Is it Ideal for parents to demand rent from their child who stays with them?

[boyptc]

Overall, I think this is a fairly fair point of view. After all, our children always see themselves as adults. And as soon as they get a job, they should have a different understanding, in the sense that life isn't a fun time. If parents provide shelter for their children, then they should help pay their utilities.

That's the kind of setup that many struggling young adults do. Responsible parents will always open their doors to their kids and even have no problem if they don't pay their bills and help with the utilities.

But, that teaches them one thing about responsibility and their parents aren't there always for them.

And that's why if they are not paying for rent, they should allot some money that should go for rent and use it for utilities and bills and even some foods and groceries, they're a family still.

As that teaches them how to contribute when they're benefiting from someone's help even it's their parents.

[Dunamisx]

Of what essence should this be, if a child is able enough to afford paying a rent then tell me why can't he go and rent an apartment outside the family house and leave his parents, we should know this that parents have to be very careful by not allowing some moral pleasures and desires to take away their future hope they should have or enjoy from their children once a child is brought up in a normal way, then they should learn in real life how to leave an independent life, whereby they can stay on their own and leave to enjoying their life they deserved and not being in camp under parents to leave.

[DrBeer]

Of what essence should this be, if a child is able enough to afford paying a rent then tell me why can't he go and rent an apartment outside the family house and leave his parents, we should know this that parents have to be very careful by not allowing some moral pleasures and desires to take away their future hope they should have or enjoy from their children once a child is brought up in a normal way, then they should learn in real life how to leave an independent life, whereby they can stay on their own and leave to enjoying their life they deserved and not being in camp under parents to leave.

The idea is for the child to understand that their parents love them, raise them, and educate them, but that as a member of the family, they also have responsibilities and obligations, and that later in life, they will have to pay for many of the things that their parents give them for free. It is important to make sure that the child understands and realizes this reality, rather than living with their parents at their expense until the age of 40+, as sometimes happens...
 

[Jody.Drummer]

Parents today give opportunity to earn from very childhood. From keeping the house, to helping them at work. My parents were paying me vacuum cleaning our flat and cleaning dust. It was my weekly duty. However, I did not get paid for washing dishes. It was an unspoken rule that  I had to clean after myself and help parents. From age 12 or 14 I was helping my mother at work, doing «paper work» at work (I had to put documents in transparent files/scan them). Parents gave me lots of opportunities to earn cash money. There children in the hood or among friend, who were receiving everything «at request». For example I had to save and earn money to buy video console, when others got it «just as a random gift». Children who got used to receiving everything without struggle, live with parents for as long as possible and they imo should be charged for staying at parents house.

When I graduated from school and went to university, during practice (still living with parents) I was working part time and spend half of salary on «house». My duty was to pay for the internet, as I was its frequent user. I also add money (my free will) when parents were buying some expensive stuff (big tv, did some repairs at home). That was not a «direct payment for rent», but I was involved into expenses on the house. And I find if fair to do so.

In my opinion, this is a wonderful example of how to raise a child properly and help them understand how the market works, what money is, what responsibilities are, and what work is! I am sure that this makes life much easier and simpler in this world, the financial world!
And of course, I agree that children should not be spoiled with money just like that, because it creates a habit, a very bad habit. Then they will simply demand, rejecting the idea of “go earn it yourself.”

Spoiling children by always giving them what they want is wrong, and giving them money continuously is not a good thing, even though it is natural for parents to do so. Spoiling children too much will make them too dependent on their parents, which will certainly affect them as they may dare to do anything because it is not their ambition but because they think their parents can solve any problems that may arise.
It is better for children to be independent, as this is not only good for them but also makes their parents proud.

[dunfida]

Parents today give opportunity to earn from very childhood. From keeping the house, to helping them at work. My parents were paying me vacuum cleaning our flat and cleaning dust. It was my weekly duty. However, I did not get paid for washing dishes. It was an unspoken rule that  I had to clean after myself and help parents. From age 12 or 14 I was helping my mother at work, doing «paper work» at work (I had to put documents in transparent files/scan them). Parents gave me lots of opportunities to earn cash money. There children in the hood or among friend, who were receiving everything «at request». For example I had to save and earn money to buy video console, when others got it «just as a random gift». Children who got used to receiving everything without struggle, live with parents for as long as possible and they imo should be charged for staying at parents house.

