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Author Topic: What to do if you're crazy about a girl that has a boyfriend?  (Read 12148 times)
Mad7Scientist
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December 09, 2012, 11:47:45 PM
 #81

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It sucks, any advice?
Were any unjust means were used to get her in to the relationship that she is in? From my experience, I have learned that there may be a lot that you do not know of.

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Exactly my thoughts. I'm just waiting for the buffalo in the field to show signs of weakness, and then I'll pounce.
They might end up getting married, despite him being very weak. Things have been going that way recently. Metrosexual types have become more attractive to women.

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You're right on that last point. I try not to think about her but it is painful.
If it's painful it shows that your feelings for her are sincere.

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Nope, it's not about sex at all. It's about her being adorable and me wanting to be around her all the time. I wish I could talk to her anytime I wanted, it realy sucks that I can't do that.
Good for you. She should value that. If the other guy isn't valuing the same thing in her, then you should have an advantage. But does our culture value what is just? Or are we Communist, where the weaker is made to be first?

I feel for your situation and I wish I could do something to help you. I think the most I can do is help you understand and possibly show you that what is happening is not your fault and you are really in the right, depending on the situation. If the other guy is better than you, then that's just life. If he mislead her in to the relationship, then it's different. You see where I'm going.

I have witnessed a lot of bad relationship form with girls that I knew growing up. Things may be more complicated than your realize. The old wisdom of doing this may no longer be sufficient in our "modern" world.

Can you post a picture of the guy and the girl? It would be helpful to our support department. I'm serious about the picture. If being sneaky is scary to you, remember that you need to be a man and not be afraid if you are to have a girl. You can block out the eyes if you wish.

What part of the world are you living in? This is also important to me.

I agree with the advice about continuing to keep in mind that there are others out there. Don't be afraid about having feelings for more than one girl at the same time. Despite what is taught about that in Western culture, it's not really wrong. The idea that it is wrong to have more than one wife is really a very recent teaching for most of the world.

Have you ever watched The Office? As much as I hate that show, you know how there is Pam and the guy who works in the warehouse and then the guy who works in the office who likes her more? Is your situation anything like that?

Give me BTC40,000 and I can fix your problem with a 60% chance of success.

I hope things go well for you, but I don't want to encourage unfounded optimism.

Replies to other posting of the thread:
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Plenty of fish in the sea...
Not always.

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Follow your heart, you'll know when you find your soulmate.
There's no such thing as a "soulmate". Dating websites like to push this false idea that there is this one and only one person out there for you. Sure there may only a fraction of a percent of women that would be acceptable for you, but there's no "soulmate".

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Patience, most men are inherently stupid in their decisions,
Well this guy is asking for advice Smiley

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I disagree.  If you're crazy about her, it means you want her to enjoy herself.   Having a boyfriend or two helps with that.
Get a prostitute and save the rest of the good women for men who aren't looking for a sex object to throw away after a short while.

[/quote]Be the bigger man.. whip out your donger and compare.[/quote]
Bigger isn't always better. I hate the sexually degenerate society we live in.

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get her to fall in love with you.
It may be an uphill battle. A major change in strategy may be necessary, or realization that the opportunity for victory has gone by, and defeat must be accepted. It is foolish to fight a battle which you cannot win.

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If you go onto the TOR network, you can find people offering anonymous services for bitcoin where they will "eliminate" your competition for you
Where did my 1000 BTC go... and all you can do is leave negative feedback lol

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Also remember that "love" is a chemical process in our brain. If you can pull your higher level thoughts above the "primitive" programs running in your brain it will give you more power over your emotions. I recommend this video to learn a bit more about what is happening in your brain:
Don't listen to anyone who claims to have love completely figured out, especially someone who got published on a mainstream news source. Not even I have it figured out.

