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Author Topic: Youths Becoming Reluctant to Marry  (Read 273 times)
Odohu (OP)
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July 11, 2023, 09:56:27 PM
 #1

My country people. E get wetin I dey observe for we country wey I wan make una follow me put mouth. I notice say our young bobo them no dey too marry early again. My papa tell me say for their time, before you reach 25, you done already marry or about to. But today, 30 self never put marriage as priority. Plenty good reasons dey sha o but some their reasons no reason enough to be single at certain age.

I don take one eye come observe plenty set of guy men them for this our time and they belong to some of these categories as e relate to man and woman something:

The Fear Fear Group: This na the group wey dey fear marriage like say tomorrow no dey. For their mind, marriage go tie them down and make them no get freedom again. If you wan scare person wey belong to this group, just tell am make him go marry Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy

The Confused Brothers aka Fine Boys: These na those fine bobo them wey women dey hardly say no to. Them fine die, so na girls dey rush them. Normally, them be ashawo because no type of woman them never harvest; from the ones them chase to the ones wey chase them. Unfortunately, them dey suffer to select wife. If care is not taken self, most of them dey marry girls wey no too catch attention and you go come dey wonder weda na brother solo the ladies spec marry this girl or na another person.

The Tasters Association of Nigeria : This group wan taste all the soup for this world... if you talk about marriage near them, them go use excuse frustrate you wey wan advice them.

Dangote Group: This group wan become Dangote first before them marry. You see this set, unless we plan for them, find one woman force her on them, them ready to reach 45 before them marry.  We know say money dey important for marriage but they no dey pursue money finish.

If you are still single and an eligible bachelor, oya take microphone and tell us the group you belong to or add your own if e no dey for the list.

R


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July 11, 2023, 10:26:19 PM
 #2

My papa tell me say for their time, before you reach 25, you done already marry or about to. But today, 30 self never put marriage as priority. Plenty good reasons dey sha o but some their reasons no reason enough to be single at certain age.
Maybe in Southern part. Go to North and see the difference. It has been estimated that by 2050, Nigeria population could surpass 1 billion if they continue to reproduce the way they are reproducing and nothing changed till now. More population are coming from the Northern part and they marry fast. Especially their females.

In the South, check those that just passed though senior secondary school and never go university, or those that did not go to secondary school at all. You will noticed they they marry fast.

In the North, as many of them get educated, many more do not get educated like people in the South.

Southerners do not marry and give birth fast again like the Northerners do.

Education is somehow related to this.

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Odohu (OP)
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July 11, 2023, 10:41:01 PM
 #3

My papa tell me say for their time, before you reach 25, you done already marry or about to. But today, 30 self never put marriage as priority. Plenty good reasons dey sha o but some their reasons no reason enough to be single at certain age.
Maybe in Southern part. Go to North and see the difference. It has been estimated that by 2050, Nigeria population could surpass 1 billion if they continue to reproduce the way they are reproducing and nothing changed till now. More population are coming from the Northern part and they marry fast. Especially their females.

In the South, check those that just passed though senior secondary school and never go university, or those that did not go to secondary school at all. You will noticed they they marry fast.

In the North, as many of them get educated, many more do not get educated like people in the South.

Southerners do not marry and give birth fast again like the Northerners do.

Education is somehow related to this.

You are right, I no actually put the Norther Nigeria into consideration. Their custom and tradition actually makes early marriage easier. However, I no too cherish the pace they are going in terms of population that is not well taken care of... these are the outcome of their marriage system.

R


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July 12, 2023, 08:38:38 AM
 #4

The Confused Brothers aka Fine Boys: These na those fine bobo them wey women dey hardly say no to. Them fine die, so na girls dey rush them. Normally, them be ashawo because no type of woman them never harvest; from the ones them chase to the ones wey chase them. Unfortunately, them dey suffer to select wife. If care is not taken self, most of them dey marry girls wey no too catch attention and you go come dey wonder weda na brother solo the ladies spec marry this girl or na another person.
Fine boy wey no get money for pocket na palaza. Those fine boiz wey dey end up marrying ugly girl na because say them no get money. For Nigeria now na money girls dey marry. Ugly man wey get mad funds go marry miss world.

