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Author Topic: If a addict lives within, which method would you choose to help them  (Read 2351 times)
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March 03, 2024, 11:48:07 AM
 #261

In as much as option 2 wouldn’t work, I think you could improve option 1 to work better. I’m not sure what you mean by not leaving their side for too long but I think that you should talk to the person and know their reason for gambling. You can’t solve a problem without knowing what the problem is. If the person says it’s because they don’t have money, then finding them a job will help them stop gambling because then they have Enough to not have a need to gamble.



 

 

 

 

 

 


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March 03, 2024, 12:23:30 PM
 #262

Sometimes it depends on their behavior because if you see them at their worst, then you need to act quickly without making any introduction anymore since they are not gonna listen to you anymore and this sometimes results in aggression you need to be ready for that. But if you see them slightly addicted and you want them to change, then nicely talk to them to avoid any misunderstanding because if you provoke them more, it will lead to their rebellion, and won't gonna listen to anybody anymore. that's why we have lots of people who ran away from home because of traumatic experiences and also some of them are also at fault since they don't listen to their parents and sibling's advice.
It also depends on the relationship between the gambling addict and you. If you are close friends then it will be easy to tell him that he might be crossing the line on his/her gambling habit.
If you are a parent, either a father or a mother, this is where it gets chaotic. Most of the young ones today see discipline as an act of abuse. This is why I am trying my best to let my kids know that I love them whenever they hear discipline from me. It's best if they will understand that when they are younger so that they will understand it while they are growing up. It's not abuse but mostly love, because as a parent we don't want our kids to walk the wrong path.

Back to the topic. It's better if we talk nicely when we are parents. You are right about that. Maybe that way we can understand what they are going through and maybe that could patch things up and he/she will go back to his normal ways of life, avoiding gambling. As a friend though, it will be different. It's best to tell them the hard truth or tell the parents about what is happening so they will be the ones looking for a solution.
A mix of polite confrontation and unfailing support is my friend recommendation. The key is communicating the painful facts with empathy that fosters introspection rather than resistance. This method creates a secure setting for honest addiction discussions, I've found.

I agree on parenting. Love-based discipline is tricky. Consistent love and discipline teach that advice is protective, not punitive. The key is to establish ideals and boundaries early on and make punishment seem like caring, not coercion.

Differentiating these roles is crucial. Parental speech is authoritative and concerned. Its important to approach these conversations with conscious kindness that encourages openness rather than defiance. Goal? To show mutually respectful ways out of addiction.

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March 03, 2024, 01:25:44 PM
 #263

Addiction is a serious difficult problem that happens when someone loses complete control on a habit they practice practically all the time, some people have it so bad leading them to do crazy things.

Gambling is one of those habits that people tend to fall into its addiction due to their irresponsibility and impulsive actions. When someone gets addicted to Gambling you can say that he will no longer have a stable healthy life,  not to mention going eventually broke because of the consecutive amounts of money that are spent daily on bets, losing so much money and not being able to stop what you are doing could push you go insane, some people even loan loads of money just to satisfy their gambling addiction needs and they ofcourse end up in big debts they can't pay back.

So imagine someone from your family or loved ones going through what I mentioned above, seeing someone you care about struggle due to gambling addiction, I don't thing treating them in a harsh way could help, it will only make it worse on them it's like adding more pressure and struggle on them. It is preferable to have calm conversations with them trying to understand them and help them fight this addiction, you should always be beside them to make sure they're away of anything related to Gambling. I think if you try the harsh way it won't help because you're gonna push this person away creating a distance between you two that will push him to even hide things from you just to avoid that harsh reaction.

That's why it is important to build a strong healthy relationship between family members for them to feel comfortable sharing their lives and opening up about their problems, violence and hard ways were never a solution.