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What kind of namby pamby crap are some of you feeding this guy?  If you're an alpha male, show her and she'll come around... if you're not, then sulk back to your den and whimper about how unfair life is.  Although, the fact that you're posting here asking for advice is probably indicative of which direction that's going to end up.
As I mentioned, the old ways of how things worked in the world are passing away. We have epidemic levels of sexual and emotional dysfunction in men. Sperm count in US and Western europe has gone down to 13% of normal in 50 years. Most have that happen in the last 20 of those years. And I haven't even mentioned the situation with women.
candoo
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December 10, 2012, 12:25:32 AM
 #82

GIVE HER A  HUNDRED BITCOINS FOR FREE

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December 10, 2012, 03:13:40 AM
 #83

It sucks, any advice?

You have to be as much honest to both your feelings and towards her, as you can.

Express her your interest. Be very concise, don't overdo it. You don't know her that well yet. A simple "I'd like to know you better, wanna go for a coffee later?" will work wonders.

Remember that the golden rule is to keep interest level high. Do nothing and the opportunity passes. Do too much and you'll just drop your interest level in her eyes. Walk this subtle line, keep some mystery, but most of all, be honest to yourself.

Better to try and fail, than to never try at all. Smiley
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December 10, 2012, 07:33:17 AM
 #84

If you're an alpha male, show her and she'll come around...

This is so false, maybe in caveman days this is how it worked not today. I am not an alpha male yet I can pull some hots girl. Girls want three things, they want a person that will care for them, surprise them and someone who is funny.

And then when they finally find that they put that person in the friend zone while trying his patience constantly Tongue
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December 10, 2012, 08:16:05 AM
 #85

If you're an alpha male, show her and she'll come around...

This is so false, maybe in caveman days this is how it worked not today. I am not an alpha male yet I can pull some hots girl. Girls want three things, they want a person that will care for them, surprise them and someone who is funny.

And then when they finally find that they put that person in the friend zone while trying his patience constantly Tongue

I be honest, most girls from 18-25 really just want someone that is going to F them hard. But 26+ they want a real relationship.
goodlord666
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December 10, 2012, 11:04:52 AM
 #86

You use the boyfriend destroyer or something.


Herodes
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December 10, 2012, 12:22:56 PM
 #87

Haha, being obsessed with a girl.

I always found that there was always another girl to be obsessed about.
BrightAnarchist (OP)
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December 10, 2012, 01:53:54 PM
Last edit: December 10, 2012, 02:12:03 PM by BrightAnarchist
 #88

If you're an alpha male, show her and she'll come around...

This is so false, maybe in caveman days this is how it worked not today. I am not an alpha male yet I can pull some hots girl. Girls want three things, they want a person that will care for them, surprise them and someone who is funny.

Yes I agree that they want those three things and that they're not into alpha jerks, but they do want a strong, confident, successful and take-charge kind of guy (even if the femenists won't admit it). I don't see that aspect of female psychology going away any time soon.
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December 10, 2012, 02:03:39 PM
Last edit: December 10, 2012, 02:15:31 PM by BrightAnarchist
 #89

It sucks, any advice?

You have to be as much honest to both your feelings and towards her, as you can.

Express her your interest. Be very concise, don't overdo it. You don't know her that well yet. A simple "I'd like to know you better, wanna go for a coffee later?" will work wonders.

Remember that the golden rule is to keep interest level high. Do nothing and the opportunity passes. Do too much and you'll just drop your interest level in her eyes. Walk this subtle line, keep some mystery, but most of all, be honest to yourself.

Better to try and fail, than to never try at all. Smiley

Already done this, we went out during work for about an hour or so, it was great.

