mizerydearia's obnoxious health escapade

[bb113]

I just realized I assumed mizerydearia is a straight male for some reason. Sorry if I got that wrong.

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[mizerydearia]

I just realized I assumed mizerydearia is a straight male for some reason. Sorry if I got that wrong.

I'm not so sure what I am

[FlipPro]

I just realized I assumed mizerydearia is a straight male for some reason. Sorry if I got that wrong.

I'm not so sure what I am

Have you tried O-T-C anti fungal medication?

If you have does this help the itching/biting at all?

I to have suffered from chronic itching, so I know where you are coming from.

Also you might want to try gold-bond medicated lotion, 2-3 times a day. Your skin might just be damaged/not enough moisture.

Nonetheless you need to go see a good dermatologist, Internet forums will never get you the help you need.

Will donate some BTC to help out.

[mizerydearia]

I updated my journal with a new entry and some resources for visit to a psychiatric crisis walk-in center today and other things.  My therapist referred me to go there this last Tuesday.  I was prescribed Paroxetine Hydrochloride for depression and Risperidone for mental/mood disorder, though the doctor specifically indicated that the latter medicine was for the nibble sensations.  O_O  I feel as if he did not understand that I wanted to be treated for the nibbling sensations and not for mental or psychological concerns.



see more pics and stuff in resources

Researching Paroxetine, I see:

General side effects are mostly present during the first 1–4 weeks while the body acquires a tolerance to the drug, although once this happens, withdrawal can cause a rebound effect with symptoms re-emerging in an exaggerated form for very long periods of time.

Many psychoactive medications can cause withdrawal symptoms upon discontinuation from administration.

Evidence has shown that paroxetine has among the highest incidence rates and severity of withdrawal syndrome of any medication of its class.

Common withdrawal symptoms for paroxetine include nausea, dizziness, lightheadedness and vertigo; insomnia, nightmares and vivid dreams; feelings of electricity in the body, as well as crying and anxiety.

Paroxetine prescribing information posted at GlaxoSmithKline now acknowledges the occurrence of a discontinuation syndrome, including serious discontinuation symptoms.

This scares me and reinforces that which I despise medication.  I do not trust taking that particular medication.

Researching Risperidone I see:

that it seems okay mostly.  Is there anything that I should be concerned about?  I am still hesitant to start taking it though. =/  My concern is more relative to the nibble sensations than that of depression or mental disorder.  I would rather first cure/resolve these nibbling sensations.

[notme]

I would advise getting a second opinion from DrG.
https://bitcointalk.org/index.php?topic=64287.0

He may be able to help clear up any confusion, and he accepts BTC donations for his medical mission.

[mizerydearia]

One of my previous housemates responded to me:

i just read through the whole thread at https://bitcointalk.org/index.php?topic=55565.40 and i kept thinking about a particular thing. this is something i've thought about before in conjunction with your lifestyle when you lived with me. i think the products you use and the frequency with which you shower might be very detrimental to you.
 
sodium lauryl sulfates and other chemicals are in the hair and body products that you use. just look up sodium lauryl sulfates and there's a huge amount of information about their harmfulness. showering/bathing every day may not show symptoms for awhile, but there is a cumulative damage that goes on, and perhaps your immune system was strong enough to keep it from your awareness until the stress of the apartment your father made you live in. the experience in that apartment could have been a trigger for you to become hyper-aware of the detriment caused by sodium lauryl sulfates (and other chemicals in personal cleansing products) while at the same time weakening your body and causing all the symptoms to become more severe, and then your increased bathing in response will continue to further dry and strip your skin and hair of essential oils and even destroy the cells.
 
the description you gave of your hair strands falling apart is pretty much the same as what i used to experience when i was bleaching my hair and dying it green and then swimming laps in the lawrence university pool and not always showering afterwards to wash the chlorine off myself. i had never had any problems with dry skin before in my life and i really didn't care about damaging my hair. i developed guttate psoriasis after i graduated because i was going swimming every single day and the chlorine was damaging my skin to the point that my immune system was mistaking damaged skin cells for pathogens. first i started to shower more diligently after swimming, to remove the chlorine, but that didn't help and it made my skin drier and made the psoriasis worse. i tried using lotions and they made it worse. i had to go to new york to perform in rocky horror picture show and i was very concerned about what looked like a terrible rash all over my skin when i had to perform nearly naked in front of thousands of people, so i saw a doctor and got a cream for the psoriasis before i went to new york, and stopped swimming for about a week to give the cream a chance to fix my skin. the cream worked. i went to new york and it was all good. i came back and started swimming again and the psoriasis came back. then it got cold and i stopped swimming and i used some more of my cream because the winter was giving me dry skin in a way that it never had before, but by the spring of 2005 the psoriasis was under control and my swimming habits were sadly interrupted and i never did get back into that routine.
 