When I graduated from school and went to university, during practice (still living with parents) I was working part time and spend half of salary on «house». My duty was to pay for the internet, as I was its frequent user. I also add money (my free will) when parents were buying some expensive stuff (big tv, did some repairs at home). That was not a «direct payment for rent», but I was involved into expenses on the house. And I find if fair to do so.

In my opinion, this is a wonderful example of how to raise a child properly and help them understand how the market works, what money is, what responsibilities are, and what work is! I am sure that this makes life much easier and simpler in this world, the financial world!
And of course, I agree that children should not be spoiled with money just like that, because it creates a habit, a very bad habit. Then they will simply demand, rejecting the idea of “go earn it yourself.”

Spoiling children by always giving them what they want is wrong, and giving them money continuously is not a good thing, even though it is natural for parents to do so. Spoiling children too much will make them too dependent on their parents, which will certainly affect them as they may dare to do anything because it is not their ambition but because they think their parents can solve any problems that may arise.
It is better for children to be independent, as this is not only good for them but also makes their parents proud.

We parents would be really be loving to give everything for our child or simply giving the comfortable life on which is not something bad. We dont want for them to experience on what are those experiences that we do have in the past specially if you do came from a family which are on the average side and experiencing some financial hardship in life. This is why some parents would be spoiling up their children and giving all they want but of course we do know that everything which is too much is really bad because once they do get used to into things like that then they would be that highly dependent and someone couldnt be mature enough at the time that they will be that on their own. This is why proper parenting and having that control and discipline is much recommended.

Now, in speaking about thinking about asking or demanding their kids to pay up some rent then its not something that necessary or obliged as parents since we are the ones would be supporting our child but of course there would be that limitation because if your kid is already that old enough and having some work then its not that bad on telling or mentioning about it. If they would be helping out then its good but if its not then its better not to force it out.

[DrBeer]

Parents today give opportunity to earn from very childhood. From keeping the house, to helping them at work. My parents were paying me vacuum cleaning our flat and cleaning dust. It was my weekly duty. However, I did not get paid for washing dishes. It was an unspoken rule that  I had to clean after myself and help parents. From age 12 or 14 I was helping my mother at work, doing «paper work» at work (I had to put documents in transparent files/scan them). Parents gave me lots of opportunities to earn cash money. There children in the hood or among friend, who were receiving everything «at request». For example I had to save and earn money to buy video console, when others got it «just as a random gift». Children who got used to receiving everything without struggle, live with parents for as long as possible and they imo should be charged for staying at parents house.

When I graduated from school and went to university, during practice (still living with parents) I was working part time and spend half of salary on «house». My duty was to pay for the internet, as I was its frequent user. I also add money (my free will) when parents were buying some expensive stuff (big tv, did some repairs at home). That was not a «direct payment for rent», but I was involved into expenses on the house. And I find if fair to do so.

In my opinion, this is a wonderful example of how to raise a child properly and help them understand how the market works, what money is, what responsibilities are, and what work is! I am sure that this makes life much easier and simpler in this world, the financial world!
And of course, I agree that children should not be spoiled with money just like that, because it creates a habit, a very bad habit. Then they will simply demand, rejecting the idea of “go earn it yourself.”

Spoiling children by always giving them what they want is wrong, and giving them money continuously is not a good thing, even though it is natural for parents to do so. Spoiling children too much will make them too dependent on their parents, which will certainly affect them as they may dare to do anything because it is not their ambition but because they think their parents can solve any problems that may arise.
It is better for children to be independent, as this is not only good for them but also makes their parents proud.

We parents would be really be loving to give everything for our child or simply giving the comfortable life on which is not something bad. We dont want for them to experience on what are those experiences that we do have in the past specially if you do came from a family which are on the average side and experiencing some financial hardship in life. This is why some parents would be spoiling up their children and giving all they want but of course we do know that everything which is too much is really bad because once they do get used to into things like that then they would be that highly dependent and someone couldnt be mature enough at the time that they will be that on their own. This is why proper parenting and having that control and discipline is much recommended.