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March 03, 2024, 01:50:47 PM
Last edit: March 03, 2024, 02:07:02 PM by Accardo
 #264

Addiction affects the brain and removes a lot of happy moments from the person's memory, if he's remembered of those past, he'd have lots of things to think about when alone. In a condition where the gambler has no funds to afford a therapist, the best option is inviting a relative over, or convincing the gambler to visit one. Those people help us a lot when in problem gambling. Their time and conversations put the brain quite busy enough to forget about whatever affects us in our daily life. An addict's worse moment is his lonely times. Keeping the person's brain active on other events puts the person in a position where he sees other aspects of life, other than gambling.
I think that there are no clear rules that will help an addicted gambler. If you constantly shout at the player, he will take away from you his gambling world in which you will not disturb him and there he will satisfy his stress hunger. On the other hand, if we behave calmly and are not critical of the addict’s game, then he will play without hindrance. I think that everyone needs to choose an individual plan to reduce the desire to play in such players. In fact, this is very difficult, because you need to know the characteristics of his character, which can only be fully studied for more than one year and then you will not learn everything you need. And even if you choose one of these options and everything goes well and the player stops playing, at one point in a year or several years he may return to this due to any stress in life. This could be a quarrel at work, breaking up with your girlfriend, or the loss of a loved one.
On the time that someone do really get that offended then for sure he/she would definitely be that going or trying out to keep some distance specially if it turns out that he do felt that he/she's being pressured or something. We cant really be able to stop things accordingly because if we do speak about gambling addiction then this one really pertains on someones self decisions in regarding
into the conditions that you are into. It is really just that gambling addicts wont really be able to able to realize those mistakes on the time that they would really be on such condition,
which we know that other people could really be able to see upon.

This is why if one of your family members or close to you that would be getting addicted then you would really be having that hard time on trying out to realize on what you are currently doing.
Im aint saying that it would be that able to solved out such problem but of course its not something that you could really be able to easily quit if you
dont have that strong self discipline and control.

Healing an addict is more like a teamwork, between the addict and his friend or therapist. It's not a simple task as you mentioned, but if a step is taken the person can be better compared to when nothing is done. Friends or relatives may feel nothing can be done about the problem, thereby increasing the problem of the addict. The process takes lots of time for the addict to be healed, main reason most people withdraw from helping out the person, and he needs to comply by providing information regarding his actions and how it affects him.

Whether he's doing illicit things to generate money for his gambling habit or wagering all his earned money in gambling. Once, he's able to provide the right information the therapist will then be able to decide where to begin with recuperating the person's brain. Healing an addict, can't be achieved if he's not willing to share his pains with his relatives or therapists. Trying to help him without any background check on him is a waste of time.

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March 03, 2024, 02:06:39 PM
 #265

 It is not easy to convert or influence that person back to the normal human life again. Counseling a gambling addict is not something one can do once and it will be a continues counseling everyday. There are two approach parents normally used on those guys. Either in arsh way or in polite way. But the arsh work more than the polite way. Because the parents used polite approach in most cases they would be thinking that the parents are begging them so they would be very pride of it. And even the polite way there two approaches. Either military drilling or personal drilling. And children are afraid of military drilling so it is easier for them to stop gambling. But some gamblers listen to their parents so once they told them to stop they stopped it at once.
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March 03, 2024, 02:18:07 PM
 #266

Which do you think it's best? Some people do think that been soft and gentle will be more effective and some people think that been harder on them is the real love here, they need to make them stop by force.
 
What do you think?
Each person is a biopsychosocial individual, with personal subjective characteristics which can't be compared to each other as it was a cake recipe. The best working method for one person might not be the best method for another person, so you have to analyze each case particularly and closely. Nowadays everyone on the internet have the solutions for every problems humanity faces, judging from the comfort of their houses, however on practice things happen differently.

Only the family or the therapist who is close to the addict individual in a daily basis will be able to draw an accurate scenario of what is happening and what approaches could be more efficient. Moreover, it's not just a matter of best working method, that is, to be harsher or softer. The main key point is the addict individual wishing to change his life for the better and to finally overcome the addiction. If this person doesn't want treatment and doesn't see the importance of it, you can be soft, harsh or warm that it won't make any differences at all...

