Updated smoothie Trollkit: v.1.2, see #11
this is a Special One Time offering for 2.5BTC.
i've put together my latest publication. it's called "The smoothie Trollkit". no, not Toolkit, Trollkit. here are the first several chapters:
1. lol: alot. makes you look happy but in fact you're mad.
2. Font Size: type in the largest font you can find. if your forum software doesn't have at least font size 1000, i can sell you a software package add on for 2.5 BTC.
3. Color strategy: use lots of
RED.
BLUE is good too; its just that red works better.
4. Kiss:
you disarm your opponent by making him think you love him.
5. Volume: pull out of your ass as many accusations and insults as you can hoping that at least more than half will stick. it truly doesn't matter if they're true or not. the point is to overwhelm your opponent. its like Keynesianism for trollers: more is always better.
6. Finish: always get the last word in. always.
7. The Honesty Effect: claim that you're impeccably honest. even though you know you're scum.
8. Math: if you get caught using dishonest #'s just claim you're bad at math. example: "you mean 2+2 doesn't = 5?"
8.5 Nit Pick: if you look hard enough you'll be able to find inconsistencies in everyone's English. focus on that even if it is trivial.
9. Emotion: and here's the
most important tip of all (they're all important). act as though you are APPALLED at your opponent's behavior. it will make you look righteous.
10. Play dirty: modify your opponents posts like that which exists at the beginning of this thread. what the hell, you might just get ppl to believe.
11. Frustration: as in how to deal with. from time to time you will get frustrated; after all, you
are an idiot troll. so the way to deal with it is with a technique patented by Master Troll smoothie and never seen before. Finish, as in #6, and then LOCK THE THREAD. this way your opponents can't even respond. brilliant!
this offer only lasts thru the end of this month.