Now, in speaking about thinking about asking or demanding their kids to pay up some rent then its not something that necessary or obliged as parents since we are the ones would be supporting our child but of course there would be that limitation because if your kid is already that old enough and having some work then its not that bad on telling or mentioning about it. If they would be helping out then its good but if its not then its better not to force it out.

I'll answer both of you at once

Jody.Drummer - you are absolutely right, pampering breeds selfishness and infantile adults. Not only is this nothing to be proud of, but it will also be extremely difficult for such children to adapt to an independent, adult, and REAL life, where there will be no caring, overly protective parents.
I adhere to the following concept: until a child learns to walk on their own, help them, support them, but do not carry them! When the child starts walking, warn them about the risks of falling and explain how to avoid them. When they fall, lend a hand and explain again why it happened.
But running around and wailing near the child, blaming “the pebble in his path” is absolutely unacceptable!

dunfida - and you are also right in saying that good parents try to prevent their children from experiencing the same things they themselves suffered from at the start of their lives. That's normal.
But here we must understand that there must be a certain limit when our care can begin to lay the groundwork for and subsequently produce a completely different result. We must love and support our children, but we must not raise them to be selfish, incapable of providing for themselves and their children.

Remember the saying, “Hard times breed strong people, strong people create good times, good times breed weak people, and weak people create hard times”? It applies to us and our children

[lizarder]

Generally, working-class children who stay with their parents do so to be able to save up enough money to start a fresh journey in life. Although it's still cheap to contribute to the bills like paying rent, buying groceries, etc compared to when they live outside their parent's house. But, young people like the girl in the article find it outrageous. Going through the article I saw responses from parents who admit they do the same thing. Do you think it's fine as a parent to demand bills such as rent from your working-class child because s/he stays in your house?  

If it's just to help their parents, it might not be a problem at all, as it's a child's responsibility to help them. But if parents force or burden their children for any reason, I don't think this is a good culture for any parent. Even if their daughter is working, forcing her to pay the regular bills is a bad culture, especially in the community where I live. However, this isn't something to argue about as long as communication is good, so the child and parent can find a solution together.

If a child wants to help their parents without being burdened by the costs, this might not be a problem and in fact, it's much better. What's more problematic is when a child only earns a small salary and being burdened with the bills can make the child even more stressed because their salary isn't enough. That's why good communication is important so that both parties aren't hurting each other and can actually help each other.

[Fiasem20]

In my own opinion,it’s ideal for a parent to demand rent from their child who’s stilling living with them.Even if you’re not living with them it’s still ideal to demand rent from your children as a parent.Most especially if the child has something doing that gives him/her money,in their own little way of supporting the family financially they can add up their money with that of their parents to provide the basic needs of life.But what I wouldn’t agree to is when the parent convince their children to indulge in illegal practices in other to provide or show support to the family.

[Jody.Drummer]

Spoiling children by always giving them what they want is wrong, and giving them money continuously is not a good thing, even though it is natural for parents to do so. Spoiling children too much will make them too dependent on their parents, which will certainly affect them as they may dare to do anything because it is not their ambition but because they think their parents can solve any problems that may arise.
It is better for children to be independent, as this is not only good for them but also makes their parents proud.

We parents would be really be loving to give everything for our child or simply giving the comfortable life on which is not something bad. We dont want for them to experience on what are those experiences that we do have in the past specially if you do came from a family which are on the average side and experiencing some financial hardship in life. This is why some parents would be spoiling up their children and giving all they want but of course we do know that everything which is too much is really bad because once they do get used to into things like that then they would be that highly dependent and someone couldnt be mature enough at the time that they will be that on their own. This is why proper parenting and having that control and discipline is much recommended.

Now, in speaking about thinking about asking or demanding their kids to pay up some rent then its not something that necessary or obliged as parents since we are the ones would be supporting our child but of course there would be that limitation because if your kid is already that old enough and having some work then its not that bad on telling or mentioning about it. If they would be helping out then its good but if its not then its better not to force it out.

