30+? Name one mistake you did to help others

[Obulis]

To all men and women of 30+, please name
one mistake you made in your life to guide
others from repeating it. Life is full of so much
experiences and inexperiences. There are so many
mistakes in a life time. Painfully, some of these
mistakes are repeatable sorrowfully unknownly
but some repetition are as a result of carelessness.
However the eyes of understanding is now clear
to some or most of these personal errors that
most mistakes did are obviously known!

One mistake?

Thinking that I would get a job immediately after
graduation from the high institution
Which seems like a fairy-tale based on nationality
and geographical location secondly.
Being afraid of doing mistakes is another mistake
I made

[franky1]

more then one.
not just my mistakes but also reactions ive observed to mistakes of others

but that is the magnificent thing of youth, learning from ones own mistakes(safely) by first making them
(getting advice from others is good, but people only truly learn by making the mistakes themselves or observing them play out first hand)

financial
wasting money on disposable/depreciating items just to show off to others that you "had" money
not investing from the start(first pay cheque)

social
putting on an act to appease others (not being true to yourself or them)
wasting time on losers that dont want to grow with you, but instead hold you back, drag you down

ethical/moral
making promises you may not be able to meet
exaggerating resume to get higher level positions of job applications but not quite having experience to fulfil the duties when in that role

education/skill
think that institutional education is the only way to learn
wasting seasons/years doing fixed courses, which could have been learned in days/weeks via google searches and trial&error implementation

[paxmao]

I repeatedly tried to show BADecker that he should not be walltexting thread after thread with "alternative" information - AKA plainly made stuff. But maybe it is a mistake, maybe is better to hit the"Ignore" button that every user has and let the walltext dissapear. Perhaps the first mistake is not to have a forum rule against such a systematic way of poluting the thread, but maybe it is my mistake and this is, in the end, what makes this place better - I mean, not BA posting crap, but allowing all short of opinions.

[Hewlet]

One of the signs that shows that you're growing is that you eventually realise some things about your past and then it guides you to make a better and more intentional decision.

One major mistake that's at my finger tips is trusting too much and always putting others first ahead of me. In the short run, it might give you a sense of self validation that you're just coming through for people but in the long run, it might lead you to being used and taken advantage of.
Another will be too comfortable around what I'm used to and not daring to do something extra. The comfort that comes with maintaining a circle you're used to or being too comfortable in an environment that moving out looks like a bad option can be really discouraging and if care is not taken you might remain stagnated at a spot.

[Marykeller]

Staying at your comfort zone for long, not thinking of leaving your comfort zone to explore in other places. The mistake a young man or lady would do is staying in their comfort zone because it is rossy for them without wanting to hustle in other places, to have a other taste of life on what it feels to hustle in a land far away from home.

Another mistake of life is, being judgemental about people way of life, without knowing about their life stories on what prompted the character they display.

[Apocollapse]

putting on an act to appease others (not being true to yourself or them)

I don't think it's wrong, depends on your goal though.

If you care about your mental health over everything, then you're correct. But, most people focus on money over their mental health, you have to do everything if you want to get a lot of money.

Let's say you never drink or smoke, but you see almost all rich people are drinker or smoker, in order to get rich, having a circle with rich people will encourage you to be rich.

making promises you may not be able to meet

Sometime you have to.

Let's say you purchase something from your family and you get terrible product or service, instead of complaining which might destroy your relationship with your family, you just accept it. Then your family said "thank you for order, hope you like it, don't forget to reach me again, okay?", if you not say yes, you will not have a good relationship with them.

exaggerating resume to get higher level positions of job applications but not quite having experience to fulfil the duties when in that role

It's better to get accepted and then get kicked instead of not get accepted at all, you will have better CV because you have an experience to be x position in x company, many companies consider top position/top companies when accepting their employees.

People who get accepted can learn while working, many of them survive and many of them not.

[franky1]

putting on an act to appease others (not being true to yourself or them)

I don't think it's wrong, depends on your goal though.