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March 04, 2024, 11:07:51 AM
 #267

I see your point and that's valid if we are too close with the person and we also understand how they will react with the way we will talk to them, though it will be a different take when we deal with someone who's already deeply addicted to gambling, there's no way that they will take time to listen, as everything that inside their minds is all about gambling and how they will going to please their desire to keep betting, unless you really have that bond which might break that engagement and they will spare time to sit and talk about their gambling participation.

More on how powerful your words and how you may inspire them with your statement, but yes, it's good to say that bringing good conversation and placing some engaging topics about their gambling may gain their interest and might help them to realize how far are they in terms of gambling addiction and what are the things that they already abuse.
Those who have experienced a serious gambling addiction will not want to listen to advice from other people even though it is for their own good. They will continue their gambling activities and not think they are addicted to gambling.
However, we still have to try and must not give up, especially if the person who is addicted to gambling is one of our family members. We have to help them and get them out of their gambling addiction. If not, we will have bigger problems because people who are addicted to gambling might get other, bigger problems.
We must try to have a good conversation with those who are addicted to gambling so that they can accept the reality of what is happening to them. By inviting them to discuss this, we hope to open themselves and their eyes to see this reality so that they can begin to be aware of their gambling addiction.

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March 04, 2024, 12:06:06 PM
 #268

Addiction is a serious difficult problem that happens when someone loses complete control on a habit they practice practically all the time, some people have it so bad leading them to do crazy things.

Gambling is one of those habits that people tend to fall into its addiction due to their irresponsibility and impulsive actions. When someone gets addicted to Gambling you can say that he will no longer have a stable healthy life,  not to mention going eventually broke because of the consecutive amounts of money that are spent daily on bets, losing so much money and not being able to stop what you are doing could push you go insane, some people even loan loads of money just to satisfy their gambling addiction needs and they ofcourse end up in big debts they can't pay back.

So imagine someone from your family or loved ones going through what I mentioned above, seeing someone you care about struggle due to gambling addiction, I don't thing treating them in a harsh way could help, it will only make it worse on them it's like adding more pressure and struggle on them. It is preferable to have calm conversations with them trying to understand them and help them fight this addiction, you should always be beside them to make sure they're away of anything related to Gambling. I think if you try the harsh way it won't help because you're gonna push this person away creating a distance between you two that will push him to even hide things from you just to avoid that harsh reaction.

That's why it is important to build a strong healthy relationship between family members for them to feel comfortable sharing their lives and opening up about their problems, violence and hard ways were never a solution.
Complicated brain chemistry, emotional anguish, and poor decision-making make gambling addiction more than merely losing control. Vilifying or abandoning an addict worsens their condition. Support requires proactiveness, not simply presence. Understanding addiction triggers and psychology is key. The goal is to create an environment that supports healthy choices and addresses the root causes, not just "avoid gambling"

We should discuss healthy gambling. True or not, it exists. Setting limits, recognizing odds, and never letting it devour more than spare change is key. Responsibility, education, and self-control matter

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March 04, 2024, 02:05:04 PM
 #269

I see your point and that's valid if we are too close with the person and we also understand how they will react with the way we will talk to them, though it will be a different take when we deal with someone who's already deeply addicted to gambling, there's no way that they will take time to listen, as everything that inside their minds is all about gambling and how they will going to please their desire to keep betting, unless you really have that bond which might break that engagement and they will spare time to sit and talk about their gambling participation.

More on how powerful your words and how you may inspire them with your statement, but yes, it's good to say that bringing good conversation and placing some engaging topics about their gambling may gain their interest and might help them to realize how far are they in terms of gambling addiction and what are the things that they already abuse.
Those who have experienced a serious gambling addiction will not want to listen to advice from other people even though it is for their own good. They will continue their gambling activities and not think they are addicted to gambling.
However, we still have to try and must not give up, especially if the person who is addicted to gambling is one of our family members. We have to help them and get them out of their gambling addiction. If not, we will have bigger problems because people who are addicted to gambling might get other, bigger problems.
We must try to have a good conversation with those who are addicted to gambling so that they can accept the reality of what is happening to them. By inviting them to discuss this, we hope to open themselves and their eyes to see this reality so that they can begin to be aware of their gambling addiction.
I know your struggle is real. Family gambling addiction treatment needs patience, perseverance, and empathy. I've witnessed it. The secret? Communication, but its easier said than done. Yes, they may first ignore you. They may not acknowledge an issue. Addiction is like that. Be gentle but firm. Discuss their feelings and experiences, not simply gambling. Human connection comes first. Remember, it's process. Small, sustained efforts can lead to breakthroughs.

