Gambling Addiction Needs Compassion, Not Judgment

[icebar]

So we have to be careful with the words we throw at someone, especially when we know they are already in a delicate situation. It becomes easier to understand them when we try to understand the situation they are really in.

As humans,we aren’t in the position to throw words at others because of their flaws.I believe no man on earth is perfect,you may think you’re perfect enough to judge someone but deep down you aren’t,there’s no addiction that’s more preferred to the other,most persons are just addicted to different things some are addicted to alcohol/hard drugs while some are even addicted to pornography,so in my own perspective have you checked round yourself and find out you aren’t addicted to nothing before pointing and condemning gamblers that are addicted.Nobody can be too careful,things happen,mistakes are made,so why not send words of advice to those victims instead of making mockery of them.

Your words certainly have logic. We have no right to give advice to others that we cannot follow ourselves. When we use anything in excess, it becomes the cause of our addiction. Those who gamble may have addiction, but instead of criticizing others by bragging about it, we should focus on how to avoid it. We should never criticize others for the mistakes that we are likely to make or have made in the past. We should never be too interested in the mistakes of others without admitting our own mistakes. People make mistakes and no one is above mistakes so don't treat other in this concern. It is better to focus on yourself than to find fault with others.

[Creeper0]

So should we show compassion without blaming a person who is addicted to drugs and sex? A person never becomes addicted to gambling by mistake, but rather becomes addicted to gambling due to lack of self-control. You know that gambling addiction is very harmful, yet why do you gamble with an addiction tendency?

Why don't you develop an addiction to good things? Because you don't do those things and don't develop an interest in those things. The main reason for gambling addiction is uncontrolled gambling and creating a lot of temptations in yourself. It is never possible to correct people addicted to gambling by showing compassion, but rather effective steps have to be taken.

[MorganaX]

You are right, if you want to bring gambling addicts back from gambling, you should not be harsh on them, but you should treat them with compassion and be friendly and bring them back to the right path. If you are harsh and fair towards them, instead of coming back, they will become more addicted and even choose the path of suicide by disappointing themselves. Family members of gambling addicts should evaluate them properly and share the good and bad with them from all sides. They should be kept in an environment where there is no opportunity to participate in gambling. If they are treated correctly and well, a gambling addict can be cured very easily.

I think this depends on the particular view of the gambler because there are different types of gambling addict and one is the type that feels they understand the importance of what it means to stop and also whole heartedly wants to stop but just having problems doing it and then there is the other faction that have gone crazy and needs special support and force from people around to make them actually stop the act.

[Pi-network314159]

You will never really understand how serious gambling addiction is unless you experience it yourself. We have all seen some topics and news about people being reported as gambling addicts. Sometimes we just laugh, sometimes we blame them for their stupidity instead of showing compassion.

I understand your point op, showing compassion is good  to a Gambling addict, but the question is that didn't they see the warning sign before they became addicted? Because as far as gambling is concerned, everyone knows the rules and when you abide by it, you escape the shackles of addiction, but when you wish to see the light at the end of the tunnel, you may get addicted. So some people don't need to be shown compassion because they deserve what they get. I can not see a greedy person who chose betting aggressively Instead of having self control and be compassionate about him, he should take responsibility of his actin by himself alone,  I  can't sympathize with him. Well I can only feel compassionate about him when I know he did the right thing but maybe a slight mistake, not an intentional act.

[Accardo]

So should we show compassion without blaming a person who is addicted to drugs and sex? A person never becomes addicted to gambling by mistake, but rather becomes addicted to gambling due to lack of self-control. You know that gambling addiction is very harmful, yet why do you gamble with an addiction tendency?

Why don't you develop an addiction to good things? Because you don't do those things and don't develop an interest in those things. The main reason for gambling addiction is uncontrolled gambling and creating a lot of temptations in yourself. It is never possible to correct people addicted to gambling by showing compassion, but rather effective steps have to be taken.

