People keep asking me to borrow money, some of them for betting

[CODE200]

~snip~

Usually, small lies are enough to be able to repel these pesky borrowers because you know that they're going to take notice of the hint that you don't want to lend them money, it will also work where you tell them when will they pay the loan and then tell them, direct to the point that it's going to be a difficult time for them if they don't make true of their promise, this too works like a charm especially for those people that are close to you to some level, the trust that's also a part of the loan is going to be broken, I'd still go with lying to avoid borrowerd, much easier for me and to them, no long winded speech about trust and loans.

Small lies can helps us to avoids people who wants to borrow money from us because they will not thinks that we lies to them. But for those who knows us better will thinks that we lies to them. We just don't wants to see they playing gambling, especially if we knows that they can't control themselves better and only lose that money and makes them difficult to repay the money. They should know that we don't wants to lend our money to them and will not force us doing that. They can search for the other people who wants to lend and we guess that they can gets it easily so they can do many things with that money.

It is difficult to lend the money to people who can't keeps their promises to repay the money. Many people ruins their relationship doing this simple matter so we don't wants to get that experience.

I'm not that kind of person, when it comes to gambling, I'm not lending to those people because I'm concerned of their habit but because I'm not good at confrontation and straight answers and I really don't want to lend them the money, maybe that's the part that we are different and those people that knows me best, if they know that I'm lying to them about something just to get away with letting them borrow some money for gambling, they'd know by then that I'm not going to lend any to them. Regarding promises, I think that if they start to break it, that's the point that I draw the line, they might be able to still pay it back but they can never borrow money from me again.

[maydna]

~snip~

with those who are addicted to gambling and when they have run out of money they can borrow money by lying, the reason is that they definitely won't say they borrowed the money to use it for gambling, because of course they will say another reason, this is something you have to pay attention to. When we have a friend who is addicted to gambling, don't easily lend him money because it can be used for gambling. It's not that we don't want to help, but we have to be able to see what we are helping him with. It is necessary to consider it because to prevent losses, even if we only lend money but don't gamble, losses can occur because by lending money to addicts, let's just say the money lent is lost. there is very little chance of it coming back.
If you lend it for other things that are in your life's interests, such as meeting your needs, then there is no harm in helping and indeed the act of lending money with the aim of meeting your daily needs is not wrong. and it's true that they could come up with various reasons to be able to get a loan to use for gambling again.

If they already lied to people and lose that money in gambling, they will do the same thing to other people because they will not stops from gambling easily. They thinks that they can borrow money from other people because they already knows many people that they can borrow the money. That is an usual way that they always do and becomes their habits to have money from borrows money from other people.

If we sees people like this, we can gives many explanation or reason that we don't wants to lend them the money. We can says something to them or we can also lies to them and that is okay because we needs that money to fills our daily needs. We can not just gives that money to them, especially if we have many needs that we have to fills and if we have family, we must gives that money first to our family.

~snip~

I'm not that kind of person, when it comes to gambling, I'm not lending to those people because I'm concerned of their habit but because I'm not good at confrontation and straight answers and I really don't want to lend them the money, maybe that's the part that we are different and those people that knows me best, if they know that I'm lying to them about something just to get away with letting them borrow some money for gambling, they'd know by then that I'm not going to lend any to them. Regarding promises, I think that if they start to break it, that's the point that I draw the line, they might be able to still pay it back but they can never borrow money from me again.

That is good for you because you knows what you must do for those people who wants to use the borrow money for playing gambling. We don't wants to gets trouble from them who can not pay the money to us so we can stay away from them and say many things so they can accepts that we don't wants to lend them the money. They will asks the money and use many reasons but they will not say the truth that they will use the money to playing gambling because those people knows that we don't wants to gives the money if those people says they wants to playing gambling.

They will not keeps their promise to gives back the money to us because when they lose the money, they will not have any money and will difficult to repay us. So we must be careful with them and not lend money to them.