Also consider professional aid. Gambling addiction therapists and support groups exist. They provide help and strategies you may not be able to deliver. Its improving your support, not giving up.

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March 05, 2024, 06:35:40 AM
 #270

I know your struggle is real. Family gambling addiction treatment needs patience, perseverance, and empathy. I've witnessed it. The secret? Communication, but its easier said than done. Yes, they may first ignore you. They may not acknowledge an issue. Addiction is like that. Be gentle but firm. Discuss their feelings and experiences, not simply gambling. Human connection comes first. Remember, it's process. Small, sustained efforts can lead to breakthroughs.

Also consider professional aid. Gambling addiction therapists and support groups exist. They provide help and strategies you may not be able to deliver. Its improving your support, not giving up.
Yes, you are right to mention communication. But we know it will never be easy to communicate with someone who is addicted to gambling.
They will not easily listen to other people's suggestions or words because they have closed their eyes and ears and think they are right. But we must not ignore them because they are one of our family members who we must look after and help if they are experiencing difficulties.
Gambling addiction is really difficult for everyone, but we have to be sure that we will definitely be given a way to help family members who are experiencing difficulties. If we really have difficulty dealing with gambling addicts, we can ask for help from other people, in this case, professional help, as you said. After all, those who are addicted to gambling are our family members who we must help.

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March 05, 2024, 06:48:39 AM
 #271


 
What do you think?
most gamblers are not kids you sweet talk into stoping an addictive behaviour whenever they become addicted into gambling or try to become tough towards them as a remedy to curing Thier addictive behaviour. Most addict don't even know that they've become addicted to an act and before it becomes obvious in Thier eyes it must have eaten deep into Thier vains amd in most cases they are the ones that can easily liberate themselves off Thier addictive lifestyle.

It's good to attempt bringing them out of Thier addiction through whatever strategy you have thought of but the reality is that at the end of the day they are always the ones in yy best position to liberating themselves off Thier current situation. Although engaging them in conversation that guides them into reducing Thier rate of gambling could help but if you're trying to be tough on them, they will just like at you as someone who wouldn't understand what they are going through and might probably not open up how tough what they are facing is really disturbing them.

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March 05, 2024, 07:36:53 AM
 #272

In as much as option 2 wouldn’t work, I think you could improve option 1 to work better.
same as what I am thinking and we can conjoin those 2 for better outcome.
Quote
I’m not sure what you mean by not leaving their side for too long but I think that you should talk to the person and know their reason for gambling.
Maybe he means to never stay with them longer because they will find comfort from us.
Quote
You can’t solve a problem without knowing what the problem is.
The problem is addiction and that is the only reason why we are talking here.
Quote
If the person says it’s because they don’t have money, then finding them a job will help them stop gambling because then they have Enough to not have a need to gamble.
the problem with addict people is that they don't want to look for regular job instead easy money in gambling.

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March 05, 2024, 08:21:25 AM
 #273

but I think that you should talk to the person and know their reason for gambling. You can’t solve a problem without knowing what the problem is. If the person says it’s because they don’t have money, then finding them a job will help them stop gambling because then they have Enough to not have a need to gamble.
I believe some people fall into addiction because they don't have money, or want to make easy money quickly as mentioned above. If he's already addicted, it would be difficult to solve it simply by giving them money or jobs. I'm pretty sure you've heard a story where a successful businessman falls into bankruptcy because he keeps gambling, or somebody falls into gambling debt even though he has a decent job because he can't stop gambling, etc. Even if he is not yet an addict, you'd need to change the environment to be as restrictive as possible to prevent him builds another habit of doing his gambling activity every day. Basically, whether the strategy will be effective will depend on each person.