anyways, the whole time i'd been swimming and bleaching/dying my hair, i was well aware of how this was killing it. and it was pretty much just like you described your own hair. i chopped all my hair off a year or so later, and eventually shaved most of my head as you know. once i started letting my hair grow out again, it was thick and lush and undamaged like when i was a child. it was beautiful. i always knew i could do that, so i never worried about what i was doing to my hair. play with it, kill it, it'll just grow back.
 
but the psoriasis on my skin prompted me to do a lot of research into chemicals and their impact, and i've done a lot of experiments and noticed a significant difference between using commercial products versus using super-expensive custom-made all-natural products. i couldn't really afford the super expensive products, so i opted to shower and wash my hair much less frequently, to conserve the products i'd purchased.  i had already learned during college that if i go for a month or so without bathing, once my hair got through the greasy phase, it was suddenly wonderful, as though it was conditioned, even though it wasn't even washed. but when i was trying to conserve my expensive shampoo and body wash stuff, i discovered that simply decreasing my showering to 2 or 3 times a week instead of daily, had visible results of better skin and hair within a couple weeks, and greatly greatly reduced dry skin. ever since the psoriasis in 2004, i'd had terrible problems with dry skin in the winter, itchiness that was so bad i'd scratch until i bled sometimes. but after i stopped showering daily, i haven't had that kind of dry skin ever since.
 
my situation is different from yours in very significant regards, but i think certain similarities are notable and will hopefully give you more insight into your own condition and help you figure out how to heal from it.
 
another thing i thought of while reading that forum thread was when someone mentioned vitamin B and other nutritional deficiencies. i know people who have had anorexia-related nutritional deficiencies who had similar symptoms as yours, but their experiences were related to me vaguely so i don't have much to share on this topic, other than that this is definitely something to look into. i personally have varying degrees of B and D vitamin deficiencies from time to time because of my almost meatless diet and my alcoholism, and one prominent side effect of this is that my skin bruises and tears and scars very easily and takes a long time to heal. i've never had particularly sensitive skin, but i can imagine how easily-damaged and hyper-sensitive could arise from the same sort of phenomenon.

So, I shall try to take showers less, try to not shower daily, and also effortfully try not to take baths.  It will be very difficult for me especially as I awaken and every time I do after a long duration of sleep I feel so dirty and grimy and my eyes, I need to rinse off the muck off and around my eyes, and my hair, I must....  no, I can't.  Even as I only bathe and shower many times and do not use any chemicals, perhaps it is merely the water, even the hard water that is here, that is dissolving my hair and my skin.  So, I shall try to shower less.

Again, this post is relevant.

[bb113]

Habits are hard to break. It takes about two weeks for a scratch to heal, same for your brain to adjust. However, that piece of skin and your brain have been forever changed by the experience, and are no longer as they were. It will be similar to quitting smoking. I would recommend that when you feel like smoking... crap I mean showering, you do something that is even more addictive than showering has become for you...

[bb113]

One of my previous housemates responded to me:

So, I shall try to take showers less, try to not shower daily, and also effortfully try not to take baths.  It will be very difficult for me especially as I awaken and every time I do after a long duration of sleep I feel so dirty and grimy and my eyes, I need to rinse off the muck off and around my eyes, and my hair, I must....  no, I can't.  Even as I only bathe and shower many times and do not use any chemicals, perhaps it is merely the water, even the hard water that is here, that is dissolving my hair and my skin.  So, I shall try to shower less.

Again, this post is relevant.

With regards to feeling grimy... this is a psychological thing. Some people even like a grimy feeling. The only reason most people wash so often is that we live, work indoors and BO can be annoying to others around you. It is not "natural" to wash so often, but then neither is spending most of your time in an indoor climate controlled environment. As to the muck around your eyes... Do you wear contacts, or have in the past? Do you sleep with a fan on in the room?

