not do you think it might end up affecting your relationship if she finds out that you are a gambler after you guys got married? These are questions you should ask yourself but if you feel like none of that is actually going tommatter then you can tell her, but also make sure you tell her about your losses as well that should not be a secret too

This is just a typical behavior in women and I find it quite adorable and it's just them looking out for their husband and preventing them from wasting money unnecessarily because they feel that every lose is wasting money. From your statement it shows that your wife already knows that you are a gambler so there's no way you can hide from her and if her complaint is not toxic then I think you shouldn't hide your winnings or your losses from her but just remember to always gamble responsibility and if you want to keep gambling regardless of any loss just stand your ground and take responsibility for any loss and make sure it doesn't affect your family's affairs in regard to feeding and every other thing in general.

Personally, i never tell my wife when i experience defeat or victory. It's not that i don't want to, it's just better to keep it a secret so that everything continues to run smoothly. What i mean is, when luck comes your way in other words, when you achieve a win you might be eager to share the good news with your wife. But without realizing it, from that moment on, your wife will start hoping you’ll win again soon. This is what should be avoided, because hope can lead to disappointment. I think it's better to buy something she wants beforehand and give it to her as a gift from the winnings. And when you lose, your wife won't scold you for it, as long as you use money you can afford to lose, not money for living expenses, then it won't be a problem.

I'll say just keep it to yourself or be prepared to hear from your wife. Usually wives are much sensitive when it comes to money part and they will easily loose their cool if they find our you are spending a lot of time in gambling and losing a decent amount sometimes. She will pressurize you and every now and then she will keep poking around. I am sure you do not want this because this will start irritating you sooner or later so why not just keep it to yourself.

Even after winning try not to tell her because she will be under the impression that you are still continuing to gamble. This will even ruin your happiness behind the win. So I'll say after you win, go to a nice bar, have a chill beer and come back home as if nothing really happened.

I don't have good news for you, your wife is not that good of a person she is mostly average if she responds like this. Probably in the first case she is hoping that you buy her something nice, she has a materialist outlook but these days most people are like this. To avoid trouble it is best to not share losses or wins with her and continue to have fun as you play. Just make sure that it is always under control and under a strict budget management. If it starts going out of control and you're hiding it from your spouse then that makes things worse and strengthens the addiction and problem.

As long as you don't complain later when you find out that your wife has been keeping all kinds of things as secret from you then it is fine. If you will complain then you are being unfair and should not do this.

The real question is whether it is good news at all? This is actually one of the reasons why people don't like to keep detailed track of their gambling history. It is not laziness or any other excuse that they put instead, it is to hide the real reality of the situation. This means that even if you won something now you could be down hard overall and therefore are in losses. What is there to celebrate? Winning $100 when you are down $10k? That is not a thing to celebrate.  :D

Women can really be funny, especially on matters relating to money. I am glad your wife already knows that you are a gambler and you tell her everything about your gambling activities. Yes, I agree that you let your spouse know about your gambling activities so when you find yourself in a mess, they'll know how to help you.

However, my concern here lies in the possibility of here influencing you into gambling impulsively so you'll make money and make her proud. That is a trap, never let anyone push you into reckless gambling.  Gamble responsibly and without any influence from your wife.

I believe you are a man and you know what is good for you, so you can make your own decisions. If your wife blames you when you lose at gambling, then it is better for you to stop gambling because, in life, sometimes we face ups and downs, and if anything happens tomorrow, you will be blamed for using your money on gambling.

When it comes to marriage, one needs to be very careful, especially when your partner doesn't understand that gambling is about losing and winning. It doesn't make sense for one to celebrate your wins, and when you lose, to be blamed for it.

You don't need to hide the fact that you gamble. What you can do is not tell her when you win or when you lose. If everything is financially stable at home, there's no problem with that. As your husband, you should avoid at all costs putting your partner in a situation of unnecessary stress that she can't understand or resolve. As you've already noticed, she reacts to your victories with pleasure and to your defeats negatively; she's not acting from your logic but from her own emotions.

There's nothing wrong in telling your wife about your win unless you don't gamble responsibly. From what i have witnessed with this a lot of times people that don't tell others that are close to them about their wins are scared that they mind demand too much from them. Keeping it quiet might not really be a ggod idea because she is your wife and she deserves to know about things like this, gambling in secret isn't ideal

I don't think it is necessary to share that with your wife, whether you win or you lose, your gambling games are not something you share with your spouse until it warrants. Until it warrants in the sense that you may want to share your gambling lifestyle with your wife so she can help me in the healing process especially in the case of an addict.

When you are deeply addicted to gambling and you are looking for a rescue, you should not hesitate to share it with your wife so she can help you stop, else you don't have the share your wins or your losts with her. When you win, you are expected to bring the money home for the family's benefit and when you lose you are supposed to man up and hold the lost to your heart and not with your wife.

It’s funny how you become her “champion” when you win and her “problem” when you lose. I’ve witness similar scenario between this very good uncle of mine and his wife. I understand how challenging it could be.

But as a husband, honesty still matters. Instead of hiding results, explain the risks, set limits, and make sure gambling never affects the household. A non-gambler reacts out of fear, not malice.

Ask her what she wants, if it's for you to stop gambling, reduce the rate at which you gamble or the risk, then do so if you truly love her and cherish the relationship.

My wife knows about my gambling and I participate in gambling in consultation with her, but I told her that I am gambling only for entertainment, but the winnings I get from here are not for earning income. She also never told me anything about this matter of mine and did not pressure me for any reason. Moreover, I use a very small amount of money in gambling and participate in sports betting, due to which I did not have a business of earning money from gambling and my wife also did not pressure me to earn money from this gambling platform.

However, one thing is that every gambler, especially those who are married, should consult their wives before doing anything because if any work is done in consultation with their wives, there will definitely be no problem later and even if there is a problem, it can help a lot mentally and physically and the wrong path will be reduced to a great extent.

You must understand the meaning of what your wife is saying here :D
Actually in this case I think it doesn't really matter if you have decided to be open with your partner then when it needs to be told then it must be done but in this case I am talking to fellow men because sometimes not everything we have to tell our wives :)

If indeed they want to ask for their rights as wives and we want to make our wives happy then actually it is also not a problem but we don't have to give everything because of course we also have the right to enjoy it.
But on the other hand what you do is very good in relationships because it is indeed this kind of openness that makes the situation peaceful even though we know that sometimes there are some couples who forbid gambling because of the stigma but when everything feels comfortable and without any interference then it is very good to stay open with your partner.

Just do what is right. Tell her still about your wins and losses, that's how a responsible partner should be. And just an advice, just gamble on what you can afford to lose, not on taking leverage because you expect that the outcome will always favor your bets.

Wives are like that, their mood swings based on what they see around, on what they discover and experience everyday. You're not alone with your situation. The important thing is, you chose to do what is right than keeping secrets that could later on ruin your marriage.

Normally what women need is a good news they don't welcome bad news all the ways, when a good news come into a man's life a woman will claim that is one that is behind the success of Man by giving the man advice that lead him to be success, so we need to understand that in life there are some certain thing that we are not supposed to be telling our wife because it will blame you so much and regret for telling her are they also participating on such thing that makes her to blame you, so the best thing to do is that let your wife know that you are into gambling and do not be telling her that you win in the gambling or you lose in the gambling it is a simple truth

Since you know her reactions whenever you win and loss in gambling, you gotta keep it quiet all the time whether you win or loss, let her detect from your mood if you win through gambling or not because they are really good at that. 

Their emotional mood swings will cause damages when you open up to her about your loss, they never love to hear about that, it's best you keep it quiet.

@OP you must get to use on your wife's behavior.  After all, she is the person who will be with you for a lifetime.  There is no point in hiding your gambling activity since she already knew that you are engaging in gambling.

There is only two solutions, it is either you will be honest with her or leave her blank in some situation.  If you prefer the 100% caring, sweetness, you should only report to her the winnings and not the lossing part.   Yes, you can keep quiet about your losses, to avoid the nagging part since being quiet about something does not mean you are lying to her.  Just do not deny and answer honestly if she asks about the losing part.  But I bet she won't ask for it if you are presenting her with your winnings and your financial support is not lacking.

It's a general/global perspective to every wife and they are good at it lmao.
If i were you, you'd better only tell your wife the wins you made so she's always in good mood and sweet. For everybody peace of mind on your house, don't you ever tell her your losses. lmao

If I'm to be in your shoe's, I will not let her know when I lose in gamble. I will only tell her when I win do we can always be happy. I love my peace of mind, when I win big I can share because of how excited I will be but when the money is too small I rather keep it to myself. Trust me, everyone will always be happy for a successful bet, no one will be excited when they or someone they lose lose their money on bet (including you). And you know women have some characters men find really hard to understand.