Of what use would the blame be to the problem player? Unfortunately, we are in a world where negativity thrives faster than positive thinking, people who are unstable mentally also get to be blamed for their misfortune, how then would the blame get to them, since they assume they're on the right track emotionally? These are stuff non-gamblers get to miss out about their loved ones who struggle with emotional disputes, it's not a matter of argument or laying multiple blames, the point is to be considerate about their welfare and get to be kind around them.

[Bluedrem]

I think this depends on the particular view of the gambler because there are different types of gambling addict and one is the type that feels they understand the importance of what it means to stop and also whole heartedly wants to stop but just having problems doing it and then there is the other faction that have gone crazy and needs special support and force from people around to make them actually stop the act.

Before starting gambling and after losing, gamblers may feel that gambling is too risky for their money for some time. Even though they realize the reality of gambling, one of the reasons for this is the illusion of money, they try their best to recover the money they have lost before and they constantly try to get back the money they have lost, but they never do that. Again, even if they are profitable, greed motivates them to gamble more.

[jaberwock]

While I do understand it, and yes they should get some compassion, if you are not stern about it, they could fall back. How do I know? I had a cousin who had a drinking problem, and he lost his liver because of it, he had to actually get someone else's liver and had to be in ICU for a while until that happened and they found one that matched, so all of this was not really easy, and his mother was always very nice to him and kind to him and ended up being not stern and angry enough, so he kept on drinking.

So if you want to save someone, even from themselves, you have to find the right balance, if you are too judgy and angry then you would push them away, if you are too relax and loving then they would be able to do whatever they want and won't get better.

[Lida93]

Snip

I think this depends on the particular view of the gambler because there are different types of gambling addict and one is the type that feels they understand the importance of what it means to stop and also whole heartedly wants to stop but just having problems doing it and then there is the other faction that have gone crazy and needs special support and force from people around to make them actually stop the act.

I understand the point you're making mate but in all we just have to at every moment treat these gambling addict victims with a sense of belonging and not actually going directly harsh on them, making judgemental statements that could make them feel already condemn, meanwhile your intentions were to drag them to an understanding of the harm the addiction is effecting on them. The approach at all time really do matters when talking with gambling addict about his problem.

[fredericktaylor]

In reality, no one wants to face addiction or ruin their beautiful life through gambling. But due to excessive greed of the gambler or reckless gambling without following the right rules, a gambler gradually faces addiction. In fact, addiction is very bad‌ once it gets involved in life it becomes very difficult to get out of it but you have to get proper treatment or create a good mindset in yourself and by keeping yourself away from gambling for a long time, you can gradually get out of addiction but your own willpower plays a big role in getting rid of gambling.

[Royal Cap]

While it is easy to spot other people's mistakes or stupidity from a distance, it is even harder to go through the same situation. Gambling or any addiction is actually like a mental cycle where people do not step in intentionally but get stuck in it due to emotions. Just like we easily say while sitting in front of the TV, I would have taken that shot or not made that mistake. But when we are on the field and have to face pressure, time and real situations then we understand how difficult it is to make decisions.  Therefore it is more important to try to understand someone's mental state without directly blaming or ridiculing them, because at that moment their judgment disappears.

[Ever-young]

I think this depends on the particular view of the gambler because there are different types of gambling addict and one is the type that feels they understand the importance of what it means to stop and also whole heartedly wants to stop but just having problems doing it and then there is the other faction that have gone crazy and needs special support and force from people around to make them actually stop the act.

Yeah, there’s really no one size fits all approach to curing or tending to gambling addiction, and this is because each situation might be unique or distinct from another and so would require you to first study the particular circumstances before knowing which method to administer or employ in that situation. There are some cases that requires some level of compassion and there are others that may actually require some level of criticism but of course a constructive one and not a judgemental one.

[Judith87403]

In reality, no one wants to face addiction or ruin their beautiful life through gambling. But due to excessive greed of the gambler or reckless gambling without following the right rules, a gambler gradually faces addiction. In fact, addiction is very bad‌ once it gets involved in life it becomes very difficult to get out of it but you have to get proper treatment or create a good mindset in yourself and by keeping yourself away from gambling for a long time, you can gradually get out of addiction but your own willpower plays a big role in getting rid of gambling.