[Zackz5000]

As a gambler you dont need to be so addicted to in it to an extend that will be making you to borrow money in other to gamble because it will really spoil your life because you can't be able to do any meaningful thing with your life. And when ever they run out cash they can tell all lie just in other to get help from you by lending the some money unknowing to you the money is for gambling. For I will advise you Op, when giving out money to people inform of borrowing it out you should know the kind of people you lend money to because some may not pay back because they don't have any means of paying back, they always hope on the money in there betting slip at the end they will loss because the money you put into gambling is not yet sure that It will play or not so when giving out loan give to those that have something good doing knowing they have every means of paying you back before you will go bankrupt trying to help everyone out.

[EarnOnVictor]

Some people even go so far as to ask me to borrow money for what? to bet!! What a joke. I answer briefly and bluntly that I don't have the money to lend for these purposes!

And the worst thing is that they ask me for small amounts, like $2, 5, 10$... I think that if the person doesn't have that money now, the chances of them getting that money to pay you are low. If the person is in need, it's easier for them to confess right away to see what I can do, because I'm not a bad person.

Do you usually lend money to relatives, friends, etc.? Have you ever felt bad about it, done it unwillingly?

And when they are female friends, do you lend them?

If your friends are asking you to borrow them like $2 or $5, then you should know you want to do a free gift. Many of them may not pay it back and you will surely forget it later if you are blessed with enough. But first, on judging all that you've narrated, what I can say here is that you might not be keeping the right circle of friends, so if you are a comfortable person among many of them who are not comfortable, it is still an issue and there is no way you will not continue to feel their burden and disturbance on you.

This is why it is good to keep the right circle of friends so that none of you will depend on the other for anything, and if at all some are facing one or two challenges, you will surely understand and help. But not in a situation where the friend appears irresponsible always. You can imagine the person who borrowed money from you but was unable to return it as and when due and those ones who are likely to bet with the money borrowed. These are irresponsible friends, to say the least.

Also, yes, I've lent my relative money and it was a big amount of money and was paid even before the stipulated time. This is what we call trust and a responsible act, and I assess very well before I lend my money out as some will not return it back. This has happened to them many times in the past but I've already cut off such a circle of friend. As for female friends, I like to avoid them in this context but give them a bit I can let go of. Should in case she insists and she is responsible at the same time, why not?

For someone whose really that addicted with gambling then it would really be that impossible that you would really be asking or tending to ask about such amount but if you do make out those kind of refuse or
trying out to tell them that you dont have money but you do have an intent on giving about $3-5 then it would really be just your choice on which its really that true that these people wont really be able to repay you up if ever they would really be that tending to let them borrow specially if someone whose really that get involved with gambling then it would really be not shocking that they will really be not prioritizing on the amounts that they have borrowed someone that they do know. Not all though since there are persons who are mindful with their loans but majority would really be something like this.

If you are someone who do have the money then it would really be just that depending on you but if you are someone who do have  that budget then it would really be that significant that you would really be that trying out to control things according into the money that you've been holding or specifically will really be not making those kind of decisions since you do know that it is something
you do need rather.

Well said, but for me, there is still a limit to my generosity when I fully know that the person(s) are not responsible and would definitely use that money to bet. And if the betting has not been positive to their lives despite betting for long years, why then waste my hard-earned money on them to use it to bet? I can take them for a treat and pay their bills, that's better, and if they like, they should go and bet with what I bought for them...lol But giving them money all the time no matter how little the money is, I will not be doing that. If they are responsible and I am sure that they will use the money for good purposes, why not? I will give them.

I might even give them more, and that's even if I claim I borrowed them in pretence knowing fully well that they might not give me the money back due to their financial challenges. I will still do that, that is me, but my money must be used for a just cause. Now, for someone that I know will always use my money to bet and lose it? I will not dare that having done it a time or two, I will stop finally because I prefer to lose my hard-earned money by myself instead of someone collecting it cheaply from me and losing it as if he doesn't care.

I care about my money mehn! I worked for it.

[Ruttoshi]

~snip~

Usually, small lies are enough to be able to repel these pesky borrowers because you know that they're going to take notice of the hint that you don't want to lend them money, it will also work where you tell them when will they pay the loan and then tell them, direct to the point that it's going to be a difficult time for them if they don't make true of their promise, this too works like a charm especially for those people that are close to you to some level, the trust that's also a part of the loan is going to be broken, I'd still go with lying to avoid borrowerd, much easier for me and to them, no long winded speech about trust and loans.