Perhaps, it would be better if you avoided talking about your gambling wins and losses with her, in my opinion. You could continue to treat her with some gifts and dinners out your home when you manage to hitman good result on your betting sessions, but it is not necessary you mention where the money comes from. When comes to losses... I would not even bother to give her information about them and just move on, or talk about those losses with someone who is a gambler as well, someone who could understand you.

Man, if your wife supports you when you make money but crucifies you when you lose, that’s a bad sign. It’s always good to keep your eyes wide open in a relationship, because if she truly loves you, she’ll support you during the bad moments too. Just imagine (and I hope this never happens to you) that you get sick or need her for something more serious… will she really be by your side? Well, if I were you, I’d be very cautious about this relationship.

Is this your thread really necessary? You already have answer to your question so why create the thread again? You said your wife is not always happy whenever you tell her you lose, so even when you win why do you have to tell her? Either I win or lose, I won’t tell her since I know how she does react if I lose when gambling. If am in your shoe I will never discus my gambling activities with her again, I will make her feel I no longer gamble to avoid unnecessary talk later in the future.

Maybe later in future if you having a financial problem, she will end up telling you wasted so much money gambling and thats the cause of the problem which you facing, so be careful about what you tell her about your gambling activity.

Hahaha, that's really a funny situation with your wife. But whichever you think is the best, then do that. You'll probably get some good massage and happy hour with her when you always tell her that you've won even if you have not.

Did you do that already that you've told her you win but you did not? The initial reaction by her will surely be that good.

But you have to see her reaction after you finally admit that you didn't win.  :P

You're correct I think telling her the win is just the possible way out of this since that's the only result she is expecting, maybe when you incur loss you can swallow it all by yourself. But to be realistic woman can be so crazy most times, how could she possibly expect you to be wining everytime when she already know that gamble is a game of luck or does it mean that she's not aware of this? Because even without you telling her she is supposed to know that gambling is a game of luck. But to make everything easier don't let her know when you incur loss if it's not wining then don't share anything to her since wining is What makes her happy.

You know best what your wife's reaction might be, and you also know how to talk to her. The wife actually prioritizes what is best for us, losing money in gambling means financial loss and it affects both of us. So if you lose money while gambling, it's better not to share it with her if she doesn't gamble. Sharing your winnings at gambling will also increase your wife's expectations of you, since gambling is uncertain if you win today, you could lose tomorrow.

So I think you shouldn't share your gambling wins or losses with your wife, as this will be good for you and prevent you from creating unrest in the family.

Trust me it's best to keep quiet because it will be worst if she knows that you've lost it and she  got something to demand for a money and you'll not giving her any. Been into that kind of situation for quiet sometime and it's really a deal breaker if you're at a losing state. So, right now I'd better keep quiet lost or not.

Your wife would love and respect you more if you remain duty bound to the family and you perform it good too. She doesn’t care what you do while gambling or don’t do, that detail isn’t of much concerns to her. Just be a responsible family man and you are good.

Telling her about your gambling habits and wins would only create problems. Men and women are built differently and you would see that only after you spill what you shouldn’t have. Gamble responsibly and perform your duties by your family and you would be good.

There's no way you're getting around the wife on a topic such as gambling. If she scolds you for your losses, it's because that's how life is. When you win, you get the support of everybody and vice versa. If anything, the reason I recommend keeping it close to your wife is because when shit eventually hits the fan and you don't feel good about it, one of the fewest people on earth that can get you back to your feet to start trying again is your wife.

I remember one time I told my family my losses in trading, they scolded me and advised me to stop but when I won? Everyone went home happy. That's just the way life works. You can't change it by keeping it a secret.

There are things we don’t need to tell our partner if we already know they won’t understand or it will just bother them. So we keep it to ourselves. Gambling shouldn’t be something that destroys a good relationship. It’s supposed to be entertainment, something that helps us relax after a long day. A stress reliever. Yes, we lose sometimes, but that’s part of the game, and it shouldn’t hurt our pocket if we’re responsible enough to only use extra money for it.

They say a happy wife means a happy life, so just do what keeps her happy, even if it means keeping a few things to yourself.

Whether it matters a lot or not, since this involves money, it is right for them to know. At least we are honest with our partners. If you are a married person, your partner's opinion still matters. Of course, we can disagree with their opinion and insist, but we respect our partners, so we'd better acknowledge their inputs as well. This is the right way to communicate with each other to avoid misunderstanding. It is different if we are alone, as there is nothing to discuss about money and any financial matters.

It's up to us if we have to tell our wives, but it is better if we do.

I believe telling her when you lose doesn’t make sense if she behave aggressively. You are just making your wife suffer and share to your pain when you lose even if she is not the one who gamble.

Not telling her at all is the best thing to do and just give her the money when you won without saying a word.

You can’t blame her for lashing out to you when lose since your losses is her losses too while she might can’t handle the stress.

Hahaha, unfortunately, my wife never lets me gamble, so whether I win or lose, her constant nagging always hurts my ears. Even when I win big, my wife won't accept her winnings. When I transfer money to her, she immediately transfers it back and scolds me. It's too much trouble.

I enjoy gambling, but I'd be happier if my relationship with my wife was more harmonious, so I'm currently trying to quit gambling, and even if I do gamble, I don't dare do it in front of my wife. Again, it's too much trouble, but I love my wife very much, and it's impossible for me to leave her just because of my hobby (gambling).

Only tell her when you win. Just don't talk when you're losing so that you'll not get any bad words from her. I think that's just fine to think of when she's happy see you winning when you told her. If she has no idea of what's happening with your bets, just leave it like that and it's best if that's it. Because if you're not going to tell even if you win, and she knows how to dig up with your pc or whichever device you're gambling with, then it's a world war for both of you. So, just tell her the good outcomes and not the bad ones so that you both are simply happy.  :P

For me, since she is already your wife you should tell her everything that is going on because you two is already married so you two are we already so everything should be as one, keeping it a secret is not a great idea for sure that just means that your not trusting him with it, and on argument if she finds out it might end up getting worst right. So just tell her everything, and for sure it is better to be transparent that to make it a secret.
It is probably a normal reaction, I'm not judging, but you should just be honest about it and tell her that this is what you think about her. There might be an argument, but I believe that communication is a huge thing in a relationship.

As long as you know what you are doing and not really risking your finances on your gambling for me it should be all fine. She might be biased for sure if you are winning or losing, but it is going to be easily resolved since you are managing and budgeting as well. Much better is just to do things that is going to make her happy, I mean this gambling argument for sure is not going to last long if you are getting back on other things or just being responsible on other things.

Being happy when you gamble and win is very valid, but throwing heavy words at you when you lose your gamble hurts more. Women can be emotional sometimes, but I think her choice of words is the one hunting you. But this is where the frustration comes from. Sometimes when you lose and she is left with nothing to feed on because you gambled everything, it can trigger this kind of situation, but if you gamble responsibly and have something else to back up with, I don't think any woman will be hurt. ‎Just try and explain things to her, you know her better, but if it doesn't work out, like if she doesn't understand and you know you gamble responsibly the way you should, then you can decide to keep it away from her, both win and lose. Why did I say both? That's because if you only tell her when you win, she will assume the times you don't talk, you already lost a game and can still talk from that angle, so study her and follow what is right.

Tell her the truth Op, If you're with someone you see as a partner, you have to be loyal and tell her everything Right now you can do things without her finding out, but if she finds out later through another means , she'll be furious If you get used to doing things like this, later you'll do worse things, and if you do, she might not forgive you, If you truly love her, I advise you to do the right thing Don't make things up or play with fire.

As long as you can fulfill the family needs I don't think that you have to share things like this with your wife. Good communication is the key to good relationship but I'm not sure if your wife needs to be burdened with everything you do.

You should have known that women are emotional  being , so I don’t think you should tell her about your losses because it will always hurt her feelings especially when the amount is huge she feels you are irresponsible forgetting you are a risk bearer , the way to deal with her is just by telling her about your wins , and even if you tell her about your loss it should be small amount , if both of you are gamblers her understanding will be different, those money won’t be much for her , don’t stop telling her since you have already started it , I really don’t see it as a big deal being transparent to your partner, when there is a good  communication between you both , so no point of hiding things from her .

