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Author Topic: [ANN] UnicornHasher AS FEATURED ON THE COVER OF BUSINESS INSIDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  (Read 8489 times)
miaviator
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January 12, 2014, 07:45:04 PM
 #1

Announcing UnicronHasherTM!

Announcements:

*Seriously a unicorn that eats hay + asic chips and craps out bitcoins?  Sound familiar? Anyone? Gnar1ta$



1: Baby UnicronHasherTM
2: Live UnicronHasherTM 1PaH
3: News
4: FAQ


JUST ANNOUNCED: Baby UnicronHasherTM, In stock and ready to ship! Limited Quantities available!  I guarantee the Baby UnicronHasherTM will ship next week within 48 business hours and will *be capable of* producing the same or more BTC than my BFL/KnC/HashFast orders COMBINED produced in the first 30 days after payment!!!!!!!   GUARANTEE!!!!

Only .035BTC you can own one of a limited quantity of Baby UnicronHashersTM!!!!!!

Guaranteed minimum *(Per Gmaxwell/MiningBuddy "Promise" of 1Mhash of bitcoin mining power!)

Support child artists, Mine BTC, Prove that the Baby UnicronHasherTM is a "CUSTOM MINER"

LIMIT ONE PER CUSTOMER!

ONLY ONE BABY UNICORNS LEFT IN STOCK! ACT FAST!


SOLD OUT: Hand Made Baby UnicronHasherTM Prototype in stock USA Only Shipping.  New Reduced price .035BTC  Again this will produce the same or more BTC than my three ASIC orders listed above produced in the first thirty days after paying for them within 30 days!
SOLD OUT: V1 Baby UnicronHasherTM Prototype: http://i.imgur.com/nhvWCiX.jpg?2
SOLD OUT: V2 Baby UnicronHasherTM Prototype: http://i.imgur.com/Crz5S4g.jpg?1
In production V3 Baby UnicronHasherTM Prototype: BitcoinTalk Mod Edition!
In production V4 Baby UnicronHasherTM Prototype: Bitcoin vs Litecoin Edition!
Upcoming V5 Baby UnicronHasherTM Prototype: The Unicorn vs The Goat

PM Shipping Address and TX ID!!!!

1Jp68zp2nWZd1PqgkqDm7RoW4CqJacALkh

Live Unicorn Hasher
The greatest ASIC to ever hit bitcoin!

Pre-Orders coming soon! Only 10BTC *(To reserve your pre-order slot) expected delivery Q1 2014.  

Website www.unicornhasher.com will be live soon!  

Our Twitter account: @UnicornHasher is now live!

We only accept payments in BTC

I'll imply through third parties that you will get your B back if I don't ship.  I won't outright say it though.  

These unicorns will have at least 1 Horse Power which is ~ 12 50Thash. 1 Pet-A-Hash.

Photo Shopped photos coming soon!
Really neat though not functional 3D rendered images coming soon!

Power specs coming soon!
We don't have a per GH or per chip power spec yet.

Just released by our partner in India these will be green powered miners they can run on biofuels (Hay) or recycled electronics (55+nm asic chips) !!!  Save your electric money!  Save the Planet!

My attorney will write up a really good ToS that you will have to agree to.  That way you won't be able to sue me for loss of revenue.

I would like to sincerely thank the following manufacturers and sellers of asic hardware for letting me know that it is OK to sell LIVE UNICORNS and claim they will hash bitcoins:
Real Scamufacturers:
BFL - Butterfly Labs (*)
KnC - Don't care (*)
HashFast (*)
CoinTerra
Avalon (*)

Real ScamAssemblers:
BTMine (*)

Real Scams:
BTCOlympus - https://bitcointalk.org/index.php?topic=362756.0

Unconfirmed (up and coming) Scams:
Mammoth Mining - https://mammoth-mining.com/
Scrypt Asic International - https://alpha-t.net/ (Alpha Technologies, Script Asic International, SAI, Etc.) (*)



NEWS:

1/12/2014 4PM Just Announced We have an official Escrow Agent! CanaryInTheMine Will be handling all escrow transactions.  <- He will give you the above address to pay us directly....  