Small lies can helps us to avoids people who wants to borrow money from us because they will not thinks that we lies to them. But for those who knows us better will thinks that we lies to them. We just don't wants to see they playing gambling, especially if we knows that they can't control themselves better and only lose that money and makes them difficult to repay the money. They should know that we don't wants to lend our money to them and will not force us doing that. They can search for the other people who wants to lend and we guess that they can gets it easily so they can do many things with that money.

It is difficult to lend the money to people who can't keeps their promises to repay the money. Many people ruins their relationship doing this simple matter so we don't wants to get that experience.

I'm not that kind of person, when it comes to gambling, I'm not lending to those people because I'm concerned of their habit but because I'm not good at confrontation and straight answers and I really don't want to lend them the money, maybe that's the part that we are different and those people that knows me best, if they know that I'm lying to them about something just to get away with letting them borrow some money for gambling, they'd know by then that I'm not going to lend any to them. Regarding promises, I think that if they start to break it, that's the point that I draw the line, they might be able to still pay it back but they can never borrow money from me again.

Way back, I use to borrow my friend money to gamble while I watch him gamble, and sometimes he wins instantly and give me back the money, while sometimes he run at loss and promise to pay me back later. Sometimes he pays back but most times he doesn't pay back.

This made me to conclude that I will never borrow any gambler money to gamble. One funny thing is that they know how to lie very well in order for you to feel pity for them on a different story. What I do is that I just tell them that I don't have any money on me, because they are not in my budget for the day.

[swogerino]

I think the best way is to not lend money here and there.I know that people who lend money are generally good hearted and a bit more trustworthy than they should.In our time the level of not so loyal and trustworthy persons have increased insanely because of the problems we have most likely from the world economy not being in a great shape,the best thing to do is to stop lending money to "friends" from college and limit lending to only people who are close relatives which we know well and we know that most likely we will have not any difficulty to get the money back.We are living in difficult times.

[shasan]

I think when you have no idle money you should not make any buy/sell or should not take any loan. If you take a loan and you make it lost then you will not be able to repay the loan as a result you will loss both yourself and your relatives/friends who gave you the loan.

[Forsyth Jones]

I think the best way is to not lend money here and there.I know that people who lend money are generally good hearted and a bit more trustworthy than they should.In our time the level of not so loyal and trustworthy persons have increased insanely because of the problems we have most likely from the world economy not being in a great shape,the best thing to do is to stop lending money to "friends" from college and limit lending to only people who are close relatives which we know well and we know that most likely we will have not any difficulty to get the money back.We are living in difficult times.

These same people take advantage of our goodwill, asking for relatively small amounts of money is part of their strategy, because if it's a close friend or relative, the chances of people saying NO are very small and of charging borrowed amounts of $5 or any amount insignificant and so on are even smaller.

I think when you have no idle money you should not make any buy/sell or should not take any loan. If you take a loan and you make it lost then you will not be able to repay the loan as a result you will loss both yourself and your relatives/friends who gave you the loan.

I know the economic situation is difficult, but there are people who use this as an advantage to default on others, and generally there are those addicted to gambling, they don't care if you need the money you lent later.

[ololajulo]

As long as I know the money is for betting i wont give it

[Orpichukwu]

As a gambler you dont need to be so addicted to in it to an extend that will be making you to borrow money in other to gamble because it will really spoil your life because you can't be able to do any meaningful thing with your life.

This is very true. Once a gambler gets to the stage where they can no longer control their own gambling amounts and which money is not supposed to be used for gambling, that stage is very difficult for them to even remember their family.
 
All they care for is how to fulfill their gambling desires, and everything else means nothing to them. Once you see such a type of gambler, al they need is help to get them off that stage, even if it will take sending them to a rehabilitation centre for them to be free from punishing themselves.

[lienfaye]

As long as I know the money is for betting i wont give it

Because chances are, it will only be wasted for spending in gambling. Don't lend money to someone and will be use to gamble, as well as don't borrow for gambling purposes.

If you want to play then use your own money, if you don't have any then refrain from playing because it's in the rule to only use what you can afford to lose. Playing with a loan money will only put yourself into a deep problem.