Your case is common and difficult one, which shows that your wife is only supportive when you win money because she is happy, and when you lose money because she thinks that money is wasted. Although keeping your results private prevents immediate fights, it may hurt trust, and therefore sharing less and making clear rules is best choice. Calm talk should be made to agree upon separate play money fund which will not touch family money, agree that gambling is only hobby and only tell her total money that you win as nice gift, which would get her out of fear of losing money and still allow you to play your hobby.

Because from the beginning of your gambling you have been open with your partner, so if you try to keep it a secret now, it will actually cause a more serious argument because basically a wife's instinct is very strong, they can know if we hide something from them, especially if they have already realized that our habit is gambling, then there is no point in keeping it a secret from them anymore, almost all of their wives tend to be more sensitive when it comes to finances, so what your wife did, I think it is a normal thing because basically we men will often be blamed by our wives even though sometimes we do good things for them.

For me I don't think sharing my gambling activities with my partner is really necessary because that we only bring more problem and misunderstanding in the house. Women are merely moved by good moments and easy times but becomes something else in tough times, Instead of craving for pleasantries from my spouse or whoever I will better keep it low to my self and stake what I can afford losing to avoid future regrets.

We have a much more interesting story, and it probably boils down to the premise of "I'll accept it if you gamble, but I won't forgive you if you cheat/having an affair." This is a common story we often hear from women.
For me, it's better to keep quiet about winning or losing a bet because there's no benefit in telling my wife. It's actually very dangerous to tell someone when they gamble excessively because they'll complain and keep saying they've wasted money on gambling.
Some people may be used to sharing stories about their gambling involvement, but not all partners may be so accepting, and sometimes it's better to just not tell anything.

From your story, I can see that you and your wife have been open from the start, both in winning and losing.
That's actually a very sweet situation in a marriage, even though there are situations you don't want to experience when you lose! What I admire about this incident is that you are a responsible person. I don't think it needs to be covered up any longer.
But, if I may suggest, be wise when you win! That's a situation that can change the situation when you lose later.

Lol 😂😂
My wife never knew I gamble until one day while she was asking me for money after I encountered some serious loss that left me broke, I told her I had no money with me at that moment, and then told her how desperate I was to get some money and that drive me to gambling with the little cash I had with me and unfortunately, I lost it, she blew hot and start blaming me for wasting money, she said she know that isn't my first time of gambling and losing money, that I've been gambling before and that each time i complain of not having money, its because I've wasted the money on gambling..

I learnt my lesson and ever since that incident, I never told her anything about gambling again, at a point, my neighbour won some money from a local casino and shared the joy with us, that night, she came to me and asked how far with my gambling, I told her straight up that I've stopped gambling since that last time, that it was my first and last, she was like, but I can still be doing it small small, that if I don't know how to, I could meet our neighbour to teach me, I told her I wasn't interested and that is it..

As a man, not every thing must your wife know about you, most women have this habit of rejoicing and taking glory when things are going well with their man, but when things go wrong, they immediately turn to put every blame on the man.

In a relationship it is not only about winning and losing but also about each other's mental comfort because if a wife feels uncomfortable when you lose it mainly comes from the fear of uncertainty and keeping your lose secret can avoid trouble for the time being but it can create distance inside. So in my opinion it is better to have a clear understanding between you and your wife by setting some specific limits and rules and even if you don't tell her the whole story. If you have a separate gaming budget then she will understand that the family's money is not being touched and you can also enjoy your hobby without worry. If you occasionally give her the winning money as a small gift or surprise then she will take it positively and then I think both transparency and boundaries will be fine.

Have you tried getting a new wife instead? ;D I'm just kidding! If your wife says that you are gambling too much, then she's probably right. ;)

She already knows that you are gambling anyway, so it doesn't make sense to hide the results from her. I think her reaction is pretty normal, people just tend to take losses worse compared to wins. She's probably just concerned that it might affect your family's budget. What you can do is try to communicate with her clearly, and set boundaries when it comes to your gambling. If you stay within a certain limit, it might give your wife some assurance and stop her from over reacting.

It is strange to ask such questions to other people. We don't know what your relationship is or the level of trust between you. In general, of course, not everything needs to be told. In your situation, it might make sense to talk only about the wins, and keep silent about the losses. If she ever figures out that it's weird not to lose and asks about it, then you'll answer, "No. Because I'm good at it. You said it yourself." What else can I recommend here? If your wife reacts so violently, of course, no one wants to be plunged into pessimism after a loss and still listen to accusations.

That will be good because communication can help him solve the problem. He can tell his wife that he is not spending too much money and separate the money from the other needs. He will discipline himself not to use the other money to gamble but to stick to the allocated gambling fund.

Perhaps it is difficult to convince his wife but he should try so his wife can understand that he is not trying to make money from gambling only for fun. If he loses, that is not a problem but if he wins, he can give the money to his wife.

Honesty and communication can prevent fights between him and his wife. He can playing gambling without thinking about what if he loses. He can ask his wife to watch him while gambling and remind him if he is almost breaking his rules.

Wise advice, and his wife at home also appreciates it when we're honest about our monthly expenses and where they're going. But I personally see it this way: before this, my monthly salary for household expenses would be fully utilized, but I'll find other safe and hassle-free ways to have fun.

Honestly, everyone here, more or less, benefits from winning. The money will come. Even when we tell our spouses, though sometimes they're indifferent, most of the time, they're happy to receive the extra cash, something they don't want to know or hear about when we lose. That's just what we often keep secret.

Since you have already noticed that she love to hear about your winnings that is very simple for you because you have already know her weak point. So you don't need to worry yourself too much after losses, just keep it to yourself and wait for the day that you would get another win that is how to deal with such people, or better still you keep quiet and do your things coldedly, after all she can not stop you from gambling.

The type of wife you marry depends on whether it is wise to tell her about your gambling wins and losses, if she's a nagging type there is no need to light gas in a fire. I know that women like success story so it's fine if you tell her about your winnings so far she's aware that you gamble but if when you lose and she doesn't take it well there is no need to worry her about the loses. Succeeding in marriage means applying wisdom, if you understand your spouse and know that she doesn't take loses and sad news well the best thing is to avoid telling her. If you must tell her you should be ready for the backlash.

Nobody likes losing, especially in gambling. Your wife nagging you for losing proves she's unhappy when you lose, and conversely, she's happy when you hear about your success with a parlay bet. Perhaps you could only tell her when you win, and keep quiet when you lose. So, don't even tell your wife about your bet before placing a bet, so even if you lose, no one will know. Also, try not to gamble too much, as it could be devastating. Doing it regularly is highly recommended.

Being honest and telling your wife when you win or loose is not a bad thing, it shows some level of trust and understand both of you share as couples but most importantly, you have to bet responsibly at all times. Women will always appreciate a Man that have money that's why whenever you win, you see so much Joy and happiness in her unlike when you loose and she blames you for gambling too much.

Seeing a woman that supports you in gambling is rare, they are hard to see so you having a wife that supports you in that aspect is a blessing. For you to avoid such reactions from your wife when you loose don't show her your looses. You have to apply a high level of wisdom while dealing with women because they are too emotional in nature and little things get to them easily so since you have observed and seen that she doesn't want to hear about looses avoid showing her and only show her your winnings.

With that kind of situation that the mood relies with your wins, and if you want to keep playing if I were that I keep manage my gambling acitivity or else shut my mouth telling whats happening. Well if you are kind of person who dont want to play thats the time you make secrets now, but if you are transparent to your wife and she knew your activity possible she will get suspicious at the same time reason why make it more responsibly because its the both of you with that money on the other mindset you can use that money to buy necessity with your daily needs.

Other people can't be controlled completely, the spouse decides what to feel over the conversation of the husband, she feels happy when he wins and sad over any loss of money. That's normal, who wishes to be happy over losing money excepts the fun gamblers. The wife isn't one either. What's best in regards to respect is to swallow the losses and claim like everything is right. This may work, yet, it's also expected to affect the gambling husband, if he loves sharing gaming activities with the wife, win or lose.

The gamer is better off with doing what they can control, and not bother so much about the reactions of the wife over a loss. It's absolutely normal. They should normalize celebrating when they win, and argue over Losing.

If in a family the husband earns the money and is the main source of income, it is expected that the wife will encourage everything that brings money, and react negatively to anything that takes money away. I think in your case you should not talk about every win or loss. If you really want to share your gambling results with your wife, you can talk about your monthly results, if of course there is something to show. And if most of the months are losing ones, then stop sharing this with your wife if you can't handle criticism.)