If they can only discipline themselves to that extent of not engaging in reckless gambling, it won't have to affect them this much because one can only become addicted to gambling if them give it a chance, but if they take gambling in a responsible way, there is no way it will ruined their beautiful life and it will be an easy thing for them to follow the rules and gamble by it, as they can walk away anytime without having any issue in it and the entertainment will continue without harming them emotionally.

[leonair]

You will never really understand how serious gambling addiction is unless you experience it yourself. We have all seen some topics and news about people being reported as gambling addicts. Sometimes we just laugh, sometimes we blame them for their stupidity instead of showing compassion.

I say this because I experienced it myself. It is not easy to be addicted and no one really wishes to be addicted, it just happens. We who experience this are victims of our own weakness in gambling, lack of emotional control and bad decision making.

So we have to be careful with the words we throw at someone, especially when we know they are already in a delicate situation. It becomes easier to understand them when we try to understand the situation they are really in.

Not all gamblers are at the same stage, so it is not possible to make everyone better with the same treatment. Some people get better with sympathy, while others need strict rules to make them better. If you show sympathy to people addicted to gambling, their chances of getting out of their addiction are very low because when they are given sympathy, they may take it as a good thing and try to understand, but then when they are alone, the matter of gambling will come to their mind again, then sympathy will not work for them, they will gamble again. So, you have to apply it where it is needed.

[Chinesebaby]

You will never really understand how serious gambling addiction is unless you experience it yourself. We have all seen some topics and news about people being reported as gambling addicts. Sometimes we just laugh, sometimes we blame them for their stupidity instead of showing compassion.

Nobody forces anybody to be addicted to anything , be it gambling, alcohol or whatsoever. Because it is actually a personal decision people make by being irresponsible, and likewise failing to take responsibility for their actions. So if people caution you or speak I'll about you , simply because they want you to change, it's no reason to take it personal, because they all wants to see you gamble responsibly.

I say this because I experienced it myself. It is not easy to be addicted and no one really wishes to be addicted, it just happens.

I totally disagree with you on what you just said above about gambling addiction to just happen. Because addiction don't just happen like that. it is what happens gradually when the individual is irresponsible and fails to take responsibility of his or her actions.

So we have to be careful with the words we throw at someone, especially when we know they are already in a delicate situation. It becomes easier to understand them when we try to understand the situation they are really in.

Yes, it's true that nobody deserves harsh statement but care, but as an addicted gambler, it is also your responsibility to help yourself recover, since nobody can do it for you.

[sunsilk]

For the first time gambling addicts, I think that it's applicable. But for those who probably had 2nd or 3rd time, that's already a choice to mess themselves up and become addicted to gambling.

It's possible that a lot have worried already to these gambling addicts and have received love and suggestions on how to overcome it.

But, if they are only listeners and doesn't apply what are being told to them. It won't make a difference because it should be them that must help themselves first.

I agree that we have to be careful with the words we say to them but, expect that not everyone is going to be friendly to them. So, it can't be avoided if some people are rude.

If I care, I would not judge whether it is the first time or second time being addicted, because it is still addiction.

In fact, when you get addicted many times, it means you are in serious trouble and with that, they deserve more help. Aside from family, which is the easiest to approach if the gambler himself is not ashamed of his situation, we can also suggest going to a professional, there are pros who help addicted people.

It may not be free, but it is better than spending money regularly because of addiction.

I think once is enough but twice and more is too much. For the first time, there are for sure some help that they got.

And even for the second time, I think that there are also people who would like to help.

But when it gets most and more, they need to help themselves with that and it's becoming a choice after all when it's no longer the first time they fall for it.

[HONDACD125]

You will never really understand how serious gambling addiction is unless you experience it yourself. We have all seen some topics and news about people being reported as gambling addicts. Sometimes we just laugh, sometimes we blame them for their stupidity instead of showing compassion.

I say this because I experienced it myself. It is not easy to be addicted and no one really wishes to be addicted, it just happens. We who experience this are victims of our own weakness in gambling, lack of emotional control and bad decision making.

