The homepage for Amplify has some of the worst copy I've ever seen on a "professional" product. I took some screenshots as I was reading it. I'm sure they've fixed a lot of it by now but I'm in shock by how incredibly poor this was. I hope they weren't paying anyone to write the copy because this is just absolute poop. If they paid someone to do this it's a bad sign that the Substratum management can't assess good writing and doesn't have any better options to do the work. Alternatively, they might have written the thing themselves, in which case it's terrifying that they can only write at an eighth-grade level and that they didn't realize their poor copy should be edited before it is published.
Anyway, here are some screenshots and my comments on them. The list is long and tedious but got damn, there is just a ton of shitty writing all over this project. I'm shook. Just about every paragraph had something terrible in it.
https://imgur.com/a/7tfuyE1The author used "borne", that probably should be "was born" but isn't strictly wrong. They use borne here but don't stick to it throughout the website, though, so it looks like a mistake.
"Three separate products..." This entire thing is not a sentence.
"The ability to Connect, Earn and Spend." is absolutely not a sentence and none of those words have any reason to be capitalized.
"...digital borders raised..." Walls are raised, borders are drawn.
https://imgur.com/a/zDaVCjR"Setting out in July 2017..." This should be "July of 2017" or something like that. This whole sentence should probably be two sentences as it wanders quite a bit.
"...one single whole hybrid web..." This is babble, and it's also a big new idea brought up near the top of the page without any explanation.
"...this project ensures..." This looks like it's the start of a second sentence. Honestly this whole sentence is just shit, I don't even know what they're doing here.
https://imgur.com/a/zztpVYt"...gateway to allow..." This should be "that allows". Elementary stuff, guys.
"Crypto to crypto transactions..." This is an adjective and should be hyphenated. This is the first of many hyphenation errors, the author doesn't know when to use them.
"...crypto to fiat resolution..." Another adjective without hyphens.
"...third party tools..." Another adjective without hyphens.
This whole last sentence is just too long. It may be a run-on.
https://imgur.com/a/WYWELX7"...third main need..." None of these needs were enumerated before in this document. If they're so "main" why are there three of them? Poor writing.
https://imgur.com/a/HSAYIUL"...web-site..." The author finally uses a hyphen and they screw it up. This whole sentence is phrased weirdly and wordily. The paragraph should probably be restructured to describe distributed exchanges (also not a proper noun) first and then go on to say that they're a majority of the space. Whatever "the space" is. Also not sure why they got into the weeds with words like "relational database" in a high-level sales pitch.
https://imgur.com/a/e0ioNCgThat second paragraph is a train wreck of a run-on sentence.
"...or worse loss of funds." Try ", or worse,", it needs to have commas.
"...also." Wrong.
https://imgur.com/a/hCZ6POM"...best in breed..." Another adjective without hyphens.
"...blockhain based..." Another adjective
"Learn More..." Not sure why More is capitalized.
https://imgur.com/a/A6x5XPf"One of Amplify's strengths..." This is unclear. What does it mean to "serve up" a portfolio? What is this portfolio API that you're talking about. This is the first time it's been mentioned on the website.
"This is just another step..." This should be phrased differently, either folded into the sentence above it or left out entirely (if it's truly revolutionary you don't need to hit people over the head with the idea that it is).
"Tokens and Coins..." These aren't proper nouns!
"...purchase through..." purchaseD
"...through this direct integration." Wordy and unnecessary. Kill it.
https://imgur.com/a/D7c2LpUThis second paragraph is amateurishly choppy and wordy.
https://imgur.com/a/rqt8SoD"...is huge and has never been done before!" Show, don't tell. Amateurish.
https://imgur.com/a/cjP1D4b"...called: The Popularis Protocol." This is the wrong use of a colon and the "The" shouldn't be capitalized. The sentence should be flipped around to not use the colon.
"...the block number is an odd or even on the ledger." If a number is odd or even you just say "is odd or even." No "an". The part about "on the ledger" looks redundant in the grammar of the sentence and is likely wrong in a technical way.
https://imgur.com/a/gngM95wEnumerating the odd and even integers? Do you really hold your readers in that low regard? I mean, I guess they have to, if they're writing like this the kind of person who falls for this poop has to be a moron. I am also pretty sure they're using the last digit of the block number for this which is not mentioned anywhere.
https://imgur.com/a/yiEIzM2"...even numbered block..." Another adjective without a hyphen!
"...still..." this word adds nothing to the sentence and should be deleted.
The last sentence needs a "for" and has to lose a comma.
https://imgur.com/a/91mKzTT"...odd numbered block,..." Needs a hyphen! The comma is wrong too. The previous paragraph had the bad comma as well.
"...providing..." provides.
https://imgur.com/a/k4fHPba"...often, and fairly,..." These commas don't belong there!
Wondering if "stakeholders" is not the best word to use here given that proof of stake is part of the system while this paragraph is using it to mean all miners. On the technical front, how are you dealing with sybil attacks?
https://imgur.com/a/g3PWYlc"...history long rooted..." How about "long-rooted history"? You probably could have googled that one.
"...technology from..." This is a run-on sentence. Going to go out on a limb and guess that Justin wrote all the copy for this website because his own bio has all these stupid mistakes in them.
"Maintaining..." This sentence should start with "After" to make a prepositional phrase out of the first part of the sentence. The sentence is incorrect without it.
"...Ecosystem..." This isn't a proper noun.
https://imgur.com/a/0nyvhqN"...excutive team's..." Take a guess!
"3 of those..." "...1 on..." Numbers must be spelled out.
"IPO-ed" Not seeing this hyphenated in a Google search, looks wrong to me.
"...Cryptocurrency..." Lowercase!
"...institutional grade..." Hyphens! The rest of this sentence is garbage too.
"Also as importantly,..." bad grammar
"...post ICO..." HYPHENS. This sentence is also a sentence fragment.
"..Banking, Finance, Technology and Fundraising..." none of these are proper nouns. Not even a little bit.
"...hungry maturing..." This should be a series.
https://imgur.com/a/FpOPUaD"...Investment Advisor." This isn't a proper noun.
"...engineering, Warren..." I think this comma is wrong but not sure.
"...Stocks, Options, Futures, and Cryptocurrency..." None of these are proper nouns as well. Wondering if these two bios were both written by the same secondary author.
Anyway that was a bunch of nonsense, this whole thing is amateurish crap, I can't believe nobody else is in as much disbelief as I am so I guess that means the people buying this thing are a bunch of dumb sheep.
stuff like this is tedious and takes time and effort - but is elucidating once finished- appreciated!