That's why it's necessary to know your partner, dating is a must before marriage,so you two can share everything to each other,to know if you can tolerate each other.  There is nothing to hide from your wife she should know if you're a gambler, and if she has no issues about gambling,then it's cool to share your win or lose to her, but if she's doesn't like gambling it's better you keep her out of your gambling business, never gamble in her presence, hide it entirely from her.

Women are emotional being and sharing your lost with her will traumatized her, you better keep her out of your gambling gist, so that tomorrow if things goes bad she won't tell people it's because of gambling.  This gender can use anything to give excuses when they don't want you anymore. Keep your family out of gambling that's my stake on this matter.

I can really relate to this scenario—it’s just so funny how they only seem to understand us when we win. But when we lose, suddenly it’s all our fault, and they’ll say so many things that can make us furious, haha.

As for the question of whether we should tell our wives if we win or lose, I believe we should always be transparent. No surprises—because surprises often lead to trust issues. If we’re not consistent, they might doubt us when we share something important that needs their opinion. In fact, this honesty could even be our motivation to win, not just for ourselves, but to impress our wives too.

It is always sweet and pleasing until there is a breaking point, then the patience of some or even many will be tested. women usually do have this kind of reactions to issues that concerns money, they even may be expecting a constant flow of the money without expecting a break at anytime. For someone like her who isn't a gambler, it will be difficult for her to understand that loosing can sometimes be part of the game and that is when she encouraged you to continue at a time because she felt you are good at it so she expects no loss seeing that you are good at it, maybe you should educate her some more about gambling so she will not have to blame you and make you feel like the cause of your losses.

Personally i will have a conversation with here where i will enlist all that can come with gambling, but what can go wrong and when it is right how it can feel and if i see its some thing she is okay with then i will always mention it to her as that will also help stay in check with my gambling habit but if otherwise, i will rather keep it to me so as to allow peace reign.

In my opinion, I think if your wife already knows that you're a gambler, you don't need to tell her about your winning and losses all the time unless she ask you, not telling her about it doesn't mean that you don't love her but just to avoid the drama you just spoke about. Or, you can be telling her about your winnings but don't tell her about your loss unless she asked you. My ex never liked me gambling, so I stopped telling her about it, she knew I didn't stop but she was okay that I don't involve her in any of my gambling talks or issues.

well i think you should inform your wife. if i would tell my wife about my crypto history more, and if i would listen to her i would be a rich man at the moment. especially for realizing the profits women are more systematic and logical.

In this case two things are involved, one if you are a gambler and your knows, there is know problem of you telling your wife that you have won a game but if by any chance that your wife is not aware and supportive in your gambling skills, i think there is no need of letting your wife know that you won a bet but you can still use the money to support the family any way you can, because you ever let your wife know that win, no matter he didn't support your gambling skills she will still follow share the money or eat more than you.

As long as we fulfill our obligations as husbands, whether or not we share our gambling wins or losses doesn't matter. After all, when we lose, we'll cover it up with our winnings.

However, to avoid situations like what the OP experienced, not sharing is a good choice, unless she asks, just as you said. I think there are better things to talk about than gambling. This is a household, so it's better to talk about things that can bring us closer and create more harmony. This is something we should choose wisely.

If that interests your wife in gambling as a whole, keep on telling your wins to her. But if that only gives her the thought of you by just winning, there is nothing wrong with that as well.

Your wife doesn't want to hear you have some problem with losing both of your money.

Why both of your money? your money is also hers.  :P

Just recently, a banking app had a lottery for those who use their services and receive cashback, and I won. I won about $100. I was completely surprised. After all, I've never won so much before. And the first thing I did was, when I met my girlfriend in the kitchen, I immediately went up to her and transferred half of the money to her card because I wanted her to share my joy. I want you to understand that many people who even think they won't tell their wife or girlfriend, I think they'll ultimately do it, in the pleasant rush of emotion.

Even our wife didn't care about our gambling life, but I believe it's a good idea to inform her. It is some way of acknowledging that she is part of our lives. Besides, this won't make us lose if we tell her. Instead, this helps build stronger relationships as a couple.

Nothing to hide - that should be the mindset of every couple. This may not look too serious, but I think we should just keep our wives aware of what we do in life. In fact, we have nothing to worry about if she already knows our gambling habits. But it will be difficult if we hide it from her.

Yep, talking to wife about our gambling will provide two valid reasons. First, by talking to her, perhaps we as husbands can better control our limits. Second, it can also help prevent us from gambling without control or maybe can stop gambling for some periode to cool down our emotion after lose. I've experienced this before, when I didn't tell my wife, I often gambled out of control. But talking to her helped me control my gambling money. Of course, I won't compare myself to others, as different woman can have different characteristics.

 Let's assume that it was actually his first time of telling her about his loss, I believe he has learned his lessons. Sincerely speaking I can't possibly keep my loss to myself without telling my partner because whenever I try doing such. It makes me feel kinda Way, because I'm this type that like being sincere no matter how bad it's more especially to my partner. And thank goodness I have a partner that understand things, I would say that his wife is lacking one thing which is understanding" because if it's someone that have understanding, first thing first is to cheer you up because you yourself is not happy to see yourself losing.

If your wife is okay with gambling, it might not be a problem to tell her about your wins or losses, because she's never had a problem with your involvement. But if your wife forbids gambling, telling her about a loss would be quite problematic. This might be true for some wives, but it's true for others, because you yourself said your wife will be sweet when she wins.

If this is the case, perhaps losing at gambling isn't something you need to talk about because your wife will only support you when you achieve a win, as you've described here. So, it is not difficult to conclude that when you experience defeat, it is appropriate not to talk about it because it is feared that it will be quite problematic and he will continue to complain.

You are absolutely right, as far as you are gambling within your budget, it won't be a problem to anyone including your wife and telling your wife about your gambling habit, is such a good thing for one to do, as the wife will help the husband not to gamble beyond responsible.

Also, it's important for one to take note of the policies of gambling, in order to be at the safe side, that is following the instructions of gambling will make you find gambling as a thing of fun and a place to double your money.

Your proposal is that he should manipulate his wife with information so he only gets the responses that he wants? Do you really think that this is good for the health of the relationship in the long term?  :D

It is definitely better to not talk about it at all compared to selectively manipulating information. I think how you described it is pretty well. An occasional gift can be a sign of sharing in your wins, it does not have to be verbal and she does not have to know where exactly it came from.

I believe the benefit of talking to someone about your losses who does not care, does not know or worse dislikes that you lost things makes no sense. It is more like a whining session. If you need support or want to vent it is much more appropriate to find someone who understands or shares the activity and talk to them, it will yield much better results.

It seems to me that you have learnt the wrong lesson here. Instead of fixing your gambling issues you created a divide between yourself and your partner, actively omitting important information from her. The real issue in your story is that you have problems with gambling to the point where you end up broke. A responsible gambler would never stoop to this level and let his losses cause such a situation. Perhaps it is wise to think about that instead of thinking about how to hide things from your wife.

It is literally your fault and only your fault for losing money in gambling, it can never be someone else's fault. Talk about childish running away from responsibility.

It will be better if you stop telling her about your gambling activities. Whether you win or lose, let everything be hidden from her. Because what is the point if it is only when you win that she reacts nicely but when you lose her reaction becomes bad toward you.

If you keep telling her about your gambling activities, it’s possible that one day it may lead to a serious fight. Wen your partner knows you are a gambler and she asks for something and you say you don’t have it, she may relate everything to your gambling activities, with insults that you won’t like to hear.It is very normal not everything we should tell our wives. There are certain things that are supposed to remain secret to yourself. But what I will still tell you is to gamble responsibly.

I can't imagine it because I'm not married or have a wife. But of course, when I have a family, I'll try to limit my gambling even more, and maybe even consider quitting. When married, family should be my top priority, above personal pleasure, because gambling is about my personal pleasure.

But now I have a girlfriend, and when I win big, she's very sweet and affectionate to me. But when I lose, it's a different story. Her ranting has gotten so intense it can even slightly deafen my eardrums. But I enjoy the ranting, and I don't blame her for it, because it's purely my fault for gambling too often, which ultimately leads to more losses.

I completely agree with your opinion, as honesty & good communication with our loved ones, especially our wives, are key to peace of mind when gambling. When honesty & good communication are maintained with our wives, it seems like no matter how much we bet, there will never be a problem. Before gambling, we can discuss with our wives first to agree on how much money we will use for gambling. This creates a mutual agreement that eliminates fear or loss because we have communicated honestly with our wives beforehand. Most importantly, when our wives know how much money they can afford to gamble, it is even better because it gives them control over the finances they have set aside & doesn't interfere with their primary income.