1/13/2014 Our V1 Baby Unicorn Asic was sold to Thyatis!  Unboxing photos will be copied to this OP!

1/13/2014 Estimated power for the 1HP Unicorn Hasher: A guaranteed minimum of 1 Pet-A-Hash

1/14/2014 New Review From railzand: The Unicorn Hasher is Fanciful!
tigers at 5ths is more fanciful than the unicornhasher...

1/15/2014 Unboxing photo of the V1 baby unicorn miner:




FAQ:
Q: Do you accept Fiat/PayPal/Etc Scammy reversible forms of payment?
A: Absolutely Not.  BTC Only

Q: Is this real?
A: This is the exact same language and posting style and promises given by BFL HashFast Avalon KnC Etc.  I have no reason to doubt it's validity.  Do I?

Q: Do you accept escrow?
A: Yes Our official escrow agent is CanarayInTheMine, He will gladly send you the BTC address listed above for payment directly to us.  

Q: What is my expected ROI on the Baby Unicorn?
A: The same or more BTC than the combined production of my BFL order + KnC order + HashFast order within 30 days of ordering.  Meaning take the day one order date for each of these companies first asic miners, calculate the ROI you would have received within 30 days of paying for the orders.  Combine that.  That is the minimum ROI on the Baby Unicorn.

Q: Will you ship internationally?
A: The Unicorn Hasher will be released worldwide.  The baby Unicorn is only available to US buyers.

Q: What if you don't ship/have delays/ etc.
A: Using some alternate accounts we will imply that ROI is guranteed and that refunds will be in the original form of payment.  We will likely allow you to roll your order into our next model if you don't receive this model.  We will also use a legal release form to get you to accept a FULL BTC refund of the amount of usd Paid at the time of the order.

Q: What is the difference between PH and PaH in terms of mining power?
A: One PH is a PetaHash or 1,000 Gigahashes of mining power.  One PaH is one Pet-A-Hash.

Q: Why should we trust you?
A: I've been on these forums for a long time.  I have a decent trust rating.  I am a forum donor.  I may or not own an actual unicorn.

Q: Can I do dirty things to my Unicorn Hasher
A: You deserve a long prison sentence in a 3rd world country.

Q: Do you actually scam people?
A: No, read the thread.

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January 12, 2014, 07:50:39 PM
 #2

ok i can be the first ?

looking job
miaviator
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January 12, 2014, 07:52:48 PM
 #3

ok i can be the first ?

Well, we may have already made undisclosed deals with very large companies who will be running "Unicorn Farms" and taking only private investor money.  So you could be the first public/individual buyer!

Updates will be provided as the manufacturing process moves along.

We'll announce partners, release cute little videos, make a bunch of BS twitter accounts etc.

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January 12, 2014, 07:59:08 PM
 #4

Yeah this sounds legit Roll Eyes

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January 12, 2014, 08:00:22 PM
 #5

Shut up and take my Money!
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January 12, 2014, 08:02:00 PM
 #6

ROFLMAO

Why don't I provide escrow via unicorn escrow services too!

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  Semux uses .100% original codebase.
  Superfast with .30 seconds instant finality.
  Tested .5000 tx per block. on open network
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January 12, 2014, 08:03:09 PM
 #7

My friend ordered your Dragon 0.2 HP six months ago, but it hasn't been delivered yet.

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January 12, 2014, 08:08:43 PM
 #8

How do we know if we can trust you? Will you allow visits to the office that you've just started renting (in the bad part of town)? I'm happy to sign a non-horseclosure agreement if we can meet.

When do we see the box of fans?

Bitcoin can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards.
BitFury ASIC miner hosted group buy [DONE MINING]
miaviator
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January 12, 2014, 08:24:04 PM
 #9

New Specs Released !!!!!

Check the OP!!!!