Now I realize this sounds like "overdoing it", but I have the perfect gift for her for christmas. Not that I'm a gifter guy (that's a stupid strategy that I would never go down, you cannot ever guilt a woman with gifts!) but there are very rare exceptions where you have an idea that's just so perfect, and so personal and life-changing (for her), that you just can't not do it. This is one of those exceptions. I vetting the idea by a female friend of mine, and she said to go for it and that the gift idea was "better than all the diamond rings in the world". But the best part is that given the nature of the gift I can absolutely do it "as a friend" without any unusual suspicion. Boyfriend or no boyfriend, I don't give a shit, I'm doing what I want. And even if it doesn't make a difference to my life (almost certainly not) I sure know it will make a difference to hers.
JohnBigheart
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December 10, 2012, 04:14:33 PM
 #90

Now I realize this sounds like "overdoing it", but I have the perfect gift for her for christmas. Not that I'm a gifter guy (that's a stupid strategy that I would never go down, you cannot ever guilt a woman with gifts!) but there are very rare exceptions where you have an idea that's just so perfect, and so personal and life-changing (for her), that you just can't not do it. This is one of those exceptions. I vetting the idea by a female friend of mine, and she said to go for it and that the gift idea was "better than all the diamond rings in the world". But the best part is that given the nature of the gift I can absolutely do it "as a friend" without any unusual suspicion. Boyfriend or no boyfriend, I don't give a shit, I'm doing what I want. And even if it doesn't make a difference to my life (almost certainly not) I sure know it will make a difference to hers.

Now I am really curious. What is it? A vacuum cleaner?

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Mad7Scientist
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December 10, 2012, 04:41:15 PM
 #91

It is kind of natural for a girl to be attracted to a man who is a little bit older. I assume the other guy is? Isn't there any other girl that you are attracted to?
BrightAnarchist (OP)
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December 10, 2012, 08:01:42 PM
 #92

It is kind of natural for a girl to be attracted to a man who is a little bit older. I assume the other guy is? Isn't there any other girl that you are attracted to?

No clue about the other guy.

Not right now... I know a few other girls that seem cool I guess. But I really like this one the best by far...
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December 10, 2012, 08:09:00 PM
 #93

It sucks, any advice?

You have to be as much honest to both your feelings and towards her, as you can.

Express her your interest. Be very concise, don't overdo it. You don't know her that well yet. A simple "I'd like to know you better, wanna go for a coffee later?" will work wonders.

Remember that the golden rule is to keep interest level high. Do nothing and the opportunity passes. Do too much and you'll just drop your interest level in her eyes. Walk this subtle line, keep some mystery, but most of all, be honest to yourself.

Better to try and fail, than to never try at all. Smiley

Already done this, we went out during work for about an hour or so, it was great.

Now I realize this sounds like "overdoing it", but I have the perfect gift for her for christmas. Not that I'm a gifter guy (that's a stupid strategy that I would never go down, you cannot ever guilt a woman with gifts!) but there are very rare exceptions where you have an idea that's just so perfect, and so personal and life-changing (for her), that you just can't not do it. This is one of those exceptions. I vetting the idea by a female friend of mine, and she said to go for it and that the gift idea was "better than all the diamond rings in the world". But the best part is that given the nature of the gift I can absolutely do it "as a friend" without any unusual suspicion. Boyfriend or no boyfriend, I don't give a shit, I'm doing what I want. And even if it doesn't make a difference to my life (almost certainly not) I sure know it will make a difference to hers.

You can give her the gift, but have this very clear in your head: "gifts are dangerous territory". The better the gift, the more you have to back up next and give her space, or she can feel overwhelmed. Its somewhat of a gamble, really. Gifts are good when you already know of her interest towards you, but can be bad when she feels you might be "misinterpreting" her actions of just wanting a "friendship".

Think a relationship like a rubber band. Make her want to pull you by knowing when to back up -- you do this by knowing to respect her personal space.

Show too much, and you'll come as needy. Keep the mystery up. Walk the line! Grin

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December 10, 2012, 08:12:18 PM
 #94

Not right now... I know a few other girls that seem cool I guess. But I really like this one the best by far...