Most women don't like men with gambling attributes but it's selfish of the wife if she doesn't like gambling but celebrate the husband the day he wins money from gambling. Whether it's involved gambling or not, I think when you make money there should be limitation of exposure of financial information to your spouse, however this in anyway should stop you from doing nice things for her, I mean like the way OP makes money from gambling, he can do what she likes but doesn't have to inform her that the money comes from gambling.

You're right but she would definitely find out some day, to be frank I don't buy this idea of keeping your gambling habit as a top secret. aside from her complaining about the lost I want to tell you that there are some certain things she will prevent that's if you told her about your gambling habit, because sometimes you might be in a long losing streak at that time you may not know what to do due to frustration but having her beside you would make it easier as she will give you the Best suggestion so forget about the drama I think telling your wife about your gambling habit is very important.

It's certainly frustrating when you lose and your wife gets angry, but openness is essential, especially when it comes to gambling. Your wife will be happy when you win, and she'll also be angry. However, you'll unknowingly avoid addiction because your wife will continue to restrain you from wasting money on gambling.

As they say, with time, you gain experience and then learn things that you didn't know already. In my case, this thing has helped me a lot, because initially, I used to share everything with her, whether it's about finances or anything else in general, and then there used to be quarrels, arguments, etc. Over time, I realized that it's better that I don't discuss everything with her, and only share the things that I know won't cause any problems or become a reason for us to have an argument, and now I have a more peaceful life than before.

This is why, if something is not so important for your life-partner to know, don't mention it or talk about it, just keep it to yourself and that's it. There are a lot of things in life that if we don't share with our life-partners, we will avoid a lot of trouble and arguments, etc. So it's better that we learn a thing or two about what we should and what we shouldn't share with them.

If she is in support of your gambling activities no problem but if she is not in support, there is no need, because it will cause a huge problem amongst you after that period of Winning because she now knows that you are gambling and she might understand how gambling works, knowing fully that gambling wins are not often, except you prove not to be an irresponsible gambler to her, then the pressure might be less also if you meet up your daily responsibilities I don't think she will be boarder whether you win or not to the aspect of complaining, instead she will support and guide you not to fall into addiction.

If he is completely addicted to the point of selling things from inside the house to gamble, then I think it is valid for his wife to step in. But other than that, if he works he has every right to spend his money however he wants, as long as it is done responsibly. I think everyone should have a hobby and a pastime they enjoy, whether that is gambling or not. Otherwise, what is the point of living?

Anytime you know you are not in the mood to face her, either for her to attack you for losing or to praise you and be very sweet, you can just hide your gambling involvement from her so as not to be seeing her give you attitude based on the result of your game. Anytime you have missed her sweet nature, then you can bring up the winning announcement, but make sure you have enough money to prove you actually won that to her, as she might demand a gift.

We don't know what happens in gambling, most people lose control when they lose, so that's where the role of the wife comes in, in my opinion, to prevent us from getting too involved in gambling. As long as your wife doesn't forbid you from gambling, it means your wife supports your hobby. Unless you are really prohibited from gambling, there's no point in working.

This is such a convoluted question because you can't know one's relationship with their wife. And to say that anyone came to the gambling board to ask about family issues is odd in the first place. Ideally your lifelong partner should be trusted with all your information. If you can't trust them with mere financial information you're both doing something wrong.

it depends on the type of relationship you both have. if she doesn’t really support your gambling then keeping every win or loss to yourself might save you a lot of arguments. like moost partners react differently because they only enjoy hearing about the good side, not the losses but if you handle your responsibilities at home and you are not gambling recklessly, she may not stress you as much. The key is balance!! don’t hide things out of fear but also don’t share what will only create unnecessary tension

Oh man, this is a tough one because there is a difference between being choosing on what you day vs not telling your spouse things at all. I feel like overall some things just shouldn't be spoken and I also say that lightly because that is where it can become a big secret and a could lead to a terrible addiction

The feminine gender can be very dramatic by nature and that should be something we must understand so whatever response you get when you tell her about your losses should be expected, anyone who truly loves you would not want to see you losing because the moment she stops complaining that's even a bigger problem.

Generally speaking, I don't think it's best to tell her about all your losses because it could affect the trust and reliability level for you both, and she might begin to feel you're irresponsible with your gambling life and that could hurt your union. Specifically speaking, it also depends on the trust and understanding level between you both and how she can handle such information without breaking a fight.

It is also safe to understand that if she has no knowledge about gambling, you would have to accept whatever response you get because she does not know the system and how it works.

The truth is that women like money more than anything, so I think it's just a normal thing because there's no how your wife would feel happy when you are losing. It's not possible at all because they already know that gambling involves losses than winnings so she wouldn't feel comfortable when you tell her about losses, although it depends on the woman you married because I usually tell my wife everything and she always bear with me and give me some advice.

An interesting story, but if the situation is always reversed, it's best to hide your wins and losses from your wife. When you win, simply give her the money and claim you earned it from other sources or whatever. I completely understand this situation, and it's not a good idea to hide your wins or losses, but this is one of the best ways to stay comfortable while predicting sports bets without the pressure.

Tell your wife about everything, dont let money spoil relationship. Be a grownup. This is ridiculous if hide things and think you would give away with it :D Think what you would get or win if you do that? Dont have to listen how good or bad are you? You should not be afraid of that when you are adult. Talk with your wife about that, what you dont like or feel uncomfortable about. If you dont tell about gambling, that will make you safe only from hearing bad or good about your gambling, but you will still hear all that about the rest. Talking with wife is the solution to your situation.

It shouldn't be complicated, especially in the OP's case. He previously stated that his wife is quite happy when he wins at gambling, but when he loses, she might say he's wasting money and have other complaints. Therefore, it can be concluded that the wife is the type of woman who only cares about her husband's winnings, so in such situations, she shouldn't share any information.

Not all wives can accept their husbands' involvement in gambling, and perhaps each of us understands our partners differently, so each individual can come to a conclusion on this issue. If this question were directed to me, I would openly say I would never tell my wife about our gambling involvement as long as we were more prudent in how we spent our money.

If you win a good amount you should treat her to something nice, even if it’s just a meal out. But regardless of winning or losing, you shouldn’t be gambling with any amount that you can’t afford to lose. That way it doesn’t matter if you win or lose, it’s just a hobby, a bit of fun.

I think it is normal for those closest to us to be happy, and supportive when we achieve something, especially when we win at gambling. Likewise, when we fail, they will still support us in their own way, and I think their anger is a sign of concern for us. Actually, you are lucky to have a partner who is very supportive in all your situations. I am not in your shoes, but I think you need your partner as a good reminder to keep your gambling within limits, and I believe that is what a good life partner is all about. So, maybe you don't need to keep it a secret as long as your partner is a good supporter for you.

It will be wrong hiding things from ones pattern because nothing can remember hidden forever. The best is to let our partner knows that we are gambling. If it happens they don't like it, the best thing is to quit gambling and focus on things that makes you and your partner happy. However, if she is aware of your gambling habits then there's no need of hiding our winning from here or when we lose. So our partner can only be supportive of they like what we are doing but a situation whereby they don't it will be a different thing all together, the best thing not to keep our gambling habits a secret if we are to get our partner support.

Normally know one gets happy when he or she loses money, gambling is like when you get rich people rejoice with you, but when you get poor you alone Bears the pains.

It is not everything that you have to tell your wife because that gender are too emotional there is no way you should expect your wife to be happy when her husband loses money.
So i am on the opinion that you should not tell her anything that concerns your gambling, because tomorrow she will be the one to tell people that everything you do or thinks is gambling she will tell everyone about your gambling habits, but when you win she will rejoice with you so don't tell her.

For me, even after years of marriage I will still prefer hiding a few things from my wife. Wives are very sensitive and they will start screwing with our happiness in no time. I prefer not to involve my wife in a lot of things which includes hanging around with my friends, going on bike rides, gambling and even smoking often. I had to lie to her just for me to be happy. When I am happy, eventually even she will be happy so I feel like it's a win-win for both of us.

I will never tell my wife about gambling because gambling might sound a bit harsh even though we know the benefits. For one who has no experience in gambling, it might seem like an addiction and this might even ruin our reputation so I will prefer keeping it to myself.

Yes in this case I have said that he does not have a good wife, but people of similar level of flaw tend to attract each other. If she had principles and was a rational person then she has only 2 valid options. Either she is pro gambling and thus accepts both the winnings and losses or she is against gambling and it does not matter even if the husband is winning. In the case presented here she is just a pure emotional hypocrite. She is very selfish as she is interested in material rewards from huge successes from gambling but at the same time vilifies gambling as soon as anything goes wrong.