So we have to be careful with the words we throw at someone, especially when we know they are already in a delicate situation. It becomes easier to understand them when we try to understand the situation they are really in.

You are not wrong, but I would say that a person has to have control over themselves to avoid doing things that they know don't have positive outcomes in the long run. If you know how gambling works in general, you should know that overdoing it won't get you anything, so once you try your luck and see that it is not working out for you, that should be the point for you to stop, but if you overcommit, try to win at any cost and take it on your ego that you will either recover everything or lose everything you have, then it is your mistake, and there is nothing wrong in pointing out the mistakes that a person makes so that they can learn from them.

I know that blaming someone for what has been done won't do any good too, so I agree with it, but when you say that addiction just happens, I don't agree with it, because any person should know themselves, when you start to do something, you should know that you are emotionally unstable and that you don't have enough self-control, so if that thing requires a lot of patience and self-control, it might not be good for you, so you should avoid it, but if you don't even when you know, then you are not getting addicted just like that, but you are getting addicted because you are ignoring all the signals.

[savetheFORUM]

You will never really understand how serious gambling addiction is unless you experience it yourself. We have all seen some topics and news about people being reported as gambling addicts. Sometimes we just laugh, sometimes we blame them for their stupidity instead of showing compassion.

Absolutely true and yes it's easy to laugh but anyone who has gone through this addiction will know how mentally exhausting it is. You find any money and gamble it, then regret why you gambled, and the cycle goes on and on. I've honestly never laughed at anyone who I feel is addicted, although I haven't met anyone that admitted being addicted to gambling.

we have to be careful with the words we throw at someone, especially when we know they are already in a delicate situation. It becomes easier to understand them when we try to understand the situation they are really in.

For sure, one needs to understand there is a difference between a hobby and an addiction. A hobby is something the person is doing by choice but addiction is what we do by default and don't know how to stop. Just like smoking is an addiction, gambling is too, and perhaps a more dangerous one.

[CryptoBuds]

They will never get judged if they just show how responsible they are even if they gamble.

But if they abuse everything and made bad decision on gambling then this is part of consequences that they need to deal with.

So if people really want compassion then they must think about having good discipline. Because there's no people will criticized them if they didn't do anything bad that affect their lives.

But I consider gambling addiction as real mental health disorder. You could compare with drug addiction. Because if you look closely you will see that it changes the brain chemistry in such a way that it is impossible to stop playing alone without support. So the entire blame cannot be placed on that person. Because doing so will make it even tougher for him to make a comeback.

Again showing empathy does not mean condoning his wrong decisions. Rather it can encourage him to seek professional help. As a result he can easily get back on his feet. I have seen many addicted people who have been able to recover completely with proper accountability and support from the people around him.

[JunaidAzizi]

Sometimes we can't even know the depth of our words, and we can easily pass them on to someone, blaming them for what they did and making them feel like they did something terribly wrong with no way to return. Until you experience it for yourself, you may not understand. I was thinking about how celebrities come on screen and talk about how they are criticized and how traumatized they have been by it. I usually laughed at such things, but one day, when someone said something that wasn't too weird but was unacceptable to my mind, I thought about it a lot. I realized that, in my case, the thing wasn't harsh, it was just someone's words. I thought about it a lot, and then I imagined how they must feel when they read the comment section or when someone makes a video totally against them.

[SatoPrincess]

How can you have a compassion to someone who refused to listen to advise from the team me when he trying to become addicted gambler. There is no way people (other) gamblers would not advised him when he was losing money and still borrowing to gamble instead he followed his mind to do what he wanted. But if the gambler comes to you with a sincere heart, you can give a piece of advice but I can't go again after the multiple attempts to stopped him.

I think OP is right, hon can never really understand what addicts are going through unless you have experienced it directly or indirectly. If you truly care about a person, you would still have empathy for them even if they ignored your advice in the past because your support can be do more good than you think because the reality is that an addict needs community (friends and family) to be able to quit their addiction