I'll answer both of you at once

Jody.Drummer - you are absolutely right, pampering breeds selfishness and infantile adults. Not only is this nothing to be proud of, but it will also be extremely difficult for such children to adapt to an independent, adult, and REAL life, where there will be no caring, overly protective parents.
I adhere to the following concept: until a child learns to walk on their own, help them, support them, but do not carry them! When the child starts walking, warn them about the risks of falling and explain how to avoid them. When they fall, lend a hand and explain again why it happened.
But running around and wailing near the child, blaming “the pebble in his path” is absolutely unacceptable!

dunfida - and you are also right in saying that good parents try to prevent their children from experiencing the same things they themselves suffered from at the start of their lives. That's normal.
But here we must understand that there must be a certain limit when our care can begin to lay the groundwork for and subsequently produce a completely different result. We must love and support our children, but we must not raise them to be selfish, incapable of providing for themselves and their children.

Remember the saying, “Hard times breed strong people, strong people create good times, good times breed weak people, and weak people create hard times”? It applies to us and our children

The example you described is very good and it is easy to understand, so the conclusion we can draw here is that giving support to them is a good thing but not by continuing to push it, sometimes there are parents who encourage their children to pursue a field even though it doesn't make them happy but because of the hard encouragement it actually makes the child stressed, so we can't impose our own will sometimes the child also has his own will and if his interests have a good chance, it is better to support him than to push the child in the field we want even though they don't want it.

[GiftedMAN]

The idea is for the child to understand that their parents love them, raise them, and educate them, but that as a member of the family, they also have responsibilities and obligations, and that later in life, they will have to pay for many of the things that their parents give them for free. It is important to make sure that the child understands and realizes this reality, rather than living with their parents at their expense until the age of 40+, as sometimes happens...
 

Yeah, that’s just one amongst several ways of parents prepping their kids for what’s ahead. But the truth is that there should be some sort of age limit for this kind of preparation, some parents feel like as long as their kids have started earning some money, they should automatically start paying rent or share in the bills, regardless of their age, which in my opinion isn’t the right way to go about this.

[Razmirraz]

Snip.

Spoiling children by always giving them what they want is wrong, and giving them money continuously is not a good thing, even though it is natural for parents to do so. Spoiling children too much will make them too dependent on their parents, which will certainly affect them as they may dare to do anything because it is not their ambition but because they think their parents can solve any problems that may arise.
It is better for children to be independent, as this is not only good for them but also makes their parents proud.

Spoiling children by fulfilling all their desires will make children always be in the wrong circle, they will always depend on their parents because they assume they will always be there to solve their problems, the negative effect is that children do not have their own ambitions. It is not wrong for parents to want to give the best to their children, but there needs to be limits and discipline. They should be taught to live independently so that they are better prepared to face challenges in life, this method can help them become stronger and more confident people. When parents give them the opportunity to face challenges and solve problems on their own, it will help them develop good skills and character.

[WatChe]

Yeah, that’s just one amongst several ways of parents prepping their kids for what’s ahead. But the truth is that there should be some sort of age limit for this kind of preparation, some parents feel like as long as their kids have started earning some money, they should automatically start paying rent or share in the bills, regardless of their age, which in my opinion isn’t the right way to go about this.

It's not a wrong approach to ask your children to start taking responsibility of the house where family lives. Apart from financial responsibilities, parents must taught there children from young age to take part in household work like house cleaning, helping parents in gardening and more. When children start earning, they must give some money to parents because now they are now grown up and help their parents. Parents have done enough for us and it's not a liability but responsibility to share there load.

[purple_sparkles]

It's not a wrong approach to ask your children to start taking responsibility of the house where family lives. Apart from financial responsibilities, parents must taught there children from young age to take part in household work like house cleaning, helping parents in gardening and more. When children start earning, they must give some money to parents because now they are now grown up and help their parents. Parents have done enough for us and it's not a liability but responsibility to share there load.

I would really like it so that in old age I wouldn’t need help from my children, neither financially nor physically, I wouldn’t feel very comfortable accepting it. I really hope that I will be able to take care of myself and remain self-sufficient on my own, even in very old age. As for paying for housing, if this is done for educational purposes, then it’s a good thing, because if you live together, the expenses should also be shared. And children from a younger age should be taught how to earn money and plan their spending.

[barisbilgili]

Yeah, that’s just one amongst several ways of parents prepping their kids for what’s ahead. But the truth is that there should be some sort of age limit for this kind of preparation, some parents feel like as long as their kids have started earning some money, they should automatically start paying rent or share in the bills, regardless of their age, which in my opinion isn’t the right way to go about this.