the problem with addict people is that they don't want to look for regular job instead easy money in gambling.
While this is true for some people, not everyone fees into that category. Problem gamblers or people with addiction can be self-aware about it and try to find a solution but fail to work on it for various reasons. There is a reason why any addiction help sometimes refers to the reader as people with the addiction itself. I've also heard many stories on social media from people telling their experiences with various addictions from gambling to porn. It is a good thing if we don't generalize them and call them lazy just because some of them are like that. CMIIW.

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March 05, 2024, 08:31:17 AM
 #274

If an addict lives with me, I would make him a bet he cant fulfil or win Cheesy I will try to trick him with "I bet you will able not to gamble for half a year" (actually any long period would do, but the longer the better). Will announce a solid price and wait to see how he will try to self cure. This might sound silly, but I think this might be helpful and do the trick. And I will repeat that few times. The effect will be unnoticeable from first glance, but it will at least train that person for self control.

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March 05, 2024, 08:59:47 AM
 #275

If an addict lives with me, I would make him a bet he cant fulfil or win Cheesy I will try to trick him with "I bet you will able not to gamble for half a year" (actually any long period would do, but the longer the better). Will announce a solid price and wait to see how he will try to self cure. This might sound silly, but I think this might be helpful and do the trick. And I will repeat that few times. The effect will be unnoticeable from first glance, but it will at least train that person for self control.

To me this is not silly at all although an addicted person will never agree to 6 months without gambling even if the price is huge if he can fulfill this promise.I think a more realistic approach would be starting with 2 weeks or something along these lines which is more doable even for an avid gambler.Even this short amount of time can help achieve some sort of self control to the addicted person,of course is not going to help since the first try but the more tries the more patience gained.

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March 05, 2024, 09:06:18 AM
 #276

There are a lot of options you can do but not this. Forcing a person to quit gambling where they are addicted will never make you achieve the goal of stopping them. There should be the right process to conduct to make them stop without forcing them. The right thing to do is to help them by making them realize the important things they need to do or prioritize instead of spending all their time being addicted to gambling. Forcing them will only make them think to spend more time gambling and make them more addicted than their current situation until they are no longer able to help.

i also think that forcing someone not to gamble is the same as making them even angrier and will actually fight us. the approach taken should be with understanding and empathy, where we should be able to advise them face to face. if they still resist in the process, give him more advice and don't allow him to gamble more than he can afford. because stones that are dripped with water will also change shape, like people who are addicted, if we continue to give advice and empathize with them, maybe it will help them to soften and reduce the intensity of their gambling.
It should come as no surprise that forcing someone to stop gambling against their will can backfire, resulting in increased frustration and resentment. Taking the time to speak with them face to face and offer advise and support is far more likely to have a positive impact. And an analogy of the stone being shaped by water over time is extremely powerful; it implies that change is possible, but it requires patience and persistence.
An introverted lifestyle shows a less communicative personality and even if we talk more to them, the story is just our presentation, it does not condense any other thoughts for them when they are just an emotional trash can and only know how to listen to a story and experience advice, they are not connected by such stories, their world is too special and prevents anyone from entering. Helping them can only lead them to experience the outside world more, like they need to find the rope to overcome difficult emotions inside without needing others to give them a clear path.
How is introvert the problem? Because I am, and I take advises very serious, especially about my well being and the decisions that I am about to make, been introvert doesn't mean we are all stone-cold at heart, as if we don't listen to people, that's a big lie about introverts.

Less communications doesn't mean we don't take advice, we are all different, even those who talks a lot still don't follow all advises, we all have the right to choose from the advice we are given and leave the rest.