Oh many so many of you are extremely immature. A relationship that is built on secrets and lies is one that is deeply flawed and very superficial. You may even delude yourself that you have a strong bond, but such is the case with people that do these things. A healthy, mature and deeply developed relationship that facilitates the development of both parties is one that has no secrets of this kind. You share things, you discuss topics, you try to make good argument and develop a better understanding of everything in existence.

That sounds like a bad marriage and sounds quite sad. Why are you even with this person? Find a better wife or become a better person, whichever is more appropriate in your case.

If one of the couple wins in gambling, the love of the other will increase.  If one of them win, everyone will be happy, but if one loses, other try to blame. Since it is not possible to win regularly in gambling, one should remember the fact of losing. Therefore, one should not be sad even if one wins today and loses tomorrow. If one's husband or wife is not sufficiently educated, then if they are told about gambling, they may misunderstand more. Those who understand their partner's behavior towards gambling should share the issue of gambling.

But you ever thought about, what will happen if she found out about your gambling?

And you said you are hiding a lot of things which is not good in my opinion because we chose to hide those small things for our temporary happiness but if they found out all these in one day the reaction can be really hurtful for them, so try to include her slowly and see how it goes.

Women would always be women, they never change anywhere in the world and it's obvious that it's just a nature about them, and we men should just try and understand this and just know how to play along with them to avoid their troubles.

My friend I would just conclude that you made a mistake in even revealing to her every outcome of your gambling activities, there are certain things you ought not to let her know about. To avoid having troubles with her just continue with what you have started and make peace with yourself by expecting that you would always receive negative words from her knowing you lost your bet.

All gamblers hope to have a spouse who supports them whether they win or lose, but not everyone is that lucky. Broadly speaking, I can understand why some gamblers hide their gambling activities, while others are able to support each other. I assume this is largely influenced by their background in terms of beliefs, financial situation, and the environment they live in.

Meanwhile, I think that in building a household, essentially nothing should be kept secret, it’s about accepting each other’s strengths and weaknesses. However, when a family does not have a stable financial condition, gambling can become a source of conflict, and that is difficult to avoid. Therefore, I think we cannot entirely blame those who hide their gambling activities.

Is there no one here taking the position that all gambling should be done with their significant other? Then there would be no telling because they would be right there to see for themselves.

There is really no need for such if you ask me unless the wife is also interested in gambling. If not, what's the point of going to gamble together with her in order for her to know what the result was and save the husband the stress of explaining? And if that is even proposed, don't you think there will be some negative effect, or am I reading another meaning into your statement?

I am of the opinion that you are wife should know that you are a gambler but they condition or the result of things that happened in the gambling a wife shouldn't be aware of it, but I don't know why some people feel that telling their wife everything about them is quite right, even though your wife develop interest to know if you are doing well in gambling or not I will advise to never you review what you are passing through in gambling to your wife even though when you make a profit don't let her know. Because women alway feel emotional when something a man can handle without stress

If it's something that you do responsibly you won't really hesitate to tell her unless you are hiding some details.  Well, it all depends on the dynamic of your relationship, if you feel like she's not going to make it much of a big deal then by means you can tell her about it. You can tell her that you won some money from gambling but you can choose not to disclose the main amount of money that you won from it.  It is understandable if you choose not to talk about how much money you won specifically but it's good that you tell her you eon

Everything a man wants now is to maintain peace in his home, and everyone also knows the best way, which has been working for them. If you, as the man of the house, consider it okay to share your gambling result with your wife, I won't dispute that. If you also don't find it necessary, then you can go with it. As for me, the way to go with it should be dependent on how your wife reacts to it. If she's the one who can be biased, you will know what's best to do next time.

Why should I even tell my wife that I gamble in the first place?! That only applies when she is  not always cool with gambling.
Where I come from, declaring your accounts and profits to your wife is like adding a fresh problem to your list of problems.
For me, just keep quiet and allow yourself utilize those opportunities that you find.
I know the type of excitement that comes with winning a huge amount... You may even want to relate it to your friends; some might even go to the extent of bragging about their success and the rest.

Some partners would be fine with that setup as long as both of them enjoys. But one thing is we can't force our significant others to do what we're doing, like in gambling. If we like it and for them to have no problem with seeing us gamble, they have to gamble as well. This is a good idea though and everything can be taught and learned as long as both of you agrees to do it. And if there's no problem with the girls, they will also like to gamble but what if the situation turns over and it's them that starts to hide their winnings and starts to have that thought that they should hide their gambling activities to their husbands.  ::)

It looks like no matter if younwin or lose, you gain nothing by telling your wife.
When you win she's sweet but that's because she wants some of that money. When you lose she unloads on you.
Seems like you're being taken advantage of in both situations. Be smart and don't tell her, or stop gambling.

Obviously tell her. She is your wife. If you had a kid, would you still hide your expenses from your family?

Few questions:

Have you talked with her about the risks you are taking with parlays, and explained what you are basing them on to? Because “you’re good at that” response seems like you haven't.

Or are you letting her to assume that you are some kind of responsible gambling wizard?

And wouldn't she be happy if you won money, and even proud of you when she clearly believes it's about your skills.

Just to clarify: when you are losing money and it's affecting to both of you, then you are literally wasting too much money. What kind of response you were waiting exactly? Because it sounds like you were going for support.

I agree with you. Winning  and losing in gambling should always be kept to myself. I do not think it is appropriate to tell anyone else. After I win money in gambling, I may tell my wife out of emotion, and we can spend this money together. But when I lose money  in gambling , can I share it with my wife ? And if I share it, will she accept it well? I am sure that all women or wives , after hearing about losing money in gambling, will advise us  not to gamble anymore. So when I cannot share the matter of losing money in gambling with my wife, why should I share the  matter of winning?

If I have more money due to winning in gambling , maybe I can buy a gift for her, surprise her. But I am not willing to  share the matter of winning in gambling with my wife.

For someone like me, gambling is just my personal adventure although my partner knows that I gamble and at that I respect myself not to put it to their faces each time I am around those family members that don't gamble but at the same time always around me, much thanks for bearing me, but I try as much as possible to keep all my gambling outcomes from my partner.

No, there is nothing to understand as such behavior is always bad. Either you need to change your spouse's view, yourself or get a different partner. Having secrets about things like this is never the answer, it is a very bad sign. No wonder so many marriages are failing these days, you guys are failing even at the basics!

What kind of conclusion is that man? A person is gambling when their family finances are not good and you say that they are not at fault here? The lesson is to stop gambling, everything else is wrong.

How is this better? Instead of risking 1 person to addiction you should risk both at the same time?  ;D

Nice misogynistic answer, no surprise there. The irony in this post is that most men in this topic are completely stubborn and would rather have secrets from their partner instead of changing their bad gambling ways and becoming better persons.
You love staying an undeveloped and uneducated human at the same time ranting about women.  ;D ;D

Hiding the wins from your partner can easily create problems later. Even if you are not doing anything excessive, secrecy is what usually causes trust issues, not the gambling itself. It is good that you are already being considerate around family members who do not like gambling, but being open with your partner and at least about the important parts which is just as important.

I am a new husband haha recently married, I enjoy my gambling sessions with my wife and she’s also a great help for me dealing with a loss or win. I barely have time for gambling, to be honest, but when I do, she’s always around, enjoying when I gamble and
Well, your story is different than mine, not judging or comparing, and also nobody should judge here because it’s about gambling only, that’s a normal reaction for any person when money is wasted… however, it’s better to talk that with your wife instead of making it a public topic.

My opinion shouldn’t be taken seriously, but I think it’s better to focus more on the gambling part instead of the results, in another way, I mean it’s better to decide whether you keep gambling or to stop forever since your partner is not okay with you spending money, especially if she has spendings at home.

For me many men don't Gamble wisely, when a man is using big money that will subtain the family me as a lady I will be angry, because excess of everything is bad, when gamble do it smartly, hence you have already started telling her before now it will be wrong for you to stop telling her, we ladies, we always have a way of reacting over something, at times we totally forget that there's a time to win or lose.

Congratulations bro...

You are so lucky have a wife that able to control your gambling activity. The woman like her was very rare i guess. If you have someone to control your gambling, i believe there will be no over limit happens anymore. Most gambler lose their control because no one supporting him and give a good advice while they are lose or win. So, they used their win to another betting or even more higher bet. After that, they lose everything and trying to betting more with additional deposit. You will not have this experience anymore, because you have good wife to help you manage your money and your gambling activity.