If you care about your mental health over everything, then you're correct. But, most people focus on money over their mental health, you have to do everything if you want to get a lot of money.

Let's say you never drink or smoke, but you see almost all rich people are drinker or smoker, in order to get rich, having a circle with rich people will encourage you to be rich.

sounds like your just guessing how rich peoples social circles work.. try to give advice based on experience not guesses..
it appears your life experiences are lacking and you are just throwing out idea's of how you think things should work..
the topic is suppose to be from those that went through the experiences or observed people close to them. to teach the next generation down what to avoid

anyways
rich people dont like liars.. if they find out you dont smoke when they offer you a cigar multiple times and you decline and find out you lied.. your not going to build good relationships
you wont like it when they ask to try one of your decent quality cigars they expect you to have bought and have on you, as you are a smoker right..
plus you wont like it when it is your turn to pay for the next round of decent quality whisky.. but good luck getting rich trying to impress the rich
(facepalm)

also if you think you will get rich just by hanging out with rich people, its obvious that your a gold digger. again its not going to win you good lasting relationships with your deceptions

be yourself let people get to know you, let them see that maybe you are not skilled at making money and let them mentor you. however if you just continually fake it, you wont get far. they will find out.
if you act like a success they will want to see your successes. and thats when your story falls apart. rich people would rather see a underdog story, someone who is willing to learn and wants to make something of themselves. not a liar who just wants to cheat and deceive

making promises you may not be able to meet

Sometime you have to.

Let's say you purchase something from your family and you get terrible product or service, instead of complaining which might destroy your relationship with your family, you just accept it. Then your family said "thank you for order, hope you like it, don't forget to reach me again, okay?", if you not say yes, you will not have a good relationship with them.

if you 100% intend to intentionally drop all contact with them forever. then be honest and tell them your issues, try to repair the relationship before you make it worse.
if you make a promise to call them but mistakenly forget. well thats ok, but try to call your family when you can.

if you are the type of person that would cut off all contact with a relative over something soo materialistic as something you got from them doesnt perform as intended.. then you really need to work on your social skills, especially in regards to how you base relationships on materialistic things as reasons to form friendships or break up familial relationships

exaggerating resume to get higher level positions of job applications but not quite having experience to fulfil the duties when in that role

It's better to get accepted and then get kicked instead of not get accepted at all, you will have better CV because you have an experience to be x position in x company, many companies consider top position/top companies when accepting their employees.

People who get accepted can learn while working, many of them survive and many of them not.

doing a low level job and seeing a supervisor does nearly the same job but a slight extra thing you have not been given responsibility to try but can see it looks easy enough. fine add it to your CV and learn as you go..

however putting down that you are a car mechanic because one time you changed your oil.. different story

ive seen people apply for some coding jobs where they dont have a clue about the language and only done basic coding via drop and drag module coding/ simple html stuff
they thought all languages had the same software to just drop and drag/cut and paste stuff together from existing resources/modules

they put down soo many other languages they didnt know and thought they could learn it all on the job. they didnt last a week and wont be getting any references

in this example. if you want to code LEARN HOW TO CODE

[rodskee]

Staying at your comfort zone for long, not thinking of leaving your comfort zone to explore in other places. The mistake a young man or lady would do is staying in their comfort zone because it is rossy for them without wanting to hustle in other places, to have a other taste of life on what it feels to hustle in a land far away from home.

you are right when we are too scared to do anything else this actually prevents us from ever reaching our maximum potential and we will ever see our potential if we leave our comfort zones for us to be successful we need to first be brave and prepare yourself be confident and always believe in yourself

[Vod]

To all men and women of 30+, please name
one mistake you made in your life to guide
others from repeating it.

A mistake I made on purpose to teach others not to do it?  Any mistakes would have been unintentional, so I wouldn't want others to learn from me.

[Agbamoni]

One mistake?

