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Author Topic: i just farted thread  (Read 1693 times)
KeyserSozeMC (OP)
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December 17, 2015, 06:41:27 PM
 #21

Seriously lol, the moment i clicked on the offtopic link, I had to fart very loud, I then discovered this great thread. In that order.
Coincidence?
I think not. Everything happens for a reason.

Hey, smexy. Don't waste your time. Time's precious.
nichu
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December 19, 2015, 02:30:47 AM
 #22

the worst is wet farts.. gotta hate it when your in the public and it's running down your leg !
Talking from experience?

I once had a similar scenario, in a 60 seat bus, where we were stuffed. 85+ people aboard. I leaked.
You can't imagine how much extra space I got in 1 minute after the leakage!

 Grin i dont know what else to say here, never thought people had these sort of bowel problems  Grin
why dont you consult a doctor for gas trouble  Grin Grin
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December 19, 2015, 02:31:12 AM
 #23

I farted. Just.

adibe
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December 19, 2015, 02:41:27 AM
 #24

just farted man Cheesy
High Plains Drifter
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December 19, 2015, 11:20:32 AM
 #25

Gas is not a problem, it's a blessing.  Now as for Spoetnik sharting all the time...well, I don't know about that

Believe in the Shield!
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December 19, 2015, 11:49:06 AM
 #26

just farted 5 mins ago
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December 19, 2015, 12:23:15 PM
 #27

the worst is wet farts.. gotta hate it when your in the public and it's running down your leg !
Talking from experience?

I once had a similar scenario, in a 60 seat bus, where we were stuffed. 85+ people aboard. I leaked.
You can't imagine how much extra space I got in 1 minute after the leakage!

Yup.. i shit myself getting off a bus !
I tried to get off the bus and run to a Wallmart.. i didn't make it Sad

I shit myself bad right in the parking lot.
Severe flood of shit liquid went flowing down both my legs.

It was winter in Canada so it was cold and i had to take off my jeans + long johns.
So i stood by the building and took off my shoes, socks then jeans and then my shit filled long johns..
I threw my long johns off to the side after using them to wipe my ass crack..
As people in cars by that point had started to stop by the side of the road to stare at me.
I imagine the people in the businesses across the street got a good laugh too.
My frozen shit covered pecker dangling in the breeze at like 7:30am in the middle of the parking lot.

Then..
I went inside and cleaned up some and had a hard time trying not to smear shit all over the bathroom stall.
I had shit so much it had flooded down my pants onto my shoes and it stunk REAL bad !

But..
I am Spoetnik dammit !

NEVER EVER FUCK WITH FUCK !

I had a plan and i was on a mission dammit !
So i grabbed me basket and i did me some fucking shopping.

You think i give a fuck ?
Puuuuuhlease nigga's i be rollin' liek a mutha fuckin pimp up in that biatch !


 Grin

So it was you at Wallmart's books alley.. 

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December 19, 2015, 05:10:32 PM
 #28

Nice pic LOL
Nope that wasn't me.. but i am the YellowPeePee monster ..Ggoogle it Wink

I remember when i was a kid in school a friend of mine passed a glass bottle over to me
when the teacher wasn't looking.. I did not understand.
I thought what is this about ? Hmmm
He said open it.. and smell it Wink
Smiles in a bottle !
I laughed and added to it and passed it along.

PS:
My previous shitting myself story was 100% true.
I was sick and i thought i was done with the bathroom before i left the house..
Then when i was on the bus to grab some stuff at Wallmart early in the morning
I started to feel my gut churning like crazy as the bus rattled and vibrated.
I almost lost it on the bus.. thanks god for my old "Buns Of Steel" work out tapes though..
I was able to hold it in.. but by the time i hit the parking lot maybe 50 yards from the bathroom / front door.
it all went tits up on me and it was brutal.. there was soooo much shit my pants were puffed up like ski pants.

It changed who i was forever !

I reached a whole new level of embarrassment.. a level i did not know existed yet.
This was a character changing event in my history.
It made me stronger.
I stood in that parking lot nude with snow on the ground every where
as cars we're starting to pull up and stop on the side of the road watching me..
I just did what i had to do.
And the idea of just getting back on the bus and going home way 100% out of the question.
Covered in shit reeking or not i was getting a basket dammit !
I got shopping to do !

The point is that could happen to ANY of you too.
And when it does buckle up for an intense life experience.
I felt like i was in surreal nightmare but it was reality.
How does the brain cope with being trapped in a shituation like that ?
in the end it makes you stronger and best of all now you have a funny story to tell.
..well at least i think it was funny (in hindsight)
First time i told this story online before on another forum i laughed so a hard i could barely type it out.

I post this so you can laugh at me or with me guys ..i don't care either way.. just laugh Grin

FUD first & ask questions later™
abhishek.g
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December 19, 2015, 05:37:20 PM
 #29

I did this few hours ago, its disgusting.
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December 19, 2015, 09:57:56 PM
 #30

Dam air biscuit smelled like an egg
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December 20, 2015, 07:27:01 PM
 #31

I farted now:)
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January 07, 2016, 08:04:40 AM
 #32

Just farted. lol.

 
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KeyserSozeMC (OP)
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January 07, 2016, 12:46:38 PM
 #33

You people never stop farting, huh?

Hey, smexy. Don't waste your time. Time's precious.
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January 08, 2016, 10:35:17 PM
 #34

smells like beef and cheese.... Tongue
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January 08, 2016, 11:02:01 PM
 #35

Idiocracy..... its happening.
   Cheesy

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January 09, 2016, 05:41:32 AM
 #36

Just dropped a nuke.

 
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Gleb Gamow
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January 10, 2016, 03:25:59 AM
 #37

Here I sit broken hearted,
Tried to shit, but only...

Nevermind! She's flowin' now.  Cool Cool Cool
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