The Tasters Association of Nigeria : This group wan taste all the soup for this world... if you talk about marriage near them, them go use excuse frustrate you wey wan advice them.
These set of boiz just dey play before them go know an for old age them go marry and by then them no go get choice again.

Dangote Group: This group wan become Dangote first before them marry. You see this set, unless we plan for them, find one woman force her on them, them ready to reach 45 before them marry.  We know say money dey important for marriage but they no dey pursue money finish.
I pity for this set of boiz because them go end up not marrying if them no make money. OP, one thing wey I also want make you understand be say no be everybody God create say go marry and nobody everybody go marry at a particular age. The way wey all fingers are not equal,this apply for marriage side too. Some ready to marry but no see girl to marry them

R


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July 12, 2023, 09:31:09 AM
 #5

My brother , the mata weu you yearn hold weight but make I still clear you small. The problem in our society can be listed as follows:
 Money spent on marriage ceremony is enough for the new family business start up.
 The process of marriage enacted by some religious organization are far from reality and becomes more difficult for young people to follow it.
 The ladies of this generation are full of high expectations that can not be met and that has led some young guys to believe in making money first.
 Another issue encounter with delay marriage saga is that  some family have failed in their parenting and that has created another vacuum in successful marriage.
 Some are afraid of marriage not because they are not well to do but due to the history of failed relationship and other people's marriage.
 Some young people are afraid of what the future will be, considering the economy situation of the country.


My take on the whole thing , is that there should be a means of educating young singles and families about parenting, and living in love.

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July 12, 2023, 12:38:41 PM
 #6

My country people. E get wetin I dey observe for we country wey I wan make una follow me put mouth. I notice say our young bobo them no dey too marry early again. My papa tell me say for their time, before you reach 25, you done already marry or about to. But today, 30 self never put marriage as priority. Plenty good reasons dey sha o but some their reasons no reason enough to be single at certain age.
On the contrary, I no dey observe d same tin way u dey observ. Watin Me I dey see b say, youths now dey marry quick. Persn cef way jst leave en papa house nd e hit any better money frm any means, na marriage go b d nxt tin on en mind. Dat no mean say, e no go stil dey carri olosho bt, 3 understnd watin olosho dey tak frm am nd him kwa need persn way go attend 2 en needs lik 2 dey wash cloth, prepare food, clean house nd d rest way concern wife 4 marriage following our African tradition. Especially wen pikin nevr join b4 e go start 2 dey need house help.

On top of dat, d idea say mak pikin follow papa nd mama dey grow dey very strong now dan in d 90s.

Mayb na ur area u dey observe dis one u dey talk ndi understnd say, man dey try avoid load way e nevr dey sure say e ft carry bt on top of dat one, pple way stil dey risk am dey kwa.

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July 12, 2023, 12:49:27 PM
 #7

Well I no belong any groups but I am happily married.

See ehh e get plenty things me wan analyzed here; Marriage is not about money either about fineness or acquiring all things of the world. But marriage is about accepting Responsibility, and also Compatibility, I believe most of you here have came to my wedding and  my Child Dedication and witnessed how it was. I got married when I have settled for less meaning I have came to accept reality that 1 Age is no longer on my side, 2 I know that is my core Duty to father a Child, 3 Someone gives birth to me so I must do so 4 Accepting the responsibility 5 Compatibility (Companionship).

If you understand the meaning of companionship you will marry. Before I was thinking I still had time to spend and flex my life but after I came to draw some analysis about marriage and singlehood I instantaneously changed my mind look for Compatibility when I got it i then say no need to waste time. After which I boiled out to see her parents and every thing began without wasting of time, not that i had Millions or Billions but just managing as others out there.

