‎Is knowing your fiance or fiancee a gambler a big red flag?

[Ziskinberg]

Gambling occasionally is fine, its part of enjoying life and attracting luck. So for me, it will never be considered a red flag. But if we are talking here gambling addiction, that's a big red flag for any partner who plans to marry that person who is deeply addicted into gambling. Not only it can destroy trust and ruin finances, but it could be a root for deep emotional distress that any partner never dream of experiencing.

Being a gambler alone is never a problem, but if that gambler faces a gambling problem, that would be a barrier for a happy and satisfying marriage life.

[Out of mind]

‎Just as the topic implies, I wonder how big a red flag it is, if you find out or your intended spouse funds out that you occasionally still gamble as a habit or gamble as a part time hobby of sort.
Hence the question, is knowing your fiance or fiancee a gambler a real big red flag when deciding to marry them?
‎

Of course, this is a big danger sign for many people, but this issue completely depends on the type of gambling of a person and his self-control. There are many who think that if gambling is played occasionally, then it is for entertainment and one can control oneself in between, then it is not a danger sign. But when a person loses his control and is in gambling for an excessive amount of time, then it is definitely a danger sign if he knows about his future life partner. And in my opinion, nowadays, when most people and families look for a person for marriage, they definitely know these things and later agree to marry. In that case, no one will knowingly marry a person who will lead his life to addiction by depending on another platform. That is why I think that if such things are minor, then the future husband and wife can adapt, but if it is excessive, then no one will adapt to it, because it will be a financial risk for the future and for themselves.

[Ishicryptic]

It is important to be open about our habits and hobbies in a relationship before it enters into marriage level so that each partner will know the others character and if they can cope with it. If you're a gambler it is important to be very open about it and allow your would be spouse to know that you're a responsible gambler who knows how to manage finance although your character towards managing money would tell if you can be trusted as a gambler. If I find out that my wife gambles I wouldn't be really worried because I know that she's a good financial manager that wouldn't waste the family's resources on excessive gambling although I rather prefer that I'm the only gambler in the family.

[Maslate]

No, not at all. I am a gambler, and she's a gambler, well that makes us perfect partners. Gambling is never a bad practice, one gets only bad if he/she intentionally manipulate the real concept of gambling. But if she is just gambling for entertainment, and she gambles with her extra money, I don't see being a gambler could be a red flag for anyone.

However, if you found out that the other person is piling up her debts due to compulsive gambling, ruin her job and break the trust of her family and friends, do not hesitate to change plans. Getting married to a person who has a gambling problem is like putting your life in hell in advance.

[maydna]

Yes, that is a real big red flag and we must solve it before our wedding takes place so we need to talk and discuss it privately and searching for how we can solve it. Playing gambling occasionally is okay but if he/she is a gambler then that is the problem because no one know when he will becomes addicted to gambling. We must be honest to our couple and telling to her/him that we need a help to solve our gambling habit. He/she will help us to cure our habit and distract it so we will not have to gambling anymore because we don't want to lose our marriage.

[nimogsm]

‎Just as the topic implies, I wonder how big a red flag it is, if you find out or your intended spouse funds out that you occasionally still gamble as a habit or gamble as a part time hobby of sort.
Hence the question, is knowing your fiance or fiancee a gambler a real big red flag when deciding to marry them?
‎

That is a rather multifaceted question. If a future spouse enjoys gambling or betting, I don’t see anything wrong with it. However, the frequency of the activity matters. If she plays every day, that’s a red flag. If she places bets say, on major championships only occasionally, I don’t see a problem. Here is what I would look out for: if she plays very frequently and has accumulated debt, I likely wouldn’t consider such a person for marriage. It should be a matter of first, the absence of harmful habits, addictions, and debt, and only then, starting a family.

[Tetu100]

If I find out that my wife gambles I wouldn't be really worried because I know that she's a good financial manager that wouldn't waste the family's resources on excessive gambling although I rather prefer that I'm the only gambler in the family.

That is for your own opinion, because as for me I won't take such gambling attitude from my spouse. Two wrongs can't make a right, imagine having two gamblers at home being husband and wife, who is going to correct the other person especially when then other person is gambling recklessly. Maybe even if I eventually marry a gambler as a wife she have to quite gambling for peace to reign else their will be no peace at home. I can't be busy on the screen or at the casino house trying to place some bet and my wife is doing same, who is surposed to take care of the kids and other things at home.