[mizerydearia]

Hi Bitcoin community.

I am just chiming in to say that I will be relocating to Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania shortly after April 5th as part of some kind of effort so that I can experiment with a lifestyle where I do not live in the same living space all day every day and especially one where I can actively be outdoors most frequently, constantly moving, perhaps getting away from the idea of parasites chasing after me, or rather, thriving whereever I am.

Again, for the case that my health issue is psychological, then me experimentation/evaluation may portray my experimentation as ineffective or unresolvable.

Though, in the case it is parasitical, perhaps I may observe some kind of escape, but also, still I consider that in the case it is parasitical, I may be host to them in which they thrive and propagate from me and thus, I will never get rid of them.

Also, there is another reason why I desire to go to Pittsburgh.  It is to be near someone that is very inspirational and motivational for me to continue where I am becoming very desperately overwhelmed and emotionally distressed, and I wish to lead a more outdoor lifestyle, but I am seemingly unable to do so here, living in this living space where I am accustomed to, and unable to establish new patterns or new habits.  

I will still be around periodically to update my journal and also perhaps even I can contribute effort to resolve witcoin conflict, and I really would like to.

Also, if anyone lives in or is nearby Pittsburgh, perhaps I can be available to introduce myself.  And then the bitcoin community can capture me and hold me hostage until I resolve the things I've been neglecting (e.g. witcoin), but preferably or ideally I would like to be held hostage in a mobile fashion, one where I can escape traumatizing nibbling sensations from staying in the same place for too long.

Also, of the medication that I was prescribed, I wish to postpone consuming them until after I endure experimenting as mentioned above.  They do not expire until next year, so I should still have the opportunity to resort to psychological/mental treatment/medication in the case that my experiments/tests/observations do not yield recognition of a biological health issue.

l3estest l2egardedsness,
Miz

[BrightAnarchist]

Have you looked at this?

http://www.morgellons-research.org/morgellons/morgellons-treatments.htm

[mizerydearia]

Have you looked at this?

http://www.morgellons-research.org/morgellons/morgellons-treatments.htm

Yep. Last year I added to https://gitorious.org/health-journal/mizerydearia/blobs/master/infos and https://gitorious.org/health-journal/mizerydearia/blobs/master/links

I do not have "black specks, fibers or pustules" and thus my health issue is not related to Morgellon's

Also, this thread is connected/related.

[mizerydearia]

Note: I have not taken the medications yet.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1TwdsYVHjGA

Risperidone is Risperdal

[bb113]

Just don't start taking them then stop. Follow the schedule the doctor told you once you start. I had a friend start rispiridone (along with some other stuff) and he started getting all paranoid and shit for awhile then it subsided once his brain got used to it. The way these drugs are supposed to work is long-term changing the levels of your neurotransmitters and receptors, not right away. No personal experience with it though.

[mizerydearia]

Just don't start taking them then stop. Follow the schedule the doctor told you once you start. I had a friend start rispiridone (along with some other stuff) and he started getting all paranoid and shit for awhile then it subsided once his brain got used to it. The way these drugs are supposed to work is long-term changing the levels of your neurotransmitters and receptors, not right away. No personal experience with it though.

I'm not so sure.  I've been watching way too many youtube vids from keyword: "risperidone" or "risperdal" and I am even more traumatized now watching them portraying the experiences of others as they had endured for years of taking the medication.  But they are fake, right?  I should not believe things I see on the Internet.  Doctors know what they are doing.  There is no such thing as evilness or corruption.  us dollar is good.  bitcoin is bad.  I have found you can find happiness in slavery.

But still, I know what I must do relative to my own rationality and competency that I strive to consistently maintain (besides the sarcasm as shown above).  I trust myself.  And especially I have a health journal for these very things that I fear, uncertainty of the health industry or the medical industry.  I shall still continue to actively participate, but also I will still document things.  As I arrive in Pittsburgh, I would like to begin the habit of voice recording all interactions with doctors and others and provide text transcripts of everything so that I can provide even more account of many important things and efforts that progress.  There have been many key things that have been discussed between my therapist and myself that are forever lost in time.  I would like to prevent that in the future.

Again, as much as this is a battle for myself, it's also a battle for everyone else that has similar health issues.  I need more hit points to sustain this battle.  Does anyone have any healing potions?

At least I keep telling myself that, ever since someone suggested to start a journal.