It's not a wrong approach to ask your children to start taking responsibility of the house where family lives. Apart from financial responsibilities, parents must taught there children from young age to take part in household work like house cleaning, helping parents in gardening and more. When children start earning, they must give some money to parents because now they are now grown up and help their parents. Parents have done enough for us and it's not a liability but responsibility to share there load.

I see many such things in my environment, but they are done by children out of their own desire, not because of rules set by their parents. However, it is the child's self-awareness, and it stems from the upbringing by their parents. In my opinion, this is indeed something a child should do to repay what their parents have dedicated to them since they were little.

[Obulis]

The thing is very very simple. Come to think of it, before parents opens up to make such request from their children, that means they are short of finance and that makes such support from a child that has a job very necessary. I haven't really seen a financially well to do parents make such demand from their child just because he or she has a job (not as if it can't happen), but when financially well to do parents makes demands from the child it is usually for the childs benefits that's a way of keeping him or her accountable to themselves by ensuring they're saving a certain portion of their salary or preparing to invest.

[Royal Cap]

I think if a child is really mentally mature and has the ability to manage his own expenses, then learning to live independently is not a bad thing. It gives an idea of real life to him and also increases his sense of responsibility. However I think independence can not be achieved just by having money, The ability to make decisions according to age is also necessary. If parents save too much, that's wrong but if they let go of a baby too early, that can be a problem, too. The balance is right where the child gets the opportunity to learn but is not left completely alone.

[bakasabo]

In my own opinion,it’s ideal for a parent to demand rent from their child who’s stilling living with them.Even if you’re not living with them it’s still ideal to demand rent from your children as a parent.Most especially if the child has something doing that gives him/her money,in their own little way of supporting the family financially they can add up their money with that of their parents to provide the basic needs of life.But what I wouldn’t agree to is when the parent convince their children to indulge in illegal practices in other to provide or show support to the family.

Instead of demanding I think it is better to teach child that it is right to part in things family does. If family is cleaning the house, child should also participate. If they go out to have fun, child should also participate, if they paying bills, a child, if he makes some income (and it is not just pocket money of gifts), then he should participate in paying bills. Parents must teach that they are family, and they together are responsible for everything in family. However there must be levels. For example if they are family of 3, then a child should not be responsible for 1/3 of all family expenses, duties and etc.

[Pi-network314159]

Do you think it's fine as a parent to demand bills such as rent from your working-class child because s/he stays in your house?

Actually If the demand is mandatory on children to pay such amount then it's not right, but if the demand is a self voluntary payment then there is no problem. Because shearing bills with children shows a sign of incapability, meaning that the parents are not capable to be called parents. And the disadvantage of shearing bills is like shearing authority or power. Itake the parents and children have equal rights in decision making and other things. In fact I condemned the act of parents imposing or demanding rent from their children. It's an act of weakness and incompetency of parents.

[DrBeer]

....
The example you described is very good and it is easy to understand, so the conclusion we can draw here is that giving support to them is a good thing but not by continuing to push it, sometimes there are parents who encourage their children to pursue a field even though it doesn't make them happy but because of the hard encouragement it actually makes the child stressed, so we can't impose our own will sometimes the child also has his own will and if his interests have a good chance, it is better to support him than to push the child in the field we want even though they don't want it.

I really dislike the idea of forcing a child to choose a particular path or profession. Let the child choose what they like, what they enjoy, what they understand. Yes, we need to protect them from “bad choices,” but we don't need to help them with everything else.
 A child cannot immediately decide what interests them, as their interests will change with age, and at a certain point, they will understand what is most interesting to them. You just need to help and support them. And if something doesn't work out for them, help them understand why they couldn't succeed, which is also important to avoid repeated failures!

[JoyMarsha]

Why do parents train up their children, to give the best education, from childhood to adulthood? Is it not to help them in footing the bills of certain things when they come of age? Won't it be wrong that someone who lives with their parents can't support their parents in the little way they can upon they are working and living under the roof of their parents house. Their parents have been the ones catering for them from birth till the time they grow big, to work and earn money for themselves without charging them. Why not support your parents in a little way without being told, since they have done their part to train you?

A daughter or son who understands and knows the sacrifices their parents have made because of them won't hesitate to support their parents financially