[Dave1]

Big red flag is your spouse is a big gambler or a addicted one. How can you build a future together after getting married when all the person will do is to gambling your life savings? Maybe it's ok if the person just play online gambling from time to time to have fun and enjoy.

Or just do sports betting as you know that the person is a big fan of any sports. But if it turns out that the individual is hiding his gambling past from you and you just discovered it then that will be a lot of thinking before getting into that marriage around that person.

[CryptoBuds]

No, not at all. I am a gambler, and she's a gambler, well that makes us perfect partners. Gambling is never a bad practice, one gets only bad if he/she intentionally manipulate the real concept of gambling. But if she is just gambling for entertainment, and she gambles with her extra money, I don't see being a gambler could be a red flag for anyone.
However, if you found out that the other person is piling up her debts due to compulsive gambling, ruin her job and break the trust of her family and friends, do not hesitate to change plans. Getting married to a person who has a gambling problem is like putting your life in hell in advance.

If it's just occasional light entertainment, no problem. But more than that is definitely a big problem.


Check out this report, it clearly shows that the divorce rate of problem gamblers is around 39-65%. And if they are a normal family rather than a gambler it's only around 18%. I think gambling is the biggest cause of marriage breakdown here. Along with this, the financial crisis, loss of trust and neglect are the main shocks here.

I think it's a bigger crime to keep it a secret until after marriage. Compatibility with a partner can be understood by being transparent from the start.

‎Just as the topic implies, I wonder how big a red flag it is, if you find out or your intended spouse funds out that you occasionally still gamble as a habit or gamble as a part time hobby of sort.
Hence the question, is knowing your fiance or fiancee a gambler a real big red flag when deciding to marry them?

It may be possible for many to simply gamble responsibly without putting their hands at the family expense. But most people don't last long. If your groom-to-be claims gambling is just a hobby, take a close look at his real behavior before signing the ledger. If you find his behaviour is normal then proceed.

[Cointxz]

‎Just as the topic implies, I wonder how big a red flag it is, if you find out or your intended spouse funds out that you occasionally still gamble as a habit or gamble as a part time hobby of sort.
Hence the question, is knowing your fiance or fiancee a gambler a real big red flag when deciding to marry them?
‎

It depends. If she lie to me about she is not a gambler but I found out that she gamble then that will raise a concern since it’s a break of trust but if she didn’t disclose it while I didn’t ask then there’s no big deal for me if I will find it later on.

I said it depends since some person doesn’t want to marry a gambler while their partner hide it from them just to pursue marriage. This is something that will create a problem later on.

So it’s important to disclose everything since we have different preferences.

[ZeroVinsonN]

‎Just as the topic implies, I wonder how big a red flag it is, if you find out or your intended spouse funds out that you occasionally still gamble as a habit or gamble as a part time hobby of sort.
Hence the question, is knowing your fiance or fiancee a gambler a real big red flag when deciding to marry them?
‎

If that was the case then everyone would be red flags, it would have made more sense if you were just asking about addicted gamblers but you are talking about every type of gambling and that includes a greater percentage of the population so if someone who gambles is a red flag then you probably won't see anyone else but I suppose everyone has a right to their choices in these matters, if s person doesn't want to be with someone who gambles then it's their choice to make.

[bisdak40]

‎Just as the topic implies, I wonder how big a red flag it is, if you find out or your intended spouse funds out that you occasionally still gamble as a habit or gamble as a part time hobby of sort.
Hence the question, is knowing your fiance or fiancee a gambler a real big red flag when deciding to marry them?
‎

For me, this is a red flag because as a gambler myself i know what is it like as this activity can cause financial issues in the future in not check properly. Even if the gambler fiancée is financially well off, there may came a time that issues with money will come because of gambling so if i know that my child is marrying a gambler, i would advise her to reconsider his decision or talk to her fiancee and solve the issue before getting married for i know that their married life will be chaotic if the husband continues his gambling activity.

[Die_empty]

That is for your own opinion, because as for me I won't take such gambling attitude from my spouse. Two wrongs can't make a right, imagine having two gamblers at home being husband and wife, who is going to correct the other person especially when then other person is gambling recklessly. Maybe even if I eventually marry a gambler as a wife she have to quite gambling for peace to reign else their will be no peace at home. I can't be busy on the screen or at the casino house trying to place some bet and my wife is doing same, who is surposed to take care of the kids and other things at home.