You're free to opine your thoughts base on however you comprehend, it doesn't make of me what your opinion is, it's just your opinion anyway base on how you read what I wrote there. Misogyny is a strong word, which am not one especially not for a man that grew up among lovely women who of course had their own flaws just as every other human male. Nevertheless, thank you for your judgement, it just reminded me of someone very DECENT I once knew ;D

When someone loses a large amount of money and gambling, it is natural that it will cause family unrest or marital unrest. Because a wife will never want her partner to suffer financially or have a negative impact on their life. When gambling has a negative impact on your family or money, it will definitely become a little difficult for you to handle your family relationships and financial stress. So you should maintain restraint. And if gambling affects your financial system, mental peace and family, then you should definitely inform your partner about it. Because it involves trust and responsibility.

It is also true that if you do not share your gambling with your partner, then later if your partner knows about your gambling, then a big problem can arise. Again, such a situation can arise that after knowing, she is constantly monitoring your gambling. If you have any financial problems, she will think that you may have lost that money due to gambling. If you tell her, it is a problem and if you do not tell her it is also a problem. I think that if you tell all these things, you will not have your freedom. You should continue gambling as long as you can without telling her. If there is a big win or financial issue, you should tell your partner about it.

I also think we need to be careful about this and think it through carefully before telling. We need to remember that if we tell, there's no turning back, because my wife might start thinking about many things, including whether we'll become gambling addicts—the worst-case scenario. After all, someone in the neighboring country might have lost TV sets or part of their salary and now they have nothing to feed their children with. Overall, I think this creates a lot of problems, and I prefer never to tell my wife about it because I simply don't want to waste time on meaningless explanations of trivial things. I'd rather spend that time improving my gaming skills, which could actually pay off, like increasing my win rate, for example.

I talk to my wife about my gambling but when I share it with her, if I win, she doesn't get too excited about it but when I lose, my wife doesn't tolerate it like your wife and tells me a lot. I feel like I shouldn't share all this with her, but even though I always share everything, sometimes I don't tell her about my losses because she will scream at me when she hears about my losses, so I'll keep that secret from now on.

Actually, wife can always accept their husband's win but if they lose in any way, they say different things. Although it can be said that it is a habit of women, my wife does not say anything about it much. I myself never share it with her because my wife does not like gambling at all. However, I play games in casinos for my own pleasure. If my wife sees me playing games, I explain to her that it is a free game, there is no loss here, usually it is for enjoyment.

I know she's supposed to be your partner, confidante, and gist mate, and you are supposed to share almost everything, but she clearly does not like to hear about the losses, so don't tell her anymore. Only tell her about the wins if you have to, and make her enjoy it too by doing the things you used to do whenever you win big.

I think it mostly depends on the individual. In the case of the OP, his wife gets real happy and even supportive whenever he gets a win on his bets and it's safe to assume he won't be getting any loving whenever he lets her in on his gambling losses. I think If only she was more receptive to his losses as she was to his wins, he wouldn't find it so difficult to let her in on his gambling activities. I bet he would appreciate his significant other cheering him on, encouraging him when he losses and perhaps being the level headed one to know just when it's time to quit.
But seeing as the wife isn't as open to his losses as to his winnings, I think it's safer he keeps most of his gambling activities to himself.

What I wrote is not an opinion, it is factual observations based on science. Males are as flawed as females or even more flawed, so a male calling out some woman for being flawed is a joke especially in the thread here. Most people who wrote an answer are completely immature and have bad lives and relationships.

This one is where you are right and doing things the right way. Keeping sessions together but limited so there is no risk of developing the addiction in any of the two of you. This is very important when one includes another person in a risky activity like gambling. Sometimes the invited person is the one who slowly develops a huge addiction and it creates a nightmare.

There is no reason to not judge or compare, this is where you are mistaken. Stories are there to be scrutinized, discussed, debated. Why should I not judge someone who does things the wrong way? You also have topics on which you would judge someone, and if you don't you need to reconsider whether you have an identity or you are just a floating nobody in this world.

I guess that’s just the nature of our spouses. My wife is the same way. Like when she knows we’re winning, she’s super happy and acts like she’s going to spoil me or treat me like King. lol
 But when we’re losing, it feels like she’s ready to kick me out of the house. That’s why it’s really best not to tell them when you lose. But when you win, it’s okay to share so everyone stays happy.

After all, you know what they say; happy wife happy life. Right?

Maybe you're just losing in the wrong timing?

Of course if we feel that our money is wasted instead of buying groceries or any essential, we will get mad and yes, it's normal to be happy when you know your partner is getting money. But I think you should step up and you should realize that gambling isn't a way to earn money. Of course you should be honest to your partner, they don't want you to get ruined by gambling and the fact that you want to hide it to your partner, there's something that you should see in this situation. Gambling addiction starts a small problem, and it gets bigger once you've tried to hide it, let them know your activities, they will support you no matter what but if they feel that you have no control, it's normal to get angry in the situation.

With your explanation I can possibly conclude that your wife is indeed an understanding wife, and surely woman Love good things (money) but even as that they are supposed to understand their man whenever he share his losing experience with them, perhaps they are even supposed to be happy to see them doing that because it shows a sign of honesty because not everyone that can possibly do that so they are meant to understand and also know that losing is inevitable in gamble because it's almost impossible for you/ or gamblers to be having just one record (win) all the time without incurring loss at some point so this is just  something they have to understand and stop blaming their partner for incurring Loss.

Basically, the decision is yours, as you'll know which option is best for you. However, rationally, I think it's best to keep it a secret.

You could tell your wife that you've stopped gambling. The reason is that most of the time, you'll lose more than you win due to the house's advantage. Wouldn't this mean your wife would scold you more often than she would praise you? This would certainly lead to arguments, so I think it's best to keep it a secret.

No to me I will rather hold my peace than telling my wife about my winnings or not it's very bad communicating with your woman about your gambling habit,when. You win or lose , don't let her know your side hustle, because if she knows your secret now ,when you didn't win she will be using it against you, calling you gambler ,so hold it and never let her knows

As a cure responsible gambler, is very important to be open in everything you are doing, so for some reason if and when you make some losses or winnings you can celebrate or bear the pain with your partner.

Also for you may have to study her mod of reactions to things that create anxiety such as gambling and if you see that it affects her mood, then you have to stop telling her about your gambling results.

Factual observations based on science! Unlike other laboratory scientific studies, am sure you're aware that most studies on human behaviours carries some bias as a result of abrupt changes in human behaviours which could put the accuracy of some of these observations in doubt.

I would still repeat it that both male and female are with their flaws whether you think a man is with much flaws than the woman is what I wouldn't go into further debate with, which doesn't make me accept your opinion still. And going back to the story that led to this supposed debate, it's about a man complaining about how his wife suddenly become happy when he wins his bet but through tantrums at him when he loses. What does that make of her, less flawless I guess?

If your wife is friendly, then any permit gambling then you may share when you win as she is the part of your life. But if your wife is not friendly and are not comfortable about gambling then you should not share anything whether you make profit or loss. But if you think your winning might be able to make money then you may share the winning.

That bias is known, factored into the studies and not worth mentioning because of that.

The man here and most other men who responded are more flawed and they are often completely immature. You can see most responses are childish. Most of these people don't even know what it means to have a real partner and spouse, they really just have a roommate with whom they are intimate sometimes. But hey, as long as you deny the reality of your relationship then it isn't true right?  :D

Great, then she can hide every single thing that you don't like from you and let's see where that takes you. Don't complain too much when you find her with another romantic partner.  :D Most of you have no idea what it means to be married and most of you are married, it is pretty sad what you are doing.

I don't think sharing every win or loss makes sense. If you're a good player and manage to withdraw your winnings, then share them when you do she'll definitely appreciate it. But everything else can be kept under wraps, because every loss will only add to the negative attitude toward gambling. And every win won't mean much if you alternate them with losses you won't talk about. So gambling is your game, and you can keep it your own business, and I think that's the best solution.

Hi )

I think you’re right. It’s best not to tell your wife anything at all. It’ll keep her calm, and it’ll be better for you too — your ears won’t hurt anymore. Women should stick to the things they enjoy, their own “women’s stuff.” And football, poker, sports betting — that’s men’s business. It’s better to talk about that with your buddies at a bar or at work.

If you’re married and something involves money, especially winnings, it’s usually best to tell your wife. It avoids misunderstandings, builds trust, and turns the win into something you can enjoy together instead of something you have to hide.