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January 12, 2014, 08:25:37 PM
 #10

Show me a picture of bigfoot, and I'm more than convinced that you have a fleet of (baby) unicorns waiting for shipping.
miaviator
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January 12, 2014, 08:26:03 PM
 #11

Yeah this sounds legit Roll Eyes

I can Assure you sir I am of the utmost sincerity.
 
This operation is to receive the majority of it's funding though inheritances, bank transfers, international aid, all funds provided by my GMAIL accounts SPAM folder!!!!

Your preorder costs are not going to be used for our research and development.  At least, we will never admit that they are!!!!!!!

miaviator
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January 12, 2014, 08:26:41 PM
 #12

ROFLMAO

Why don't I provide escrow via unicorn escrow services too!

Would you like to be the OFFICIAL escrow provider for Unicorn Hasher?

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January 12, 2014, 08:27:41 PM
 #13

My friend ordered your Dragon 0.2 HP six months ago, but it hasn't been delivered yet.

Have no FEAR.  Your friend is ELIGIBLE to transfer his existing Dragon .2HP order into a pre-order for the UnicornHasher 1HP device!!!!!!

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January 12, 2014, 08:29:51 PM
 #14

How do we know if we can trust you? Will you allow visits to the office that you've just started renting (in the bad part of town)? I'm happy to sign a non-horseclosure agreement if we can meet.

When do we see the box of fans?

I will get my address posted along with pictures of a really run down office building that seems to have just been leased with a brand new sign on it.

Of course you can come visit us with an appointment.  Our R&D team is LITERALLY hard at work developing the ARTIST RENDERING of the Unicorn Hasher 1HP miner.

(No Seriously My daughter is almost done with the first Baby Unicorn Hasher!  Next she will be working on the Unicorn Hasher 1HP!)

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January 12, 2014, 08:30:08 PM
 #15

Any pics / stats for the baby miners ??

I want 2 of those :p
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January 12, 2014, 08:31:25 PM
 #16

Sent payment for 2. When can I expect tracking? I need these before the next difficulty bump in 8 hours k thanks.

Now the questions I should have asked before sending payment like a retard.

-Escrow?
-Power consumption?
-Tech info (chips, controller, derp)
-References, fake third party accounts, how many decades have you been on eBay with 111% positive feedback?
-What are your personal scam defenses? Please deny vehemently how this isn't a scam by calling everyone in the thread a fucking loser who wishes they had 1% of your 10 million BTC.

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January 12, 2014, 08:32:25 PM
 #17

I'll take 2...but only if you promise not to deliver anytime in 2014, or if you do, just make sure it's broken or will break soon after delivery.

Losing hundreds of Bitcoins with the best scammers in the business - BFL, Avalon, KNC, HashFast.
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January 12, 2014, 08:36:07 PM
 #18

Any pics / stats for the baby miners ??

Baby Miner Photos are coming soon!  Within a few hours a photo of the Baby Unicorn will be Posted.

I CANNOT STRESS ENOUGH THE LIMITED STOCK OF BABY UNICORNS!

I am personally guaranteeing (I'll stick gnar1ta$ reputation on the line as well) YOU WILL RECEIVE a Baby Unicorn Hasher in the mail if you pay for one,  I ADDITIONALLY GUARANTEE THE BABY UNICORN WILL GENERATE AS MANY OR MORE BTC THAN MY BFL + HASHFAST + KNC Pre-Orders generated in the first 30 days after payment!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

No JOKE, No SCAM, No Pre-order.  The Baby Unicorn Hasher is A real product.  It plugs in with the attached USB cable and can ship as early as monday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Don't be left in the dark

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January 12, 2014, 08:42:11 PM
 #19

ROFLMAO

Why don't I provide escrow via unicorn escrow services too!

Would you like to be the OFFICIAL escrow provider for Unicorn Hasher?
Absuteley! Since you posted here on forums, this must be legit and I can be the official escrow

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  Semux uses .100% original codebase.
  Superfast with .30 seconds instant finality.
  Tested .5000 tx per block. on open network
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January 12, 2014, 08:42:55 PM
 #20

GreaterNinja and NinjaTech is interested Smiley

I'd like to see a POC.
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