When I see couples getting drunk in pubs, I begin to wonder how they manage their homes. Let's assume that both of them begin to suffer from gambling addiction. What will be the consequences?  The family's finances will be in ruins because of reckless gambling. 

I support your stance that one person would have to quit gambling for checks and balances. My wife would always call me to order if I am spending recklessly on anything. She has access to my gambling platforms and would always give the necessary advice to enable me to maintain responsible gambling. 

[TopTort777]

Not a red flag for me. It would only be a red flag and second half was gambling secretly, lying about finances and stealing from family budget. Everything else are negotiable. If second half is spending own money, then it will never be a red flag. Cheating and lying are red flags in relationship imho. Everything else are nuances and can be sorted out. Anyway, I marry a person, not habits, desires, things are interested only for second half.

[$crypto$]

This is a personal matter, you can judge from the good and the bad, are there signs that your partner is gambling? For me, I honestly don't like my partner playing gambling, even if I play I will still hide it, behind all that my gambling is still controlled and my obligation to provide will not be disturbed.

[Nrcewker]

The opinion of whether someone is a red flag varies from person to person. According to me, every person has some bad habits. Some like to smoke, some like to drink, and some like to eat out. However, that doesn’t mean they won’t love you to the fullest. These habits alone do not make someone a red flag.

What I would add is that everything should be done within a safe limit. The same applies to gambling. If someone gambles occasionally, I don’t see an issue unless they become addicted and start risking all the wealth they have on gambling.

For me, the most important factor in choosing a spouse is how much they love me. Whether they are a gambler or not would only be considered after that, provided their gambling is responsible and not in pure addiction.

[eisen33]

‎Just as the topic implies, I wonder how big a red flag it is, if you find out or your intended spouse funds out that you occasionally still gamble as a habit or gamble as a part time hobby of sort.
Hence the question, is knowing your fiance or fiancee a gambler a real big red flag when deciding to marry them?
‎

I don't hide the fact that I occasionally place bets from my family. In fact, my laptop is always accessible, if necessary, I can easily show them my betting account, betting history, deposits, and withdrawals so they can see for themselves that I'm not losing money. But the truth is that I don't bet very often, and the amounts I wager are not large enough to cause concern among my loved ones. That's probably why it has never become a serious issue.

[Achalugo BTC]

If that was the case then everyone would be red flags, it would have made more sense if you were just asking about addicted gamblers but you are talking about every type of gambling and that includes a greater percentage of the population so if someone who gambles is a red flag then you probably won't see anyone else but I suppose everyone has a right to their choices in these matters, if s person doesn't want to be with someone who gambles then it's their choice to make.

You are right, everyone got the right to do whatever thing they want, which means one can decides to choose who they want to be with, whether the person its a gambler or not. Nevertheless its essential for one to always display the act of self-control each time they gamble, it doesn't mean that gambling itself isn't the red flag but losing control is, that's why one should discipline themselves by controlling their emotions or their minds towards gambling.

[Judith87403]

This is a personal matter, you can judge from the good and the bad, are there signs that your partner is gambling? For me, I honestly don't like my partner playing gambling, even if I play I will still hide it, behind all that my gambling is still controlled and my obligation to provide will not be disturbed.

Like you said its a matter of choice, its either you choose to keep your peace and your home by gambling responsibly or you quit gambling. But if you don't like you spouse to gamble, why hide and gamble as well? If you know your spouse won't like it same way you do, you could have just stop it for peace to reign in your home, a day shall come when your spouse will know about it, because nothing its really hidden under the sun. No judgement here, just facts, anyways the most important part its that you disciplined.

[tech30338]

This is a personal matter, you can judge from the good and the bad, are there signs that your partner is gambling? For me, I honestly don't like my partner playing gambling, even if I play I will still hide it, behind all that my gambling is still controlled and my obligation to provide will not be disturbed.

Like you said its a matter of choice, its either you choose to keep your peace and your home by gambling responsibly or you quit gambling. But if you don't like you spouse to gamble, why hide and gamble as well? If you know your spouse won't like it same way you do, you could have just stop it for peace to reign in your home, a day shall come when your spouse will know about it, because nothing its really hidden under the sun. No judgement here, just facts, anyways the most important part its that you disciplined.

I think this is something that can be be discuss in a different venue, tontalk about it and its already your fiancee meaning you already knew he is a gambler and that you are joining him in his things, maybe you are judging him because you cant touch what he have.