[Hazink]

As long as I know the money is for betting i wont give it

You will not know because they will not tell you; they will always come up with excuses that will convince you to give them that money, or they can even boldly tell you that they want to gamble with it, not that they don’t have the money but that they don’t have access to it for the main reason that you should lend them the money later in the day and they will send it back to you. Things like that do occur.

[AliMan]

It has become increasingly common for friends and not-so-close "friends" to come and ask me to borrow money. I don't usually ask for the purpose, but some ask me because of betting at online houses.

The last time I lent money to a colleague, who I hadn't had much contact with other than at work for a short period, it was with great difficulty that I got the money back.

I don't know where people get the amount of money they think I have, they must think I look like a bank...

Who likes having to borrow money? Unless you are a loan shark and lend with collateral where the risk is almost zero, why lend money where you end up with a loss? 'cause in addition to no one paying you with interest, most never pay you on time, at least you will get your money back after repeated charges.

Some people even go so far as to ask me to borrow money for what? to bet!! What a joke. I answer briefly and bluntly that I don't have the money to lend for these purposes!

And the worst thing is that they ask me for small amounts, like $2, 5, 10$... I think that if the person doesn't have that money now, the chances of them getting that money to pay you are low. If the person is in need, it's easier for them to confess right away to see what I can do, because I'm not a bad person.

Do you usually lend money to relatives, friends, etc.? Have you ever felt bad about it, done it unwillingly?

And when they are female friends, do you lend them?

I do lend money for relatives and friends but only for emergencies like health reasons and for food allowances. Sometimes other reasons isn't valid, other people who's close to me always made that reason as an excuse and alibi's. That's really the worst case if they just lie about money, because their addiction came to a point that it really became uncontrollable in which having many false stories just to lend money due to gambling problems.

[DaNNy001]

As a gambler you dont need to be so addicted to in it to an extend that will be making you to borrow money in other to gamble because it will really spoil your life because you can't be able to do any meaningful thing with your life.

This is very true. Once a gambler gets to the stage where they can no longer control their own gambling amounts and which money is not supposed to be used for gambling, that stage is very difficult for them to even remember their family.
 
All they care for is how to fulfill their gambling desires, and everything else means nothing to them. Once you see such a type of gambler, al they need is help to get them off that stage, even if it will take sending them to a rehabilitation centre for them to be free from punishing themselves.

The thing is that such gamblers tend to be at denial to themselves and also to others around them, they tend to always live in this wild dream that at every try is another opportunity for them to actually get what they are fighting for, which unknowning to such type of gamblers, they are probably just digging the hole to their death alot more. If there is any way to help out such person then it would probably be the intensive care in rehab because even your simple advice can't really get their thinking back into the right order.

[ololajulo]

As long as I know the money is for betting i wont give it

You will not know because they will not tell you; they will always come up with excuses that will convince you to give them that money, or they can even boldly tell you that they want to gamble with it, not that they don’t have the money but that they don’t have access to it for the main reason that you should lend them the money later in the day and they will send it back to you. Things like that do occur.

When a gambler tells you he's borrowing money to gamble, he's implicitly warning you that if he loses, repaying the loan might be difficult, and you could end up sharing the loss. As someone with my mindset, I should be cautious and well-informed in such situations.

[Sandra_hakeem]

The last time I lent money to a colleague, who I hadn't had much contact with other than at work for a short period, it was with great difficulty that I got the money back.

How do you keep lending out money to people when you've had experiences like this already? Aren't you supposed to learn from the tree? I'd be damned that your inexperience exposed you to certain type of people that don't just wanna pay back when they borrow from you... but that's not even the case.

Never lend out your funds to someone that just wanna wager them; gambling isn't a form of investment that regenerates interest...You'll either lose everything to the game or nothing else. If you're into a lending business with your folks, always try to understand why they need it.

[Dewi Aries]

You will not know because they will not tell you; they will always come up with excuses that will convince you to give them that money, or they can even boldly tell you that they want to gamble with it, not that they don’t have the money but that they don’t have access to it for the main reason that you should lend them the money later in the day and they will send it back to you. Things like that do occur.