In summary when you are ready to accept responsibility you will get married not even money that will hold you down because marriage they said is a blessing from God. Proverbs 18:22 "The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the LORD". So do you still need money to marry when God said when you find a wife you find money.

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July 12, 2023, 03:18:57 PM
 #8

I believe single brothers in dis house will take a good step to stand with one girl in a strong relationship that will lead to marriage. And it will be a good thing if Bitcoiners can marry bitcoiners and dey will give birth to wealthy children, but I don't know why some of our guys here are afraid of toasting us than to take us as just a friend in dis forum. Like dat fear fear group, I think we have those guys pretty here, because money is not their problem but dey are afraid to marry a wrong person that will know all their crypto personal details because, as husband and wife you must show your wife or husband every single things you have in d house, and there are some women if you don't show dem, dey will be looking for way to know were all those things is or dey well make d home look like hell to u unless u show dem .

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July 12, 2023, 04:46:05 PM
 #9

If you are still single and an eligible bachelor, oya take microphone and tell us the group you belong to or add your own if e no dey for the list.
My group na I de wait for God's time oo because I no get anything wey de stop me, just that I never jam the right girl wey suit my taste. Although, I for they the confused brothers group, but somethings wey u mention for there make me run.

You are right, I no actually put the Norther Nigeria into consideration. Their custom and tradition actually makes early marriage easier. However, I no too cherish the pace they are going in terms of population that is not well taken care of... these are the outcome of their marriage system.
For North here wey we they, some people carry this marriage as competition especially our brothers wey no get privilege go school, you go see them they do competition of number of wives they will have.

But even those once wey go school they quick marry because traditionally, you no fit just they say u no they go school and you no marry, na why some guys they marry below 25 years, while our girls they marry very early sometimes at the age of 18 or so, unless those once that go school, na them they fit reach 20-25years range.

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July 12, 2023, 06:37:40 PM
 #10

In the North, as many of them get educated, many more do not get educated like people in the South.

Southerners do not marry and give birth fast again like the Northerners do.

Education is somehow related to this.
And not only education, but technological advancement, high cost of living & the high rate of divorce cases also have a big role to play why many young men & women never marry today, because unlike 2 decades ago when the cost of living was very affordable and you hardly hear cases of divorce, people were hungry to marry at that time, but as time goes on coupled with the introduction of gay and lesbianism, It did killed the interest of the  marriage institution.

But if I'm to speak on behalf of myself, omo, person need to get better money first oh, before Ithinking about marriage oh, because marriage on it's own na load itself wey requires finance, and no be wetin you go into when you never get job, because I dey sure if im to ask una to choose between these 3 house, 99.9% go go for number "C" and not "A", and to get that "C", it requires money, na make boys dey hustle hard this 21st century, so as to live a better life.



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July 12, 2023, 06:45:02 PM
 #11

One of the major setbacks for educated eligible bachelors is lack of finances and economic stability,  because since most of the guys are well educated on the responsibility that accompanied marriage they tend to wait until they are financially stable before thinking of settling down to take family responsibilities but then also we have to take into account the large increase in marriage demands among the uneducated ones because we also notice a trend in the population projections and current realities have uncovered that fact that the issues of marriage among young eligible adults.
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July 13, 2023, 12:12:15 PM
 #12

Well I no belong any groups but I am happily married.

See ehh e get plenty things me wan analyzed here; Marriage is not about money either about fineness or acquiring all things of the world. But marriage is about accepting Responsibility, and also Compatibility, I believe most of you here have came to my wedding and  my Child Dedication and witnessed how it was. I got married when I have settled for less meaning I have came to accept reality that 1 Age is no longer on my side, 2 I know that is my core Duty to father a Child, 3 Someone gives birth to me so I must do so 4 Accepting the responsibility 5 Compatibility (Companionship).

If you understand the meaning of companionship you will marry. Before I was thinking I still had time to spend and flex my life but after I came to draw some analysis about marriage and singlehood I instantaneously changed my mind look for Compatibility when I got it i then say no need to waste time. After which I boiled out to see her parents and every thing began without wasting of time, not that i had Millions or Billions but just managing as others out there.

