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Author Topic: Letter to the EFF  (Read 34872 times)
FreeMoney
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August 15, 2010, 12:47:40 AM
 #21

Or it can be a verb, "If you like my work, bitcoin me."

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theymos
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August 15, 2010, 12:57:44 AM
 #22

Or it can be a verb, "If you like my work, bitcoin me."

That should be capitalized because you are referring to the Bitcoin network. Similarly, "Just Google it" is capitalized when referring specifically to the Google search engine.

These rules are all very trivial and unimportant, of course, but following all of English's ridiculous capitalization rules is a bit of a hobby of mine.  Smiley

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kiba
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August 15, 2010, 01:30:02 AM
 #23

>We also see you as an important partner to ensure that the Bitcoin community goes unmolested or at least won't go down without a fight.

If you ever do expand to protecting alternative monetary system, the Bitcoin community have hopes that it will generally  be unmolested or at least won't go down without a fight.

Reword complete. Good or not? Should I just delete this altogether?

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August 15, 2010, 01:33:12 AM
 #24

I think "unmolested" or any variant of "molested" is not so useful for wording
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August 15, 2010, 01:36:56 AM
 #25

I think "unmolested" or any variant of "molested" is not so useful for wording

Well, its definition is:

not interfered with, disturbed, or harmed.

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August 15, 2010, 02:54:11 AM
 #26

I think "unmolested" or any variant of "molested" is not so useful for wording

Well, its definition is:

not interfered with, disturbed, or harmed.


you could say - "the bitcoin community remains free of intervention."


I would leave out the "fight" part.
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August 15, 2010, 03:00:34 AM
 #27

If you ever do expand to protecting alternative monetary system, the Bitcoin community have hopes that it will generally remains free of intervention.


Reword complete. RFC.

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August 15, 2010, 06:26:23 AM
 #28

That is a truly awful sentence.

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August 15, 2010, 06:28:05 AM
 #29

Or it can be a verb, "If you like my work, bitcoin me."

That should be capitalized because you are referring to the Bitcoin network. Similarly, "Just Google it" is capitalized when referring specifically to the Google search engine.

These rules are all very trivial and unimportant, of course, but following all of English's ridiculous capitalization rules is a bit of a hobby of mine.  Smiley

I did not know that. After Googling "when I googled it" I realize I am not alone. Not that people on the internet have a clue, one person "google'd" something.

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August 15, 2010, 06:29:26 AM
 #30

That is a truly awful sentence.

Saying how awful it is doesn't exactly help me. The letter may not be that great, but it remains that I am the only one who is writing it.

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August 15, 2010, 06:42:20 AM
 #31

That is a truly awful sentence.

Saying how awful it is doesn't exactly help me. The letter may not be that great, but it remains that I am the only one who is writing it.

Sorry. I wasn't helping because I'm not interested in legal action. I'll do grammar action though. I was talking about this part mostly:

"..the Bitcoin community have hopes that it will generally remains free of intervention"

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August 15, 2010, 06:43:50 AM
 #32

The whole form of it is bad though because it's not a conditional thing. We hope to remain free weather their legal organization helps us or not.


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kiba
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August 15, 2010, 06:47:50 AM
 #33

The Bitcoin community hopes that it will generally remains free of intervention, weather or not if you ever expand to protecting alternative monetary system.

Reword complete. Request for comment.

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August 15, 2010, 06:52:21 AM
 #34

 
The Bitcoin community hopes that it will generally remain free of intervention, perhaps with your support in the future.

Or even better:

The Bitcoin community hopes to generally remain free of intervention, perhaps with your support in the future.


 

 

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mizerydearia
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August 15, 2010, 07:24:38 AM
 #35

The Bitcoin community hopes that it will generally remain free of intervention, perhaps with your support in the future.

Or even better:

The Bitcoin community hopes to generally remain free of intervention, perhaps with your support in the future.

That's good to avoid the assumption or reliance on that they will support Bitcoin.
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August 15, 2010, 09:52:53 AM
 #36

I'm sure that the EFF will welcome donations in bitcoin  Wink  Other than that, IMHO, it'd be enough to just emphasize how Bitcoin will further EFF's general goals.  Asking for support seems strange.  For Bitcoin to be useful, it must resist intervention inherently, through careful and well-tested design.  Freedom by permission is an illusion.  If that's all clear, I can't imagine why EFF wouldn't support Bitcoin.  Yes?
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August 15, 2010, 12:55:40 PM
 #37


The Bitcoin community hopes that it will generally remain free of intervention, perhaps with your support in the future.

Or even better:

The Bitcoin community hopes to generally remain free of intervention, perhaps with your support in the future.
 

Rewording accepted.