When a gambler tells you he's borrowing money to gamble, he's implicitly warning you that if he loses, repaying the loan might be difficult, and you could end up sharing the loss. As someone with my mindset, I should be cautious and well-informed in such situations.

Yes but I think it is very unlikely that they would tell a borrower that the money would be used for gambling, because in general people are usually reluctant to lend money to gamblers even if they are gamblers who have good responsibility in their gambling activities or in the sense that they are gamblers who can maintain and control themselves well. This is because there have been quite a few cases that have occurred that it is really difficult for a gambler to be accountable for the decisions he has made such as borrowing money which in the end usually means that they run away from responsibility.

And maybe this is the reason why gamblers are usually secretive about what the money they borrow is for, usually they lie and say that the money will be used for something else which can also be a plan or scenario that looks desperate so that a borrower feels sorry for them and gives them a loan. This means that I think it is quite difficult to really identify what the money is being used for, unless the person is a very close friend of yours who you usually know about their habits.

[shasan]

Yes but I think it is very unlikely that they would tell a borrower that the money would be used for gambling, because in general people are usually reluctant to lend money to gamblers even if they are gamblers who have good responsibility in their gambling activities or in the sense that they are gamblers who can maintain and control themselves well. This is because there have been quite a few cases that have occurred that it is really difficult for a gambler to be accountable for the decisions he has made such as borrowing money which in the end usually means that they run away from responsibility.

And maybe this is the reason why gamblers are usually secretive about what the money they borrow is for, usually they lie and say that the money will be used for something else which can also be a plan or scenario that looks desperate so that a borrower feels sorry for them and gives them a loan. This means that I think it is quite difficult to really identify what the money is being used for, unless the person is a very close friend of yours who you usually know about their habits.

I am sorry to say that I think it will not be a wise decision to lend money to a gambler though many times we have to lend it can make loser both the lender as well as a borrower as the gambler can lose the funds and for that reason if the person can't repay the fund then s/he can fall on a bad situation.

[TheUltraElite]

I am sorry to say that I think it will not be a wise decision to lend money to a gambler though many times we have to lend it can make loser both the lender as well as a borrower as the gambler can lose the funds and for that reason if the person can't repay the fund then s/he can fall on a bad situation.

The major loans on this forum end up being done for gambling and few for emergency needs.

If the player wins big, they will return if they dont, they have to cough it up from next salary. Either way it does act same on the borrower and the lender both having lost. However there is no alternative to this, gamblers on this forum come to the forum loans sharks and would not want to take money from the nearest bank for gambling.

Hence these things are risky to take as loan because its gambling all the way. Always avoid playing with borrowed money.

[Fortify]

It has become increasingly common for friends and not-so-close "friends" to come and ask me to borrow money. I don't usually ask for the purpose, but some ask me because of betting at online houses.

The last time I lent money to a colleague, who I hadn't had much contact with other than at work for a short period, it was with great difficulty that I got the money back.

I don't know where people get the amount of money they think I have, they must think I look like a bank...

Who likes having to borrow money? Unless you are a loan shark and lend with collateral where the risk is almost zero, why lend money where you end up with a loss? 'cause in addition to no one paying you with interest, most never pay you on time, at least you will get your money back after repeated charges.

Some people even go so far as to ask me to borrow money for what? to bet!! What a joke. I answer briefly and bluntly that I don't have the money to lend for these purposes!

And the worst thing is that they ask me for small amounts, like $2, 5, 10$... I think that if the person doesn't have that money now, the chances of them getting that money to pay you are low. If the person is in need, it's easier for them to confess right away to see what I can do, because I'm not a bad person.

Do you usually lend money to relatives, friends, etc.? Have you ever felt bad about it, done it unwillingly?

And when they are female friends, do you lend them?

Maybe you should start rethinking the type of friends that you have around you, because it seems like they are often trying to take advantage of you. If they are true friends then I would give them money on the basis that I do not expect it to be returned, if they do return it that is a bonus. However that should be a rare occasion, not a common or reoccurring pattern, because then they are treating you like an informal lender which is bound to end badly eventually. Why would you make the distinction about lending to "female" friends, are you a woman? Are you suggesting that it would somehow give you some other advantages, because that is a rather lousy viewpoint. If you don't feel comfortable lending, simply say no.