In summary when you are ready to accept responsibility you will get married not even money that will hold you down because marriage they said is a blessing from God. Proverbs 18:22 "The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the LORD". So do you still need money to marry when God said when you find a wife you find money.
Baba... I trowey cap for you. You hit de nail on de head. Like this emmm I go just print out your write up, laminate am and hang am for my wall so that I go dey read am every day.

I believe single brothers in dis house will take a good step to stand with one girl in a strong relationship that will lead to marriage. And it will be a good thing if Bitcoiners can marry bitcoiners and dey will give birth to wealthy children, but I don't know why some of our guys here are afraid of toasting us than to take us as just a friend in dis forum. Like dat fear fear group, I think we have those guys pretty here, because money is not their problem but dey are afraid to marry a wrong person that will know all their crypto personal details because, as husband and wife you must show your wife or husband every single things you have in d house, and there are some women if you don't show dem, dey will be looking for way to know were all those things is or dey well make d home look like hell to u unless u show dem .
Lol... I go like sidon for dis your mata small. I no say people dey meet and marry for social media like Facebook, Twitter and the likes but e get somethings wey dey attract dem to each other before e get to marriage and first na profile pic. Here, nothing like that abi na signature avatar you want see? I no no how take come to de conclusion say if a bitcoiner marry a fellow bitcoiner dem go give birth to wealthy children. Also, I notice say your talk dey go one side wen you dey yan say weda na fear of disclosing our wallet details na im dey make we no wan marry our fellow bitcoiner. The last time I checked, marriage is all about sharing, so no expect de man to reveal im sensitive wallet information to you wen you neva dey ready to reveal your own. 😎

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July 13, 2023, 12:37:46 PM
 #13

~Snip~
Baba... I trowey cap for you. You hit de nail on de head. Like this emmm I go just print out your write up, laminate am and hang am for my wall so that I go dey read am every day.

Permission granted if you feels that is enough for you to take bold steps then no issues we are together. Marriage is sweet when you have learned to knows the core values of marriage, I believe you get more blessings when you believe in that scripture that takes about marriage.

I am always encouraging young men to start settling down because age waits for nobody and besides if you waiting till 40 years before getting married would help train your children in school if you don't settle now and have your children and use these money we used for flexing and start taking good care of your families.

This where most of our people blamed uncle for not training their children mainwhile their father had the chance to give birth to them earlier, but didn't take bold steps but was late to marry. We need to train our children when we are young and active making money to be able to provide their needs and not when we are old.

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July 13, 2023, 08:29:57 PM
 #14

My papa tell me say for their time, before you reach 25, you done already marry or about to. But today, 30 self never put marriage as priority. Plenty good reasons dey sha o but some their reasons no reason enough to be single at certain age.
Ofcourse our parents married at their early age, and na we be the results of their labour. As for me, I no get time to stay without raising a home on time, because as we de hustle for our daily bread, we suppose de reason marriage join too. The world de advance, everybody want de excess alright before dem marry, this na time wey we no gats puts marriage as priority, no b during the recession of the hard economy of the country. People go marry without anyone forcing them, everybody get priorities dem de pursue, and most people no go marry until dem don achievd their ultimate targets.

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July 15, 2023, 05:02:50 PM
 #15

Me I go speak for myself, firstly I no dey see say marriage as a thing of age, but na wetin person need to ready for and also have a strong financial pillar, person still need to be matured in the mind before getting into marriage because marriage na wetin person go dey inside forever and forever.

So I go advice everyone to be ready for marriage first before getting into it, no Marry because say you don feel say you Don reach the age of marriage or maybe you go marry because your friends dey marry.

Relax and prepare your mind for marriage before you enter inside to avoid divorce...