One mistake many people make including myself so to not seizing opportunities that present themselves as a young adult due to fear or doubt. We mostly overthink things and by the time we are ready, yet the time has passed for us to do that thing. At this age i have come to realize that you only fail when you don't try but when you try even when you think you have failed for trying its wrong. You’ll either succeed or learn, but you won’t be left wondering what if?

Currently i am also figuring out that working crazy hours take is not good. Don't work for life but work to live your life we don't know when it will all end.

[Kelward]

One big mistake that I have made a couple of times and I've seen others make and they often regretted is never lend what you cannot afford to loose to family and friends . Most times family and friends takes advantage of familiarity and never return what you loaned to them, you will become their enemy if you start to demand for the loan. Don't let money come between friendships, I've seen it ruin many relationships, it takes friends that have very high intergrity for money not to cause quarrels for them.

 It's better that you don't let people to know what you're truly worth, some will keep coming to you for money even when they're not in serious need of it because they feel entitled. If you must loan a reasonable amount to your loved ones do it through a third party, pretend that you're referring the third party to give them the loan, meanwhile it's your money. They will be compelled to repay the money because it's from an outsider.

[mocacinno]

• Starting discussions with conspiracy/religious/cult people would be one i learned to avoid over the years... You want to believe the earth is flat, go ahead, i won't stop you... If you try to discuss this with me, i'll just nod approvingly and smile whilst thinking by myself how misinformed you are. I've learned that these discussions lead to nothing, you won't convince them they are wrong, and starting a discussion just leads to anger and frustration... It's like playing chess with a chicken, no matter how good you are, the chicken will just jump on the playing board, knock over your pieces, take a dump in the middle of the board and strutt around like it has won
• Not researching the really big financial decisions... I once bought an appartment way over market price on a gut feeling, then bought a mortgage that seemed cheap at first glance but was way more expensive than competing bank's offers... If you make these mistakes, you'll be paying >100€ per month extra for years and years to come. Luckily (for me) the house prices rose pretty hard in the following years, so in the end i still did a reasonable deal, but using my due diligence would have saved me thousands in the long run
• not exercising, neglecting your condition and physical health... That's a big one for me, i fell in this trap and i'm defenately not in the clear yet... I learned it's better to continue eating right, visit a doctor and dentist once in a while and at least do some mild exercise on regular intervals instead of letting everything slide and be confronted with bigger medical issues, weight issues, dental issues,... in the long run
• not investing in property... At least in my country... I guess this might not always be the case... I bought some property when i first started working, sold it, bought something bigger,... I see friends my age (40+) that are still renting, they pay about the same in rent as i do in leftover mortgage, but in about 5 years my house is debt free, and they'll be paying a landlord untill the day they die
• not buying quality material... Focus on the word "quality". My parents are 70+ years old, they still believe that expensive = quality.... I have many items that were midrange in price, but higher quality than similar items in the high pricerange. Do your homework, look at what you want to buy and see what has the best price/quality ratio without looking at your peers... I don't need to drive a BMW, i have a Toyota, much cheaper but in general they tend to do better in the stats when it comes to reliability and longevity

[coolcoinz]

^
Those are some very good points. I haven't made these mistakes myself, but I feel the same way about all of these. I even drive a Toyota
Fun fact: we had a few cars together with my wife and she claims corolla is the easiest to drive. We were thinking about getting BMW 3 series, but it wasn't worth the price.

If I were to choose 1 mistake it was probably taking my parents for granted. They weren't that old, so being a kid I always thought I'll have my mum to rely on for decades, so as a normal teenager, I preferred to be out of the house as much as possible, spending time with friends, coming home late, then going to school in the morning... I barely saw my mother during the day. We'd talk at dinner for a while and that was it.
She died when I was 18 and never saw my wife or my kids and I wish she was here to see all of that.

Remember guys, value every moment! You can't turn back time.