Most people outside the gambling circle don’t really get the swings, so all they see is “you’re losing again” or “oh, you got lucky once.” Neither changes their attitude.
End of the day, gambling is a personal ride.  But the day-to-day ups and downs? no need to broadcast them. Keep your bankroll and your sessions to yourself, stay disciplined, and avoid giving anyone extra reasons to judge your hobby.
 That’s how most long-timers handle it anyway.

Yes, ;D ;D Everyone has their own class. Women's affairs are still different in many ways, unless they have the same hobby as him, then they can be in the same class.

if not, just be prepared our ears will always be close and use headsets.

I disagree with you. It is better to keep personal matters outside the family, as you said about informing wives about gambling. It would be a good idea to not share financial matters with your wife, especially if your wife is not involved in earning. The earning wife may understand the reality of earning money, but those who are busy with household chores will try to stop you from doing any activity that will cause you to lose money. Even if they know that you gamble, most of them will not consider it normal. This is another reason for family unrest.

We have different views and different choices, so it is natural that some people choose to disclose their gambling habits while others choose to hide them. I myself tend to hide it, but even so, I don't say that telling your partner about your gambling habits is wrong because sometimes it is better to be open about it.

Some partners may not like it for certain reasons, such as fear that it could lead to addiction, which could impact the family's finances, but others may accept it as long as there is discipline and reasonable behavior.

Women are a very unusual personality type because we men constantly try to understand everything rationally and logically. But for women, the world is structured in cycles that they constantly experience emotionally. After all, nature made them this way, and because of this, they have constant mood swings.
Therefore, it's better for a woman not to know that her husband has won a lot of money, because she can always start making emotional decisions at that moment. And then accuse her husband of being greedy or delaying spending the money. A man, however, will always be cold in his logic.

If husband did not tell that he has won a lot of money, that will make him greedy. One day he will make a mistake and truth will came out :D Then he would be in double trouble, in worse situation. I just cant imagine how to avoid or what to tell if I would be asked, why I hid the fact that we are rich now? What would you do if you were in such situation? Try to justify yourself by saying that you hid money because your wife would spend them unwise if she knew you are rich? That would disappoint her even more.

This is a very controversial issue, because in my life I have met many different women and I got the feeling that some were absolutely phlegmatic and they led an emotional lifestyle, not giving themselves any responsibility for their actions, subject to fleeting desires, and for such people, gambling should be banned altogether. Girls like that will never be able to manage money properly. And if they hit the jackpot, within a month they'll have spent it, quarreled with all their friends, and forced their husbands to do the same.
But at the same time, I met girls who were mostly technical by profession, and they were always balanced and not prone to emotions.

Why won’t you want to tell your wife when you win?  Because for me I don’t even mind if my man gambles, because I gamble sometimes too. It’s not that deep.
The only time I would not be happy about is if he starts using money meant for important things to bet…  But as long as he is doing it safely and not risking what we need, I am totally fine with it. Keeping wins a secret just makes it look some how.

This is not true. When you get married or even more when you get children there is nothing that remains personal. Everything affects those people involved especially activities as gambling. You may not want to accept this loss of autonomy but that doesn't change that it is the truth. Many people like to deny the negative effects of their behavior on others for this reason.

In this case you don't have a wife or a family, you have a roommate. Don't confuse blood relations for family, those things are not the same. You can be legally married to someone but in reality your relationship is that of roommates. The difference between a real partnership and roommates is huge. It is clear that very few people here understand that.

Most men are exactly the same way. Just because different emotions are expressed and in different ways, that does not make them different or better.

Well that's really funny but that's women nature, expecialy when it comes to Gambling. My Mom will will always blame my dad of gambling and losing money that would have been useful to the family, but this only happens when there is loses, but when there is winning she will blame my dad of not playing that game for her to also win. That is what my dad faces at home always. The best way to to be free is not telling her how about your wins and losses because you must surely be blamed in time of loses and praised in terms of wins.

It works the other way around too if a wife loves to gamble and ends up losing money, her partner will probably blame her as well. That’s normal, because for people who don’t like gambling, it often seems like a bad habit no matter who does it. Personally, I just keep quiet about my gambling hobby because I know my wife is strongly against it. When I win, I enjoy it and when I lose, I don’t chase my losses. It’s definitely easier to communicate when you have a partner who supports your hobby, but unfortunately, not everyone is that lucky.

Your story made me laugh. Such is life. And what I will advise you, you have to tell her whenever you win so you will have sweet Soup to eat and pizza and enjoy the other room kisses. And also tell her your loses, though they will bring issue and it looks as if you are not giving are money and you used it for gambling and lost them, yet tell her the truth, one day things will change for good. Though that day you won't eat in the house because you didn't win money.  And if she asks you, if you have not gamble that day, tell her that, you have but you haven't checked the games. And if you loss tell the the truth, the matter what, she won't kill you.

Everything is just understand, if you know the kind of partner which you are having, that’s what’s going to determine something’s which you going to be telling your partner. I know we are not suppose to hide things from our partners, but if you know your partner isn’t cool with some kind of things, it’s better you don’t even tell them.

From the OP post, his partner is always happy whenever he wins, but whenever loss sets in, she is always complaining, then he should stop telling his wife about his gambling activities, because there is no way you will be a gambler and you won’t be losing, loss will definitely set in, and the loss is already causing problem for him.

Like you expect this experience is more common that usual. Alot of partners would reeact based on the outcome of the gamble rather than just your habit. When you win money its good thing to them becasue the monney multipled but  the moment lose, just like you said they start complaining. In your case your wife is responding emotionally because she's unsure how gambling affects the household long-term. If you explain to her your gambling budget that doesn't affect your relationship or responsibilities. That way, whether you win or lose, its already agreed that it wont hurt anything. once she know your gambling is controlled, the pressure around it is reduces alot.

There is nobody that will hear there husband lose bet that will be happy about it. You don't have to blame her for the way she react to your loses and that is what most people will do. I think she is very concerned about your winnings that's is why she feel upset about your loss.

People are mostly attracted to positive things that negative ones and that is why you need to understand her and not feel angry because you lose bets. If gambling is unpredictable, you  dknt have to expect her to smill when you lose bets. You will have to continue trying your best so that you can be making profits from your bets so that can make her really happy and not feel too emotional about you losing money to a casino.

My point is, if you are married and again this is just for the married men, if you should win money from the. Gambling you did then you should be able to tell your wife because when you hide it even when you think you are doing that for peace, one day she is going to find out and feel betrayed.  For most women, that betrayal they feel in their minds hurts more than the money itself.

I feel like if you should share it with her, even not necessarily the exact money, if you know that by her nature you would draw out unnecessary bills as a result. Because there are peculiarities which is based on the personality of your spouse that you should also put into consideration. But if you still go ahead to tell her about the wins, it helps you guys to build your relationship and makes her feel part of your life. Hiding money from your spouse being it man or woman creates secrets that slowly destroy many marriages today.

On the other side, if your wife does not work and only takes care of the house and children at home, then there are chances that she might worry about money alot because she sees how hard it is to manage expenses on a daily basis and she may not like you to engage yourself in gambling because she is afraid that you will lose even the little money you have to take care of the house but even at that you should still try to find a way to inform her so she will feel involved or in the positive way, help you to leave gambling when it is not your calling.

It is at that point you should also tell her that the money you are touching is from your personal pocket and not from what has been allocated to the family for their own needs that you will never touch it. When see sees you are responsible and open to her, she will slowly accept it or at least trust you more because hiding it will make her angry and more afraid to believe in you whenever she found out.

As a man and husband, if he wants to share those things with his wife, that's fine. If he doesn't share them, I don't think it's a sin, but I believe it's something one shouldn't be selfish about Sharing it isn't wrong, as long as a man's money is for the family , for the children, for them too, so there shouldn't be a problem with it.

Well, sorry to break it to you, Grace, but not all women are as understanding enough like you, and it's a fact. There are so many housewives who wouldn't even like their husbands doing something that they like doing, why? Because the wife doesn't like it, and even if she doesn't dislike it, she would still ask you not to do that because she believes it takes up a lot of the husband's time that he could spend with her. It's so frustrating sometimes, because such women will make you feel like you have no life anymore, and you can't do anything that you used to do because you like doing it.

So, gambling could be one of those things, especially when we know that gambling involves finances, which means one can either win or lose money in it. So a wife would never want their husband to lose any of the money he earns on gambling, she would instead want it spent on her, and this could always become a reason for a fight. So for me, I think it is fair even if you hide the fact that you gamble to your life, winnings are a far thing.