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July 15, 2023, 06:26:13 PM
 #16

This marriage thing no be wetin dem suppose dey remind somebody so long the person dey make effort, things dey happen and God wey create the world say make all man go multiply and dominate the world. Dem say if something time reach that thing go happen. E just be like seasons wey we get, raining season and dry season, Dem dey happen as their time reach. However, marriage dey very important in our lives, e show maturity of mind that you don dey ready to grow another family but some young people dey do the thing as competition.

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EluguHcman
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July 18, 2023, 01:32:28 AM
Merited by Nwada001 (2)
 #17

Evry man in d beginning wish to marry, even if dem no marry at last or marry late.

4 me I think na d way of life nw dey restructure us the men of hw we tink towards marriage.

Few tins way dey decide for man on marriage na >>>

1) Nature/Time: Nature and time decides for man when to marry according to wen dem fit meet their right person's

2) Money: We believe say we see pepper 4 our parents hands coz money  no dey, no food, no beta skul and not beta houz to sleep.
So we dey wait 4 d moni to com so dat we go fit change d stories

3) Pleasures: We go dey carried away bcos of enjoyments dey feel say time dey til before we know our agenda bcom bygon.

4) Fear: Most of us dey consider if we go marry or not cuz eyes don c plenty shege 4 other people marriages so no want make e happen 2 us b4 we learn. Dat now dey make some men feel say not to marry na prevention better than cures.

5) Boy/Grl Frnd xperiens: Considering the wahala our grl-frnds dey give us just in a temporary relationship dey cuz us pains, heartbreaks & som dey lead us to failure dey make some of us cucuma sign am say if women na like dis den dem no fit go into permanent relationship being marriage cuz da 1 na die.

But 1 tin 4 sure b say who ready to face him worse fear today go face am today and e no go com 2moro 2 face am again.

Determination na key to succeed so decide 1st on wetin u wnt, chase am, catch am no let am go and e go b ur own happily.

Dear men, work hard as u fit, aim to marry early so that u fit get d energy to dey catter 4 ur family welfare. Comot fears way go weigh u down cuz all men supposed marry and no 1 dey minus.

uchegod-21
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July 18, 2023, 12:21:11 PM
 #18

My papa tell me say for their time, before you reach 25, you done already marry or about to. But today, 30 self never put marriage as priority. Plenty good reasons dey sha o but some their reasons no reason enough to be single at certain age.
Maybe in Southern part. Go to North and see the difference. It has been estimated that by 2050, Nigeria population could surpass 1 billion if they continue to reproduce the way they are reproducing and nothing changed till now. More population are coming from the Northern part and they marry fast. Especially their females.

Boss man, their men too dey marry early o...our gateman for Lagos wey I dey show steady love to make sure him feed well already have 3 wives at home. The day I hear the gist, I shock. Him younger brother wey dey follow him squat for the gate man house don already marry two. The gist no gree enter my head but na truth be that.

Some of those guys from the North get different mentality, believe and approach to life. E no easy shaa

R


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August 23, 2023, 10:42:44 AM
 #19

This your post funny shaa I dn laugh tire. But na true talk you yarn. Me I dey advice every naija young man say if you dn hustle get better source of income, go marry. Atleast make you ft dey young dey train your children.
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August 23, 2023, 07:42:11 PM
 #20

Wetin we suppose understand sae marriage no be do or die affair. Whenever peso d ready make em marry. When married to someone, peso supposed to d financially and mentally strong before em go enter the lifetime institution called marriage.

Marriage no be relationship. Once you enter, you don enter am be that. No be wetin peso suppose do mistake for, all because you wan marry early to prove a point and you no come prepare yourself financially and mentally to go into am. As you take enter, if care is not taken, you go fit rush come out of am. By then you fit the regret on the decision wey you make d move to get married at the first place.

Wetin I d try reason be sae, marry when you are ready. No go marry early when you are not financially, emotionally and mentally ready. The economy of the country no be when peso go bring out children just to suffer them. Your life, the future of your children and the peso wey you wan say ''I do to'' need to think properly before you enter the institution called marriage

R


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