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August 15, 2010, 01:59:04 PM
 #38

Upgrade complete. Request for comment.



Dear EFF, the Bitcoin community appreciates your ongoing efforts to protect Internet freedom. The Bitcoin community hopes to generally remain free of intervention, perhaps with your support in the future.

The Bitcoin community is a society of users with over 30 business enterprises based around a new open source P2P cryptocurrency and monetary system called Bitcoins. The software for bitcoin is published under the MIT license. In addition to many other useful properties, Bitcoin has extremely low transaction fees, high divisibility, and is hard to produce and fake. These features make Bitcoin useful as a medium of exchange. As such it is probable that it will become a threat to centralized monetary system, which are often backed by governments. Members of the Bitcoin community have recognized the interest worldwide governments have in keeping their monetary monopoly. Their resulting actions could be a possible threat to the growing Bitcoin economy.

As such, members of the Bitcoin community would like to donate osome of our goods -- cryptocurrency bitcoins -- to you. Members of the community will donate X bitcoins unconditionally, worth about X USD. We will also donate more if you fulfill various wishes such as putting up a bitcoin donation button, setting up a node and more. Combined, this is X Bitcoins, which are worth X USD in total.

The EFF is free to convert the Bitcoins to other currencies, buy goods and services with the Bitcoins, or simply do nothing with them at all. The members of the Bitcoin community hope that the EFF will put the donation to good use.

mizerydearia
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August 15, 2010, 11:26:00 PM
 #39

"Dear EFF"
"Dear Electronic Frontier Foundation" ?

It seems a bit strange to reference "The Bitcoin community" each in the first three sentences.  Any suggestions on wording to make it seem less repetitive?

"over 30 business"
"over thirty business"

"The software for bitcoin is "
"The software for Bitcoin is " ?

"and is hard to produce and fake"
I suggest rewording this somehow.  "produce" may be good choice for word but I'm not sure for "fake."

"These features make Bitcoin useful as a medium of exchange."
I'm not sure about this sentence considering that USD is easily producable and USD are still useful and practically dominating medium of exchange.

"As such it is probable that it will become a threat ..."
"As such, members of the Bitcoin ..."
Perhaps rewording one "As such" to something else?

"donate osome"
"donate some"

Suggestion for rewording:
"members of the Bitcoin community would like to donate osome of our goods -- cryptocurrency bitcoins -- to you"
"members of the Bitcoin community have (expressed|shown) an interest in donating [cryptocurrency] bitcoins to you"
"members of the Bitcoin community have (expressed|shown) an interest in donating [cryptocurrency] bitcoins to you as a (gesture|sign|token) of appreciation"

"We will also donate more ..."
Until this sentence you have not used "we" and instead referred to "the Bitcoin community."  Perhaps this is an error?

Also, instead of incentivising or encouraging based on this sentence:
"We will also donate more if you fulfill various wishes such as putting up a bitcoin donation button"
Perhaps simply stating something like:
"The Bitcoin community has expressed more of an interest and feels safer in donating if you were to directly establish your own bitcoin donation button or page."
Perhaps the above sentence can be rewritten a bit, but I suggest communicating the message similarly.

"The members of the Bitcoin community hope that the EFF will put the donation to good use."
I don't think "hope" is good word.  It's not liek EFF has a track record of putting some money to good use and some to not so good use.  Do they?  If they do, then the above sentence may make sense and thus we are gambling.  But if they do not, then I suggest using a word other than "hope."
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August 15, 2010, 11:36:21 PM
 #40

Upgrade complete. Request for comment.

I've made edits in bold.  OK, many edits.  FWIW.

Dear EFF, the Bitcoin community appreciates your ongoing efforts to protect Internet freedom. We hope to generally remain free of intervention, and would welcome your support.

The Bitcoin community comprises approximately N users and over 30 business enterprises employing a new open-source P2P cryptocurrency and monetary system called Bitcoins. The software for bitcoin is published under the MIT license. In addition to many other useful properties, Bitcoin has extremely low transaction fees, high divisibility, and is hard to produce and fake. These features make Bitcoin useful as a medium of exchange. As such, Bitcoin may become a threat to centralized monetary systems, which are typically backed by governments. The Bitcoin community knows that governments will defend their monetary monopolies, perhaps by suppressing the Bitcoin economy.

As a demonstration of our value, members of the Bitcoin community would like to donate some of our goods -- cryptocurrency bitcoins -- to you. In order to facilitate that process, we request that you add a bitcoin donation button to the EFF website.  That would involve setting up a Bitcoin node, which is quite straightforward. We estimate that EFF would receive approximately X bitcoins per month, currently worth about Y USD. We note that, by accepting bitcoin donations, EFF might expand its support base (perhaps substantially).

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