Also, not all advises are good, you are the one to make your pick out of all the advices you are given, I will like to ask, is all advice a good one? I believe the answer is a no, either extrovert or introvert it's wiser to use your own brain and not just go with all the advice that people give you.
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March 05, 2024, 09:12:24 AM
 #277

If an addict lives with me, I would make him a bet he cant fulfil or win Cheesy I will try to trick him with "I bet you will able not to gamble for half a year" (actually any long period would do, but the longer the better). Will announce a solid price and wait to see how he will try to self cure. This might sound silly, but I think this might be helpful and do the trick. And I will repeat that few times. The effect will be unnoticeable from first glance, but it will at least train that person for self control.
you're absolutely right,if an addict lives within first I will advice him never to gamble anymore, that if only him can stop this gambling I promise to provide all his need. though when someone is addicted to gambling they find it so difficult to withdraw from it, reason been that  whenever time they remember the money they lost ever since they started gambling till date,I think they can use the money to establish a very big business, considering all this lost they won't have the remise to change either.

To me this is not silly at all although an addicted person will never agree to 6 months without gambling even if the price is huge if he can fulfill this promise.I think a more realistic approach would be starting with 2 weeks or something along these lines which is more doable even for an avid gambler.Even this short amount of time can help achieve some sort of self control to the addicted person,of course is not going to help since the first try but the more tries the more patience gained.

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March 05, 2024, 09:49:41 AM
 #278

If an addict lives with me, I would make him a bet he cant fulfil or win Cheesy I will try to trick him with "I bet you will able not to gamble for half a year" (actually any long period would do, but the longer the better). Will announce a solid price and wait to see how he will try to self cure. This might sound silly, but I think this might be helpful and do the trick. And I will repeat that few times. The effect will be unnoticeable from first glance, but it will at least train that person for self control.

To me this is not silly at all although an addicted person will never agree to 6 months without gambling even if the price is huge if he can fulfill this promise.I think a more realistic approach would be starting with 2 weeks or something along these lines which is more doable even for an avid gambler.Even this short amount of time can help achieve some sort of self control to the addicted person,of course is not going to help since the first try but the more tries the more patience gained.
This seems like a good idea to try and implement if you live with a gambling addict. But I also agree that it's too long and I don't think they would be able to agree to do it, because their urge to gamble every day would be stronger. I would probably start with a month first, I don't think that's a long time, nor is it a short time, although it might be a very long time in their mind. But I'm also sure they'll steal the time when they're not with us, because we can't be with them 24/7, right?
Apart from this, I also have other approaches such as showing them someone who was ruined by gambling. I'm sure they will also be evasive with this approach, including denying that they are an addict. But on the other hand I'm sure it will slowly enter into their thinking, yes they might be a little disturbed by the image of a person ruined by gambling. I try to play with their psychology, although the risk at the beginning is that they might think we are judging them about their gambling activities.

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March 05, 2024, 10:13:43 AM
 #279

It is not easy to cure gambling addiction, especially since he is a member of our family. But the most important thing is don't give up easily and don't walk away, don't be hated. However, we should show the same love and affection as we treat other family members, gather together to joke and laugh together, and invite them to go for a walk or see something positive and inspiring.
And the most important thing is to invite him to positive things, especially getting closer to God. And there is the right time and moment to be invited to talk face to face with heart, seriousness and also a little firmness.
Actually, it is not the addict who needs professional help, but rather us or all family members to find the best way with the help of people we consider reliable and who provide good advice to help us in the healing process.

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March 05, 2024, 12:23:07 PM
 #280

As a member of a family and there is a gambling addict within, which method do you think it's the best to rip off the addict from your family member?

Which do you think it's best? Some people do think that been soft and gentle will be more effective and some people think that been harder on them is the real love here, they need to make them stop by force.
 
What do you think?

All possible comfort is the best, even if we say that they decide to play gambling and they are willing to let go of this kind of habit there's nothing wrong with supporting them and seeking other ways to let them change their perspective in life that is not just only circulating in the gambling.  Theres is nothing wrong with gambling but excessive playing is too much. If you can handle them good but if you cannot there's nothing wrong seeking a medical assistance to professionals, so they can give a suggestions, medicine if needed and therapy of course.

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