[Apocollapse]

rich people dont like liars.. if they find out you dont smoke when they offer you a cigar multiple times and you decline and find out you lied.. your not going to build good relationships
you wont like it when they ask to try one of your decent quality cigars they expect you to have bought and have on you, as you are a smoker right..
plus you wont like it when it is your turn to pay for the next round of decent quality whisky.. but good luck getting rich trying to impress the rich
(facepalm)

Being liars doesn't mean you're entirely lying.

You can claim you're smoker, but you have to own and smoke in front of them, what you smoke? it's herbal cigarettes, it's tobacco free and won't make you addicted. That's what social smoker is, the reason why social smoker gets addicted is because they smoke real cigarettes.

if you are the type of person that would cut off all contact with a relative over something soo materialistic as something you got from them doesnt perform as intended.. then you really need to work on your social skills, especially in regards to how you base relationships on materialistic things as reasons to form friendships or break up familial relationships

I have to admit that my social skills isn't that good.

I'm not type of person who cut off all contact, I still chat and hanging around with them, but with very low frequency because I see no reason to get close with them.

doing a low level job and seeing a supervisor does nearly the same job but a slight extra thing you have not been given responsibility to try but can see it looks easy enough. fine add it to your CV and learn as you go..

however putting down that you are a car mechanic because one time you changed your oil.. different story

I wouldn't claim myself as a car mechanic, I would claim it junior car mechanic instead.

[BADecker]

My mistake? Placing jvanname on ignore. Haven't really figured out how it's a mistake or how it helped others. But it's gotta be there, somewhere.

[Fiatless]

I have tried to think about any mistake I have made this years and couldn't find any. Maybe I have forgotten but I don't regret any of my decision because majority of them have been right. Maybe I regret going to a Polytechnic instead of a University. But without going to the polytechnic I wouldn't have met some wonderful people in my life.

My advice is that we ensure that we maximize every opportunity you have because it might not come again. There is always a lesson to learn from a mistake. So I usually forget my mistakes and move on.

[franky1]

rich people dont like liars.. if they find out you dont smoke when they offer you a cigar multiple times and you decline and find out you lied.. your not going to build good relationships
you wont like it when they ask to try one of your decent quality cigars they expect you to have bought and have on you, as you are a smoker right..
plus you wont like it when it is your turn to pay for the next round of decent quality whisky.. but good luck getting rich trying to impress the rich
(facepalm)

You can claim you're smoker, but you have to own and smoke in front of them, what you smoke? it's herbal cigarettes, it's tobacco free and won't make you addicted. That's what social smoker is, the reason why social smoker gets addicted is because they smoke real cigarettes.

ok so you do smoke after all, just weed

so not sure why you used a hypothetical of being a non smoker but saying you smoked just to hang with rich people..
odd example you gave

..
anyway
back to the point before your odd example.. lying wont get you far. people find out eventually and it changes their view of you
just be yourself.
so in your case, admit you smoke weed with the rich guys.. they will respect your honesty and most wont judge you for smoking weed when declining their cuban cigars, infact they would respect you more for having your own preferences and confidence to say no to influential/mentor type people. it shows your not a boring sheep

[DeathAngel]

I am 30 years old & I’ve made many mistakes. Most of them are pretty normal things that we all do but if I was to try & advise younger people I’d say don’t be afraid of failure. Push yourself & don’t be lazy. I was quite smart at school but I was lazy, I always did the minimum required & I think that has held me back in life. 

[Sim_card]

One mistake in life is not to buy in competition with anyone because all fingers are not equal. If you are in competition with people, you will miss the right track and regret later. I had difficulties trying to meet up with my friends in life because I didn't take things serious.

[passwordnow]

That it's never too late to start and take risks. The younger ones can take as much risk as they can because they have ample time to correct and recover. Once they've entered some certain age, they think that it's too late for them to try something new. No, as long as you're living and you have the passion to do it, just do it. No one is going to stop you from doing that. It's better to fail doing it rather than not doing it at all and later you'll regret that moment that you'll always talk to your mind that you should have done it.