Get to know them. See how it goes with them. See how you are around them. Try, fail, try, fail, try, succeed. Practice, practice, practice!!! Grin
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December 10, 2012, 08:45:43 PM
 #95

Also, clean the pipes before the first date, that will take the pressure off. Grin

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Xuah8LC-Cw
BrightAnarchist (OP)
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December 10, 2012, 09:46:45 PM
 #96

It sucks, any advice?

You have to be as much honest to both your feelings and towards her, as you can.

Express her your interest. Be very concise, don't overdo it. You don't know her that well yet. A simple "I'd like to know you better, wanna go for a coffee later?" will work wonders.

Remember that the golden rule is to keep interest level high. Do nothing and the opportunity passes. Do too much and you'll just drop your interest level in her eyes. Walk this subtle line, keep some mystery, but most of all, be honest to yourself.

Better to try and fail, than to never try at all. Smiley

Already done this, we went out during work for about an hour or so, it was great.

Now I realize this sounds like "overdoing it", but I have the perfect gift for her for christmas. Not that I'm a gifter guy (that's a stupid strategy that I would never go down, you cannot ever guilt a woman with gifts!) but there are very rare exceptions where you have an idea that's just so perfect, and so personal and life-changing (for her), that you just can't not do it. This is one of those exceptions. I vetting the idea by a female friend of mine, and she said to go for it and that the gift idea was "better than all the diamond rings in the world". But the best part is that given the nature of the gift I can absolutely do it "as a friend" without any unusual suspicion. Boyfriend or no boyfriend, I don't give a shit, I'm doing what I want. And even if it doesn't make a difference to my life (almost certainly not) I sure know it will make a difference to hers.

You can give her the gift, but have this very clear in your head: "gifts are dangerous territory". The better the gift, the more you have to back up next and give her space, or she can feel overwhelmed. Its somewhat of a gamble, really. Gifts are good when you already know of her interest towards you, but can be bad when she feels you might be "misinterpreting" her actions of just wanting a "friendship".

Think a relationship like a rubber band. Make her want to pull you by knowing when to back up -- you do this by knowing to respect her personal space.

Show too much, and you'll come as needy. Keep the mystery up. Walk the line! Grin



I could not agree more. You just have to trust me that this gift is an exception.

But you're right, it's giving too much off the bat. Maybe I'll still do it, but give her a little more time first. Like you said, "walk the line".

Easier said than done though sometimes... discipline... discipline...
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December 10, 2012, 10:19:16 PM
 #97

The moral of this thread is:
Internet nerds give bad dating advice.

Seriously, between the PUA bullshit, the "buy her out" comments, and most of the other comments treating the girl as an object to be "won" (as opposed to a normal human being that breathes and shits like everyone else), this thread has become a haven for bad advice.


She is with someone, man. Get over it and find an available girl....if she wanted to be with you, she already would be. All you are doing is setting yourself up to be that creepy guy who doesn't understand boundaries.

It's not what you want to hear, but it is the truth.
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December 10, 2012, 10:22:32 PM
 #98

All you are doing is setting yourself up to be that creepy guy who doesn't understand boundaries.

+1

Get laid. You won't even remember her while you're getting your cock sucked. Maybe easier said than done but move on.

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          .      .            .            .        .            .            .          .        .     .               .            .             .            .            .           .            .     .               .         .              .           .            .            .            .     .      .     .    .     .          .            .          .            .            .           .              .     .            .            .           .            .               .         .            .     .            .            .             .            .              .            .            .      .            .            .            .            .            .            .             .          .
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December 10, 2012, 10:48:22 PM
 #99

When I wanted a girl to know I was interested, I would simply go up to her and say hey I am Jasin, would you like to go have dinner one night? If she said she has a boyfriend, you just informed her you were interested and not creepy, straightforward and all at the same time you can be very apologetic and say something like oh I am sorry I did not remember I did not mean to be rude.

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December 11, 2012, 02:03:39 AM
 #100

Do any of the three in this situation have any religious morals that would affect anything? And I still want to see a picture of these people!

You know, pics or it didn't happen! What if this whole situation was made up?
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